Progression
At 28, Sarah liked to think of
herself as a progressive, modern woman. She dressed smartly, always. To work,
at the hospital, it was always a neat suit; short skirt, just below her knees,
pastel blouse and tailored jacket, always closed. The colours varied: midnight
blue, emerald green, shimmering steel-grey, classic black. She owned one lilac
hued outfit, bought at the insistence of her sister Miriam. It had taken much
for her to buy it; a junior medical director dressed all girlie and pretty would
never earn herself any respect.
Not that she was not proud of
being a woman. She was. She always wore skirts, for the breath of femininity
they afforded her. But while the strong, determined side of her womanhood had
helped her reach this level in the extremely patriarchal medical system, she
was sure as anything not going to let the soft, gentle side of her personality
manifest itself in delicate pastels, and undermine her image. Her boss, Dr
David Sher, could never respect that. And his respect was important to her. So
she never wore the lilac suit.
She could see why there were so
few women in the profession. Emergency surgery that has to be fitted in after
consultations, cuts that have to be stitched immediately, sick babies coming in
at 4 am. Most women wanted to be at home with their own babies at 4 am. A valid
choice, she had to concede, but she had progressed beyond that.
Miriam had made that choice. She
chose physiotherapy over medicine, for the flexibility it afforded her. To be
fair, Miriam had not done badly for herself. She had a husband, two children
and a morning's only position as head of paediatric physiotherapy. But she,
Sarah, younger sister and follower-of-Miriam's-footsteps, was Miriam's boss.
One thing Sarah was always
grateful for was her chronological placement in time. She thought back to the
early part of the 20th century, World War I era. Then women were vital to the
medical system, but as nurses; inferiorly educated doctors' aides. They cleaned
bedpans and held instruments, and not out of choice. The nurses she worked with
were wonderful, efficient and intelligent. She often asked, and found that most
of them had not wanted to be doctors. But at least they had the choice.
It was hard even in her mother's
era. She had been a doctor. Throughout her teenage years, Sarah heard how hard
it was to juggle medicine and a family. She had seen it for herself; how her
mother was always late to fetch them, how she never quite got through her
paper-work, how she had to work school holidays.
But Sarah wasn't even sure she
would ever marry, let alone have children. She was content to dote on little
Benjamin and Saul, any the inevitable other children Miriam would have. No, a
family of her own was not essential to her.
Her reverie was interrupted by a
knock on her door. Her head snapped up to see Dr Sher standing there, grinning.
‘Dreaming again, Sarah?' She
blushed. ‘You seem to be doing quite a lot of that lately.' She went an even
deeper shade of crimson. ‘Don't worry, I won't demote you for being a little
introspective once in a while. What I do want is for you to check on ward 3 for
me.'
‘Of course. David, you said you
wanted to talk to me?'
‘Yes, but after the ward.'
Minorly irritated that he was
putting her off, Sarah resolved to put it out of her mind and go about her
duties. Ward 3 was the paediatric ward. Sarah visited there often to see
Miriam. Then she found that she was assigning herself to that ward, often. The
children fascinated her with their innocence and antics. Regardless of how ill
and fragile they were, there was something about the children that was lacking
in the adult wards. After one marathon three-hour ward round spent treating
children and reassuring parents, Miriam had remarked that, for a woman who
didn't particularly want children, she related to them very well. The comment
was ignored.
Fortunately, for it was always a
wonderful thing to have a quiet children's ward, the ward was relatively empty,
so she was able to take her time with each child and not worry about missing Dr
Sher. In this ward, the occupants were children, not patients. Sarah could not
convince herself to call a five-year-old with a teddy anything but a child,
albeit a sick child. She was so involved with one particular conversation about
Winnie-the-Pooh that she failed to notice Dr Sher entering the ward. After
several minutes she heard footsteps, and turned around to see the doctor with a
very strange look on his face.
He abruptly snapped out of
whatever he was in, and cleared his throat. Turning to the parents, he said ‘If
you will please excuse us, Dr Klein and I have some business to discuss.'
‘How long were you waiting?' she
asked, somewhat apprehensive of his opinion of her work.
‘Oh, a few minutes. I always
enjoy watching you with the children. You have such a way with them, and with
their parents. In fact,' he added as they entered his office, one hand
indicating for her to sit, ‘I would like to make you head of paediatrics.'
Her surprise was complete. After
completing her 3 year training at the hospital, she had been invited to remain,
and become a junior director. But while she had hoped to eventually become a
head of department, she had not imagined it would happen so soon.
‘But,' his voice broke into her
thoughts, ‘there are conditions.' Her heart sank. ‘You will resign all your
other duties, and spend all your time in ward 3, where your new office will
be.' Her heart beat a little stronger; that was expected. ‘And I want you to
dress less formally. I want both parents and patients to feel that they can
approach you. I have every confidence in you.'
‘Thank-you, David.' Happy as she
was, she would not gush. ‘I would be more than happy to accept the position,
conditions included. When do I start?'
‘Monday.' He looked at her for a
moment, then added, ‘it's getting late. Come, let me buy you coffee at the
cafeteria.'
On Monday they had coffee
together again, to discuss her first day. The discussion had quickly strayed
onto all means of other things, until the night sister had eventually begged
them to go home. That night the gossip at the hospital started.
Sarah had no trouble adjusting
to her new position, excepting her new dress code. For the first week, she
alternated between the lilac and black suits, which Dr Sher laughingly pointed
out over coffee. Coffee together had become a standard way for them to end the
day, fuelling the gossip of which they were completely oblivious.
As she gradually became more
comfortable with her new position, and her new wardrobe, she also fell into an
easy rapport with David. Coffee downstairs had progressed to dinner across the
road, walks to her apartment, and eventually Sunday outings with Benjamin and
Saul.
*****
Eighteen months after receiving her promotion, Sarah sat at her desk reading
over some results. She glanced up, and seeing that it was already after
1-o-clock, began packing up. She signed one last report, and considered how,
since a year ago, it was one of her two signatures. She glanced at the clock
again.
Right on cue, Dr Sher poked his
head round her door. ‘Are you going home yet, sweetheart?'
She stood up and stretched. "I'm
nearly done, darling. What do you want for dinner?' For a few moments they
discussed domestic affairs, and then with a quick parting kiss, he left.
She thought back to how many
things had changed. She still wore tailored jackets, but with a long skirt, and
open over her rapidly extending abdomen. She had two titles now; Dr Klein and
Mrs. Sher. And she now only worked half days, sharing her directorship with another
doctor, another mother.
Miriam always teased her that
she was regressing. Less formal, less elevated title, shared position. Two
years ago she would have agreed. But now, she thought, walking past her
husband's office and feeling her baby give a kick, she was sure it could only
be described as . . . progression.
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