Posted on: 2011-01-19

Chapter 47 – Just Give Me Some Kind of Sign

Bethany Darcy and Lewis were in the solarium pretending to be jungle explorers when she heard voices in the entrance hall. It sounded like ladies. She hoped it was Miss Lizzy and Aunt Georgie, and ran to greet their arrival with her brother close behind. Millie's warnings to slow down went unheeded. When Bethany saw the third woman in the entrance hall, she stopped abruptly and stared at her. She looked as much like an angel as Mr Bingley.

The little girl, who came bounding into the hall, had a gaze so intense that it caused Jane to look away; but then her head jerked back in the direction of this child. The conversation with Mr Bingley about Mr Darcy's daughter was replaying itself in her mind. With a wide eyed look of alarm, she exclaimed, "Lizzy, I must talk to you."

Lewis was clinging to Lizzy's knee, and Bethany was looking up at her. "Miss Lizzy, Lew and I want to spend time with you. We have not seen you since church on Sunday. Mrs Mary said you were ill, and then Papa said you had to come here. We are worried about you."

"Bethany, Lewis, this is my sister Miss Jane Bennet. I need to speak with her. As soon as I have spent some time with her, I will come to you. Go up to the nursery and have Millie help you find a book you would like me to read. There is no need to worry. I am no longer ill. I came to London to help my sister. She needs me right now."

Bethany looked miffed but did as she was told. If she wanted this woman to be her mother, she thought she should obey her commands. Besides, the angelic lady did look like she was going to swoon. It must be true, she needed Miss Lizzy's comfort more than she and Lew did right this very minute.

When the children had climbed the stairs with Mrs. Annesley and Millie, Georgiana turned to Elizabeth and said, "Use Will's study. I will tell him where you are when he returns, so he does not barge in on you."

Elizabeth said, "Is there another room where we could go. I fear unpleasant memories would haunt me there, and I need to stay focused on what I say to Jane. She has been my best friend for so many years, and I have treated her abominably. Would it be possible for you to ensure we could be alone in the solarium? I pray the flowers will calm her."

Georgiana assured her of the privacy she requested.

As Elizabeth expected, Jane was in awe of the room. She walked around looking at the abundance of plants. She was particularly enthralled with the many specimens of orchids.

After allowing Jane to explore the wonders of the solarium, Elizabeth encouraged her sister to join her in the front of the room. She seemed a great deal less agitated than when she first saw Bethany. Once seated beside each other on one of the sofas, Lizzy took her sister's hands. The rigidity of Jane's shoulders and the lack of pliancy in her hands did not bode well.

"Are you that little girl's mother?"

Elizabeth could only hope her sister would respond favourably--once she heard the entire truth. Elizabeth spoke softly. "I am sorry I did not confide in you six years ago, but I was so very frightened that what happened to me would become public, and our whole family would be ruined..."

Jane interrupted her sister. "You have not answered my question. Is Mr Darcy that child's father, and are you her mother?"

Elizabeth stiffened at her words, but answered her sweetly, nonetheless. "I am Bethany's mother, but Lord Wolfbridge is her father. He raped me in this house six years ago. Mrs Darcy allowed him access when Mr Darcy was not home. She also persuaded me, once it was known I was with child, to give them the baby. That was the source of my inheritance."

Jane's tone was a little less accusatory as she said, "Where was Aunt Gardiner?"

"Cousin Susan was ill, and my aunt and I had been in Mrs Darcy's home several times. She sent me along to tea by myself. Neither of us thought there was any danger… a carriage was coming to pick me up, and I thought we had become more than acquaintances… it seemed to me we had become friends."

Jane looked at her sister's face, and remembered the hint of sadness that had been etched there for so many years. The disappointment, anger, and confusion that had plagued her since Mr Bingley's abandonment seemed to be seeping from her body--to be replaced by simple sorrow. She put her face in her hands and began to sob softly. The tears were for everything the two sisters had been through, both together and apart, since Tom's death. At some point, Lizzy folded her in her arms and began rubbing her back. They stayed this way until finally Jane was beyond an outward display of grief.

Elizabeth pulled apart and searched her sister's face. "Jane, when you wrote you had met Lord Wolfbridge, I was panic stricken that you would be hurt. The Earl is no better, and Mr Darcy and the Colonel believed he was the greater threat to you." Elizabeth turned her eyes to the floor and whispered, "The Viscount likes childlike women, and that is why I was so appealing to him at fifteen. Lord Elderton has had numerous mistresses, and they have all been tall, fair, willowy and very beautiful."

"Did you think I was so desperate that I would agree to be his mistress?"

"No, I was hoping my sensible sister would be able to see through them, but I was frightened because you were not yourself. Heartbreak was clouding your judgment, and I know from experience both those men can be very charming." Elizabeth faced her sister again and passion shone from her eyes. "I love you, Jane. I had been so tragically silly and was fooled by their consequence. I did not want to leave anything to chance. Your words to me last night at the theatre… that these important men would put you in company with other important men… were not my sister's words. You have never cared about someone's status. You have always cared for someone's worth as a human being, regardless of his or her place in society. Mr Bingley is a good man, and after his diligence to protect you, I am persuaded he loves you and wants the same things you do. Hopefully, he will tell you that himself later. For now, Mr Darcy wants to apologize for his behaviour. Stay here and enjoy the plants, and I will go find him."

Mr. Darcy had been informed where all the residents of his house were when he returned home. He had a note sent round to the local surgeon. He needed to confirm whether his hand was broken or not. He seemed to be able to move it, but the ache was fierce. The skin had been broken when his hand had collided with Edmund's face. Despite the pain, Darcy smiled at the thought of his cousin lying in a heap on the floor.

While he was waiting for the doctor, he went to the nursery to see Bethany and Lewis. Bethany rushed up to him and said, "I saw another angel today. She would be perfect as a wife for Mr Bingley. She is Miss Lizzy's sister."

Her father tried to put on a stern face as he responded to his daughter. "Bethany, why do you feel the need to be a matchmaker?"

His face must not have been very stern, for his daughter laughed at his question. "I am not sure what a matchmaker is. Hmmm… I only want you and Mr Bingley to be happy. He is a very nice man, and I think this new angel lady will be nice like Miss Lizzy and Mrs Mary. Papa, she looked a bit sick when I met her, and Miss Lizzy needed to comfort her."

"She is a nice lady, and you are right, she does look like an angel. I also think she would make Mr Bingley a fine wife. Let us say a prayer that everything turns out for them."

Lewis, who had been quiet as he listened to the conversation between his father and his sister, began jumping up and down and laughing almost uncontrollably. "I am going to say a prayer that you marry Miss Lizzy. She is scrumptious. Bethie taught me that word."

His father joined in his son's laughter. "That is a very good word. Miss Lizzy is indeed scrumptious." For some reason, at that moment, he felt some optimism with regards their marriage… or maybe his judgment was clouded by the throbbing in his hand. Regardless of the reason, he said rather imprudently in front of his children, "Lewis, I will pray also that Miss Lizzy will agree to marry me." As Darcy reached down to tousle his son's hair, he winced with pain.

Bethany noticed his hand and said very gravely, "Papa, what has happened to your hand?"

"I hit it against something disgusting. That word means the opposite of scrumptious. I am sure it will be fine in a few days."

Bethany gingerly took her father's hand and brought it to her lips. "There, Papa, that will make it better."

On his way down from the nursery, he stopped in the billiard room. Richard and Charles were having a game. Neither was playing with much concentration, but both seemed quite buoyant, and there was an air about them that seemed mighty pleased with a job well done. Richard was sporting a very malevolent grin as he said, "I was just telling Charles that my brother broke one of those beautiful teeth--not to mention his bloody nose--when he recklessly hit your fist. I think you might have fixed it so he will never again be thought of as the dashingly handsome Lord Wolfbridge. You would have made a damn fine soldier after all. Bravo, Cuz!"

Darcy beamed with satisfaction at the Colonel's praise. Quickly, he remembered to ask about the most important detail of Richard's clean-up detail. He pulled him aside while Bingley was busy sizing up his next shot. Though he kept his voice very low, the seriousness of his question was not lost on his cousin. "Do you believe the Earl grasps the need for secrecy?"

"Yes, I stressed how dishonoured the Fitzwilliam name would be if the depraved details of Edmund's behaviour became known. I think even a dedicated lecher like my father realizes his scion crossed a line that even the decadent ton might be unwilling to forgive. There is nothing more important to Lord Elderton than prestige--and being known as the father of a son who enjoys trapping, raping and inflicting pain on the underage daughters of gentlemen would not put him in good standing."

The surgeon was just leaving, when Darcy was informed that Miss Elizabeth had finished with her sister and wished to see him for a moment. He asked that she be brought to him.

When she arrived, she looked around his study with trepidation. He stood behind his desk when she came into the room, and she moved toward him and asked, "Will you sit beside me on the sofa over there. We can pretend we are sitting on the log at Rosings. We had some of our best conversations there, and I favour those memories over the one from this room."

He wondered if he dare hope that one of the things she liked to recall about their times in the grove was his embrace. Smiling reassuringly, he decided to try to ease her anxiety with some humour. "Should I call for some mugs of tea with milk and sugar... " His sense of propriety had completely dissipated with the day's triumph and he was unable to stay his tongue from lapsing into the risqué. His eyes twinkled and he could not suppress a laugh as he added, "... and a blanket?"

He was successful. Her fear evaporated. With a mischievous grin, she answered his tease with one of her own. "I wore the infamous green dress last night to the theatre, but Georgiana loaned me a beautiful shawl with silver threads to cover my assets."

"I wish I could have seen you. I am certain you looked beautiful. What was playing?"

"Oh Mr Darcy, it was just too perfect. There we were in the theatre's boxes, halls and refreshment lounge playing out Colonel Fitzwilliam's perfectly scripted comedy. Our mission was to save the country squire's daughter from the clutches of the evil earl, and below on the stage, Mr. Sheridan's The School for Scandal was playing out an equally amusing farce. It was not planned, but even Miss Bingley made an appearance--glowering at her brother at every chance. Miss Trent and Sir Gareth were doing their best to participate, but they kept breaking character to make silly love faces at one another. I believe your aunt had the best time. She definitely enjoyed distracting Lord Wolfbridge and preventing him from coming too close to me."

By the end of Elizabeth's rendition, Darcy was afraid he might be making one of those silly love faces at her. If he was, she did not seem to mind. In fact, she had a look on her face he had never seen before. After a few moments of sitting in silence, he felt compelled to break the mood they had fallen into. He told her some important information. "Yesterday I sent a letter from me, along with one from Mrs Collins, in an express to your father. We both explained to him all the particulars of why you had hurried off to London. In addition, I sent one to Mr and Mrs Gardiner with similar information. They have accepted my invitation to come to dinner tonight."

Elizabeth looked at him in awe, but then noticed his bandaged hand. "What happened?"

Darcy answered her with some very masculine bravado, "Lord Wolfbridge said some unsavoury things about you and Bethany, and I punched him in the face. He went flying across the room. Richard says I broke both his nose and one of his front teeth. He will not be quite so pretty to young lasses in the future."

Elizabeth's face registered concern. In a gesture reminiscent of her daughter, she brought his hand to her lips and kissed the bandage. He reined his emotions in and began repeating to himself, "I will not act precipitously, I will not act precipitously."

Elizabeth removed his hand from her lips, but did not relinquish it. She looked quite solemn as she said, "I wish I had been there. I would have liked to kick him once you had him on the floor." With a thoughtful expression she added, "Do you remember that place where I almost hit you with the bandalore?" When Darcy nodded in the affirmative, she continued. "I would have liked to kick him in that spot."

Darcy struggled to remain solemn, and choked back a laugh when he asked, "Why that spot?"

Elizabeth looked deadly serious with her reply. "Because Jamie... Dr Wilder told me it would be very painful and would disable an attacker for some time."

"It would indeed do that. You and I could become a dangerous duo. We could thwart vicious viscounts who threaten young women. I would take away their pretty looks with my punch, and you could make them impotent with your kick."

They sat for a while--she holding his hand--both looking at each other with silly faces. Finally he said, "We have dawdled long enough. I have added a new commandment to the original ten. 'Thou shalt not sit idly by.' I have a confession to make. Bring on the angelic Miss Bennet."

"Yes, we must get on with the tasks at hand. I promised Bethany and Lewis a story. On my way upstairs, I will bring my sister here."

Darcy arranged the room so that there was a chair placed in front of his desk. When Miss Bennet arrived, he showed her to it. They both looked apprehensive, neither knowing how to proceed.

Darcy began with a very serious mien. "Miss Bennet, I understand from your sister, she told you of the horrific events that took place in this house six years ago, which resulted in the birth of my daughter, Bethany. What she may not have told you, is that Miss Elizabeth was very angry with my family for her violation… she rightly felt she was owed some reparations for her ordeal. She came here to demand money, and I must admit, I thought poorly of her because of what I called at the time her greedy audacity."

Darcy cleared his throat and realized this confession was more difficult than he thought it would be. "I have always been attracted to your sister. We have compatible personalities… that is, when I am not allowing myself to blame her demand for compensation for my inappropriate thoughts about her."

Jane was unsure what point he was trying to make. She decided to say nothing and hoped she would eventually understand how his words were relevant to her situation with Mr Bingley. She chose to nod her head occasionally to keep him steady to his purpose. Her hope was that this interview would be brief. She understood Mr Bingley was in the house, and a frank discussion with that gentleman seemed to be needed.

"From our earliest acquaintance, Mr Bingley and I have had a division of labour. I advise him about matters of business and life's trials and tribulations, and he helps me to be comfortable in social situations. When we were in Hertfordshire, I renewed my acquaintance with your sister and became recklessly enamoured once again. Unfortunately, a man with whom I have had unpleasant dealings, Mr Wickham, was in town. Miss Elizabeth was frightened of him because he is a close friend of Lord Wolfbridge. She was afraid he was in Hertfordshire to expose her secret. I, on the other hand, was insensitive to your sister's anxiety, and observed her being friendly to Mr Wickham. Her intent was to extract knowledge of his purpose, but I became jealous and fell back to thinking your sister to be mercenary. It appeared they were plotting together against me. My anger with her caused me to think of you in a similar fashion. It took a great deal of effort and most of an hour, but I was finally able to persuade Mr Bingley that you were a fortune hunter who only wanted to be mistress of Netherfield. It is because of my stupidity that he abandoned you."

Jane gave Mr Darcy one of her nods. She had followed most of his confession, but the part that she heard best was how tough it had been to convince Mr Bingley. The thought brought a smile to her face.

Mr Darcy saw that Miss Bennet's placid countenance became enhanced by a smile at his latest admission about Mr Bingley. He decided he would, once again, be inappropriate and daring. It had worked with Elizabeth. "Your sister, Mrs Collins, was kind enough to tell me about Master Trent and your relationship to Netherfield. You are a truly commendable young woman. You will, indeed, make a model mistress of an estate. In order to put your acquaintance with Mr Bingley to right, I have just two other things to relate to you. The first is that your niece, Bethany, is a consummate matchmaker. I think she might have inherited that quality from your mother. When she first met Mr Bingley, she thought he looked like an angel. Earlier today, she told me the same thing about you. She thinks you should both pursue marriage based on your heavenly appearances."

Mr Darcy was rewarded with a giggle from Miss Bennet. He decided to continue to pursue his reckless course. "Oh, and by the way, did you know that Mr Bingley has a dip in his scalp?"

The serene Miss Bennet let out a very unladylike screech… something he would have expected from Miss Lydia. She jumped from her chair and said, "Where is he? Please, Mr Darcy, I must see him immediately."

That evening the angelic duo announced their betrothal--pending approval by Mr Bennet. Though they promised themselves to each other shortly after Darcy's confession to Jane, the official story of the proposal was that it had happened during a private meeting sanctioned by Mr Gardiner just before dinner. Their engagement set the stage for the announcement two days later of the betrothal of Sir Gareth and Miss Trent.

Elizabeth remained at Darcy House for a fortnight after the two engagements had been announced. During that time, Mr Bingley and Sir Gareth travelled to Hertfordshire. They were on a mission to receive the respective blessings of Mr Bennet and Sir Walter Trent. Sir Walter had been lonely in Bath during Becky's absence, and had returned to Longbourn for Easter. Luckily for his daughter's suitor, he had been reluctant to leave the company of his friends. Mr Bingley gained a companion for his journey, and Sir Gareth had a place to stay. Mr Bingley had alerted the staff at Netherfield to expect his return, even before Jane had accepted his proposal.

Gareth Hughes was a man of average height with massive shoulders, arms and torso narrowing to slim hips and strong legs with a slight bow from the amount of time he spent astride a horse. His ginger hair, sideburns and moustache punctuated a pleasant, strong-featured face with blue eyes and a ruddy complexion. His was the kind of face one expected to belong to the most jovial of characters, and Sir Gareth was not without a sense of humour; but it was his seriousness and sensible approach to life that had won the heart of Miss Rebecca Trent.

Becky had told him how important an elegant appearance was to her father, and he was apprehensive his countenance and body, which spoke of training horses would not suit the dapper tastes of his, hopefully, soon to be father-in-law.

In rank they were equals, with families of similar history. Sir Gareth's ancestor had been praised for his exertions of loyalty and awarded the dignity of baronet, in the first year of Charles II. Bryn Mawr, had been established in Derbyshire at approximately the same time Netherfield had been established in Hertfordshire as the seat of the Trent family.

Sir Gareth confessed his apprehension to his new friend, Mr Bingley, and before they left on their journey, Charles had taken him to his tailor and had him outfitted in a dark blue, double breasted jacket with gold buttons, a striped waistcoat, fawn trousers, and a neck cloth worthy of Beau Brummel. He took him to his barber and had his flaming locks tamed into an elegant coif. The day of his audience with Sir Walter, Mr Bingley saw to it that his friend's new boots shone like obsidian. Sir Walter was so enamoured of Sir Gareth's elegant ensemble and hair, that he forgot to notice his ruddy complexion and bowed legs. He accepted his future-son-in law with great enthusiasm.

Mr Bingley's interview with Mr Bennet was a different story. To the amiable young man it felt as though he was in the dock during their conversation. The particulars of Mr Darcy's persuasion and his ignorance of Miss Bennet's presence in London required extensive explanation and numerous apologies. Miss Bingley and Mrs Hurst's hostility to Jane was explored, and the details of his chastisement of his sisters required. Finally, the description of the rescue of Jane from the lecherous Lord Elderton, orchestrated by Colonel Fitzwilliam, at the behest of Mr Darcy, amidst the backdrop of The School for Scandal, brought chuckles to Mr Bennet. Charles decided to tell Mr Bennet of the peculiarities of his scalp, and with a final roar of laughter, he was acquitted and accepted.

Posted on: 2011-01-22

Chapter 48 – It is the Laughter We will Remember

One evening while Sir Gareth and Mr Bingley were in Hertfordshire, Georgiana gave a party for the new young ladies of her acquaintance. They were to stay the night, with an early start to a planned shopping excursion the next day as an inducement. The hostess was excited at experiencing what the Bennet sisters had always enjoyed… late night girl talk. Miss Darcy's greatest hope was that she could persuade Jane and Becky to share the details of their proposals.

Once the ladies were all gathered in her girlish pink bedroom, Georgiana gave Lizzy a very soulful look as she said, "Since I have no sister, it is important you enlighten me. My brother is a poor source of this sort of information. Tell me what is the appropriate reaction of fashionable young women to such a momentous occasion as a gentleman's offer of marriage… provided one is inclined to accept?"

Becky looked at Jane and signalled to her friend that she would go first. She was quite certain her story was the less interesting of the two. "I have been very fortunate over the years to be an honorary Bennet sister, but unfortunately I was in Bath when Mary accepted Mr Collins. Nor had Jane and I evaluated the particulars of her acceptance of Mr Bingley before Sir Gareth asked Lord Hastings for permission to have a private conference with me. From the bits of information she has shared since, I know my experience was not as filled with heart pounding excitement as was hers."

Rebecca decided she would begin her tale by relating those details that her father would be most interested in when next they were next together. "Of course, I knew what was about to happen; but at the time, all I could think about was what would Papa do? We were allowed to meet in my aunt's green parlour, and my biggest fear was that the walls would make my complexion appear sallow."

Becky's deliberate attempt to find the humour in her very personal memory brought a smile to Elizabeth's face. The conversation was not to her liking, but she did not want to spoil the obvious pleasure of Georgiana. She knew Mr Darcy did not harbour resentment at her cruel rejection, but all this talk of proposals made her wish her words had not been quite so brutal. She turned her mind from the remorse of that memory and pondered Georgiana's desire to know. Could she and Jamie be closer to an understanding than Elizabeth had thought?

Becky was enjoying telling of Sir Gareth's proposal and her acceptance. "As I said, I was quite certain he was going to propose, but I had yet to hear the words that would make our alliance definite. When it happened, it was much as I had read in novels. He got down on one knee, and he held my hand throughout." Becky let out a little giggle as she continued. "The only thing unusual about what happened was that he blushed often, and his face became the same colour as his hair, and both definitely clashed with my aunt's green parlour. I blushed as well, and I know that I must have looked very unattractive given that the colour of my gown was plum... but at least my complexion did not appear sallow." She waited for the laugh from her audience before she continued in a more serious manner. "He kissed my hand when I said, 'yes.' Later that day, we went together to tell his daughter, Sian."

Though Georgiana laughed at Becky's description, her thoughts had strayed to her own hopes. Would Sir Gareth's best friend be as formal? She had imagined Jamie would propose while they were playing a duet on the pianoforte, or perhaps in the midst of an intense political discussion. He was so passionate about both. In her dreams those emotions would spill over and cause him to declare his feelings for her. She hoped it would happen without warning, and it would end in more than a kiss on the hand.

Jane began her description with laughter. "When I first arrived at the billiard room, I was greeted by one of his amiable smiles. His expression allowed me to relax and feel hopeful he would accept my apology. I felt great remorse for my recent rudeness and was anxious to make amends. My forwardness astounds me, and I now realize I have more in common with my sister Lydia than I previously was aware. He agreed to accompany me to the solarium. My hope was that the room would be calming, and allow me to ask for forgiveness with poise."

Jane's face reflected the pleasure she felt in remembering what happened next. "Once we were seated next to each other in the solarium, I began by telling him I was sorry for my cut at Lord Colton's ball as well as my pique with him at the theatre and Lady Elderton's tea. He then apologized for allowing Mr Darcy to persuade him I was a fortune hunter, and for his sister's cruel lies. He told me that the two of you," Jane snickered as she gestured toward Georgiana, "were good friends, but neither had ever been inclined toward affection." Georgiana smiled and nodded as Jane answered her agreement. "I assured him I knew that his sister's contention about Miss Darcy to be an untruth, because unlike Miss Bingley, I was privy to your being in Kent with my sisters. After about a quarter hour of apologies going back and forth, he paused and took my hand. The words of his great admiration, ardent love and hope for a brilliant future together came tumbling out. I agreed immediately, and soon after asked if I could feel his head. He looked rather startled, but indulged me. He definitely has a dip, but it was more difficult to feel because he has more hair than Tom."

Jane and Thomas Trent's sister shared a glance filled with melancholy, until Becky once again injected humour into the confidences shared among friends. "So Janey, are you hoping he goes bald soon, in the furtherance of regaining the full enjoyment of your childhood fixation."

The entire group laughed, and Jane, once she was able to speak, replied, "No, I quite like his angelic curls, and hope to enjoy them for years to come, but if and when they do thin, I will have the curvature of his scalp as compensation." Jane's eyes sparkled and a mischievous grin stole across her face. "Since I had been so forward in asking to touch his head, he felt emboldened and asked if he could kiss me. I agreed, but was unsure what to do. It was quite enjoyable, and I am eagerly anticipating the next time. I have been thinking of little else than appropriate responses since it happened."

The other young women first expressed astonishment at her willingness to share such an intimate event with them, but the next moment found them bursting into giggles at the thought of being kissed themselves. That is, all but Elizabeth. She feigned amusement for the others, but could only imagine being held.

The gossip turned to Miss Bingley's capturing the admiration of the very wealthy, though quite portly, Lord Percy Goldstaff. Georgiana had searched Elizabeth's eyes before she wondered aloud whether this might merely be an attempt by Miss Bingley to make her brother jealous. "If so, she will be sadly dismayed by Will's reaction--or should I say non-reaction to such a gambit. She is the furthest thing from his mind these days."

Jane shared, without a hint of derision, what she had had been told by Mr Bingley. "Caroline is quite taken by Lord Goldstaff's beautiful house and his status as a widower with no children."

Elizabeth was tired of the conversation. It had been a welcome diversion that had not managed to subdue her anxiety. As her departure from London loomed, the doubts and longing that plagued her increased. She excused herself, without calling attention to her need to be away, by saying she was going to the nursery to check on Bethany and Lewis. She sat in a chair and observed them sleeping peacefully. Finally, the tears came, and she was able to purge her despair for another day.

Elizabeth made several trips to Gracechurch Street during her stay in London. She felt sorely in need of guidance from her aunt and uncle. The life she had built in response to her tragedy had been spinning out of control ever since Mr Darcy had arrived in Hertfordshire. She had talked some about her quandary with them at Christmas, and a bit more during her stay, prior to travelling to Kent. At the time of those discussions, the only real change to her situation was the welcome addition of her father's knowledge. Now she often felt panic rising in her throat when she contemplated the number of people who knew her secret.

The circumstances that had forced her to make revelations to Mary, Miss Darcy and Jane were recounted to the Gardiners, as well as the fact of Mr Darcy unburdening their secret to his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam. She put forth the assumption that Mary had told Mr. Collins, because he had not questioned her disguise. Elizabeth now knew from Jane that Mr Bingley had noticed her resemblance to Bethany, and was certain he would learn the truth quite soon. Still, she felt confident that he would tell no one--particularly his sisters--who he felt had betrayed him with regard to Jane. Elizabeth told her aunt and uncle that most who knew loved either her or Darcy or both, and would do anything to protect Bethany. Lizzy related some qualms about the Countess. There was evidence the Colonel might have revealed some of the truth to his mother. She seemed very sympathetic, but her loyalties were still an unknown. The Viscount had told his wife of violating a very young woman, a gentleman's daughter, who demanded money not to expose him to Mr Harding. Now that she had met Lady Eleanor, Elizabeth wondered how long it would take her to put the pieces together.

Elizabeth spent quite some time telling her aunt and uncle about Lord Elderton. He might have known all along, and even if he did not--he definitely knew now. Mr Darcy had assured her that the Earl accepted the need to keep the circumstances quiet. His reputation would be tarnished if the whole 'unseemly mess' became public. However, in return for his promise; he had demanded to know the details of the money transactions. Lizzy believed he had not been told everything by Mr Darcy, but he had revealed to his uncle that the Viscount had not paid a penny in reparations. To his nephew's annoyance, Lord Elderton had been quite pleased by that fact.

Mrs Gardiner noticed a wistful look on her niece's face when she revealed that Mr Darcy had paid the three thousand pounds negotiated as Lord Wolfbridge's obligation, as well as adding an additional three thousand purely as his contribution.

Both Mr and Mrs Gardiner saw that her dread of exposure seemed to be forgotten, at least for the moment, when Lizzy recounted Mr. Darcy's confrontation with his cousin. The damage his punch had done to the Viscount's face even caused her to smile

Mr Gardiner reassured his niece that exposure was still unlikely. None of those who knew had any reason to make the secret common knowledge. He also concluded that the intervening six years, and the regular occurrence of scandals among the ton would probably protect Elizabeth, Darcy and Bethany from the full force of gossip if the truth became more widely known. They were old news and lesser players to the London set. The reaction of the societies of Hertfordshire and Derbyshire were more of an unknown, but Mr Darcy's reputation and willingness to publicly defend Elizabeth and his daughter boded well for an adequate resolution in the event of exposure.

Before Elizabeth returned to Darcy House, she was able to find time to be alone with her aunt. After watching her niece fidget and begin to speak several times, Mrs Gardiner asked, "Elizabeth, something is bothering you… you can tell me. I have been your confidante these many years and circumstances have forced us to speak of the most intimate of topics."

At her aunt's prompting, Elizabeth blurted out, "Mr. Darcy proposed to me. I was very distraught that day because of several distressing events. The most upsetting was the letter I received from Jane, describing her meeting with Lord Wolfbridge, and how very charming she found him and Lord Elderton." She took in a deep breath to calm herself before she continued. "My rejection of Mr Darcy was vociferous, and I unleashed years of pent up anger toward his family upon him. Many of the things I said were demeaning and cruel."

Now, instead of looking chagrined by her behaviour; Mrs Gardiner saw her niece develop that same faraway smile that she had seen several times before at the mention of Mr Darcy.

"He actually handled my vitriol quite well. I knew I had hurt him, but he listened quietly to my ranting. Once I calmed down, he agreed to meet me the next day for a more civil explanation of why I could not marry. In the interim, he had taken control of the situation for saving Jane, and thanks to him, nothing untoward happened to my beloved sister and, as you know, she is now ecstatically engaged to Mr. Bingley."

"Why are you telling me this, Lizzy?"

"Because I love him, but I will never be able to accept him. I also love Bethany, Lewis and Georgiana. I would like to be with them."

"What are your reasons for refusing him?"

"One reason has to do with his family. Every time I even think about Lord Wolfbridge, I feel dread and repulsion. It would be repugnant to be in his company for any family events. His wife is Bethany's godmother. In addition, some of his family, including Lord Elderton and his aunt, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, and of course, the Viscount, feel much animosity toward me. News of my engagement to Mr Darcy could easily prompt one of them to retaliate by exposing the circumstances of Bethany's birth. Both of us have a duty to think of her first. I also worry about Mary and Mr Collins. Lady Catherine is not able to take his living away, but I fear she could denounce them to his parishioners as being related to a fallen woman."

"But wouldn't their reputations suffer as well as yours, if the truth became known? Lizzy, are there other reasons?"

"I worry that Mr Darcy would lose consequence among his tenants, servants and the people of Derbyshire when it became known his wife's sister was married to his housekeeper's nephew."

Madeline Gardiner shook her head in frustration. "That is Mr Darcy's concern. If he is not worried to whom your sisters are married… you should not worry. I am sure he thought of the significance of that connection before he asked you. What is your real fear?"

Elizabeth's voice dropped to a whisper. "I do not think I could allow him to worship me with his body. That is something he would vow to do before God, and I feel panic at the mere thought. When I attempt to visualize what would happen, I feel as though I might faint."

"Lizzy, I am unable to imagine what you feel. I remember being nervous as a young bride, but your experience is so very different from mine or your sisters'. My advice to Mary was... and will be to your sisters... is to trust their husbands to be kind, loving and caring. Despite the disparity of the circumstances, I still believe having faith in Mr Darcy is your answer." Mrs. Gardiner pulled her niece close. "He is a good man... talk to him. I know it is not a subject for proper young women to discuss with a man before they marry, but you are an exception. Tell him about your fears."

She released Elizabeth and watched as she considered her aunt's suggestion. "From what you have told me, you are becoming quite at ease confiding in each other. Yours is not a fear of the unknown, but a horror of the already experienced. Mr Darcy is the only one who would ever be able to assure you it will not be that way again."

Darcy House hosted a dinner party practically every night. The staff could not remember a time since the death of Lady Anne when there was so much entertaining. Amongst those who often came to dinner were Sir Gareth, Miss Trent, Mr Bingley, Miss Bennet, the Countess Elderton, Lady Eleanor, Lord and Lady Hastings, the Gardiners, and once, even Miss Bingley, the Hursts and Lord Goldstaff. The Hursts and Miss Bingley and her wealthy admirer were invited by Darcy at Elizabeth's urging--for Jane and Charles' sake. Elizabeth felt that despite the viciousness of the sisters' actions, they would be Jane's family. The animosity needed to be, at the very least, neutralized. She wished her similar dilemma was as easy to resolve. The idea of eating dinner with Lord Wolfbridge or Lord Elderton at the table caused her to shudder with repugnance.

The Colonel was an almost permanent fixture at dinner, despite having moved to Elderton House. With a very satisfied grin, he relayed to Miss Elizabeth and Darcy that his brother had left for parts unknown. It was Richard's opinion, he had gone to lick his wounds and let his nose heal. In addition to his exodus, the Earl had returned to Elderton. According to the Colonel, there was a wager in the betting book at White's as to whether Darcy was responsible for the state of Lord Wolfbridge's face. The Earl had departed London shortly after the first patron of that club asked him for the particulars of the cousins' dispute.

The Gardiners brought Thomas, Marianne and Susan when they dined. Sian had practically become a fixture in the nursery at Darcy House. Bethany fell madly in love with thirteen year-old Thomas. When he first arrived in the nursery, she had forced her attentions on him, and inundated him with questions about his cousin. She was surprised to learn that Miss Lizzy had taught him French using Perrault, the same as her father had done with her. During Thomas' answers of Bethany's probing questions, she learned that Dr Jamie was his cousin. Every new bit of knowledge she learned about this practically grown up young man made him more and more appealing. She decided she should challenge him to a game of chess.

Ten year-old Marianne had developed a love for telling stories from her cousin. She entertained her sister Susan, Master Lewis and his betrothed, Sian, who had her father's red hair and blue eyes, and was quite a chatterbox. She could not stop talking about the new mother she was set to acquire. Lewis, who was the most happy-go-lucky of little boys, felt a momentary stab of jealousy at her elation. He resolved he must pray harder for Miss Lizzy to accept his father.

Mr. Darcy had sent an express to Dr Wilder to invite him to join their merry party for a few days before Miss Elizabeth returned to Hertfordshire. Besides seeing her and Georgiana, Darcy knew he would enjoy joining in the festivities surrounding the engagement of his best friend, Sir Gareth, and Darcy's best friend, Mr Bingley. His arrival was kept a secret, in case an emergency would keep him from attending. Darcy did not want to disappoint Elizabeth, Georgiana or Bethany if they were anticipating Dr Wilder, and he was unable to keep the appointment.

Shortly after Jamie's arrival, Elizabeth was insistent he join her in the solarium. He noticed a sense of urgency in her eyes and went with her as unobtrusively as possible. Once out of view of the others, she forced herself into his arms and began to sob. Her act was totally out of character for her, and he knew immediately that something major was causing her feisty determination to falter. As he held her, he asked softly, "Lizzy, is your Irish soul failing you?"

She smiled up at him with tears in her eyes and nodded. He could do nothing but assure her he would help in any way to ease her troubles. She was able to pull herself together within a few minutes, and they agreed to find some time for a private conference. Elizabeth put on a brave face and returned to the others with the rather lame remark, "I just had to show Dr Wilder the solarium."

Darcy was concerned for Elizabeth. He had noticed since the engagement of her sister and her friend that she seemed to be indulging in a false cheerfulness when in company. If she thought no one was observing her, her face displayed a defeated expression. Somewhere, she had lost her indomitable spirit with just a touch of sadness, and instead the haunted look, as intense as six years before was back; and she seemed to hardly be able to hold it at bay. He was conflicted whether the second offer he was hoping to make, before she left for Hertfordshire, was what she was wanting. Somehow, he knew it could not be that simple. Still, he believed he must declare his determination to win her.

The dinners at Darcy house were full of lively discussion and a great deal of laughter. Opinions often covered a wide spectrum of political convictions, but always the conversations remained convivial. At the first dinner after Dr Wilder arrived, Colonel Fitzwilliam reported that he might be sent to Yorkshire to subdue the Luddites. *1 His disclosure prompted Mr. Gardiner to express his gratitude and the hope that troops would force an end to the wanton destruction.

Mr Gardiner was quite passionate in his condemnation of their actions. "I was invested in some of the wool and cotton mills that had looms destroyed. In my opinion, Judge Bayley *2 was too lenient in the trial last month in Nottingham. Now that the Frame-Breaking-Bill *3 has been enacted, hanging rather than transportation can be given as the penalty for their acts. That should let others know who are considering such crimes that the state is serious."

Sir Gareth had read of the trial, and was sure that transportation was not at all a lenient punishment. He had heard many died during the voyage to Australia. He answered Mr Gardiner's financially driven opinion on punishment with, "Lord Byron has made a speech in the House of Lords, decrying the use of the death penalty in these offences. I believe I feel some sympathy for his position. There were more than a thousand men who participated in the attack on Betts' frames. I think as citizens, we should try to understand the root cause of these protests and find a fair solution."

Dr Wilder took Sir Gareth's statement as an opening to express his sympathy with the mill workers' struggle. "Yes, I have heard from acquaintances in the area that there is widespread support for their actions. I understand that the knitters Betts hired to operate the frames had never served an apprenticeship, and could be paid less money for doing the job. These practices are seen in that area as destroying the livelihood of many families. Someday, someone will get the bright idea to transport the looms to Ireland, and hire poor starving Irish men to operate the machines for a pittance."

Mr Gardiner rolled his eyes at his wife's cousin. "Jamie, they destroyed somewhere between fifty and seventy frames valued at four hundred pounds apiece. It is a threat to the livelihood of the owners when their property is destroyed. This war with Napoleon has put the entire British economy at risk. We must protect the owners, and give them what they need, despite the cost in these troubled times."

The next comment heard came from a very unlikely source. Lady Eleanor had a sharpness tinged with glee in her voice as she said, "These Luddites seem to be attacking the wrong target. It is the owners of these frames and their drive to increase their revenues that should be attacked. It is unfair to destroy the lives of so many in order to improve the lot of so few." A smile crept across her face as she continued. "My father realizes the potential danger he faces if his workers should turn their anger from the machines they operate, and demand of him what is their due for the years of hard work on his behalf. He is having secret chambers built in his mills and his house, just in case the dawning of this consciousness occurs. However, he forgets to whom he is entrusting the creation of his hiding places. He certainly is not going to build them himself..." the entire group saw the twinkle creep into the eyes of the normally subdued Lady Eleanor, "...but can he trust the confidentiality of the labourers?"

The Colonel looked at Eleanor with unabashed admiration and laughed heartily at her statement, and soon the others at the table joined in the mirth. Even Mr Gardiner, who did not agree at all with her sentiment, saw the humour in the predicament the owners faced.

Fitzwilliam Darcy noticed that Elizabeth barely observed the lively discussion. This was not like her. The Lizzy he knew and loved would have been in the thick of it… defending her opinion with great passion. He had to get to the bottom of her distraction and despair.

Elizabeth and Jamie went for a walk in the park the next morning. This lovely spring morning, the park was filled with spring blooms, and trees were almost, but not quite, in full leaf. The air was soft and caressing, and redolent with the scent of flowers. The beauty about her was not enough to take her cares away, but it was a momentary distraction. The breeziness of the day had brought out children flying kites. Jamie noticed, they brought the first true smile to Lizzy's face. She spoke of coming back later with Bethany and Lewis. She hoped the kites had been brought to London from Rosings. Just in case, she questioned one of the older boys to find out if there were any shops nearby that sold kites, and she got a positive response and an address two streets away. The smiling anticipation of spending time with them in the park on a beautiful day in April crumbled from her countenance as Lizzy realized in a few days she would be in Hertfordshire, and they would be somewhere else. What cruelty for April to offer her such beauty and the promise of fresh beginnings, when none could be had for her.

"Lizzy, what is the matter? You were not this unhappy before Bethany was born. Tell me what is causing your hopelessness?"

Lizzy told him all that had occurred in Hertfordshire and Kent with Mr Darcy. She finished by telling him of their efforts to thwart Lord Wolfbridge and Lord Elderton, and the resulting rescue of Jane. The story of Mr Darcy's punch that broke both the Viscount's nose and front tooth brought the first smile Jamie had observed that reached her eyes. The light was on only for a second, but soon she continued with a sombre face. "I love him, but I cannot marry him."

For the next half hour, they talked of her fears of retaliation, exposure and the physical requirements of marriage. She told him of her conversation with her Aunt Gardiner, and he quickly gave her a second opinion… that concurred with his cousin's diagnosis. "Lizzy, I agree with Maddie. Talk to him. You have described to me conversations that many married couples rarely have. You want something, but are afraid to grasp it, and he is the only one who can persuade you to try. Men and women do not communicate their feelings in our society. I often wonder how many potentially delightful marriages never happen because one or the other is afraid to candidly communicate their wishes… waiting for a sign that gives them hope before they proceed."

"But Jamie, women are thought improper and vulgarly forward if they speak too openly of their wishes to a man."

"I know, and you and I are unable to solve that societal inequity, but you and Mr Darcy have already discussed many things that well-bred women should never utter… and still he wants to marry you. He is a good man. Tell him of your fears… perhaps he can make a plan to save you from your despondency, much the way he saved Jane."

The trio of young women were due to leave for Longbourn the next morning. There was no real need for Jane and Becky to finish the Season in London, and they were anxious to begin the preparations for their weddings.

Elizabeth arose early, leaving Georgiana hugging her favourite doll, Violetta, and sleeping soundly. Looking out the window toward the park, she noted a gloomy day that perfectly matched her mood. As per the routine that had been established during her stay at Darcy House, she and Mr. Darcy, as the early risers, were the first in the breakfast room. They were soon joined by Bethany and Lewis. At breakfast, Mr Darcy asked Miss Elizabeth if she would agree to a private audience with him on the sofa in his study… their substitute for the log at Rosings. Just as Becky had related, she was quite sure she knew what was to happen.

A positive answer continued to be something she felt she was unable to offer, but she did plan to tell him of her love, and to follow the advice of both her Aunt Maddie and Jamie. It pained her that she might hurt him once again. Despite her agreement to tell him of her feelings, she was still certain their situation was hopeless.

Once seated on their 'log,' Mr Darcy took her hand and gazed into her eyes. "Dearest Elizabeth, my feelings are unchanged, and as God is my witness, they will never change. During our fortnight living together in this house, we established an easy routine… breakfast together with Bethany and Lewis, listening to their hopes and concerns, laughing together, discussing the news in the papers, maybe even arguing good naturedly, perhaps a walk if the weather permitted, reading in easy companionship in the library and delightful dinners with friends and family. The best was tucking our children in at night and together reading or telling them stories. I want you to share that life with me."

Elizabeth agreed that the picture he painted of their routine was idyllic, and his calling Bethany and Lewis, 'our children' touched her. Despite her desire for the life he described, she felt compelled to say, "Since your proposal in Kent, I have realized that I too love and admire you. However, I believe we are truly 'star crossed.' Your family continues to present an obstacle to our happiness. How can we be sure that the contempt the Earl, the Viscount and Lady Catherine feel for me would not erupt into cruel actions directed toward either my family, or more importantly, Bethany? It seems much more prudent, especially for her, that we part and allow the animosity to subside."

Darcy had prepared himself for this concern. "I agree my family is a major dilemma that I must face, but the only disapproval is from the three you mentioned. The rest--Georgiana, Richard, Lady Cassandra and even Lady Eleanor--are on our side. They want us to be together, and they know our marriage will make Bethany and Lewis happy."

Darcy looked at the portrait of his mother and said a little prayer, before he spoke the words he hoped would allay her fears. "The principles of the Fitzwilliam and Darcy families have been at war since long before you and I were even born. These two houses, though intermarried, have a history of skirmishes to see whose values would dominate. My parents argued about this dispute, and at times it seemed the differences might tear them asunder, but their love prevailed. My father was forever threatening to challenge my uncle to a duel, much as I threatened Edmund. My mother often had to persuade Lady Cassandra to convince her brother of his foolishness. Our problem is just another clash in this ongoing war."

His eyes reflected the guilt he felt for all he had put her through as he confessed. "My relationship with you has seen this battle between familial principles played out; and you were forced to endure much Fitzwilliam arrogance, disdain, conceit, and pride. But lucky for us, I am also a Darcy, and the characteristics of honour, loyalty, compassion, and humility are also present. If you will trust me, I know I can ensure we will have that marriage I described to Lady Catherine, strong affection, admiration, respect and common purpose. Please, let me attempt to solve the quandry presented by my family."

Elizabeth sat in silence, contemplating his thoughts on his family. She knew she had to make an attempt to explain her other fear. She cleared her throat and looked down at their entwined hands. Her voice was barely a whisper. "I continue to feel repulsion at the thought of marital relations. I have tried to envision what the act would be like, but was unable to get beyond a certain point without beginning to tremble and experiencing shortness of breath." She looked up and gave him a weak smile. "I did like being in your arms. I felt warm and safe, but I know I also enjoy being held and comforted by my sisters. Anything more and my mind refuses to go further. You deserve a wife you can worship with your body. I fear I can never be that to you."

Darcy laughed to himself as he realized what he was about to admit to this woman he so desperately loved. A year ago, he would not have believed he could talk about such things with her. He too cleared his throat and looked at their hands. "I understand your concerns, but I believe there is a solution for this dilemma as well. When Anne and I married, she was very frightened. The 'act,' as you call it, was not enjoyable to her at all. That part of our marriage required time, trust, patience and communication before we 'worshipped' each other. My love for you is so much stronger than anything I ever felt for Anne. My feelings for you have endured six years of stupidity." He too looked up and smiled at her. "In my mind, you were always arguing with me… making me rethink all my insufferable arrogant opinions. Even if Edmund has ruined this part of marriage for us, I still want your companionship."

Elizabeth brought his hand to her lips. "You are a good man, Mr Darcy. I will think about all you have told me."

Darcy's smile broadened and he said, "I believe it time I told you about my father's proposals to my mother."

Elizabeth laughed. "Actually, Anne told me about their courtship the day she persuaded me to give up Bethany. She said he was very persistent."

"Yes, he was. For six years, you have put up with the Fitzwilliam side of my character. Well from now on, it will be my Darcy character you will contend with. I will be as relentless as my father. Elizabeth, do not trifle with me. If you are unable to withstand my numerous proposals, tell me now. One word from you will silence me forever on the subject of marriage." Darcy knew this was a risky gambit, but her answer would allow him to determine whether there was hope.

Elizabeth smiled at him and said teasingly, "I am willing to put up with your relentless offers. However, I continue to be unsure whether I will be able to accept, but I must admit the thought of your pursuit presents a sort of delightful diversion to anticipate. Are you certain you are willing to endure any Bennet barbs I may throw if am I am displeased with your approach… or are you smugly relying on my mother's side to my character to take control and win the day?"

Mr Darcy laughed, and felt immensely relieved to see mirth had replaced her despair.

"Mr Darcy, I have one final question. May I call you Will?"

He answered, "Yes," and enfolded her in his arms for the second time in their acquaintance. He thought of attempting a kiss, but decided they had come too far today to risk any backward progression caused by precipitous actions.

*1 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Luddite
*2. Judge Bailey, who had presided over the trials of the Nottinghamshire Luddites without giving any death sentences, offered his services for a trial to take place in York but was turned down. The Authorities wanted a "Hanging Judge."
*3 On February 14, 1812, Parliament passed a bill making frame-breaking a capital crime.

Posted on: 2011-01-26

Chapter 49 – Something Wicked This Way Comes

The second day Elizabeth was back at Longbourn, an express arrived from Miss Darcy.

Darcy House, London
18 April 1812

Georgiana

Elizabeth's smile was followed by the inevitable tears as she observed the childish drawings from Bethany and Lewis. Lewis had put a little boy on the pony, and Lizzy felt he had tried to make the rider wave at someone. Confirming her suspicion, Georgiana had written the legend 'Lewis on Little John, waving at Miss Lizzy' at the bottom of the picture. Bethany had labelled her picture, 'my family' by herself. The woman was holding the little boy's hand, who in turn was holding the little girl's hand, who was holding the man's hand. They were stick figures, whose gender was identified by their clothes and hair. All four were depicted wearing very big smiles. The woman and the little girl did indeed have the same colour hair, as did the boy and the man.

Mr Darcy's letter was not long, but very moving.

Dearest Elizabeth,

Will

Elizabeth folded the letters and pictures and put them in her pocket. Every few hours, she took them out to peruse again. She decided she would write Georgiana, and include a note for Will. She began the process by taking a walk to plan what to include. She determined she would write Lewis and Bethany their own letters. Perhaps she could persuade Kitty to do some drawings. Lewis would surely like a picture of a horse and prone rider galloping across the meadow from the prospect of Oakham Mount--the way she had seen his father both the first and last day he was in Hertfordshire. Bethany might enjoy a picture of Caliban standing sentinel next to Lizzy while she played her Irish whistle.

When Lizzy arrived back at Longbourn, Lydia was ecstatic with the news that Charlotte had come to visit to seek permission for her to spend time in Brighton with Maria. The militia was leaving in two days time for an encampment there, and the young women would travel a fortnight later.

Charlotte extended an invitation to Lizzy as well, but was not surprised when she refused. It was obvious something of great importance had transpired in either Kent or London to her. She had returned to Hertfordshire preoccupied with some quandary. Mrs Forster quickly turned her attention to reassuring Elizabeth she would provide a delightful but safe experience for her sister. With her next breath, she revealed the true motive for the request when she explained how invaluable Maria and Lydia would prove now that she was once again with child.

Elizabeth surprised her friend with the intelligence that she knew Colonel Fitzwilliam and Colonel Bledsoe would be joining the Forsters in Brighton for a holiday.

Her explanation for her knowledge was much abbreviated, and went into none of the excitement of her dealings with the Colonel, and only dealt with meeting him while in Kent with Mary and Mr Collins. She was able to relate what high esteem Colonel Fitzwilliam felt for both Charlotte and Colonel Forster.

"Colonel Bledsoe is bringing his fourteen year-old sister, Sarah. Their parents are deceased, and he has her in a very fine school for young ladies. Once I told him about Maria and Lydia possibly visiting, he thought it would be a good time to give her a bit of a holiday as a birthday present. She will be turning fifteen while in Brighton." Her face drifted as she captured a memory. "I understand from Colonel Bledsoe, his sister is very naïve and looks quite childlike… much like you at that age... I mean looking childlike, not being naive."

Charlotte did not see the flash of disquiet her reminiscence evoked. "I am certain the young ladies will delight in sea bathing, and there are events at the assembly halls and frequent fireworks displays to enjoy as well."

Elizabeth asked the question that had been bothering her since she heard of the decampment of the militia. "Is Mr Wickham going to Brighton?"

"Yes, while it is true he has accumulated debts, so far he is not guilty of anything that would warrant his being discharged. It was made clear he is expected to repay his obligations. Your father and my father provided an accounting of all the merchants in Meryton who are owed, and Lawrence will ensure he sends regular remittances from his pay. In addition, he will be carefully watched with regard any young ladies that capture his attention." Charlotte gave Elizabeth a curious look as she added, "Colonel Fitzwilliam was also quite interested in whether Mr Wickham would be in Brighton."

Elizabeth decided on a chatty letter about Lydia's trip to Brighton for Georgiana. She made no reference to Mr Wickham. Bethany and Lewis should receive identical notes thanking them for their pictures, and telling them they were missed. The actual ache and longing she felt without them would be omitted. Kitty was pleased to make the required drawings to include with the correspondence. Her message to Will was folded and sealed inside the pages for Georgiana, Bethany and Lewis.

Dearest Will,

Elizabeth

Elizabeth went to Lydia's bedroom the night before she left for Brighton. "Lydia, I want you to know, I hope you have the most wonderful time in Brighton. I will think of you often with envy. Sea bathing must be a truly marvellous experience, and I have even heard it is good for your health."

"Oh, Lizzy, I am going to have such a delightful time, I just know it. Besides sea bathing, there will be assemblies, maybe even a real ball or two, fireworks and oh, so many officers."

Elizabeth smiled at her sister's enthusiasm. "Yes, I understand you are to meet Colonel Fitzwilliam and Colonel Bledsoe. I met Colonel Fitzwilliam in Kent, and he is a most agreeable gentleman. I am certain Colonel Bledsoe will be equally as enjoyable an acquaintance. I understand they have been best friends with Colonel Forster for more than ten years."

"Oh yes I am on pins and needles just thinking about making their acquaintance. Colonel Forster says that both love to laugh and enjoy telling stories of their adventures. Did you know Colonel Fitzwilliam was in Spain?"

"I did know and heard some marvellous stories of his adventures. Lydia, do not tell Papa, but I am going to give you a note to give to Colonel Fitzwilliam. I want him to know you are my sister, so he will watch out for you, just in case you need a protector."

"Oh Lizzy, do not be silly. What could happen with all those officers around to protect me?"

"I know, Lydia, I am just being a nonsensical, overprotective, big sister, but please humour me. I have something I want you to take with you." Lizzy had brought the silver dagger wrapped in a beautiful paisley shawl she had bought in London that Lydia had admired several times since she arrived home. She unwrapped the knife and handed it to her sister.

Lydia got a look of wide-eyed apprehension at the weapon and asked, "Lizzy, who do you think I am going to encounter in Brighton… French spies?" She picked up the knife and admired the filigree handle. "This is beautiful, but it is also very sharp. It could be quite deadly to an attacker. Where did you get it?"

"Aunt Gardiner's father got it for me. It was for protection during the journey from Derbyshire home to Longbourn." Lizzy waited for Lydia to digest that bit of information before she forged ahead. "I have one other piece of advice for your protection. A kick to a man in the region between his legs will be extremely painful; and he will have difficulty moving for a period of time after the blow." Lizzy demonstrated the exact spot and then continued, "I know you will meet only delightful people in Brighton, but I still think it prudent to have some protection when you go out in the world. Keep the knife in your reticule at all times. My note to Colonel Fitzwilliam will ask him to instruct you how to use the dagger."

"Lizzy, you are the best and wisest sister a girl could ever have. May I take the shawl as well? You know it will probably get chilly at night." Lydia grinned at her older sister.

With a giggle, Elizabeth answered. "Of course, Lydia, you may take the shawl. I would not want you catching cold." The sisters hugged, and Lizzy left to pen the note to Colonel Fitzwilliam.

Longbourn, Hertfordshire
3 May 1812

Elizabeth Bennet

Lydia, Maria and Sarah did indeed have fun. They went sea bathing almost every day, and explored the town together when they were not helping Charlotte. One of their favourite activities was playing with the children on the beach, making castles in the sand or just looking for treasure. Shells, polished rocks, and driftwood, all had their interest to one or more of their party as they walked along the shoreline. Lydia had an idea of making necklaces from the polished bits of debris they found. Her next idea was to suspend shells on string from a dowel. This, she hung by a window, and listened to the shells clinking together in the breeze. She found the sound soothing, and set about making one for each of her sisters as gifts.

The three colonels did indeed tell the most marvellous stories of France, Portugal, Spain, and Colonel Bledsoe had even been to the Caribbean and the Americas. Lydia thought Colonel Bledsoe was the most pleasing man of all those she had ever met. He loved to dance, he was forever laughing, and he told the best stories. He was strong and muscular, and his hair was exactly the same dark brown colour as Lydia's. However, hers was a mass of Bennet curls, and his was straight, with just a slight wave. His eyes were like nuggets of coal. She did not think she had ever met anyone with eyes so dark and piercing. Within a week of meeting him, she was sure she was in love.

He and Colonel Fitzwilliam had taught her how to use Lizzy's knife. Their main advice was to be bold if she was forced to strike. They said her height was an advantage, and complimented her on her strength and lack of timidity. Colonel Fitzwilliam chuckled when he told her how her natural forwardness was advantageous in this situation. They pointed out the spot on the attacker's left side where she could avoid the rib cage and get through with an upward thrust right into his heart.

Colonel Bledsoe's sister, Sarah, who preferred to be called, Sally, turned fifteen the first week they were in Brighton, but to Lydia, she still looked twelve. She had absolutely no bosom, and no hips. Sally quickly became infatuated with the handsome and charming Lieutenant Wickham. No matter how many times Lydia told her he would never be interested in her because she had no money, she refused to listen. She even had the nerve to accuse Lydia of jealousy, because he paid much more attention to her than any of the others. Lydia noticed that Colonel Fitzwilliam watched Wickham like a hawk, and Wickham often left the room when he was present. Colonel Fitzwilliam must have said something to his friend Colonel Bledsoe, because the next day, Sally complained that her brother told her she could no longer talk to Wickham.

Sally also had a bad habit of wandering off when they were out exploring the beach or the town. Lydia felt a responsibility for Sally because she so admired Colonel Bledsoe. She wanted him to think of her as responsible and mature. Three weeks after they arrived in Brighton, the young women were visiting shops along the high street. Maria and Lydia were looking at ribbons in one shop, when Lydia noticed that Sally had disappeared.

She and Maria left the shop to see if they could see which direction their friend had gone. Up ahead, Lydia saw Sally walking with Wickham. The two young women followed as quickly as they could, and observed their friend talking animatedly to the handsome lieutenant. Before they could catch up with the pair, they turned into the yard of a house and went inside. Lydia became very frightened for Sally. She had heard many times from Lizzy to never agree to be alone with anyone, even women, who were not close acquaintances. She tried to remain calm, and realized they needed reinforcements. She sent Maria back to get her brother-in-law and the two other colonels and urged her to memorize the directions to bring them to this house. With a look that she hoped was the right combination of urgent need but without any trace of the panic she was feeling, she told Maria to make haste.

Lydia was definitely petrified, and her knees felt like they might give way. Still, she felt duty-bound to save her friend. With trembling hands, she approached the door and knocked. There was no answer, and she willed herself to knock louder and shout for those inside to open the door. Finally Wickham did, and she shot past him. Once inside, she whirled around and said very loudly, "Where is Sally?"

Wickham smirked at her. "She is fine. You do not need to worry your pretty little head about your girlish friend. I brought her here to make the acquaintance of a fine gentleman. He is a viscount, and will one day be an earl. He observed her on the beach and admired her. I agreed to bring her to him for an introduction." He walked toward her with a suggestive look. "I am sure by now they are very pleasantly engaged upstairs. Perhaps we could enjoy ourselves down here while we wait for them to finish."

Lydia drew the knife out of her reticule and brandished it before Wickham. "Do not come near me. I know how to use this." At that moment she heard Sally emit a blood-curdling scream. The sound, which came from the floor above, was the most horrifying thing she thought she had ever heard. She prayed the three colonels would arrive quickly. She bounded up the stairs, leading with her knife. She frantically searched all the rooms along the second story corridor. Finally, the last door she opened, revealed Sally with her bodice ripped, cowering in a corner. Lydia saw the man in the room out of the corner of her eye. He seemed to be sizing her and the knife up. Lydia took off Lizzy's shawl and handed it to Sally. "Cover yourself and run down the stairs. If Wickham tries to stop you, tell him you will kick him here between his legs." She pointed to the juncture between her two limbs. "My sister Elizabeth says it will be very painful and disable him for some time. Maria has gone to bring your brother and Colonel Forster and Colonel Fitzwilliam. Run, Sally, make haste, I will deal with this disgusting piece of trash."

Lydia turned to the man in the room, and kept the knife before him at the height of his stomach.

The man smiled at her, smug in the knowledge that no one would ever punish a viscount for attacking young Sally. He would tell the authorities she agreed to come to him for some pleasure. Wickham would back him up. It was a complication to have his brother in the picture, but he was the second son and not the heir to Elderton.

Lydia noticed the man was well dressed and quite handsome. He looked something like Mr. Darcy, except his nose was crooked.

He began to talk, and she noticed one of his front teeth was broken. She continued to hold him off with the knife.

"And who might you be… young Sally's mother? Who told you about hurting a man in that place? I imagine you are quite experienced; and one of your many lovers told you the secret."

Lydia knew he was baiting her, and trying to confuse her with the hope of perhaps overwhelming her. She resolved to keep her wits about her, and decided to do some disconcerting herself to this arrogant, hateful man. "I was told about hurting a man there by a very wise sister. She is also the one who sent me to Brighton with this knife."

"Oh please, do tell me what this extraordinary sister's name is. You did not say whether your wise sister was older or younger. I only like women very young… like your friend Sally. If your sister is young, I might enjoy enjoying her."

"My sister's name is Elizabeth Bennet, and she is five years older than I am. She is not only wise, but utterly fearless."

Lydia saw two things in this stranger's face. He continued to smirk at her, but she also saw something else in his eyes. Could it be fear?

"Oh, so you are one of the five Bennet sisters. What a troublesome lot of women you all are." He observed the confusion in Lydia's eyes, and to his misfortune, the braggart in him could not be repressed. "I have already had your wise, Miss Elizabeth Bennet. She was not so fearless when I had her six years ago, and gave her a bastard. She was so frightened for you and your sisters that, unlike your friend Sally, she undressed herself."

Afterwards, Lydia could not describe to Colonel Fitzwilliam what happened. The best answer she could provide was that she snapped. She remembered Lizzy's fear of being touched, which caused her to deny herself the pleasure of going to assemblies and balls. She remembered the joy that had always danced in her sister's eyes, only to be replaced by an ever present hint of sadness when she returned to Longbourn five years ago. Lydia remembered how much she loved Lizzy. He had said she acquiesced because she was worried about her sisters, and there was suddenly a powerful awareness of how much Lizzy loved her. With thoughts of Lizzy's sacrifice for them all swirling in her brain, Lydia plunged the knife with tremendous force into the spot where she had been taught, and in the next instant pulled it out. She stood there in a daze, holding the bloody knife and staring at the Viscount. He looked startled and tried to speak. Soon there was a gurgle in his throat, and blood spilled from the corner of his mouth as he collapsed on the floor.

Posted on: 2011-01-30

Chapter 50 – Say Anything

Richard Fitzwilliam saw his brother, eyes fixed and staring, lying on the floor. Blood was everywhere… on his clothes, on the floor and on the silver weapon. It was everywhere but on the yellow frock worn by a very confused Miss Lydia. She held the knife away from her body, as if in preparation for an attack. The dazed look she gave him contained no recognition, but it was obvious her frozen defensive posture was not for him. His presence propelled her eyes to settle on the dripping dagger, and the first emotion he saw her register was surprise at its presence. She readily relinquished the offending object, and he pushed her toward a chair and forced her to sit.

The physical remains of violence were things he had seen many times during his military career. The feeling of trepidation that threatened to overwhelm came from a different source--this was his brother. Now that he had disarmed her, what should he do with the knife, and more importantly, what should he do with the young woman who had killed Edmund? He sat on the edge of the bed holding the dagger in a similar manner to Miss Lydia.

Richard became aware that an important idea was insisting he allow it to enter his consciousness. Finally it succeeded in penetrating through the alarming absurdity that had arrested his thought process. There were many of his dearest friends, family and loved ones, whose happiness depended on what he did next. A dresser with a washbowl and pitcher… and a towel registered. He wrapped the knife in the towel and washed his hands. He returned to the edge of the bed and tried to put together a plan.

Instead, as he stared at his brother's startled gaze, his thoughts drifted to the past. They had not always been at odds. Richard had embraced Edmund as his heroic leader through their early childhood adventures. There was a time they had been as close as Bethany and Lewis. The cleavage came when Richard was about nine and the heir to Elderton was eleven.

His mind's use of the word cleavage triggered a flash of recollection. It was from the same summer the distance with his brother had begun. Disjointed sensory impressions flooded his mind. He could hear his mother's voice discussing the oddity of the word cleave, smell his aunt's lavender scent layered on top of the aroma of the abundance of flowers in the solarium, feel the coolness of the tile as he sat cross legged on the floor, see Darcy's inquisitive look and Edmund's bored one at his mother's explanation, and taste the almond cake they were enjoying as together they planned their annual summer picnic. Why this remembrance was etched so firmly was a mystery, much like why the word itself meant both to split apart and stick together.

That summer, the impetus for the shift came when he and Fitzwilliam caught Edmund with a foxhound pup tied to a tree in the woods behind the house. He had started a fire, and had several staves partially in the flames. As they spied on him from behind some bushes, he methodically took one out of the fire, blew on the ember at its tip and touched the burning end to the dog. The pup howled in pain. In horror and without thinking, Richard had rushed toward his brother and wrestled the stick from his hands while Darcy untied and picked up the dog. They never spoke of what had happened… perhaps they should have, but from that moment, the time of sticking together became less and less, and the time of splitting apart became more and more. Other acts of deliberate malice, as well as the belief he was above almost everyone of his acquaintance, became standard for his behaviour.

Lord Elderton's oldest son had begun wooing Miss Harding while the younger son was thousands of miles away fighting for king and country. He had set about winning the object of his brother's affections almost immediately after his departure. Richard rued the day he had disclosed his admiration--and more importantly the amount of Eleanor's dowry--to his brother. His tongue had been loosened by the French cognac Edmund had thought a fitting toast to the success of his brother's military pursuits. That evening of shared fraternal warmth had set in motion the final act of cruelty that had caused his feelings for Edmund to harden into hate.

Richard's was again captured by his brother's accusing eyes, and he acknowledged that he was not without some culpability in the loss of Eleanor. She had not been wholly aware of the depth of his feelings. His lack of declaration before leaving to fight Napoleon's troops had been meant to spare her. The Colonel had prepared himself for the possibility she might accept another while he was away. What he had not expected was that his brother would seize the moment and pursue her as a prize he needed to support his profligate ways. He looked away from the body and remembered Lord Wolfbridge's cruelty toward Lady Eleanor. Once the vows were said, no attempt was ever made to think of her wants, needs or desires. At least he did not inflict physical pain the way Richard suspected he had with Miss Elizabeth... and would have done with Sally.

This thought brought him back to the situation at hand. He needed to find a solution for both Miss Elizabeth and her sister. He looked over at Miss Lydia, who seemed a bit more alert. Unfortunately she was staring at the body on the floor, and there seemed to be panic in her eyes. He spoke to her. "Do not look at him. Look at me, Miss Lydia. Tell me what happened. I will protect you, but first I must understand what occurred here."

Lydia had a look of concentration on her face. "I do not remember exactly, but I know I felt fury as I have never experienced before. His words were confusing to me, but I think his intent was cruel. He said he gave Elizabeth a bastard, and she helped by undressing herself to protect us--her sisters. I do not understand what that means, but all I could think was that he was very evil... and he hurt Lizzy."

"He was, Miss Lydia. What he did to your sister and was about to do to Sally was an act of unparalleled viciousness. I will explain privately to you what he meant about your sister. No one, absolutely no one else here should be told of his words to you. Who knew you were up here alone with him?"

"Sally… he had ripped her dress, so I told her to cover herself with Lizzy's shawl and go outside to find you and her brother. Wickham would have known I was alone with him, once Sally left. I told Sally what Lizzy told me about where to kick Wickham so she could get away." Lydia's eyes reflected a terror he had not seen before. "Colonel Fitzwilliam, will they hang me?"

He forced his reply to be as calm and as confidant as the situation would allow. "Not if I can help it, but we must both keep our wits about us. We must make sure no one beyond our closest allies knows you were here."

Richard was quiet for a few moments, thinking about what Lydia had related. He noticed her eyes were once again drifting toward his brother. Just in the nick of time, he was ready to communicate the first part of his plan. He spoke authoritatively. "Miss Lydia, go outside. Do not stop to talk to Lieutenant Wickham or Colonel Forster. Once outside, see if Miss Lucas, Colonel Bledsoe and Miss Bledsoe are still there. If they are, tell them I instruct them to walk very casually back to the Forsters' lodgings. There is no need to hurry. Perhaps, you might look in shop windows along the way. It is important to give the appearance to passersby that nothing untoward has happened."

He pulled her out of the chair and propelled her toward the door. "My hope is they are already on their way, and I am sure Ronald is doing everything he can to protect his sister from any public awareness that she was compromised." He smiled to bolster Lydia's confidence. "You were wise to give her the shawl." She reacted to his compliment with an attempt to smile herself. "If they are gone, you should make your way back in much the same way I described before. Once at the Forsters' do not discuss what happened with anyone… including Colonel Bledsoe and Miss Sally. Tell Colonel Bledsoe, for his sister's protection, no one should speak about what has happened. Stress to him how crucial it is that everyone wait to talk of these events. That is the only way we can ensure we are united in our stories."

He returned to his commanding officer's voice. "Repeat to me what you are to do." He was pleased that Lydia was much more alert now and listening closely to his instructions. She looked at the Colonel with respect and did, indeed, comprehend and accurately repeat his request.

Once she left, he began to think in earnest how he could keep this heroic young woman from paying the consequences for her action. The piece of information most crucial to this goal was to find out from Wickham the circumstances of Edmund's being in this house. Were there servants somewhere who would become aware of what had happened to the tenant? Was he the tenant, or just visiting?

Richard made his way downstairs, where he had left Colonel Forster holding Wickham at sword point. Wickham was trying to look arrogantly aloof, but the Colonel noticed fear in his childhood playmate's eyes. He had been caught procuring, and the young woman he brought to Edmund was in the guardianship of her brother, a distinguished colonel in the 1st Regiment of Foot--in the time of war.

Wickham was very worried about what was happening. Lord Wolfbridge had the protection of his title for his actions, but he was only the son of a steward, and his current place in society was as a lowly lieutenant. He should never have agreed to Edmund's demands, but the promise of three thousand pounds was too enticing, given his current circumstances. That money would have allowed him to resign the militia and depart for London, leaving his debts behind.

Richard's face was hard and demanding as he faced the lieutenant. "Wickham, I warn you, do not attempt to lie. Answering my questions truthfully is your only chance for any leniency in this situation. Procuring for my brother is a disreputable act, and Colonel Bledsoe is, probably right now, considering calling out both you and Edmund. My advice to him would be, to instead, involve the local constabulary. I believe debtor's prison would be a fitting place for you."

The apprehension in Wickham's eyes told Richard his words had hit the mark. "I am certain you have accumulated some debt since you have been in Brighton, not to mention obligations you have left in other places. Darcy has an investigator he can put on your case. We should have done something like that last year after the Ramsgate incident, but both of us were too generous. We will not be so this time. Both Darcy and I have an axe to grind with my brother, and unfortunately, you might be the one who pays the price for his depravity." Richard's eyes hardened as he fired several questions. "Why is Lord Wolfbridge here in Brighton? Whose house is this?"

Wickham wondered why Edmund was not answering these questions. He decided his friend had abandoned him to face the anger of the Colonel alone. He knew he must speak, and he tried to keep the fear out of his voice as he began, "Edmund leased the house from a friend in London. The gentleman uses it for assignations. An older couple live here and take care of the house. When we made plans for my bringing Miss Bledsoe here today, he gave them several days off, and they travelled to Lewes to visit their daughter and her new baby."

"Have you ever been to visit my brother when they were here? Have you met them?" Wickham nodded. This was the best of news, and Richard felt the muscles in his body relax slightly. His assurance of success in protecting Miss Lydia and Miss Sally increased significantly. His next demand took Wickham by surprise. "Give me your sword."

Wickham complied immediately; and convinced himself it was a measure to ensure he did not attempt to escape. Since they were two, and his commanding officer's sword was aimed at his gut, he had certainly never entertained the notion. Wickham looked at Colonel Forster with surprise when Richard returned upstairs with his weapon.

Upon re-entering the room, Richard moved quickly to the body. He plunged Wickham's sword into the wound caused by Miss Lydia's knife. He picked up the knife wrapped in the towel, tucked the package inside his jacket, and took one last look around the room before returning to Wickham and Colonel Forster. Wickham was so confused by what Richard was doing, that he did not notice the blood on the sword when it was replaced in his scabbard, and Colonel Fizwilliam grabbed his right arm. "Lawrence, put your sword away and take his other arm. We need to get him to whatever you have, that serves as a stockade, and we need to go there without attracting attention. Wickham, it is in your interest to cooperate. I plan to send for Darcy, and I think we can find a way to spare you debtor's prison."

Once back at the encampment, his first order of business was to send an express to Darcy. Richard knew his cousin had been called to Rosings by his aunt on what was probably invented estate business. This meant Darcy had been unable to travel to Derbyshire with Sir Gareth and Dr Wilder. He had, however, sent his family along with those two gentlemen. It was fortuitous Kent was such a short distance from Brighton.

The intent was to bring his cousin quickly so that they could make plans for removing Wickham from England. He relayed none of the particulars, but repeatedly told Darcy of the urgency of his request and mentioned several times, "The situation of which I write involves the reputations of Miss Elizabeth, Miss Lydia and Bethany."

Darcy arrived the following day and shortly after a conference with his cousin and the other colonels, left for London to secure the funds necessary for their plan. He returned in three days, and soon, he and Richard were in Southampton, escorting Wickham to a ship headed for Jamaica.

Wickham was soon aboard and reflecting on what had happened during the past fortnight. Darcy had handed over the first class ticket with little emotion. Richard had found it humorous that their childhood friend's trip would not be fraught with the same dangers as those who were transported faced. However, the Master of Pemberley was unable to hide his disgust as he had given the former lieutenant the three thousand pounds Edmund had promised him to act as procurer. The guarantee had also been made that his debts would be tracked down and paid, but both men had stressed that he should put all thoughts of returning to England out of his mind. Colonel Fitzwilliam had found numerous opportunities during the trip to remind Wickham that the weapon that had killed Lord Wolfbridge was his sword and he had been seen in company with Edmund in Brighton. These powerful men had the upper hand. He decided it was prudent to accept the life in the new world they offered. It was a much better alternative than the hangman's noose.

Elizabeth received a very fat letter from Mary, and was surprised when she opened it to have a message from Will sealed inside. She laughed at how relentless he was in finding ways to communicate with her. He had obviously persuaded her sister his message was of the utmost importance and beyond the bounds of needing to abide by proper behaviour. Mary was certain to have needed little convincing, as she and Georgiana were the two most indomitable supporters of a marriage between their two siblings.

Dearest Elizabeth,

See you in September, my love.
Will

Lizzy was almost overwhelmed by his words. She wanted to be in his arms, smell his scent, see his dimples and hear the deep rumble of his laugh. Her greatest temptation was to write to him and accept, but she knew it would be better saved until they were with each other again. The letter was folded and kept it in a pocket during her waking hours and under her pillow during sleep.

For close to a month, Elizabeth heard nothing from Will. There was not much news from Brighton either. Lydia had sent one very hurried note, proclaiming that she was so busy she did not have much time to write. She had thought her sister had improved in her thoughtfulness, but then she reminded herself that she was only fifteen. Charlotte sent a letter that seemed very evasive to her friend. Georgiana had written several times to inform her that Will was still not home. Elizabeth thought she could discern anxiety in her words, and she began to worry. Will had said he was wanted by Colonel Fitzwilliam. Her fears for all in Brighton became uppermost in her thoughts. If she were a man, she could travel there and determine what was happening.

Her time was filled with preparations for the three weddings, and at least that kept her from worrying constantly. Mrs Bennet did not allow, even her daughter who was not getting married, much leisure time to dwell on dark thoughts. Finally, in early June, Becky and Sir Walter had returned to Bath, with the promise they would return the middle of August. Mr Bingley had encouraged them to stay at Netherfield with him.

The first wedding would be John and Kitty on 9 September, followed by Rebecca Trent and Sir Gareth Hughes a week later on 17 September, and then finally Jane and Mr Bingley a fortnight later on the last day of September. Jane, Kitty and her mother had left the day before for London to stay with the Gardiners, and to buy wedding clothes. Mr Bingley had also left the neighbourhood for London, and John had gone to Derbyshire to plan for his family's trip in September. Lizzy and her father were quite alone. While the quiet was welcome, she found it gave her far too much time to brood about what was happening.

The following morning, she indulged in a walk to Oakham Mount at dawn, and read his letter as Caliban lay with his head in her lap. She tried to keep the desperation she felt at bay, but was unsuccessful. Finally, she decided to confide her fears to her father. When she arrived for breakfast, her father asked her to read a newspaper article his brother Gardiner had sent in a letter.

Lizzy first noticed that the piece was more than a se'nnight old. She began reading, but shortly her scream pierced the silence followed quickly by sobs. Her father's arms were soon around her in comfort. When she was composed, she communicated to her father that the Viscount Wolfbridge had been found murdered in Brighton. It was suspected that one George Wickham, who seemed to have vanished, had been the perpetrator.

"Oh, Papa, I do not know what to make of this. I fear for Mr Darcy. It is public knowledge he hit his cousin. What if they accuse him of this murder? I will not be able to bear it."

"Lizzy, I did not know you cared so for Mr Darcy. I thought, when he left Hertfordshire, you felt great animosity toward him." Mr Bennet gave his daughter a look of admonition. "His letter to me only told of your need to go to London and that you would stay with his sister. Mary's letter told of your panic at Jane's plight and assured me that Miss Darcy's companion was in residence. Your mother and I discussed both letters, and she thought there might be something more to the story. We decided to overlook the hint of impropriety at your staying at Darcy House. I expected if there was something I should know, you would tell me upon your return. "

Lizzy accepted her father's handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes. "It is true I was very angry with him when he left Netherfield, but then we met again in Kent, and as you know, he helped to reunite Jane with Mr Bingley. I owe him much gratitude."

Mr Bennet's look of disappointment was not lost on her. She shook her head in disgust. "Oh, why am I once again not telling you the entire truth? He proposed… I rejected him with great anger, but then we talked… I love him, but feel I am unable to marry him… he has vowed to pursue me until I agree. Papa, I need to know what is happening. I am worried about Lydia as well. Lord Wolfbridge was found dead in Brighton. What if he hurt her... and... ?" Lizzy started to sob again, and once again her father took her in his arms.

Mr Bennet was soon worrying almost as much as Elizabeth about Lydia's well being. While they discussed their fears, a carriage with the Darcy crest arrived at Longbourn. A muscular man with dark hair, wearing regimentals, a colonel, Mr. Bennet thought, was brought to the breakfast room by Mrs Hill. The man turned to Elizabeth and said, "You must be Miss Elizabeth. I am Colonel Bledsoe. If you will pardon us, I must speak to your father privately about a most urgent matter."

Her father and Colonel Bledsoe retired to his study and shut the door. Elizabeth was beside herself with anxiety, and resentful she was not allowed to know what Colonel Bledsoe was telling her father. The two men were together for over an hour. Finally her father opened the door and asked Lizzy to get Hill and return with her to his study. When they entered, he asked Mrs Hill to prepare his and Lizzy's things for a trip to London. He assured her they only needed clothes for three days at most. When the housekeeper left, he turned to Elizabeth and told her that Lydia was to marry Colonel Bledsoe in two days time. He instructed her to go with Hill and ensure the right types of clothes for the occasion were chosen.

Within four hours, the three were on their way to London. It was impossible to get Colonel Bledsoe or her father to engage in any meaningful conversation about the suddenness of this wedding. Any query was pushed aside, and the conversation was returned to mentions of the weather and the scenery. Finally she drifted into thoughts of Mr Darcy. She touched the letter in her pocket and wondered if she would see him. When they arrived, Colonel Bledsoe dropped them at Gracechurch Street and he continued on to Darcy House.

Darcy, Colonel Fitzwilliam, the Countess and Lady Eleanor had travelled to Derbyshire from London. A wagon had been sent ahead from Brighton with Edmund's body. The funeral took place the day after they arrived. Lady Eleanor was now almost six months into her confinement, but seemed to weather the journey without incident. She had never held a baby as long during any of the other times she had been with child.

When they arrived, the Earl had been livid and demanded his son and nephew explain how Edmund had come to be murdered. They told him the story of the leased house, and his being in the company of Wickham. Darcy had been in Kent with Lady Catherine, and Richard had not found out about his brother's death for several days. He did not know Edmund was in Brighton, and had learned the name of the victim when several constables came to question Colonel Forster about any of his men who might have been in the company of the Viscount Wolfbridge. The couple who took care of the house where Edmund had been staying had returned from Lewes to find the body… dead several days from what appeared to be a sword wound. They had informed the constables that the Viscount had been visited several times by a lieutenant from the militia. Colonel Forster informed the authorities that the only one of his men who he knew was acquainted with Lord Wolfbridge had gone missing. Richard assured his father that was all he knew. He had communicated with Darcy as soon as he heard the news, to take on the job of telling the rest of the family and to help with transporting the body while Richard was devoting his time to aiding the authorities in their investigation.

Several days after the funeral, the Colonel informed his family that his regiment was not being sent to Yorkshire, but instead was expected to return to Portugal or Spain. The demands of the Peninsular War could not excuse soldiers for bereavement leave for the entire mourning period. He had received permission to stay with his family at Elderton until Lady Eleanor gave birth. If the child was male, he would become the heir to Elderton and Richard would leave for war immediately. If the child was female, he would resign his commission and assume the title of the Viscount Wolfbridge.

Darcy stayed in Derbyshire only for the funeral. He informed Georgiana that he had unfinished business in London, and would return to Pemberley as soon as it was concluded. Two days after Edmund's funeral, he was once again on the road to London. He was exhausted from the strain of dealing with this calamity. Now that his cousin was dead, he hoped he could go forward with his life, and his greatest wish was that Elizabeth would realize that a major hurdle to their marriage was gone forever and agree to his proposal. He could almost taste the quiet, mundane routine he craved with her and their children at Pemberley.

Colonel Bledsoe and his sister, Sally, were at Darcy house per previous agreement upon his arrival in London. Miss Lydia was at her aunt and uncle's house. Colonel Bledsoe told Darcy of the love that had developed between him and Miss Lydia. His regiment was leaving for Canada within the week, as war with the United States was imminent, and there were rumours of a plan to invade and take over the Canadian territories. He requested Darcy's help in marrying Miss Lydia before his departure. He further confided that it was his plan to have Lydia and Sally sail to join him in Canada soon after the weddings in September. Once they were out of the country, Lydia would be safe from the threat of being charged with Lord Wolfbridge's murder. He and Lydia also thought it prudent to remove his sister from England. The scandal of her being compromised could not reach that far, if it ever came to light.

Darcy agreed to obtain a special license, and Colonel Bledsoe would travel the next day to Hertfordshire to ask permission of Mr Bennet. Lydia's father would be the only one to whom the full truth of what happened in Brighton would be revealed, as well as advance knowledge of their plans to emigrate to Canada. Mr Darcy made a special point to implore Colonel Bledsoe to urge Mr Bennet to withhold from Miss Elizabeth what had happened. Lydia had also been put under strict orders by Colonel Bledsoe to tell no one at Gracechurch Street of her impending wedding or to indicate anything unusual had happened in Brighton. He stressed to her, per the advice of both Colonel Fitzwilliam and Mr Darcy that her life and Sally's reputation depended on secrecy. The arrival of her father would be the time for disclosure of their wedding plans. He had assured his brave girl that in the event Mr Bennet refused, he would come and collect her, and they would travel to Gretna Green. Nothing would keep them apart, or from starting a new, exciting life in the wilds of Canada.

Lydia chose Elizabeth to stand-up with her, and she held her sister's hand tightly until the time came to give it to Ronald. Lizzy knew something was unusual about this wedding, but no one was forthcoming to reveal what it might be. The looks the couple exchanged convinced her it was a love match, but still that niggling doubt was ever present. Mr Darcy was there, but he seemed very subdued, as if the weight of the world was on his shoulders. His forced smile seemed filled with pain. What had happened in Brighton?

The only time they were able to talk was during the breakfast at the Gardiners after the ceremony. They sat next to each other, and she took his hand under the table. There seemed to be emotion in the squeeze he returned, but he remained silent with no words of any kind. This seemed at odds with the sentiments he had expressed in his last letter. It was true, the room was filled with well-wishers, and privacy was non-existent, but they could at least speak of things as though they were common acquaintances. Despite his silence, she knew mindless chatter was not what she craved and she asked very quietly, "Were you called away to Brighton because of the murder of Lord Wolfbridge?"

He seemed a bit startled that she knew, and his tone was evasive. "Yes, Richard needed help arranging for the transportation of Edmund's body."

For the duration of the breakfast, Elizabeth was only able to elicit a few responses from him, and nothing substantive about what happened. He seemed exhausted, and the aloof Mr Darcy was in attendance, as he told her of his plans to return to Pemberley. His family would go into mourning for his cousin. With a face that displayed no emotion, he told her of Richard's orders back to war, the anticipation of the birth of Lady Eleanor's baby and the cancellation of the midsummer picnic. He, Georgiana, Bethany and Lewis would, of course, travel to Hertfordshire for the three weddings, but would not be able to participate in any balls that were planned.

As he told her of his plans, Elizabeth became increasingly annoyed. Why did they have to observe mourning for that disgusting man? When he explained about not being able to attend any balls, her natural tendency to throw barbs like her father took control, and she said, "Well, it is lucky you do not plan to astound Hertfordshire, once again, by dancing a waltz with the well know recluse." She was immediately sorry when finally an emotion registered in his eyes, and it was despair.

She was encouraged when as they parted, he captured her eyes and smiled, and she saw a hint of dimples, as he whispered the now familiar refrain, "Until September, my love."

The residents of Hertfordshire remarked that they could not remember such a September… a September when the weather was glorious and the grass was still so green and the grain was so yellow. It was perfect for the weddings of three of its most beautiful and distinguished daughters of the county. The populace gave over the entire month to celebration.

The Derbyshire contingent arrived early in the month. Elizabeth wished she had time for long conversations with Mr Davies, Mrs Wilder, and Mrs Reynolds. She had missed all three, and letters had only scratched the surface of all that she wanted to know of their lives.

She particularly wished she were at liberty to speak candidly to Mrs Reynolds about accepting Will and becoming Mistress of Pemberley, but she was still entirely too conflicted to agree to his proposal. It would be very indiscreet to reveal his feelings for her and her misgivings to an employee. The murder of the Viscount had not smoothed the way for her acceptance, as it should. She was left with many questions, and those questions became excuses. Numerous letters had arrived from him over the summer, but his letters had been newsy, and never rose to the level of the great emotion he had displayed in May. Was he having second thoughts?

Elizabeth had confirmed with Georgiana that his birthday was September 8. Her Uncle Gardiner had been instructed to buy a book. She wanted to give him a first edition of the combined volumes of Songs of Innocence and of Experience with Blake's own illustrations. She knew from Georgiana that he did not own this work. The poetry of both volumes had given her comfort over the years, if for no other reason than it gave her an awareness that she was not alone in her remembered feelings of the joy of innocence and her despair at those things which had come with experience. She hoped he would love the poetry despite its reputation as containing the radical message of free love.

The day of his birthday, they had met at Oakham Mount. She stood on the Mount and waved as she saw him riding across the meadow. Once again, she was dressed in colours reminiscent of autumn, and the memory of seeing each other a year before came flooding back to both.

Once in each other's company, she was pleased that the reticence of June had lessened. This time she did not want to tempt fate by bringing up her questions about Edmund's death. It was his birthday, and she wanted it to be a happy time. She regaled him with humorous stories of her mother and Sir Walter preparing for the weddings, and her father, ever present in the background, reminding them of the cost of some of their ideas. Bethany and Lydia would be happy, as the duo had prevailed with the notion of having ice cream at all three wedding breakfasts. However, her father had put his foot down when it came to having white doves released as the couples left the chapel. He won Sir Walter over when he mentioned the possibility of clothes being ruined by a wayward dropping from one of the doves.

Will told Elizabeth of the birth of Eric Fitzwilliam, the new Viscount Wolfbridge. He had been born several weeks earlier than expected, but was still quite bonny, and not tiny at all. He smiled as he told her of his uncle's annoyance that Lady Eleanor had refused to name the baby Edmund. His aunt defended her daughter-in-law, and mentioned that there was a lot of gossip circulating about the circumstances surrounding Edmund's death. She put forward the idea that perhaps it was time to think of refurbishing the Fitzwilliam name, and this name that not one Fitzwilliam ancestor had ever carried was appropriate. Darcy gave her an enigmatic smile as he said, "Lady Eleanor calls the baby Ricky. I am to be his godfather, and Georgiana, his godmother. Richard was unable to accept the role, as he is off to Spain to join Wellington in Madrid this week, and who knows when he will return."

They chatted companionably until suddenly, Will seized her hand and without any preparation begged her to marry him. He said that now that Edmund was dead, there was no longer the need to fear his family. His uncle, despite being annoyed with the child's name, was putting all his hope for the future in his new heir. In the end, the Earl had agreed with Lady Cassandra, that the ancient name of Fitzwilliam must once again shine with honour in society. It would not do to risk exposing the circumstances of Bethany's birth. His uncle would also play a role in containing the machinations of Lady Catherine. Besides, she had no power, as Darcy was the actual owner of Rosings, and he could threaten her with eviction if she tried to make trouble.

"Allow me to ride to London between the weddings and obtain a special license. Perhaps we could have a double ceremony with Charles and Jane. The time is perfect for us to declare our love in front of family and friends. I am desperate for you to return to Pemberley with me. Please accept me."

Elizabeth was unprepared for this outburst of feelings. There had been a paucity of passion in his correspondence lately, and she had begun to think perhaps he had cooled in his desire for her. She thought they had the entire month to rebuild the intimacy they had developed and to find a solution for their love. She was so overcome that she took her hand back. The pain in his eyes, told her she must explain. What she did not realize, was that he ceased listening to her words at that gesture.

Darcy was overwhelmed with the belief that she would never agree. He did not hear as she explained her need for more time. She had to ensure the care of her parents. Who would help them deal with Lydia's departure for the Americas? There was no one to read to her father. Who would calm her mother now that Jane was gone?

They parted soon after, and she was only able to thrust the package at him and tell him she had bought him a book for his birthday, as he started his descent. She wished him a joyous day, but he did not even look back.

That night, Will sought the company of his sister. He told her what had happened, and once again, he cried openly in front of her. After his tears were spent, he said to his sister, "I gave her my heart, and she gave me a book."

Elizabeth was unsure what had happened, and spent a sleepless night trying to reconcile her feelings in the hopes of being able to answer his request with a positive reply. She was unsuccessful. The next day was the first wedding, and from that moment on, the month flew by with hardly a moment for reflection. They were cordial in the other's presence, but there was no evidence of his avowed relentless pursuit.

More of her time was spent with the children. She became the official entertainer of those under twelve at the wedding festivities. Bethany and Lewis were joined by Sian. David, Marianne and Susan were often part of her audience, as were Charlotte's three--William, Lawrence, and her goddaughter Betsy. The best seat in the house to the smaller ones was Lizzy's lap. Lewis thought it his right, but he was forced to share with Susan, Sian and Betsy.

For the first time, Elizabeth saw a bit of Edmund in Bethany. Not his character, but his appearance. She was much taller than Lizzy had been at that age, and her facial features were becoming strikingly different. She had what she had heard referred to by Lady Catherine, the Fitzwilliam nose. An aristocratic nose… straight and perfectly shaped… not too large and not too small. Elizabeth wondered what her adult teeth would be like. Would she have that dazzling smile? And if she did, would she use if for good or evil? A few had remarked that her hair and eyes reminded them of Elizabeth, but in general, those comments did not happen as often as she had feared.

The end of September brought the last wedding, and the guests began their departures for London, Bath and Derbyshire. Will had tried to smile and express confidence they would see each other soon, but she could tell his heart was not in the sentiment.

The children sobbed at the thought of leaving her. Lewis clung to her skirts, and both begged her to return with them to Derbyshire. By the time of their departure, all were emotionally spent. Their waving good bye had been frenetic. Darcy, on the other hand, turned his face to the opposite window so she and his children would not see his grief.

Chapter 51 – The Pursuit of Love in a Cold Climate in the Time of Measles

Longbourn was strangely silent after the frantic pace leading up to the weddings. Jane and Charles had gone to Bath for their honeymoon. Sir Walter had told them of all the most fashionable places. Charles promised Jane that once Napoleon was defeated, he would take her to Grasse, to observe them making perfume, and then on to the Cote d'Azur. Becky had gone directly to Derbyshire after Jane's wedding, with stops at Inns along the way. Sian was with Mr Darcy, and would stay at Pemberley for the first month of the Hughes' marriage. Kitty and John had spent the weeks waiting to attend the other marriages in their new home, and then they also had travelled to Derbyshire so she could sketch the peaks and get the oft-promised peek at Pemberley.

Elizabeth made the most of her last remaining time with Lydia. Sally seemed a good friend for her sister. She was glad she would have female companionship while Colonel Bledsoe was busy with this new front, on what seemed like endless war. Lydia seemed changed since Brighton. Of course, she was married, but somehow the maturity she displayed and a certain seriousness she had developed seemed sudden in its appearance. What Lizzy observed was not at all sadness, and Lydia showed a great deal of excitement about embarking on her new life. Elizabeth observed that Sally often seemed to want to speak of something in Lizzy's presence, but Lydia would look at her in such a way that caused her to cease.

Will was relieved to be back in Derbyshire. A familiar daily routine would dull the pain of failure. As he was resettling into his room and his man was unpacking for him, he realized he had never opened the package containing the book she had given him for his birthday.

He sat in his favourite reading chair by the fire to open it. It was a book of poetry he had never read but had heard much about--Songs of Innocence and of Experience by William Blake. It appeared to be a first edition, and was illustrated by the poet. A single sheet of paper fell from inside the volume.

Dearest Will,

Your Elizabeth

Once again he did what was becoming a common practice with him. He cried. He had indeed acted precipitously that day. He had squandered practically a whole month in her company not doing what he had promised--relentlessly pursuing her. She threw one little barb, as she had promised she would, and he crumbled. Richard was right… one shot and he surrendered.

He thought of writing her, but he was not sure she would welcome his words after what he had done. He broke the eleventh commandment. In his lack of confidence, he sat idly by.

Two days before they were all to journey to Southampton for Lydia and Sally's departure, her sister asked to speak to Lizzy alone. The weather was fine, so they walked to Oakham Mount. Once they were away from the house, Lydia began. "Lizzy, what I am about to speak of, I was cautioned by Ronald, Mr Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam never to reveal--even to you. I know Bethany is your daughter. I found out when Colonel Fitzwilliam explained the meaning of some words I heard the Viscount Wolfbridge speak." Lydia stopped and grasped her sister's hands. "He told me he had given you a bastard, and that you had undressed yourself to protect your sisters. I heard those words just before I murdered him with your silver dagger."

Lizzy looked at her sister in horror, but her horror was soon replaced by the tug of a hesitant smile, and perhaps a look of contentment and closure. Lydia was leaving England in two days time. The law would never be able to reach her. She knew it was wrong to condone murder, but somehow, even before Lydia told her about Sally, she knew his execution was justice served.

The sisters spent hours sitting on the hill overlooking the beauty of Hertfordshire and telling each other their tales. Lizzy asked permission to talk to Sally and help her accept any feelings of guilt she might have with regards her behaviour. Lydia was unsure why she would feel guilty… she had not murdered anyone, but Lizzy assured her sister that she was certain Sally was carrying around feelings of remorse for following Wickham and entering that house with him. Lydia thought over her sister's remarks and realized that she made a great deal of sense. Lydia had been so wrapped up in her own fear, and even some guilt, that she had not realized what the incident might have done to Sally.

Before the two left the mount, Lydia brought up one more topic she had been contemplating. "Lizzy, I think the love Mr Darcy feels for you is greater than any I have ever observed. He bought the tickets for Sally and me, and he added five thousand pounds to the ten thousand pound dowry you set aside for me. Uncle Gardiner told me of the arrangements."

Lydia took her sister's hands again as she added, "I have heard rumours that he asked you to marry him several times, and you have yet to accept. Lizzy, Lord Wolfbridge is dead, Bethany is your daughter, and Lewis adores you. Mr Darcy's face, when he thinks you will not observe him, overflows with love, and then seems to become clouded with sadness. Open your heart and let that love flow to you. It is time to grasp the moment and let your new life start."

"Lydia, I am afraid to physically be a wife to him."

"Oh, Lizzy, I only had a few nights with Ronald, but I know that whatever you experienced at the hands of Lord Wolfbridge has nothing to do with what two people who love each other do. I found making love wonderful. The closeness, the sharing, is beyond my powers to describe. That is what you will be doing… making love. The Viscount was making hate. The two have nothing in common."

That night at bedtime, Elizabeth had her talk with Sally. The young woman seemed very appreciative of an ear to confess her guilt. Elizabeth had begun by telling her the story of her encounter with the Viscount. Sally could not understand why Elizabeth would feel guilt since she had been trapped, and Elizabeth praised Sally for screaming and told of her sometimes regret when she thought how she had not struggled. Sally hugged her new sister, and thanked her for the opportunity to share her feelings. She told Sally just before she went to her own room, her face wreathed with the pleasure the memory gave her, of the words a very good man had once said to her, "Enough of your guilt!"

The trip to Southampton was without incident, and the goodbyes were bittersweet. In the carriage returning to Longbourn, Elizabeth told her mother both about her rape, and that Bethany was the result of that encounter. Her mother surprised her by telling her that Mr. Bennet had told her the whole story shortly after the ball at Netherfield. She was amazed that her mother had shown such restraint and had never once even hinted that she knew her daughter's secret. She smiled at her daughter and said, "My granddaughter is lovely. I would have seen the resemblance and told you of it, had I not already known. She has your eyes and hair, but she is much taller and her nose is exquisite. You can tell she has blood from the highest echelons of society."

Elizabeth and her father laughed, and Mr. Bennet said, "Fanny, I am happy to know I can always count on you remaining the lovely, silly girl I married. But, remember my love, you can never reveal to the married ladies in Meryton that you have a granddaughter whose aristocratic nose is due to her father being a viscount."

"Oh, Thomas, of course not. You, of all people, know I am not really that silly. Besides, it would not be very enjoyable speaking of the depravity of that gentleman, and then being forced to reveal how my daughter, who has gone to America, revenged her sister by murdering him."

Mr Bennet's face was very stern as he said, "Fanny, Lizzy does not know about that."

"Oh, yes she does. Lydia told me she planned to disobey all those men, and tell Lizzy before she left. I encouraged her, because I would want to know if my sister had done that for me."

Mr Bennet looked at Lizzy, and she nodded in agreement with Mrs Bennet just before the two hugged each other.

Once she was out of her daughter's embrace, Mrs Bennet looked at her only unmarried daughter candidly and said, "Lizzy, I think it high time you accept Mr Darcy. That way I can claim my granddaughter as my own without having to reveal our secret. I like that little Lewis as well. His birth bodes well for Mr Darcy giving you sons, and of course it would be a constant source of gratification for me to describe to my friends the beauty of Pemberley."

Lizzy did not dwell on the thought of Mr Darcy giving her sons, and instead answered the intent of her mother's statement. "Mama, I think it will be very soon, but I am not certain how to communicate my feelings to him."

Mr Bennet raised an eyebrow and said, "Elizabeth, do you think I was born yesterday? I know you and Mr Darcy have been writing to one another, just as you and Dr Wilder have been corresponding for years. You can either include a letter inside one to Miss Darcy as usual, or I could have you write one to him for me; and when I am not looking, you can include a second missive from yourself."

Elizabeth laughed at both her parents. "This has certainly been a journey of truth. Are there any secrets the two of you would like to confess to me?"

Mr and Mrs Bennet looked at each other and smirked.

Lizzy waited a fortnight for Mr Darcy to communicate. His failure to write pushed forward the realization that she would have to set them back on the path to marriage. Her mission was delayed when Jane and Kitty came back from Bath and Derbyshire, and she was obligated to hear all their news. A week after they returned, she once again took up the task of writing him a letter. Another week was wasted looking for just the right words to convey her feelings. She did her best thinking at Oakham Mount, but it was an unusually cold November that precluded her walks. Luckily they had not had snow, but only low temperatures and biting wind. Would she be able to come up with words that did not offend? She was in her room with pen in hand when she spied an express rider through her window.

Curiosity caused her to once again delay her letter. She arrived downstairs and took the express from Mrs Hill with the intention of reading it to her father. However, she noticed that it was addressed to her and was from Georgiana. She tore the letter open and read with increasing horror.

Pemberley, Derbyshire
15 November, 1812

Love,
Georgiana

Lizzy cried for her parents in a most unladylike way. "Papa, Mama, come here at once. I must talk to you. I must leave for Derbyshire immediately."

Her parents were by her side in seconds. She read the letter out loud to them with tears stinging her eyes. Her mother pulled her daughter into an embrace and starting stroking her back, all the while whispering, "They will get well, do not worry, they will be all right. You had the measles, and you survived; and look how healthy you are today." Once she ran out of words to say, she crooned lovingly to her daughter, just as she had when she was a baby."

Her father had used those seconds when his wife was comforting her daughter to put a plan in place. "Sir Walter is in London preparing to travel to Derbyshire for Christmas. He is having some new clothes made. I believe his excuse for the expense is due to the colder winters in Derbyshire."

Mr Bennet saw that his daughter was not amused by his humour so he quickly returned to the topic at hand. "I will send an express to him in London, and inform him you will be joining him on his journey. You must go today. As I remember, he wrote me he was planning to leave on the 18th. That is tomorrow. Get yourself ready, and I will order the carriage to take you to London. He is staying with Lord and Lady Hastings. I will have your mother write out the address for the coachman."

"Papa, that is an excellent plan, and I appreciate your support. Both of you must understand something. I am going to Derbyshire, but I am not coming home. If Mr Darcy will still have me, we will marry." The tears started to flow again. "I fear he might have given up on me. How will I ever forgive myself if my indecisiveness causes me to be too late? I thought I could always count on all of them being there for me when I was ready. What if I was wrong?"

Mrs Bennet wrote the note to Sir Walter at her husband's dictation, and Mr Reynolds was called to arrange for its rapid delivery. Once the messenger was on his way, John sent a note to Netherfield requesting Jane and Charles come quickly. He then went to collect Kitty from their home, and all gathered to see Elizabeth off. Her family hugged her, shed tears of both sadness and joy, promised to write often, and visit whenever possible. Mrs Bennet assured her daughter, she would enjoy reading to Mr Bennet. All did their best to convince Lizzy that the children would recover. Within two hours of receiving Georgiana's letter, she left Longbourn to a chorus of loved ones wishing her happiness.

Elizabeth arrived at Lord and Lady Hastings' house by four in the afternoon. Lady Hastings embraced Elizabeth, and the first words out of her mouth were, "I remember when you had measles. All of Hertfordshire feared you would die. Your little ones will survive, just as you did. Come in and freshen yourself, I have a delicious dinner planned. A meal and a good night's rest will prepare you for your journey. I will make sure Walter does not dawdle tomorrow morning. As his older sister, I have had much practice lighting a fire under him over the years."

Lizzy was struck by the fact that Lady Isabelle called Bethany and Lewis "your little ones." Maybe she had heard rumours of Mr Darcy offering for her. Elizabeth hoped she knew nothing more but was too focused on travelling to Derbyshire to really care.

Lady Isabelle was good to her word. She made sure they were on the road early. Luckily, Lizzy had brought so little, because Sir Walter had loaded the huge leased carriage down with boxes. He assured her much of his luggage contained presents for Christmas, but she suspected most contained his clothes. One present for Sian, sat in the carriage as if another passenger. It was a huge French doll… almost as tall as Sian. She was exquisitely dressed in pink silk, and had beautiful blond curls and blue eyes. Elizabeth smiled when she realized the doll looked a lot like her older sister when she was a little girl. Jane had always been Sir Walter's idea of physical perfection. Poor Sian, would she realize her new grandpapa preferred angelic blond girls to lively redheads. Elizabeth hoped she would not lose confidence in her appearance. Her next thought brought tears to her eyes. Sian and Lewis had promised themselves to each other, practically in their cradles, and she remembered he thought her the most beautiful little girl.

Sir Walter knew Elizabeth was anxious, and tried to accommodate her by taking fewer rest stops. He also rose early each morning so he could make absolutely certain he looked impeccable but would not delay their departure.

Elizabeth reminded herself to tell Becky how accommodating her father had been. He had confessed to Lizzy that he was quite enjoying accompanying her on this journey to find true happiness and was pleased he could be part of the effort to save the poor, sick children. Elizabeth had then been treated to a half hour's worth of diversion as he explained how his true nature was that of a romantic, but societal demands had forced him to be more practical. In the interest of diplomacy and good will, she refrained from laughing.

At every stop, Elizabeth asked about the road conditions on the next leg of the journey. She was afraid it would snow, and they would be delayed. Sir Walter reminded her often that constantly looking at the sky would not protect them from the vagaries of November weather. Elizabeth acknowledged the truth in his statement and spent an inordinate amount of time praying for blue skies. "God, grant me blue skies… blue skies from now on," was the refrain she repeated under her breath.

Finally they were in Derbyshire, and the terrain started to become more recognizable. The driver told them at their last rest stop that they would arrive at Bryn Mawr in three hours. Since they left that stop, Elizabeth had asked Sir Walter the time every ten minutes. He had a beautiful pocket watch that had belonged to his father, and it was a great source of vanity for him. Lizzy knew he liked taking it out and looking at it, so she reasoned she was performing an act of kindness with each request for the time. According to the last time she asked, they had only thirty minutes left until their arrival.

Just as she was thinking of asking for the time again, she looked out the window, at a passing curricle and saw Jamie driving. He appeared to be going in the direction of Pemberley. Luckily Sir Walter had leased the latest and most fashionable in carriages, with windows that opened and closed. Elizabeth opened the window, leaned out as far as she could, knocking her bonnet back in the process, and screamed like a banshee… "Jamieeeeee!" The wind was blowing in the right direction and carried the sound of her wail. Jamie looked around, and saw Elizabeth hanging out the window of the carriage he had just passed. He pulled up the horse and waited for the carriage to catch up to him.

When the carriage stopped, Elizabeth jumped out. She demanded of her friend, "Take me to Pemberley!" She quickly thanked her companion for all his assistance.

Sir Walter looked perplexed at her behaviour and said, "You are leaving your luggage. What will you wear?"

Elizabeth snorted at his concern, but then reverted to politeness as she told him, "Do not worry about my box… someone will come to Bryn Mawr tomorrow to collect it." She literally jumped into the curricle, and they were off.

The coachman and Sir Walter looked at each other and said in chorus, "Crazy girl."

Will was waiting for Dr Wilder and saw the curricle coming up the drive from the window of his study. He saw someone with him and thought it looked like a woman… a rather petite woman… her bonnet knocked from her head and hanging down her back… curls blazing in the sun and flying in all directions. He ran to the door and stood waiting outside for their arrival. She saw him and completely forgot that he might have redeveloped misgivings. Jumping from the curricle, she ran to him. He took her in his arms, and she whispered into his ear, "I will."

Posted on: 2011-02-05

Chapter 52 – Bridge over Troubled Water

A rush of euphoria seized Fitzwilliam Darcy. as she raced up the steps toward him. These last few weeks with his children sick, he had hardly been able to think coherently--much less put a plan in place to renew his relentless pursuit--and now here she was. Throwing caution to the wind, he crushed her to him. Dr Wilder caught his eyes and gave him a knowing smile. With a tip of his head, the physician continued on up the steps to attend the children. Darcy heard her whisper the words he had been hoping to hear for months. Pulling away to gauge her sincerity, a glimpse of the pink of her tongue caused him to abandon all proper behaviour. He sealed their betrothal with a kiss--filled with both his dread that this moment would never come, and his almost uncontrollable delight that it had.

When Will released her slightly, Elizabeth opened her mouth to speak. Before any words escaped, he kissed her hard. Like her sister Jane before her, she did not know how to respond. Only rarely had she even considered the possibility of ever kissing a man. She stood motionless, lost in her evaluation of the experience.

Her lack of response caused him to pull back and apologize. "I am sorry, Lizzy, I should not have done that."

She returned his fear ridden gaze with a thoughtful look. "No, please, I do not object, and I promise I will improve if you are patient."

A dimpled smile replaced his anxiety. "I will be patient, my love. Now that I have your heart, I will never let it go." He watched as her eyes filled with light at his words.

She marvelled that he remembered her words; but then awareness dawned that she had another mission. Her face became serious. "Take me to them."

"Bethany is much improved, and Dr Wilder assures me she is out of danger. Darcy looked around to ensure they had privacy before he continued with his thought. "He told me he believes she is doing better than Lewis because you were healthier than Anne, and she has benefited."

They climbed the stairs, her hand on his arm, both occasionally stealing glances at the other and offering shy smiles. Neither even gave a thought that a servant might see their open affection. The content of their struggle to arrive at this moment took precedence in importance to any rigid forms of propriety.

Dr Wilder was just leaving Bethany when she arrived. She was sitting up in bed, and her face broke into a broad grin at the sight of Lizzy. Elizabeth noticed that both her front teeth were missing. She could not help but grin back at the sight of her toothless daughter who still had a few red spots visible on her face and neck.

Oh, Miss Lizzy, I have missed you so. Of course it came out sounding like 'Mith Lithy' and 'mithed you' and Elizabeth's grin widened.

"Dr Wilder brought some of those Madeleine cakes."

Lizzy realized she was hungry and asked Bethany. "Do you plan to share?"

"Yeth, but only with you." Dr Jamie told me that you love them too."

"Have you been discussing me?"

"Yeth, he told me Aunt Georgie had written, and you had come. Are you going to stay?"

"Yes, I am. Does that meet with your approval?"

"Yeth! Are you going to marry Papa?"

Bethany held her arms out and Elizabeth sat down on the edge of the bed, slipped into her embrace and hugged her tight "Once again, yes, I am. Does that meet with your approval?"

"Yeth, but you should already be my mama. I told him to marry you when he came to Rosings… especially after you stopped wearing those 'thpectacles' and your hair was not flat." Bethany looked petulantly at Lizzy. "I do not know what he was waiting for."

Lizzy could not help smiling, despite the seriousness of the topic. Her daughter's lisp… combined with a determination to blame her father for his procrastination was entirely too humorous for her to keep a completely straight face. "Bethany, I think the fault was mine. I was confused about things."

Bethany seemed to think about Lizzy's revelation, and then perked up. "I am glad you are no longer 'confuthed.'

They made plans to have tea and cakes together in the afternoon. Lizzy excused herself and told Bethany she wanted to see Lewis.

Lewis was sleeping fitfully, and perhaps dreaming. Lizzy heard him mumble incoherently and caught the words 'must save' and 'trying' as she observed the little boy thrash about. Jamie told her he had not been awake and alert for several days, and seemed to be dreaming quite often. He also told her that the most important thing to be done was bathing his body with cold compresses. Elizabeth decided to take a turn before she returned to Bethany's room. He was so warm, and Elizabeth prayed for his recovery as she tried to cool him down. His failure to recover would crush her.

Mrs Reynolds learned that Elizabeth had eaten nothing except a very small breakfast. She made certain the tea she served to Bethany and Lizzy included cold meat, cheese as well as broth. Her trip had been tiring, and she should have sustenance to keep up her strength. The last thing Pemberley, her master and his children needed was for Elizabeth to become ill.

After tea, Lizzy returned to Lewis' room. She relieved Millie and told her she would stay with the little boy until supper. He was sleeping more comfortably, but still occasionally mumbled what sounded like, "I am trying" before drifting back into slumber. Lew had thrown off the coverlet. Rather than pulling the covers back over him, Lizzy removed her shoes and stockings and got into bed nestling him into the curve of her body. The warmth of his body combined with fatigue caused by days of travelling and a full stomach lulled her into a deep sleep.

Fitzwilliam Darcy entered his son's room to inform Elizabeth it was time to prepare for dinner. What he saw made him realize how much he had gained today. His son lay with his head at her breast. A momentary twinge of envy was replaced by silent laughter at his immature emotion. It was then that he noticed her bare feet, and he concluded he was being rewarded for reproving himself. Dinner could wait. He took a chair by the bed and indulged in watching them sleep. It was not long before she stirred and opened her eyes. He was greeted by a startled expression.

Lizzy awoke to see a pair of dark eyes staring at her. Her disorientation as to time and place was soon edged aside by the awareness that Lewis was sleeping with his nose pressed against her bosom. A touch to the little boy's brow told her he seemed significantly cooler. She smiled and nodded at Will, and he released the full glory of his dimples in response.

Just as Darcy was about to speak to her, Lew opened his eyes. Seconds later, the little boy lifted his head to look directly into Lizzy's eyes. He greeted her with a similar set of dimples, and proclaimed, "I saved you."

"What did you save me from, Lew dearest?"

"A bad man"

"Who was the bad man?"

"He looked like Papa, but he had teeth like the big bad wolf. Papa does not have teeth like that, and Papa is nice. I got on Little John and tried to save you."

Lizzy was momentarily confused. She knew John Reynolds had visited Pemberley, and she wondered whether the gentle giant had given Lewis a ride on his shoulders. Suddenly she remembered his drawing, and realized Little John was his pony. He had dreamed of being a knight and saving her from someone who sounded a great deal like Lord Wolfbridge. This time she kissed his head and again was struck by how much cooler he felt.

"Will, is Dr Wilder still here? I think his fever might have broken."

Dr Wilder was summoned, and he concurred that Lewis' temperature was down.

Bethany was allowed out of bed the following day, and a week later, Lewis joined his sister in the nursery for a daily story from Miss Lizzy.

As soon as his son was out of danger, Will left for Hertfordshire and London. His journey's mission was to acquire Mr Bennet's official approval and arrange for the settlement documents. They had argued over her request to make her other financial assets part of the contract. Elizabeth still had funds invested with Mr Gardiner from the compensation she had negotiated years ago. Even after all the disbursements to her sisters and the monies set aside for her mother, there was still a significant amount. Darcy refused to have it included, because he felt it to be totally outside the normal sources that made up marriage agreements. Lizzy felt the amount should become her dowry, but Will steadfastly disagreed. He remembered the negotiations, and knew that was her money… money she had paid a heavy price for. He thought it wrong to be part of their new life.

Darcy and Elizabeth hoped to wed as soon as possible after he returned. The banns had been read the day following her arrival on Sunday, 22 November. That meant they could wed any day after 6 December. Before he left, they discussed possible dates with Mrs Reynolds, and all agreed the best day was Thursday, the 10th of December. The significance of the commemoration was not lost on any of the three. Elizabeth agreed to be the one to ask Bethany whether she objected to sharing her birthday with the wedding festivities.

Before he left, there had been several conferences in his study making plans for their wedding. Being there allowed Elizabeth to observe the painting he had mentioned in his letter. One look and Elizabeth was flooded with thoughts of that time when she was as young as the girl in the portrait. Mostly it brought to mind her last visit to Pemberley as she waited for Bethany's birth. Will had written that he saw her as this young woman--concentrating on her book and glowing. She supposed there had been moments like that, but the only thing she could recall was the anguish she had felt as she walked away from her daughter and all the things she had missed. With time, she hoped she would develop new memories, happy memories of this house and her daughter--just as she had begun to do at Darcy House.

Her demeanour had been nothing like that serene young woman in the painting during another private meeting they had in his study. She had not requested time alone with him to say her piece that first day--there had been more important things to accomplish. Her second day at Pemberley had been soon enough to raise her concerns. A smile tugged at her lips as she recalled his look of anxiety as she had begun raising her disapproval of the decision to keep her from learning the circumstances of Lord Wolfbridge's death. With a chuckle she wondered whether he feared she might take back her acceptance. Darcy had at first defended his action; but as he listened to all the confusion and apprehension she had experienced after reading the newspaper report of the Viscount's murder, he had capitulated. Elizabeth had verbally applauded her sister for disobeying the ban on telling, and Will had seemed particularly attentive when she spoke of how learning all the details had allowed her to forgive his aloof manner during Lydia's wedding. His explanation that in the heat of the moment, he had gone along with Colonel Fitzwilliam's plan without thinking how unfair it was to her had seemed plausible. The best was that the conference had ended with another comforting embrace, and his whispered promise that their marriage would be characterized by complete honesty.

Elizabeth found Bethany in the nursery, drawing a picture of sheep grazing in a pasture. It was quite good for someone her age. "Bethany, your drawing is lovely, and the sheep and lambs look so real."

"Thank you. Mrs Kitty taught me, and she can draw all sorts of things… even Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf."

Kitty had also given Bethany a basic lesson in perspective and explained that if she put larger sheep in the bottom of the picture, middle-sized sheep in the middle of the picture and smaller sheep toward the top of the page, it would make the picture look as though the viewer could see into the distance. She had been practicing ever since Kitty and John had left more than a month ago.

"Mrs Kitty also loved the pictures on the walls. She said you had told her about them. Were you here before?"

Elizabeth answered very cautiously. "Yes, once, many years ago."

"Did you meet my Mama?"

"I did, and I promise I will tell you all about her soon, but right now I need to ask you a very important question. Would you mind if I married your Papa on your birthday?"

"Would I still get presents?"

"Of course you would."

Bethany smiled broadly as she exclaimed, "I do so love presents, but I want you and Papa to marry very soon. Then you can give me a sister as a present."

"Why do you say that?"

"Aunt Georgie said that first a man and a woman marry, and then the woman has a baby. I want a sister. Lewis wants both a sister and a brother. When is your birthday?"

Lizzy realized Bethany's understanding at six was the same as hers had been at fifteen. "My birthday is also December 10th."

Bethany's smile changed to amazement. "Oh, my goodness, we have the same birthday, and I think we have the same name. My name is Elizabeth Anne. What is yours?"

Elizabeth was a bit concerned with the direction of the conversation, but answered truthfully. "You are correct. Mine is also Elizabeth Anne."

"That is some kind of sign. We were born on the same day. We have the same name. I think God must have planned for you to be my Mama, once he took my real Mama away."

Feelings of loss threatened to overwhelm Elizabeth, but she controlled her emotions and smiled sweetly instead. "You may be right, Bethany."

It was agreed that they would serve all of Bethany's favourite foods at the celebration after the wedding and the event would be her birthday party as well as a wedding breakfast. Those invited would be family and their closest friends in Derbyshire. An express was sent to Charles and Jane as soon as the date was decided. They were encouraged to return to Pemberley with Mr Darcy, and Lizzy suggested they stay through Twelfth Night and Lewis and Sian's birthdays. She asked Becky to send a similar letter of encouragement to Jane to spend the entire holiday season with her sister and her best friend. Elizabeth knew the rest of her family would be unable to attend, but she wrote to inform them of the recovery of the children and that the wedding would take place on December 10th.

As Elizabeth and Mrs Reynolds discussed having ice cream for the birthday girl, Lizzy was threatened by tears. Lydia's face, wreathed with delight at the thought of the treat, had triggered her sadness She realized how different her wedding was from those of other young women and was saddened by the awareness that so many would be unable to attend. Colonel Fitzwilliam and Colonel Bledsoe, along with her youngest sister were gone from the country.

Thinking of her sister forced Elizabeth to acknowledge that Richard's reason for secrecy had been prudent. He had wanted to minimize talk of an alternate theory of Edmund's death. The three colonels had calculated that the honour of serving his country valiantly would allow Colonel Bledsoe and his family to return to England one day. The hope was that time and the ton's attention focussed elsewhere would make it safe for Lydia. In that moment, Elizabeth forgave Colonel Fitzwilliam for his keeping her in the dark until her sister broke his ban.

Mr and Mrs Collins would also miss their day, but the reason was happier than Lydia's circumstances. Their son, William Andrew's birth on 3 November made their presence impossible. Lizzy promised in her letter to them that the Darcy family would continue the tradition of spending Easter in Kent. All would arrive early enough to see Mr Collins' grape hyacinths spell out names each spring. Elizabeth had also warned Mary to expect the wrath of Lady Catherine, as Will had written to her at the same time Lizzy had written their letter.

Lady Catherine, upon being informed of the nuptials, wrote back a very short and dismissive letter, threatening to break off all relations. Darcy did not receive her correspondence until he had returned to Pemberley from Hertfordshire. He was amused that she seemed to forget that she lived at Rosings because of his benevolence and that she had orchestrated her dependency. Her husband, Sir Lewis De Bourgh, had quickly grown tired of his wife. Despite Lady Catherine's great beauty and impeccable connections, he soon became tired of her supercilious attitude. At the time of his death, he left her a small annuity, and the rest of his estate was put in trust for his daughter. Upon Anne's marriage, everything Sir Lewis left his daughter became her husband's property. Though it had been Lady Catherine's wish that her daughter should marry her sister's son and accomplish the joining of the two estates, she had never acknowledged her subservience to him. Darcy wondered why she had not had a similar obsession with Anne marrying Edmund. Had she known how poorly managed Elderton was, or had she determined Darcy to be the more pliable of the two? He wrote back an equally short and dismissive letter, threatening her with eviction if she exhibited rudeness to his wife or her relations in the future. He further stated that he assumed she would not be attending the wedding, but did assure her she was invited… provided it was within her power to act with civility.

Will had contemplated making a trip to Rosings to make his position clear to Lady Catherine in person. He had envisioned himself going toe to toe with her as Elizabeth had, but more than anything he had wanted to be reunited with his family. Elizabeth, Bethany and Lewis had been waiting on the steps when his carriage had pulled up in front of the house. She had greeted him, Charles and Jane warmly, and then she had spied Caliban. His thoughtful gesture had obviously been a complete surprise to her, and the dog received even more affection than either he or her sister had been given. As a way of expressing his jealousy, Darcy felt compelled to warn her that pets at Pemberley were not allowed to sleep in their owner's bedchamber. Lizzy and his sister had not noticed that the mirror in the entrance hall had allowed him to see their rolled eyes and smirks when they thought his back was turned.

Darcy was surprised to find a note from his uncle stating that he, his wife, and his daughter-in-law would attend. Lady Cassandra, Lady Eleanor and the baby would arrive on the 8th, and return to Elderton immediately after the wedding breakfast. In deference to his mourning for his son, the Earl of Elderton would only attend the ceremony. The ladies, who were also observing a year of mourning for Edmund, believed a quiet few days at Pemberley, becoming acquainted with their new relative, was not a violation of the restrictions dictated by the period of bereavement. Darcy read between the lines to discern a dispute between the ladies of Elderton and the Earl, and it appeared the ladies had been victorious.

The evening that Lady Cassandra and Lady Eleanor arrived for their visit, a dinner was held for their closest friends. Dr Wilder, Mrs Wilder, Mr Davies, Mr and Mrs Hinton, Sir Gareth and the new Lady Hughes, and Sir Walter all came to celebrate with the engaged couple. The camaraderie was reminiscent of the dinners at Darcy house the previous spring. The two main topics of conversation were the progress with Dr Wilder's quest to establish a hospital in Derbyshire, and the movement to abolish slavery. Dr Wilder did most of the talking on both subjects, but found a strong ally on both topics in Lady Eleanor. Widowhood, or was it motherhood, had released her repressed irreverent wit.

Elizabeth visited the nursery that evening to look in on Bethany's brother. His mother was cradling her son and crooning Rock a bye Baby.

After she put Ricky in his cradle, she smiled at Elizabeth. "I have wanted him for such a long time. I came to believe that a child was the only thing that could make my marriage bearable."

"I am very happy for you, and of course the birth of Eric creates a bond between you and me that must remain secret, but I think it appropriate we speak of the circumstances." Elizabeth watched Eleanor's reaction, trying to discern whether she knew the facts of Bethany's birth, as she suspected.

"We do indeed have a bond, but it is not the one of which you speak."

"Which one do you believe I mean?"

"You think Eric is Bethany's brother, but he is not. The bond you and I share is that Edmund Fitzwilliam, the Viscount Wolfbridge, treated us both cruelly. Richard is Eric's father. You and I both have a secret we must keep, but the relevant facts are quite the opposite. You must keep secret that Edmund is Bethany's father and you her mother, and I must keep secret that Edmund is not Eric's father. Are you shocked by my depravity?"

"I am not. Will has told me of your love for Richard and that it preceded your meeting Edmund."

Eleanor's face displayed the recollection of an unpleasant memory. "Yes, his love was first, but I chose not to wait. He tells me I am not to blame, because he did not propose... I did not deserve his forgiveness, but I accepted it." She caressed her son's head as if in confirmation. "Like so many women of our times, I was persuaded that love is not so very important to happiness in marriage. A handsome man with excellent connections charmed me, and I thought his offer sounded agreeable enough. I knew I would never laugh as much as I would have with his brother, but I would gain a pleasant home, children and an excellent position in society. My father thought the possibility of my becoming a countess to be very advantageous and became the greatest backer of Edmund's suit. Lord and Lady Elderton seemed pleased to have me joining their family despite my roots in trade. How could I refuse?"

She saw disapproval in Elizabeth's eyes and continued her story with just a hint of defiance, "My happiness was short lived, but I was resolved to do my duty. As I said before, I believed a baby would make my life more bearable, but every time I became with child, I lost the baby." Eleanor looked away from her son and chuckled. "The Countess believed it was caused by the sadness of my situation. Edmund cared less why, but he was very annoyed with my inability to give him an heir. After my second loss, he proposed that Richard secretly replace him to do the deed."

Lizzy spoke for the first time. "So you agreed to his proposal?"

"No, I refused. I feared Edmund would divorce me if Richard and I indulged in our desire for one another, and no heir was produced. Unlike Lady Cassandra, I feared I was the problem and not sadness. Edmund would have had grounds, and he would be free to keep my fifty thousand pounds and charm a new wife. She gazed intently at Elizabeth. "Perhaps one very young and childlike that he could intimidate. I would have been banished from Elderton, and I doubt my father would have taken me back. A daughter who had been divorced by a viscount and would never become a countess was not part of his dream."

Her face became harsh as she thought of her father. "I just read a novel… Sense and Sensibility, by a lady. A story is told in the novel that is very reminiscent of mine. A wealthy young woman is in love with her guardian's younger son. Her guardian forces her to marry his older son who only appreciates her money and is very cruel. I was not forced, but...." Eleanor paused as if she was attempting to make sense of her situation. "The wife is so unhappy, that she gives in to temptation and has an affair. Her husband divorces her, keeps her wealth and throws her out. I have the novel in my room. I will loan it to you, because there is also a story of a young woman who is seduced and abandoned and bears an illegitimate child. We are not told any of the particulars of her liaison. Maybe she was not really seduced, but violated as you were. How many young women are raped, but society blames them for the children they bore out of wedlock."

Elizabeth wanted to change the subject. "So how was little Ricky conceived?"

Eleanor's smile was back in place with thoughts of the baby's father. "In November, Richard came home from Spain. Very few knew he was back in the country. Lady Cassandra and I were the only ones in residence at Elderton, as Edmund and the Earl were in London for the Little Season. The previous summer, I had lost another baby, and he returned to a very desperate and demoralized woman. It just happened. Once we were in the middle of our affair, we finally put a plan in place. If I had symptoms… and believe me I know the symptoms of being with child; I would travel to London and convince Edmund to plant some seed to disguise our plot. In the end, it was unnecessary to travel to London, because Edmund came home for Christmas, just as I noticed the first symptoms. Richard had left to return to his regiment. No one but Lady Cassandra and the staff at Elderton knew he had even been home." Eleanor chuckled as she relayed her next observation. "The servants are much more devoted to their mistress than to their master. A little kindness and respect goes a long way toward promoting loyalty."

The recent widow appeared delighted at the mere thought of her infidelity. "That month with Richard was the happiest of my life. We were very discreet. The Countess became aware of our ruse but did not disapprove. She had learned over the years that Edmund had pursued me despite knowing that Richard loved me. Besides, she cared not which of her sons fathered her grandchild."

"What does Lord Elderton think about Eric?"

"The Earl is very happy Edmund was finally successful and left a little viscount as his legacy. Luckily, because of his arrogance and delusions about his son, he has no suspicions. Lady Elderton has been vigilant in her endeavour to make him realize that the gossip circulating about Edmund has impacted the honour of the Fitzwilliam name."

"Does Darcy know the truth?"

Lady Eleanor took Elizabeth's hands and said, "Richard told Darcy before he left for war again, and I thought it important you know as well. Your sister has performed a great service for Richard and me… and I think for you and Darcy. If the baby had been a girl, we would have named her Lydia. "

Eleanor's face took on a defiant look. "The remainder of our lives is in the hands of fate. Our hope is that Richard will return from Spain healthy, and a decorated hero. Any promotions he receives, and the friendship and camaraderie he is developing with Wellington will make the possibility of our marrying despite society's disapproval much more possible." Quiet laughter was heard as she said her next words. "Luckily for us, 'Edmund's' baby was a boy, and he has become the next Viscount Wolfbridge. Now, we do not have to worry about Richard having a title to complicate our ability to marry. Lady Elderton is finding it much easier to manage Lord Elderton, and my father has gone from being able to brag about me becoming a countess, to saying his grandson will soon be an earl. I have no siblings, and I am my father's heir. If our plan comes to fruition, we will not have to worry about money."

Her good humour resulted in a moment of reflection by both women. Eleanor stroked her son's head. "In the novel I mentioned, men callously ruined the lives of both those women I told you about. I rejoice, because unlike them, we will be triumphant. We are loved by good and honourable men."

Her spoken sentiment caused Elizabeth to embrace Eleanor and whisper, "You are right, they are the best of men, and we are the luckiest of women."

Their wedding was simple, elegant and joyful. Elizabeth felt just the slightest twinge of doubt at his words to worship her with his body. Her concentration was on his face and the joy that registered in his eyes as he whispered, "now that I have your heart, I will never let it go," once the pronouncement of their married state was made to those gathered. Those who were not in attendance were missed, but those who did witness the event were filled with the wonder of this most difficult of courtships finally having its happy ending.

Bethany and Lewis once again expressed the desire for siblings to Elizabeth shortly after the ceremony concluded. Sir Walter commented on the beauty of Lizzy's gown; and she was able to share with him that Lydia had given her the design "just in case" she needed a wedding dress in the near future. Georgiana and Jamie, unbeknownst to each other, had dreams that maybe soon they would wed. Eleanor listened to the vows with thoughts of her soldier returning from this endless war, and taking his place as her husband, and father to Eric.

Darcy knew he had to be patient if she was to heal. Almost every day, he assured her he loved her; and she would never be required to fulfil any marital obligations. On an equally regular schedule, he let her know how much he hoped they would at some point have a complete marriage. His frustration was felt every night when he was alone in his room aware of her presence only a room away. With each day, she seemed to grow more used to him. She readily took his arm when they walked. Embraces were becoming quite common, and he believed they were a source of enjoyment.

Both teased and flirted with the other. Will remembered what she had revealed in her letter about his form. He found many an occasion when he would stand with his back to her so she could observe his broad shoulders, narrow waist and slim hips. His hope was that her admitted flushed feeling would make her want to observe this part of his physique more closely.

Lizzy used her knowledge of those things about her body he admired to win at chess. She inevitably wore the gown with the most revealing neckline when she challenged him to a game. As she slowly deliberated her move, she would bend over so the sight of her bosom was displayed most invitingly. She would then stick her tongue out ever so slightly and lick the corners of her mouth.

He wondered that she did not come barefoot to their contests. If she did, he knew she would win every time.

Every evening they sat in their shared sitting room and read together. Over the last three weeks since they wed, they had become comfortable sitting together in their nightclothes. Darcy was pleased that she seemed quite interested in his appearance the first time he joined her in his nightshirt and robe. Though she had looked a little startled, his plan was to ignore her apprehension and quickly become engrossed in his book.

Elizabeth had decided to follow his example the following night. She was a little annoyed that she had seemed more curious at his appearance than he displayed toward her. Once he caught her looking at his legs. He had seemed to find her blush and averted gaze humorous. She noticed he quickly hid his amusement but smiled broadly the next time she looked at him.

Will remembered how much she loved to see him smile, and in this current phase of hopeful anticipation, he used his dimples relentlessly. He practiced in the mirror, making sure he did not show his teeth. They were not as perfect as his cousin's had been, but it was important his smile not remind her of him. Darcy had also become very careful about his scent. Elizabeth had told him more than a year before that Edmund smelled of Port and tobacco, and that had made it difficult to kiss her father because he smelled the same. Darcy had never used tobacco, and he gave up Port completely after she told him of her sensory revulsion. She had written how wonderful she thought he smelled. He had been slightly shocked at first, but ultimately pleased when she revealed it was particularly appealing when combined with horse, sweat and leather. The idea of her liking the combination of those scents was somehow titillating and made him very hopeful.

This evening, Elizabeth was reading Mary Wollstonecraft's Original Stories from Real Life , illustrated by William Blake. He had bought a first edition for her as a Christmas present, and she had bought Thoughts on the Education of Daughters as a companion to Wollstonecraft's other work. William knew she was thinking of children as she read these books. He was not sure he agreed with the author, but was pleased with the direction of his wife's thoughts. It was possible she was only concerned about her current children, but he hoped she was thinking about those of the future.

She had told him Bethany wanted a sister, and Lewis wanted one of each. He asked, "Why did they know to ask you for a brother or sister after we were married?"

"They believe that getting married is what causes children. It certainly is better than thinking they are brought by storks. Georgiana told them that babies come when people get married." She laughed a little as she continued; "I was devastated when Lord Wolfbridge compromised me. I knew I was no longer chaste, and my humiliation was overwhelming; but I did not comprehend I could be with child. I was barely fifteen, and I too thought you had to be married. I was shocked when my aunt confronted me about having a baby."

Darcy did not know what to make of her ability to talk about Edmund so casually. He assumed it was a good sign, but was not certain. He wanted her turmoil to be over, and then they could agree never to talk about him ever again. He realized that was probably unrealistic, but he so wanted to spend his life with that joyful being he had met that evening at the theatre.

This night, as she retired, she told him she wanted to leave the connecting door to her room open. She had just finished reading Sense and Sensibility by a Lady. He observed her apprehension as she described the story in the novel that perturbed her. She told him of the young woman named Eliza Williams, who was the ward of a Colonel Brandon, and she was seduced by a rake named Willoughby and abandoned to have her child alone. Elizabeth told him that just when she thought she had successfully weathered the novel's reminder of her own misfortune, she was troubled by a reference to a young woman who was tragically forced to marry a rake in Original Stories from Real Life. She seemed so childlike when she told him she would feel safer with the door open tonight. He thought of his children insisting on candles being left burning at bedtime because there might be monsters under the bed.

Will continued to read after Elizabeth retired. He was actually only going through the motions, because he was unable to concentrate. Their closeness encouraged his desires, and his struggle to remain patient was what occupied his mind. He sat staring into the fire, contemplating his dilemma, when he heard noise from Elizabeth's bedchamber. It was very faint; but he thought he could perceive soft cries. He moved quickly through the door. Elizabeth was asleep but thrashing about. She was mumbling and occasionally moaning. He drew closer to hear what she was saying.

Her voice was pleading and desperate, but oddly polite, and with all the deference conferred on someone much above one's station. "Please do not do this. Please, I am afraid. Please, please, please I want to go home. Please stop, you are hurting me. Please do not do this." She said the same words over and over and she would pause occasionally and moan or cry quietly. Months ago, in the grove at Rosings, she had told him how ashamed she was that she did not fight. She had felt overwhelmed both in body and soul, and described her desperation to keep anyone else from knowing of her humiliation. However, she had never described her actual words or actions. These nightmare phrases painted a heart-rending portrait of a naïve girl caught in a trap. He had to do something. He could not bear to see her suffer.

Darcy got down on his knees next to the bed. He whispered soothingly, but felt it ill advised to touch her. "Lizzy, wake up. Dearest Lizzy, you are having a nightmare. Please wake up." He increased the volume, but with the same calming tone and repeated his refrain. She stopped mumbling and opened her eyes. She stared at him with startled eyes; and then averted her gaze, and buried her face in her pillow. He touched her back and stroked it lightly for several seconds. "Elizabeth may I comfort you. I know the Bennet sister method."

Lizzy lifted her head from the pillow and gave him an awkward smile. When he smiled back, she moved toward the middle of the bed, turned on her side facing him and said, "Yes."

He lay facing his wife and put his arms around her. He rubbed her back in a circular motion. He could feel her muscles loosen. Her cheek was against his chest, and her hands were limp at her side. She said, "You smell wonderful, Mr Darcy."

"Thank you, Mrs Darcy." Within minutes she had fallen asleep. He breathed in her scent, nuzzled her hair and felt that they had taken an important step forward. It was not long before he also succumbed to slumber.

Posted on: 2011-02-17

Chapter 53 – The House of Mirth

Elizabeth awoke several hours later, conscious of something nearby that was wonderful smelling. Safe was not a feeling she had experienced while sleeping in a very long time, but for some reason she did. Proximity to Will's chest had caused the agreeable sensation, and it was enhanced by an arm draped protectively over her.

She lay there remembering what had caused him to be beside her. His offer to comfort her had been welcomed. Within minutes of his strong hands beginning to rub her back, the fear and humiliation that had gripped her had begun to recede, and she had drifted back to sleep. It was pleasant to think of him performing such a service for her in the future.

Those embraces they had been sharing suddenly seemed even more appealing without corsets and cravats. An overwhelming desire to kiss him gripped her. His lips had found hers the day she had arrived at Pemberley, but she had been unable to react. Since that time, he had not tried again. His inaction had meant she had been unable to make up for her insufficient response. While she had waited for the second time, she had not sat idly by. She had routinely practiced arranging her lips in an appropriate pose she thought might have been correct and studied the effect in her mirror. A few days before, she had even taken the radical step of practicing the pressure and using the tip of her tongue to caress an area on her arm, which substituted for his lips.

The in and out of his breath tickled and the warm solidity of him drew her closer. As she pressed her nose against his chest and sniffed in his delightful scent, an idea gripped her. Why wait for him to initiate the kiss? It would be pleasant to experience touching his skin with her tongue. A little fluttering of some kind of anticipation in her belly urged her on. But then panic raised its ugly head and stayed her lips.

For six and a half years, she had pondered what she had lost that day… her chastity certainly... but that was only the physical manifestation of a more intangible loss. Her options had been limited. Over the years, she had done the best she could; but fear of so many things had been her constant companion. All she had been able to countenance was isolating herself in the residual memories of innocence.

A memory of that night at the theatre forced its way into her consciousness. Rather than dismissing the horrific recollection, Miranda's words enticed her… "Brave new world that has such creatures in it." A creature like Will… her Ferdinand. Suddenly with amazing clarity, she knew she should leave dread behind and embrace what she had first imagined that night.

Lizzy cautiously moved up Darcy's body; and when she was even with his lips, she took a big gulp of breath, and then slowly exhaled. She licked her lips… she had determined during her practice that moist was better than dry. She leaned in and started her kiss. After a few seconds of steadily increasing the pressure, her tongue darted out and she licked his lips and attempted to force his mouth open. She had never practiced it exactly like that, but felt rather smug that she had devised such an inspired variation. She smiled when she saw his eyes open and surprise register on his face. She pulled back so as to observe.

After staring at her with a look of concern for a few seconds, he smiled back. "Mrs. Darcy have you been practicing?"

"I have."

"With whom have you been practicing?"

"Myself… or at least with the mirror and my arm. Have I become more accomplished?"

Will laughed. "You have indeed."

"Does this place me higher on your list?"

"Mrs Darcy, you are the only woman who ever has been on my list. Somewhere deep inside, I thought you were supremely accomplished when you revealed your climb to the top of your father's library shelves to retrieve Les Liaisons Dangereuses."

"Well then, that settles it… I am ready to become your wife in the full sense of the word." Elizabeth rolled over to the opposite side of the bed and leaped out. She pulled her nightgown over her head, tossed it on the chair and walked around to the other side of the bed naked.

Darcy was startled by her behaviour. He had assumed she would want to leave her nightclothes on.

Lizzy noticed his expression and looked a little crestfallen. "Did I do something wrong? Does my body offend you?"

"No, not at all. I am just surprised you removed your gown."

"Do you mean you would have allowed me to keep it on? All this time I have been worrying about this moment… the moment when you would see me."

"I will never force you to do anything. You may put your gown back on if you would like."

Elizabeth was thoughtful as she replied, "No, I am certain it will be easier with no encumbrances, and I am resolved to do this… Hopefully one day, we will please Bethany and Lewis with a brother or a sister."

Darcy could not help but look petulant. "What about us? Do you not want to please me? Have you no hopes I will please you?"

"Of course I want to make you happy, and I now know I enjoy kissing you; but it is hard to imagine that any of the rest will be agreeable for me."

"Please Elizabeth, come to bed. You are shivering." He moved over to give her room.

When she was back next to him, he pulled her close to warm her. He was certain she was shaking from fear as well as the cold. "You do not have to submit... if you would rather wait."

"No, I am sure, I want to continue. Maybe we could kiss some more first."

That was incentive enough. He found her lips. After a few minutes, Darcy asked if he could remove his nightshirt. When Elizabeth agreed, he did so but in a much more modest fashion than she had. He did not want to frighten her even more.

The blanket covered him from the waist down, but Elizabeth was intrigued by what she could see--the muscles and the hair. His body was so different from hers. She let her fingers play over the taut skin, and then felt compelled to brush it with her lips. When he let out a low moan, she pulled away. "Did I hurt you?"

Darcy was perplexed by how to answer. He decided truth was the only course. "No, I reacted that way because your kiss was most pleasing, but unexpected."

"Lord Wolfbridge never moaned. I did; but it was not because it was pleasant." Elizabeth thought of something else that seemed different. "Do people talk as a rule during this eh… act? He did, but I did not listen." Will's eyes were full of questions. Turning away from his gaze she whispered, "Please don't talk."

They lay there in silence. Darcy became aware of just how unromantic this coupling was turning out to be. In no way did it match his dreams. He stroked her back in reassurance and wondered whether he should go to his room and wait for a more suitable time. He tried to determine her state of mind. Her eyes were closed and the tip of her tongue peeked out. He had seen that look before when she was pondering a chess move.

She finally spoke, "No, I have changed my mind. Lydia said what we are doing is about love. Keep telling me of your affection. Your words will help to persuade me 'love making' is what is happening."

Darcy spoke of her beauty and his admiration often as he resumed kissing Elizabeth. His lips explored her neck, ears and throat. She let out little mewing noises like a kitten that he found endearing. When he determined them ready to take the next step, he flashed his dimples and asked, "Elizabeth may I caress your allurements?"

She giggled at his humour and replied, "Yes, and you may kiss my assets, if you would like."

Will threw his head back and laughed; pleased that she felt comfortable enough to tease. He then proceeded to do as she asked. He explored her body with his hands, lips and tongue, all the while whispering endearments.

When it was over, Elizabeth felt it a good beginning. There had been things she found very pleasant and others less so, but the more they practiced, the better this act--this love making would surely become.

She aroused something in him that he had never before experienced. He resolved then and there, he would spend his life finding ways to please her.

For the second time that night, they fell asleep.

"Wake up, wake up… Lizzy get up, we have an appointment."

Without opening her eyes, she mumbled, "An appointment… what kind of an appointment could we have this time of the morning?"

"It is important business I have first thing every morning. Today, I would like you to attend.

"Oh, Will, I just want to sleep and then… " Elizabeth gave him a coy smile as she said, "and then maybe we could practice some more."

"Elizabeth, for over a year you have told me you could not sleep. In truth now that I am able to observe, I find you are a sleepyhead. You know how I hate disguise, and your deception could be grounds for divorce." The last was said with full dimples and twinkling eyes. "Mrs Darcy, you have slept enough. I promise we will indeed indulge in more practice, but right now, we have my morning conference. It takes place in my bedroom. Make yourself presentable and let us go… you and I are wanted."

'The 'conference' was a meeting with Bethany and Lewis, and the venue was Will's huge bed. The two little ones had chocolate, Will had coffee and Elizabeth requested tea. The children seemed very pleased she had come.

They discussed all manner of things, but the most serious topic was when their new mother would join them on their morning rides. Elizabeth explained she had never learned, and all three offered to teach her. Lizzy was finally forced to admit she was afraid.

Lewis laughed so loud and hard that Elizabeth thought he might fall off the bed. For the next half hour, she was the source of much ridicule. Their mirth was reminiscent of the humorous derision she had endured from her sisters because of her dread of horses. When their teasing was unsuccessful, Bethany and Lewis cajoled her, and Will even stooped to bribe her with a trip to Paris once the war with France was over. She remained intransigent. Bethany told her how important riding was to them as a family, and what an embarrassment it would be to all if it became known she could not ride… and what was worse, was afraid. Her daughter's words caused Elizabeth to waver,

Bethany thought of another possibility. "Papa, she could ride Pudding."

Darcy realized his daughter might have figured out something that could persuade her mother. "Elizabeth, she is perfect--a pretty, little, docile chestnut mare. I bought her so Bethany would have a horse to transition to when she is ready. If she is willing to share... "

Bethany clapped her hands and gushed. "I am willing. Oh Mama, how could you be afraid of horse named Pudding?"

This was the first time Bethany had ever called her 'Mama.' Lewis had begun calling her that as soon as the marriage service had concluded, but Bethany had held back until now. Elizabeth agreed. "I will try." The number of milestones she had passed in the last twenty-four hours left her grinning. Her family responded with laughter and kisses.

Elizabeth continued to smile as she bathed and prepared for the day. Her new maid was named Bridget, and though they had yet to become intimate in their discussions, this morning, Lizzy's mood was infectious, and both giggled at the struggle to contain her curls.

Once she was dressed and coiffed, she proceeded to the breakfast. Bridget had informed her that Mr and Mrs Bingley were already downstairs. After her wedding, they had gone to Bryn Mawr with Becky and Sir Gareth to give the newlyweds some privacy but had returned the day before to spend the rest of their time in Derbyshire with the Darcys. Will had told her after their conference with the children that Jamie had been summoned and would probably make an appearance at the morning meal. One of the groomsmen had been kicked in the leg by a horse. Elizabeth refused to be intimidated by the reason for his call. As she entered the breakfast room, he was discussing the impact of the dominance of the English on the economy of his native land.

His demeanour was very serious as he stabbed a sausage with his fork and proclaimed, "This new age has come dripping from head to foot, from every pore, with blood and dirt and much of the blood heralding the emergence of English capital has been Irish."

Elizabeth could not help herself. She was entirely too happy with her accomplishments to take his rhetoric seriously. She knew what he said was true, but this morning, all she wanted to do was giggle. She resolved to put off worrying about the fate of human kind until the morrow.

She sat down next to her sister and hummed some nameless tune under her breath. Once again, her mood was infectious, and Jane could not refrain from laughing at her sister. Lizzy gave her a look of reproach, but soon she was back looking smug and satisfied, and Jane once again began to giggle. She leaned over and whispered in Lizzy's ear, "You seem very happy this morning, and if I dare say, filled with pride and conceit. Did something momentous happen last night?"

Elizabeth looked horrified that she was so obvious. "Do you think the servants know? I will have to put on a serious face, or else everyone will know what I have done, and I will die from the mortification."

"First of all, Lizzy, they do not know you as I do. I have seen that look of satisfaction with accomplishments since you took your first step. Your face would exhibit your determination as you thought of how you would execute your task, and then be wreathed with smug smiles when you were successful. Now that you have conquered that fear… what next, riding a horse?"

"Jane, how did you know? My family put great pressure on me this morning, and I have agreed to consider learning to ride."

The demure Jane astounded the table by guffawing as boisterously as Lydia would have.

Bethany persuaded her parents and her aunt to perform at Lewis' birthday. Her brother would be thrilled, because they now had three witches to say the words from Macbeth. The newest addition to the trio was perfect. Neither child had any idea of the serious themes in the play. They just loved the sound of the words.

"Fillet of fenney snake, in the cauldron boil and bake; eye of newt and toe of frog, wool of bat and tongue of dog, adders fork and blind-worm's sting, lizard's leg and owlet's wing, for a charm of powerful trouble, like a hell-broth boil and bubble. Double, double, toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble."

Lewis was in awe of his mother's depiction of a witch. She had the very best cackle he had ever heard, and he was sure no little boy in all of England could be as happy as he was on his fifth birthday.

Millie found the sister and brother giggling with glee when she came to prepare them for bed. They were discussing the day and the joy their new mother had brought to them and to their father. Bethany said, "Oh Lewie, she is just what we wanted when we played the perfect mother game. I think it was meant to be."

In celebration of one month of marriage, Elizabeth and Will set out for a walk. Now that all their company had departed, they had time to explore the estate together. The day was beautiful, and the children were left behind in the classroom. Caliban started the journey by his mistress' side, but soon his attention was captured by a rabbit or some other woodland creature. and he reverted to the pleasures of his youth. Since his arrival at Pemberley, he had gradually relinquished the role of Elizabeth's protector to Mr Darcy.

Today they walked arm in arm--as opposed to each with their hands behind their back, as they had that morning at Netherfield. Similar to that stroll, they were silent for the early part of their journey. She spoke first, and he became privy to her thoughts. "I felt like a prisoner while I was waiting for Bethany to be born. When I looked out the window at the grounds, I wished I could be free to experience its glory."

Gesturing at their surroundings, her husband said, "And now you are the Mistress of all of this."

Her eyes followed his arm taking in the splendour. She wished she could smile, but her mind was of a different turn at present. "I am, but it is hard for me to comprehend all that has transpired at times."

His response was to pull her closer to him.

After a few more moments, she continued. "The night we made love for the first time, you said that I was the only one on your list of accomplished women." She pushed her playful spirit forward as she added, "Someday you must explain what happened to the others. But more importantly, you said it happened when you learned I had climbed to the top shelf of my father's library." With a squeeze to his arm and a grin she added, "Were you taking steps to make me feel cherished at that auspicious moment?"

"No, I meant what I said. As I told you in my letter, you captured me that night at the theatre. I have never retreated from those feelings--even when I believed you inappropriately greedy."

"Was it that you could not resist my great beauty?" She expected laughter at her tease.

Will's face filled with guilt as he blurted out, "Oh no, that was not it." Upon seeing Elizabeth's crestfallen expression, he added to his answer. "I thought your eyes and hair were particularly lovely. Both were glistening in the candlelight. Elizabeth, you looked like a very pretty little girl. Lustful or even romantic thoughts of you would have been dishonourable. I prefer to believe that I was drawn in by the liveliness of your mind and the enthusiasm of spirit you displayed for all things. The forwardness of your confession about forbidden books should have provoked my disapproval, but the witty way you owned your improper behaviour made me laugh. That is the only explanation I can give. It was not until you became--as you said--a prisoner at Pemberley that I thought of you as the most handsome woman of my acquaintance. By then, you no longer appeared as a child."

They walked on in silence each lost in their own thoughts. Suddenly he asked, "What set you off in the first place with me? You wrote that you found me handsome when we met, but my manners--my behaviour to you was often bordering on the uncivil. I rarely spoke to you without disdain. Now, be sincere; did you fall in love with me or with Bethany and Lewis?" He too was unprepared for the seriousness with which she replied.

"Yes, there was an attraction the night we met, but I also felt admiration for Lord Wolfbridge. As you say, I was a little girl. My understanding of the nature of affection between men and women was very limited. You and your cousin caused me to indulge in dreams of being wanted by handsome and powerful men. As I try to remember, this desire that I imagined the two of you felt for me was nothing more than some romantic ideal inspired by poetry and novels. I was disabused of those notions very quickly."

Darcy said nothing in the hopes she would not linger with her melancholy thoughts.

When she spoke again her delivery was thoughtful. "My love for you is much more difficult to define. I was in the middle before I understood what had begun. The spark I believed had died fought to become a flame when I was in your presence. It was the topic of my demanding money that most often met with your annoyance, but you forget the many pleasant discussions we had. I most particularly enjoyed flirting and trying to make you laugh at Netherfield. But, it was when you taught me to waltz that I truly fell in love. Your whispered words of the two of us becoming as one as we whirled in the woods sealed my fate. Nothing seemed to dislodge my tendre from that moment on--not our disastrous dance at the ball or your very uncivil words to me the next morning at Oakham Mount when I tried to tell you what Anne had done."

Darcy stopped and pulled apart from her at those words. "I thought my jealousy had destroyed any possibility of persuading you to marry after I left Hertfordshire. When I proposed, you said under different circumstances you might have been able to love me. Why did you not admit you had already fallen--to give me some encouragement?"

It would have been cruel to give you hope. Though I loved you, I still clung to the belief I could never marry." Elizabeth flashed her lopsided grin in an effort to lighten their discussion. "After you left Hertfordshire, I often entertained myself by picturing you wed to someone else. She would be adequate in most ways, but she would be at a loss how to make you laugh. Truth be told, she did not even think it important to try."

He responded as she planned by proving she was superior in every way to the imaginary wife she had conjured up. His loud laughter brought a barking Caliban to ensure all was right. They resumed walking and the dog once again became distracted by other pursuits.

An idea hit Darcy that would firmly return them to the celebratory atmosphere that had prompted their stroll. When they came to a clearing, he bowed low to his wife and asked her to waltz. As at Netherfield, she nodded her agreement, but looked at him not with trepidation but joy. The flecks in her eyes danced as he untied the ribbons beneath her chin. This time as they twirled, he held her close and it was impossible to tell where he ended and she began. There was no need for him to hum a tune--their whispered words of love for each other became the music that propelled their dance.

Epilogue

Posted on: 2011-03-15

A random act of depravity entangled the lives of Elizabeth Bennet and Fitzwilliam Darcy. Though he knew none of the particulars of what she had endured, the disturbing image of a wounded child initially provoked his protective instincts. The prejudices of the times and his family's place in society took precedence as he judged her demand for reparations, but still the attraction both felt the night they met remained. He was older, and knew of such things but was bound by vows to another. She had been little more than a child, and the feelings she experienced for him--as well as her violator--had been new and unfathomable.

Elizabeth's need for revenge inadvertently put her child in Mr Darcy's hands. This baby ignited a spark that he had thought lost. Besides rekindling memories of the happy times of his youth, the little girl was also a reminder of her mother. Was she a joyful impertinent child, a haunted Little Red Riding Hood, a scheming wanton or a thoughtful girl who had become a woman before his eyes? She had given her opinions decidedly for so young a person, and her wit had made him laugh. For almost five years, both before and after his wife's death, he privately indulged in remembering her. Just as fear became her constant companion, guilt became his.

A chance meeting--initiated by the child--developed into a friendship for Darcy with an amiable young man. Was it a simple twist of fate or was it meant to be? Though the rape at the hands of his cousin had destroyed her belief in the possibility of love, his presence in Hertfordshire released a longing that threatened to put her once again in harm's way. For his part, the second time in her presence provoked his fascination and a need to untangle the enigma that was Elizabeth Bennet. Like beings pulled by Mesmer's theory of animal magnetism or guided by Prospero's magic wand, their destiny was set in motion.

The two settled into a life of strong attraction, admiration, respect and common purpose. To that, we must add laughter and an ability to speak freely with each other about many things. Words had been important to accomplishing their marriage, and frank discussion served them well throughout the years.

Elizabeth was most responsible for lacing their communication with humour. Her husband often found notes in his pocket. The first one he discovered, during a meeting with his steward. It had caused him to turn quite red after reading its ribald message. Upon realizing her intention was to continue the practice into perpetuity, he checked his pockets every morning before he was in another's presence. She often seemed to be waiting to hear his laughter drift into their bedroom from his dressing room.

Both remembered her father's axiom, "unhappiness has comic aspects one should never underestimate." It was uppermost in their minds as they weathered life's toils and troubles. However, some events defied their ability to find the comedy. Mr. Bennet's death ten years after their marriage was something Lizzy did not find humorous. However, after a time of some significant grief, she chose to remember that which gave her pleasure, and many of those memories of her father made her laugh.

Another maxim this couple lived by came from Lady Catherine. Though it was far from her intent to inspire such behaviour on the part of her son-in-law and his new wife, inspire it she did. They determined that in love making, practice makes perfect. Still, they also resolved that their practice should never be a duty the way Lady Catherine had implied, and both embraced spontaneity.

Elizabeth's favourite impulsive act of ardent love happened after the first Midsummer picnic she attended as Mistress of Pemberley. Being quite fatigued, she fell asleep on top of the coverlet. She was awakened some time later by kisses and licks to her toes. Confusion followed, but the finesse of the ministrations persuaded her that the perpetrator was not a dog who had found its way to the forbidden territory of the family bedchambers. Anticipation had overtaken her as the dispenser's expert lips travelled up her body.

Through the years, they often contemplated who bore the most credit for bringing them together. Both rejected the idea that the honour went to Edmund, although they realized without his cruelty, they might never have remembered each other. Darcy was convinced Charles inviting him to Hertfordshire was crucial. Elizabeth agreed, but felt Mary's insisting she come to Kent more important, because that was where she first accepted the meaning of her longings. The crucial role of the world-weary Richard and the forward and boisterous Lydia was acknowledged. However, in the end, they always agreed it was Bethany who had been the catalyst… both would laugh, as they pondered the possibility that she might know something about how the universe worked, with all her talk of signs.

Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth Darcy, and their extended family and friends, were much like others living in privilege in this great new age. The major difference was that their group cared little for gossip, gambling or philandering as diversions. Their mundane concerns were keeping their families financially sound, enjoying each other's company, and ensuring their children were prepared to succeed in a rapidly changing world. Though they had their share of heartaches; none had to worry about starvation, malnutrition or many of the diseases that were rampant because of crowded and unsanitary conditions or lack of heat. All were aware of the dislocation and sudden loss of income that many in their society experienced, but they were protected from the vagaries of the times by wealth and prudence.

Catherine and John Reynolds lived well. He did, indeed, become one of the wealthiest men in all of Hertfordshire, as Mr Bennet had predicted. Kitty's designs for children's dishes based on the Perrault fairy tales were used by the Wedgewood pottery works. The Reynolds, Wedgwood and intertwined Darwin families became friends through this business relationship. John contributed money for Charles Darwin's voyage to Tierra del Fuego. Of the Reynolds's seven children, five boys and two girls, the youngest male was inspired by this friendship with Darwin to become a botanist. One of his sisters, who had abilities as an artist, like her mother, collaborated with her brother; and the resulting book on the plants of Hertfordshire was both beautiful and well received by the scientific community for its scholarship.

Jane and Charles Bingley purchased Netherfield from Sir Walter, and within five years, put the estate back on a firm financial footing. Charles' roots in trade became instrumental in their success. It was decided to develop Jane's business. In the beginning, the revenues were seen as a way to enhance the estate's income, but soon the emphasis shifted, and they began seriously making and selling her scented waters and sachets. After the war with France ended, they did, indeed, visit Grasse as Charles had promised, but decided that rather than develop the exotic and complex fragrances that came from that region, they wanted their products to remain reminiscent of simple English scents.

Their firm, Bingley of Bath, began by developing four wonderful essences of lavender, rose, jasmine and lilac. They grew the plants needed on the estate. The name of the firm was chosen because of its alliterative quality; and Bath was the first place they chose to seriously acquaint customers with their wares. Soon they began developing other beauty items. Their skin lotion became even more popular than Gowland, and Sir Walter was the most effective advocate for its powers. He swore by it to all his acquaintances in Bath and London. He loved to point to Jane when in company, and declare that all the ladies would look like her if they used Bingley of Bath's lotion. The couple's four children, two boys and two girls, were as angelic looking as their parents, and all grew to be excellent ambassadors for their family's business.

Lydia and Ronald Bledsoe returned to England after four years in Canada. His best friends, who knew of the events in Brighton, persuaded him that all curiosity about the former Lord Wolfbridge's demise had been eclipsed by other scandals Few could even remember the particulars of the viscount's murder. Sally did not return with them. She had married a young lieutenant and the couple decided to remain in Canada. Bledsoe, a highly decorated officer, weary from war, craved a more tranquil life. He resigned his commission and settled in Hertfordshire to be near his dear wife's family. The Gouldings had recently quit Haye Park, and Mr Bledsoe bought that property. It was fortuitous it was such a large house, for Lydia and Ronald eventually had thirteen children--this was either a testament to their enjoyment of each other, or perhaps it was her tenaciousness that allowed her to carry so many babies to the end of her confinement.

Their home became the centre of social life in Meryton. Lydia's table was known far and wide as the best in the county. The Bledsoe daughters were always beautifully dressed, though it was not because Lydia spent to excess on their finery. Their elegant appearances were due mainly to their mother's creativity. She had learned to live frugally on her husband's army pay. They came back to England ready to embrace the industrial revolution taking the country by storm. Their considerable savings were invested in railroads at a most advantageous moment. Ronald Bledsoe rivalled his brother-in-laws, William, John, Charles and Fitzwilliam, for the esteem of his wife's father.

Just before Darcy and Elizabeth were to leave for London in the spring of 1813 so Georgiana could make her debut, Dr Wilder visited Pemberley. He had been invited for dinner but came early to practice the duet he and Georgiana had been readying as a present for the newlyweds' six-month anniversary party. They were just about to rehearse the piece a second time, when suddenly, just as she had envisioned in her dreams; he pulled her hands from the keys, kissed her palms and wrists fervently and expressed his desire to marry her. Darcy accepted the passionate Irishman to be his brother immediately, and thus was spared spending the Season in London.

Richard Fitzwilliam and Lady Eleanor finally wed in 1817. He had first distinguished himself in the Battle of Vitorio, and then followed Wellington into France. Once again, he was cited for his accomplishments at Orthez and Toulouse. Just before Waterloo, he was promoted to general. The couple waited a year after he returned to marry. They preferred to give the appearance that their love developed after he was back at Elderton, and he had resigned his commission.

Mr Harding died in 1818, followed a year later by the Earl. The couple moved with Eric and their new baby daughter, Cassandra, to Manchester. Richard Fitzwilliam managed the textile business that had been inherited from his father-in-law. He was a good motivator of his workers, much as he had been a good commander to his troops.

Seven-year-old Eric became the Earl of Elderton on the passing of his grandfather. Richard had requested of Dr Wilder, that he and Georgiana live on the estate and attempt to improve it financially for the boy. It was a difficult task, since the Fitzwilliam family had mismanaged the property for several generations. One other provision of this arrangement made for the benefit of the young earl involved the property known as Wolfbridge that abutted Elderton, and was the seat for the viscountancy of the same name. Richard Fitzwilliam and his mother had cajoled his father into having some land on that property set aside to be used for the improvement of the citizens of Derbyshire. A building was to be built there to house the New Hope Wolfbridge hospital. They had shamelessly convinced the Earl of Elderton that it would be a fitting monument to his murdered son.

Lady Catherine de Bourgh died three years after the passing of Lord Elderton. Her sister-in-law saw the death of the sister and brother as an opportunity to redouble her efforts to change the image of the Fitzwilliam family name for her grandson. Lady Cassandra believed she was infusing the Darcy tradition of honour, family love and respectability into his legacy. By the time Eric had a son, who could become the next Viscount Wolfbridge, the association with that title would be transformed from cruelty to charity.

Many from the numerous estates as well as those involved in trade in the county donated funds for the hospital. Mr and Mrs Darcy were some of the most tireless crusaders for providing medical care to the people of Derbyshire. Each summer they hosted an extravagant benefit that drew hundreds to Pemberley for a Midsummer picnic.

Sir Walter gave up a permanent residence in Bath, and for the remainder of his life, lived by the kindness of family and friends. He spent Christmas every year in Derbyshire with Sir Gareth and Lady Hughes and their five children. He often stayed with Lord and Lady Hastings during the Season, and used his time wisely promoting Bingley of Bath scents and lotion. He returned to Hertfordshire during the autumn, and was always welcomed by the numerous grandchildren of his childhood friend, Thomas Bennet., as their almost grandpapa. Jane and Charles set aside an apartment in the family wing at Netherfield for him.

Sir Walter asked Mrs. Bennet whether she wanted to marry and accompany him on his annual circuit. She declined, and told him they could spend time with each other when he was in Hertfordshire, or perhaps she would see him when she visited her grandchildren in Derbyshire, but in truth, she was content being a widow.

The ten years after the marriage of her last daughter were some of the happiest of Mrs Bennet's life. Reading to her husband, writing correspondence for him and keeping the books, as Lizzy and Mary had done before her, became her daily routine. She rarely had time for gossip but did not miss the diversion. Frances Bennet felt profoundly sad upon the death of Thomas Bennet, but her grief was less devastating because of the many pleasant memories of their time together.

Soon after becoming Mistress of Pemberley, Elizabeth hoped to persuade Mrs Reynolds to move into the family quarters as a relative. Retiring was also uppermost in the housekeeper's mind now that her master was most agreeably settled. However, she preferred to move in with her brother and sister-in-law. One request she made was that she be allowed to attend any births. She was, indeed, there with Bronwyn Hinton when Lizzy gave birth to the first babies born to her as Mrs Darcy.

Twins satisfied both their existing little one's desires--their new mother gave them a boy and a girl. Bethany immediately started planning for things she and her new sister could do when she was older. Lewis also thought about what activities he could indulge in with his new siblings, but his main wish was that his mother would get her strength back quickly, and once again be able to tell him stories, tuck him in and cuddle with him during their morning family meetings. He believed he loved his new brother and sister, but he was certain he loved his mama even more.

They were given the names Richard and Lydia. Their personalities were opposite to their namesakes… Lydia was most like Cousin Richard, and Richard was most like his Aunt Lydia.

Lydia became aware of the power she held over her father at an early age. Once she realized he responded to her ability to make him laugh, she was relentless. A sort of disrespect even greater than her sister Bethany's was tolerated by her father. Lydia, from the time she was very young, felt no hesitancy in calling him 'silly'… a sort of childish version of naïve and witless… when his behaviour deserved the epithet. At first, he thought she was skilled at her grandfather Bennet's barbs, but later, after years of observing her, he decided the trait was more like his cousin's. No one, except Richard Fitzwilliam, was as adept at manipulating Darcy into achieving his potential.

The Darcy's son, Richard, developed a reputation for being forward with the young ladies. His parents feared they might have a rake in the making, but soon determined that he simply preferred the company of females. The youthful Richard was definitely not like his brother Lewis, but instead, early on, decided he wanted all the fun he could muster before life forced him to settle down. His notion of enjoyment meant pleasing many young women. At assemblies and balls, he danced every dance. Seeing young women sitting down without a partner was the cause for much anguish to him.

At eighteen he had been gripped by an uncharacteristic passion for one woman. He proposed to his cousin Elizabeth Collins. She was a pretty, young woman and a magnificent story teller. In that she reminded him of his mother, but that was where the similarity ended. She was much more serious in her subjects than her namesake. One Sunday afternoon he became mesmerized while she was relaying a particularly heroic tale. His offer the next day was gravely rejected when she cited his frivolous ways as the reason for her objection. His dejection propelled him to follow the path of the man he was named for, and he persuaded his father to purchase a commission for him. He was the second son after all. Only belatedly did he realize that it would be men in whose company he would be most of the time. It was fortunate that the early part of his tenure in the army was at a time of relative peace, and soldiers were allowed plenty of opportunity to charm the ladies. When asked why he had chosen his career, he admitted openly, his main hope had been to win the admiration of women. He felt his form was most attractively set off by the uniform.

His twin, who was as devoted to him as her sister Bethany was to their brother Lewis, often rolled her eyes at Richard and exclaimed, "Let us hope the country is never dependent on your abilities as a soldier… I fear at the moment of battle you will be distracted by a young woman and forget to fire."

Three more girls, Jane, Mary and Catherine, had followed the twins for Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam Darcy. Having so many daughters was the cause of much dread on the part of their father. He would have to participate in the Season entirely too often for his taste. His constant complaining about having to beard the ton in their den five times caused his ten year-old daughter, Lydia, to put her hands on her hips and say, "Papa, stop whining, and do your duty. What conceit to think you might be forced to dance? You are old, and your looks are only tolerable. No woman will pay consequence to you… except Mama."

His daughter's shocking words caused Darcy to cut back at meals and begin an exercise program designed by Jamie to trim his middle. Elizabeth thought he was looking quite tolerable, and told him so in the privacy of their boudoir--especially when he was sans culottes and sans everything else. It rekindled a new wave of spontaneity and the result was their last child, Thomas.

When Richard Darcy was sent to Afghanistan in 1839, he disproved his twin's pronouncement. The twenty-five year-old lieutenant was a courageous and disciplined member of HM 13th Foot during the storming of the Gates of Ghuznee. He was promoted to captain for his heroism and composed demeanour under fire. As word of the annihilation of the 44th Regiment of Foot battalion reached England, his mother, his twin and the woman who had rejected him years before all diligently prayed that a similar fate would not befall the 13th.

Once back at Pemberley with his family, Richard voiced the opinion that the foray into Afghanistan had to be one of Britain's most ill-advised and disastrous wars. He stopped short of telling any, even Richard Fitzwilliam, details of siege of Jalalabad and the reprisals they had inflicted for the destruction of Elphinstone's forces. What was clear to his family was that the glamour of military life was over for him.

Soon after Richard's return, Lewis spoke to his father about the unfairness of the circumstances of his birth. Life was about much more than wealth and property, and he had no desire to carry the burden and responsibility for two estates. The oldest Darcy son had, indeed, married Sian Hughes. Shortly after their wedding, the couple had moved to Kent to manage Rosings. Both he and Sian pined for Derbyshire and their families. He petitioned his father to allow Richard to inherit Rosings. In truth, it took little persuasion. That Anne DeBourgh's son wanted to give part of his birthright to Elizabeth Bennet's son seemed appropriate to his father. As he signed the documents changing his will, his thoughts were of Bethany and her belief in signs.

Mrs Bennet stayed on at Longbourn after Mr and Mrs Collins returned to assume ownership of the estate. She doted on their five children, as well as her numerous other grandchildren close by in Hertfordshire. She never once thought of finding husbands or wives for any of them. She became fond of saying on the subject 'it is a truth universally acknowledged that what will be, will be.' Mary was pleased that her daughters would not experience the pressure she and her sisters had. Mr Collins agreed with his wife. He enjoyed having his children at home or within an easy distance of Longbourn.

Their oldest daughter, Elizabeth, was well into spinsterhood when she made a fateful trip. Her favourite cousin, Lady Lydia Rathbone, invited her to accompany her family on a trip to Rosings for Easter. Now that her twin was master there, she wanted to renew the tradition of springtime in Kent. Both young women remembered fondly the times they had spent together at the estate as children. The trio were the same age and had been great friends since practically in their cradles. After her rejection of Richard Darcy, Elizabeth Collins had seen him only briefly. On those few occasions they had been in each other's company, she had treated him with an indifference that belied the turmoil in her heart.

Elizabeth had always enjoyed Richard's company; but when he caught her unawares with his ardent proposal, she had refused because he seemed too feckless to make a well-suited partner for her. His principal interests seemed to be dancing and turning the heads of young ladies. She preferred solitary enjoyments--reading, writing, gardening and contemplating the struggle between good and evil. She even aspired to write novels like Jane Austen, though she felt it unrealistic to always provide readers with a happy ending. She had precipitously concluded, Richard would never understand such hopes. Still, he seemed much altered since returning from Afghanistan.

About a week after she arrived, the two met one morning while he was out surveying the grounds. She was rereading Persuasion and it and being in his presence had put her in mind to remember possible past regrets. She had hardly been persuaded by another, as her decision had been wholly her own.

Richard sat beside her on a fallen branch in the grove where they had often played as children. It had been a favourite spot for picnics and kite flying when the two families spent time together in Kent. His Aunt Georgiana had even said this particular log was special to his parents. She said it had been a place where they met to talk when courting.

Elizabeth's voice was filled with emotion as she spoke. "Richard, I was relieved when I learned you had returned home safely--though it is evidence of what a selfish creature I must be that I could think only of you when so many souls were lost. Tell me what it was like. Is it true Dr Brydon was the only one to survive the retreat from Kabul to Jalalabad?"

Her heartfelt words and the compassion in her eyes moved him to tell another the details of the horrors he had witnessed. First he spoke of the difficulty campaigning in Afghanistan's inhospitable mountainous terrain with its extremes of weather. Her rapt attention encouraged him to admit the frustration he had felt with the turbulent politics and the armed and refractory population--they had resented the British occupation. He even admitted he felt little stake in England's 'Great Game' to dominate Central Asia. This conversation was nothing like any he had ever had with a young lady in a ballroom. The pain he felt when he described the destruction of the bazaar in Kabul in retaliation for the annihilation of the 44th was clearly shared by her. The simple act of putting her hand on his arm in comfort and forgiveness gave him hope. As he told his story, he became aware that not only was Elizabeth a wonderful spinner of tales, but she was also a consummate listener.

Over the next few days, they met often for walks and talked of many things neither had ever spoken of before with the other sex. She told him of her hope to write a novel, and his sincere encouragement surprised her. His desire to make Rosing's park more natural and rid it of the artifice that Lady Catherine had put in place was met with her enthusiasm and numerous suggestions. As she had spent the first ten years of her life near the property, she showed him many nooks and crannies he had yet to explore.

One day they decided to inspect what remained of her father's garden and walked to the parsonage. Elizabeth was pleased that most of his efforts were still there, including his tribute to his wife and children spelled out in grape hyacinth. Nestled among the names of the Collins, Elizabeth showed him two others--Lew and Beth. All looked a bit ragged, but Richard was moved by his uncle's simple testament to his family. Love had been threatening to bloom between the cousins all week and suddenly Richard was inspired to proffer a second proposal. This time she accepted, and they were married at Hunsford church in June.

After five years of marriage to Lord Goldstaff, the former Caroline Bingley breathed a sigh of relief when a male child was finally born to her. Four confinements and entirely too many nights of Percy's sweaty fumblings and grunts had occasionally seemed a very high price to pay. With her duty done, Lady Caroline eagerly anticipated what lay ahead. To think she had been willing to waste her great beauty and many accomplishments on the widowed, untitled Mr Darcy, who already had an heir. Any children she would have produced would not have inherited either Pemberley or Rosings. She pondered whether she should cut all ties to her brother and his Bennet relations. Charles might now have an estate; but as long as he persisted in dabbling in trade, he was not a good example for the children of a peer. She did occasionally feel a bit of discomfort when she noticed the look of contentment that so often graced the faces of Jane and her sister Elizabeth.

Just as she was about to step forward and claim the role due her among those of the highest rank, Percy became contrary. The rotund viscount began spending all his time with another. He informed his wife, the gentlemen at his club and almost everyone in their set that now that he had an heir he preferred the company of his long time mistress. The woman was older, less attractive and to Caroline had absolutely no fashion sense. Mrs Hurst had heard from the gossips of the ton that she was a former courtesan that a young Lord Goldstaff had plucked from a bawdy house and installed in a house in Brighton long before he pursued Miss Bingley. It was rumoured she was always in good spirits and was skilled in satisfying a man of his girth. When Caroline asked why he had married her he replied, "Your inferior connections made you the perfect bride to provide an heir. You were entirely too hungry for consequence to question any flagrant behaviour on my part."

Caroline decided she should carry on as though she cared nothing for her husband's indiscretions. Instead, she put her energy into arranging marriages for her children. It was a challenge because all had inherited their figures from their father. And to her chagrin, she also had to put up with the persistent chattering about her brother being the purveyor of Bingley of Bath lotion. She was appalled when she heard Mr Darcy had allowed the daughter of Anne de Bourgh to marry a Frenchman and a maker of chocolate. She even heard it whispered that his parents had been Jacobins… whatever that was.

Bethany Darcy grew into a great beauty. Her hair and eyes resembled those of her stepmother, but that was where the physical resemblance ended. She was tall, had the most perfect white teeth, a beautiful smile and an aristocratic nose. She had dimples like her father… well not exactly the same, for she only had one on the left side of her face.

Bethany did, indeed, meet and marry a French maker of exquisite chocolate during her first Season. She did not meet him at a ball or at the home of any member of the ton. She met him in Cheapside at the warehouse of her mother's Uncle Gardiner. His son, David Gardiner, introduced them. The young Frenchman was romantic to Bethany. As she became better acquainted with him and learned his family history, he became the stuff of dreams for her.

As a young woman, his mother had made her living in a small chocolate shop her parents had left her. Inspired by hopes of a better life, she threw herself into the struggle to end the rule of the Bourbons and establish a democratic people's government in France. With others she had founded the Society of Revolutionary Republican Women. The group had participated in the women's march on Versailles that brought Louis back to Paris to be held responsible for the deplorable suffering of the people of Paris.

After the revolution, Pauline Leclerc, nee Leon, taught her son the skill of making chocolate, and he built her small business into a larger one. He was in London waiting to discuss with Mr Gardiner and his son, aid in procuring a source for a special cacao found only in Central America when he saw the most beautiful young woman he had ever seen. She was in an animated discussion with the younger man. She laughed with abandon, and her eyes had a unique sparkle when she teased David Gardiner. Theo Leclerc observed the two together, and he was envious of this young man to have won the admiration of such a woman. It was with great relief that he learned the two had been close friends since childhood, and he was seen by her as an older brother in whom she felt comfortable confiding.

Bethany was invited to taste his chocolate with the Gardiners. She believed that even without the special cacao he was seeking, she had never tasted anything so delightful… the texture was like silk, the flavour dark and rich, but not too sweet. It was scrumptious.

Theo Leclerc told her stories of his mother, father and their revolutionary colleagues… Marat, Robespierre, Desmoulins, Danton, and the author of the Declaration of the Rights of Women and Citizens, Olympe de Gouges. His description of the sacrifices his parents had made for the French people made her tremble as she observed the fervour of his pride. He reminded Bethany of her Uncle Jamie and his stories of Ireland.

Fitzwilliam Darcy was not pleased when this young man asked his daughter to marry him. His beloved Bethany would leave England. After months of cajoling, Elizabeth persuaded him to agree. She could see the look of love in her daughter's eyes, and she thought the young man worthy. To the twenty thousand pound dowry from her father, her mother added an additional ten thousand pounds--outside any marriage settlement. It was the remainder of the money she had invested with her uncle. As she prepared for her daughter's wedding, Elizabeth knew the money she had negotiated so many years before belonged to no one but Bethany.

The new bride used the money to purchase a house in the Place des Vosges. Once settled, their home became a gathering place for all manner of artists and authors. The novelist Victor Hugo became a neighbour. Bethany enjoyed being a Parisienne, but when possible she returned to Pemberley with her children for the annual Midsummer Picnic. .

In 1833 Elizabeth and Will reciprocated and visited their daughter. Her father was worried about the safety of their trip since reading of the uprising in Paris upon the death of General Lamarque. Bethany assured her father it was currently quite peaceful in the French capital. Per his request, she arranged for her parents to finally see Le Misanthrope at the Comedie Francaise. Elizabeth's dream, as told to Darcy the night they met, was to finally be fulfilled.

One afternoon, Bethany took her mother on an excursion to visit Moliere's grave. Darcy preferred to remain at home to spend time with his granddaughters. Each little girl seemed to be a variation of his beloved Elizabeth… Pauline was witty and made him laugh, Theodora was smart and hoped to beat him at chess, and Chloe had her grandmother's hair and eyes.

The sprawling cemetery was called Pere Lachaise, and in the beginning, those who had developed it had found it difficult to attract new customers. Elizabeth thought the comedy of her favourite playwright's final resting place to be fitting. She had laughed in disbelief when Bethany told her of the depths to which the administrators had stooped to entice the people of Paris to bury their dead in a place that was not quite as accessible as desired. They had dug up some of France's most revered like Moliere and La Fontaine and relocated them to this remote location. A few years later in an even bolder move, the doomed lovers Heloise and Abelard were interred there. Now the bourgeoisie of Paris, in their desire to get close to greatness, was helping it to become a very fashionable address for the dead. On the way back to the Marais, they stopped for refreshments.

A mischievous glint in her daughter's eyes prompted Elizabeth to conclude she had planned a special treat. The cafe served Madeleines. As she took her first bite of the buttery goodness, memories came flooding back. Foremost among them was the tea the two had shared the day she arrived at Pemberley. Bethany's brilliant smile caused her to recall the little girl's lisp and missing front teeth.

Bethany too was remembering that day. Elizabeth had admitted to having been at Pemberley and in the nursery. That curious fact had been added to others she had learned from David Gardiner. He had first sparked her suspicions when she heard about his trip to Derbyshire with his Cousin Elizabeth the summer before she was born. The most intriguing thing he told her was that Miss Lizzy had always worn an amber cross with an ant trapped inside just like hers. After Elizabeth became her new mother, she wondered why she never wore that necklace. With maturity and an understanding of relations between men and women, she believed she had finally determined why. The time had never seemed right to confront her parents with her suspicions, but now with three daughters of her own--she felt the time had come to demand the whole truth.

Bethany took a sip of chocolate to calm herself. "I know you are my mother."

"Of course, I am. I have been your mama since I married your father."

"No, you were my mother before you married Papa."

Elizabeth stared at her daughter with panic in her eyes. "What do you mean, Bethany?"

"I believe you are my real mother, and I used to believe Papa was my father. As a child, I could not understand how that could be. Still there were unsettling facts. Davey told me about your trip to Derbyshire before I was born. Aunt Kitty remembered you describing the Perrault murals to her. Bethany touched the cross that hung around her neck. "Papa said this necklace had been left by my mother for me. All of your sisters have amber crosses but not you. Aunt Mary said each of you had been given one by your parents on the occasion of your fifth birthday--same as when I was given mine."

"That is ridiculous--mere coincidences. I had met your mother and father in London. I saw the wall painting in the nursery when I came to visit them during my trip to Derbyshire with the Gardiners." Elizabeth paused. She could not meet Bethany's eyes as she tried to think of an answer. She touched the silver necklace Mrs Wilder had given her. "I lost my cross years ago. I do not remember when. Ummm.... Maybe I lost it at Pemberley. Your mother probably found it, liked it and left it for you."

Bethany refused to be stayed by Elizabeth's discomfort. "The murals in the nursery were done in September of 1806. David said he remembers being in Derbyshire during the summer, and you were left with Uncle Jamie when they returned to London. I have much finer jewellery left to me by Anne DeBourgh. There is nothing I have ever heard about her that makes me believe she would treasure a simple amber cross with an insect trapped inside, but Thomas Bennet's impertinent daughter would."

Elizabeth looked away as she tried to think of a way to tell her daughter about her birth while protecting her from the horror. It seemed so wrong to besmirch Will's honour, but she felt that the only course. Before she could say anything her daughter spoke again.

"There are also things that make me believe Cousin Edmund might have been my father. I think it time you tell me the whole truth."

"Why would you think such a thing?"

"Ric believes it possible. He is quite certain Cousin Richard is his father and not Edmund. We have both heard things over the years that make us question the official story."

"You have talked about this with each other?"

"Yes. Please, Mama, tell me what I want to know."

Elizabeth was tired of hiding the truth from her daughter. She did as Bethany asked and told her everything. Her biggest fear had always been that she would think herself tainted for having a depraved father. She started with their meeting at the theatre in London and the performance of the Tempest. As the story tumbled out, she decided not to conceal anything. She ended by telling her daughter the circumstances of the death of the Viscount Wolfbridge.

Bethany sipped her chocolate for several minutes after Elizabeth finished. When she spoke, her words were unexpected. "Mama, I am so proud to be your daughter, and to be the niece of Aunt Lydia. You were both so young and so brave."

"We were young, but we were hardly brave. We reacted to horror."

"To me you were like Theo's mother. I have always been proud that my daughters had Pauline for a grandmother, because of the sacrifices she made for so many." With a laugh she added, "The fat bourgeois of Paris owes his comfortable life to those like Pauline who acted. Now I learn you dared. You did not sit idly by, as Papa likes to say. Bethany took her mother's hands before she spoke again. "I love you, Mama. Someday I plan to tell my daughters your story--and Aunt Lydia's--so they can tell their daughters and their daughters can tell their daughters… on and on and on."

Neither mother nor daughter said anything for a few moments. Finally Bethany asked the inevitable question. What was Edmund like?"

Elizabeth continued to hold her daughter's hands as she spoke. "You have his teeth and his nose. He was handsome, charming, and he smiled a great deal. Unfortunately, he cared for no one but himself." She shook her head and smiled as tears threatened to fall. "I do not understand why he liked to inflict pain or intimidate young girls. None of us could ever make sense of his actions… not Cousin Richard, Lady Cassandra or your papa. Long ago, I chose to believe Will is your true father. He sang to you, he read to you, he taught you to play chess." Lizzy chuckled as she remembered her daughter's competitive nature. "He even let you win in the beginning to give you confidence. You are what he made you, and you are nothing like Edmund, except for a few physical characteristics."

Bethany gave her mother a very worried look. "Mama, do not ever tell Lewis. He is too fine a man to worry about having a mother who committed a thoughtless act that caused you to be hurt. He never knew her. You are the mother he has known and loved… in some ways, more than any of the rest of us. Please, let us never give him cause to question his goodness."

Elizabeth Darcy was overcome by Bethany's charitable words. She nodded her head in agreement, and allowed the tears to fall.

Bethany was too old to man the barricades when revolution broke out all over Europe in 1848, but she opened her home to the young participants, and lived vicariously through the excited laughter that came with their successes, and despaired with them when their comrades were killed. Because Bethany and Theo had not actually participated in the streets, they were spared repression when Napoleon III seized power in 1851. Their friend and neighbour, Victor Hugo, was forced to flee and settled in Guernsey until he returned to France in 1870. While he was in exile, he wrote Les Miserables, and it was published in 1862. Bethany immediately sent her mother a copy. Elizabeth Darcy wrote her daughter to thank her for the gift. Her handwriting was still legible, but her daughter noticed it was shakier than it had been only the month before.

Pemberley, Derbyshire
18 November 1862

I will always love you.

The news of her mother's death reached Bethany just two days after her letter arrived, and one day before her birthday. She wondered whether her mother knew it had been time and wanted to make certain her precious bundle reached her.

The letters, speaking of the magnitude of their love, were indeed a comfort. The lists they wrote to each other caused Bethany to blush. Once the mortification that they had experienced lascivious feelings for each other subsided, she laughed. The heartfelt note Elizabeth had written as she gave Blake's Songs of Innocence and Experience to her Will unleashed tears. Every word of her mother's first letter, sent after his time in Hertfordshire, was painful to read. The fear of exposure and grief at being forced to leave her daughter ignited contemplation of the irony of Bethany's life. The parent she had always known--was not. The one she had helped her father pursue--was. Winning her mother had not been easy--there had been no Prospero with a magical staff for them. Unlike Miranda and Ferdinand, their marriage had been their own doing. It had been accomplished because they had overcome almost insurmountable obstacles and together claimed the prize of much deserved joy.

The End