Section I, Next Section
I
Trafalgar Square was virtually bursting for it currently was occupied with almost as many pigeons as people. Felipe sat on a stone bench observing the scene before him as he leisurely ate a sandwich. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a young woman and some small children enjoying themselves thoroughly as they threw around seed and watched the birds flock towards it. Felipe smiled at the sight, he leaned back his head and a small smile played at the corner of his lips as the warm sunlight seeped through his pores. It was wonderful to just BE here he thought as his mind briefly rested on all the obstacles he had to bridge just to get a chance to be a normal student for a summer at the London School of Economics. His mother thought he was taking a summer sabbatical in a secluded cove of Mauritious, what on earth would she think if she knew he was here; mixing with the commoners of all things.
The most incredible part of the whole affair was that now he could sit amongst the general populace and not be mobbed. Something he had never experienced before, he knew that were it not for his beard and his sunglasses there were those who - even in England - that would recognize him, yet for now he appeared like just another face in the crowd.
It was wonderful being the master of one's own destiny. If he wanted to eat in the park he didn't have to consult his personal secretary, nor did the Royal guard have to be moved to another location, nor did he have to endure the scrutiny of the press as they had another blasted 'Felipe Sighting.' All he had to do now was buy a sandwich and walk to the park.
Felipe looked down at his watch, 'almost one' he thought with a sigh and brushed a hand through his rather unruly dark locks. He eased up with the quiet dignity that he had been unable to shake, try as he ought he simply could not slouch! He walked with such grace that he even managed to turn a few heads, and a select few would even swear later that they had thought that he looked so much like....
"Oh excuse me," he cried as he collided with someone and an avalanche of papers fluttered to the floor. A slender, beautiful hand methodically picked up each of the papers. Felipe bent to help the young woman, but froze when he noticed her olive complexion, 'one of my countrymen' he thought with no little trepidation.
The girl's head bobbed up revealing a lightly tanned face framed by wisps of hair. The girl's high cheekbones, delicate nose, and full lips gave her a decidedly exotic look. Yet, what captured Felipe were her eyes, whereas those of Spanish women were fiery and challenging and exciting, this girl's were smoldering; indeed, one could easily lose one's self in the huge, almond-shaped hazel eyes. No, this girl was DEFINATELY not from Spain.
The girl had by now collected all her papers and noticed with a faint blush that Felipe was staring at her rather unabashedly. She stuck out her hand, upon which rested a delicate gold bracelet, "Aaliyah."
Felipe hesitated, his instinct said run, for he had vowed not to become familiar with anyone lest they should betray his identity to the public, or worst the press, yet he found his hand grasping hers, "Felipe." Her hands were incredibly soft, almost like satin, "your hands...they're so soft." stupid, what a stupid comment he chided himself.
Aaliyah chuckled softly at his consternation, "Thank you, my best friend says they're the hands of a woman whose never worked a day in her life."
'Neither has mother' he thought with a sigh, 'but her hands definitely don't feel like that.' This girl definitely didn't dress like his mother either, attired in a white peasant blouse and faded jeans, yet she exuded a natural elegance that gave even her casual attire a polished look. Seeing her arms filled with papers he gently leaned over and took them from her arms, "allow me."
"Thank you" she said as she blushed again, "May I ask where you're headed?"
"To LSE and yourself," hoping fervently that it was in the same direction.
"Not to far from that, I'm studying at the Royal College this summer."
"Are you still in University," he asked enjoying her rather musical voice, one with an accent that was decidedly English yet, infused with something else...
"Yes, although I go to school in the states at Rice University in Houston, I'm a third year."
"I've heard of it, a rather good school. I'm an Oxford man, graduated last year." He said almost sheepishly. Cautioning himself not to reveal too much.
"You look so familiar...in fact you almost remind me of..."
Felipe caught his breath, she would recognize him and reveal him; all his carefully laid plans, his one summer of freedom; all shot to hell because of his sudden infatuation with this girl.
"of my cousin" she finished, unaware of the tremendous sigh of relief that escaped him. She blushed as she thought that her cousin was not nearly as handsome as the stranger holding her books. She sneaked a glance at his beautifully cut jawline, his dark hair and azure blue eyes. She was surprised to see that he was looking at her!
"How do you like London?" she said attempting to divert his attention, for it was rather unnerving.
"I love it, although I must admit I've seen more of it the past couple of days that I've been here than the entire time I was in school, I used to go home to Spain at every holiday while at Oxford."
"Really, I've come to know quite a few of the sights rather well, especially my favorite ones. I used to live here as a child, and since I moved away I've visited often." She said with a smile as she looked upon her beloved city. They had quickly approached the Royal College and Felipe rather reluctantly handed her back her books.
"I would like...I would like to see you again if I may. Could I have your phone number?" He said his eyes filled with hope, yet he secretly battled with his head which screamed at him to stick with his resolve...to stay away from everyone...yet he was drawn to her.
She brightened, yet something appeared to stop her as she reached for her pen, a look of trepidation crossed her features and she shook her head as if chasing away some haunting memory. Felipe sensed her unease at giving him her phone number, he took a piece of paper and scribbled his number.
"Will you call me then" as he handed her the scrap of paper, a look of silent thanks crossed her face. Felipe realized that she didn't trust him...yet.
"I promise that I shall try." She said with a playful smile.
"Then I shall wait all day." Said he as she entered the building, turning to wave and flash a beautiful smile at him before she disappeared. Leaving Felipe to wonder how his life suddenly became so complicated...
II
Aaliyah turned the piece of paper in her hand over and over, it tempted her- yet she knew next to nothing about the handsome young stranger who had given it to her. He was charming, and she liked him careful, Aali remember what happened the last time you trusted a handsome stranger she shuddered at the memory and rolled the piece of paper into a ball ready to launch it into the trash bin. Yet, something stopped her hand. She took the piece of paper and smoothed it, laying it flat on her desk, noting the elegance of his hand as he scrawled the numbers on the paper. She resolved NOT to call him but to keep the number...well just in case. Five minutes later she was back quickly dialing the number and chiding herself for her lack of self-control.
"Hello, may I speak to Felipe" she said in a small voice
"This is he, may I ask whose calling"
"Aaliyah...I don't know if you remember me or not..."
"Of course I do, I'm so glad you called, I really did want to hear from you again."
"I'm glad I called again too" she said almost smiling into the receiver, "I was wondering if you were busy today, you mentioned that you don't know London...I thought I could show you around a bit." Aaliyah was shocked at how utterly forward she was acting, she had never made the first move let alone asked a guy out before!
On his end Felipe looked down at the bookbag slung on his shoulder, he had been just about ready to leave the house for his ten o'clock class. "No, I'm not busy at all, where do you live I can come pick you up?" He said as he tossed the bag into the corner of the room.
"Oh you don't need to do that," she said a little too quickly, she still doesn't trust me he thought with a sigh, "we could meet in front of LSE if that's convenient for you?"
"That's perfect, I'll meet you in twenty minutes. Bye"
"Bye" she said softly, wondering exactly what she had gotten herself into.
Felipe pulled his younger brother Eduardo's navy blue polo shirt over his head, it was a little snug and showed off his well developed torso and arms quite well. Coupled with khaki pants and loafers as well as Felipe's natural elegance he looked every bit the noble he was. He scratched at his beard thoughtfully, wishing that he could shave it off for he detested it's rather scruffy appearance but he was resingned to it since it was so temporary. Alas, there was one aspect of his appearance he had never, nor did he anticipate ever being able to, master; his unruly curls. He ran his hand through them only to create a greater frenzy than before, he threw up his hands in frustration only to note that he was precariously close to being late. He jogged down the stairs and down the street; stopping suddenly as he arrived in front of the lawn that stood before LSE.
There she was. She was beautiful. She stood there in front of the school dressed in a light pink, cap sleeved cotton sundress that reached the middle of her calves. It was demure yet alluring, conservative yet incredibly flattering. Felipe was completely besotten. Yet, her face so normally cheery now bore a pensive, almost poignant gaze as if her mind rested on some hidden sorrow that marred her normally blithe existence.
Her hair was held up in the same bun he had seen before, she removed a single pin and it came tumbling down in a straight, shining brown cape that cascaded down to her waist. As she shook it back from her face she noticed Felipe standing across the way, she raised her arm straight up in an enthusiastic wave; well what could Felipe do but return it with an enthused wave of his own before jogging to meet her.
As they stood face to face they realized for the first time how truly little they knew of one and another. Felipe finally broke the ice and the silence, "you look lovely Aaliyah."
"Aali, that's what my friends call me, and you do too, look lovely I mean...or rather look handsome." She stammered.
"Thanks," he said as he flashed what reporters called his 'million dollar smile' and offered her his arm which she took rather hesitantly, "Shall we begin?"
"Well we have two options," she said turning towards him, "we could go via subway" at which she wrinkled her nose in distaste, "or we could take the big red bus."
"Well, it is far too beautiful of a day to spend it underground." He said with a twinkle in his eye.
"The big red bus it is," she said referring to the large, doubledecker, open air tourist buses that stand on virtually every London street corner, "look there's one now, but I think that it's leaving."
"Then let's catch it" he said impulsively grabbing her hand and both breaking into a run towards the filling bus. Aali was surprised at the tingle that ran up her arm at his touch, and she looked down to see her much smaller hand enveloped in his larger one. They reached the bus just before it started to move, quite out of breath from both the exertion as well as laughter.
They climbed up the narrow winding steps to the roof of the bus and plopped down towards the front of the bus, Felipe enjoying the feeling of her silken strands of hair brushing against his arm. She was chattering away happily and pointing out the various sites, while Felipe stared at her, enthralled by her presence. He was soon brought back to earth by some question she asked; they were soon conversing merrily on every general topic under the sun from books to favorite cities to family history.
"So where do you get that distinct accent from" asked Felipe
"Well, do you want the long or short version of my family history?"
"give me the long"
"Alright, my family is originally from northern Afghanistan or what used to be part of Russia, they were par of the ruling dynasty and after my great-great-great-great-grandfather was disposed from the throne he fleed to India where my family lived until the partition in 1947, then my parent's immediate families moved to Pakistan. My parents both went to school in London, where I was born and lived for about eight years. Then we moved to Houston. Consequently my accent is mostly English, a little Texan, and a little Indian."
"That's amazing all the migrating your family did" he said while the rational man in him thought noble blood, mamma would be pleased
"What about your family, have they always lived in Spain?"
"Why yes, I love it there truly. The country itself is so beautiful, so picturesque. It has such culture and history, and the people...well the people are amazing: talk about hospitality and friendliness. And I so miss the lifestyle especially the afternoon siestas and the long lunches, aye." He said with a sigh.
"Hmmm. That sounds wonderful, no wonder you miss it so much..." she said leaning back against the seat.
"Oh, there are things I don't miss- like the press..." he said before realizing his slip.
"Why don't you like the press?"
because they hound me mercilessly "Oh because they're rather biased." He said quickly, looking over at her. Luckily she hadn't noticed anything amiss.
They soon discovered a mutual affection for The Godfather; and the other passengers on the bus were provided ample amusement from hearing some of the film's most famous line recited in a rather crisp Spanish accent. Indeed it was enough to ensure that Sonny was indeed spinning in his grave.
Felipe was shocked and almost elated at finding that Aali also adored a small budget art house film called 'Milagro en Roma' made in Spain that had touched Felipe deeply. So few people had actually heard of the film that Felipe considered it a sign from the fates that this girl was something special.
Indeed, Felipe had dated many a beautiful young lady before but most had been after the fame and notoriety associated with being 'Felipe's Forbidden Love'; the strange part was that the girls' ulterior motives hadn't really bothered him at the time. It was probably because he was just dating them to infuriate his family as some sort of teenage rebellion.
But Aaliyah was different. Felipe was pleased when she didn't really express any real interest in the royal family and that her pleasure was far greater with the magnificent architecture of the castles than with that of their occupants. Felipe was completely enchanted by her.
The day passed by far too quickly for both of them and although she still knew little to nothing about Felipe's life in Spain she could list his favorite books alphabetically and name all of his imaginary friends from childhood. Their similar dispositions had paved the way for a lovely friendship to blossom; consequently, two very happy hearts were found beating in their breasts as they walked back to Aaliyah's apartment.
"Are you free tomorrow, let's go see 'Rent' I heard it's amazing and I haven't had a chance to see it" said Felipe rather enthusiastically.
"Oh, lets; I waited in line for three hours to get tickets in Houston and couldn't get them, I do hope we can get some here." She said with such hope that Felipe privately resolved to have his personal secretary reserve the tickets in order to ensure their seats.
"What time shall I pick you up then, we should eat dinner before don't you think?" He asked as Aaliyah led him to the front gate of her apartment complex
"Well if the show starts at eight, how about 6 that should give us plenty of time."
"Perfect." He said as they reached her door, "That also describes this day, I can't tell you how much fun I had. Thank you" he said as he took her hand and placed a gentle kiss on the back of it.
"It was my pleasure, I had a wonderful time as well." She said blushing as she took back her hand, "I'm really glad I decided to call you." She said with a mischievous glint in her eye.
"Oh so you were considering not calling." He said with a grin.
"Well, let's just say I took pity on you...I mean you just gave me your phone number and I figured...hey what the heck." She said with an impish smile.
"Really" he said as he leaned in closer to her face.
"Really" she said softly as she felt his warm breath tickling her cheek.
He moved to kiss her but felt her press her hands against his chest, lightly pushing him away. He looked up to find tears welling up in her eyes, "I'm so sorry Felipe." She said covering her mouth with her hand as if to stifle a sob, "I'm sorry, I can't I just can't" she said as she turned away from him.
III
Felipe ever the gentleman was immediately repentant, "I'm sorry Aali, I didn't mean to offend you...Am I moving too fast...please forgive me..." he was stopped by her hand on his cheek.
"No, Felipe," she cried, "it's not you." She tried to calm herself, "I'm sorry...I understand if you don't want to see me again after acting so bizarre...it's just...it's just that..." She said shaking like a frightened bird.
something or someone has hurt this girl the very thought made Felipe's blood boil in anger. "Listen...I think that...I like you a lot...more than I've liked anyone in a long time... Wild horses couldn't keep me away...what's a few tears?" he said as he wiped the tears away from her cheek.
Aali smiled, amazed by the young man who stood before her he's different...he's different from Georgio "Thank you for being so understanding" she said her eyes shining. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek, "Goodnight."
"Goodnight" said a very confused Felipe. The evening had been so perfect, what had happened, had he done something wrong? These questions weighed heavily on him as he walked out of the corridor leading to her apartment. Suddenly, he heard footsteps behind him, he turned to see Aali, in a pair of fluffy pink slippers, walking towards him looking very resolute.
"Felipe, I like you too Felipe, and I think that I owe you an explanation for what just happened...do you have a minute?" She asked.
"I have all the time in the world" he said with a smile. She led him to a small bench by a fountain in the garden. After they sat down she looked a little loath to start speaking.
Finally she began a little haltingly, "You're the first guy I've allowed myself to feel anything for in more than two years...you see I've been to the continent before. The last time was two years ago when I went on a tour with my best friend and some other kids from school. It was wonderful, certainly one of the best experiences of my life. Well, it was wonderful until we reached Rome; it was towards the end of our tour and my group was rather tired. Consequently, we all slept in and missed the tour bus. We decided to explore the city ourselves and take the public bus; on our way back from the Vatican I gave up my seat to an elderly nun and stood. A man came up behind me and...and..." she said stammering and hanging her hand as if she was unable to look him in the eye, "and he molested me on the bus...up until that point it was the singularly most frightening thing that had ever happened to me...I wanted to scream to beat him, but I was frozen in fear. I kept moving up...trying to get away from him, but I couldn't. Finally, I almost got of the bus in the middle of nowhere, it was foolish but I couldn't think straight. Thank god, thank god that another man noticed what was going on and made the man get off the bus. I almost cried in relief." She said still speaking towards the ground, her shoulders shaking.
"But that's not all," she said looking up with tears in her eyes, which Felipe quickly wiped away, "I was shaken, but still able to keep a level head...as we were walking back to the hotel there was a group of young guys, Italians probably our age. One of them came up and asked me some questions, which I answered a little reservedly. They left, later that night we went to a dance at the hotel and the same young man asked me to dance. He was very handsome and charming and seemed like a nice guy so I said yes" she said as she shook her head in disbelief. "We danced, and it turned out he wasn't as nice at it seemed; he kept wanting me to go for a walk with him and I kept saying no. I managed to escape with a friend and we went to the elevator to go back to my room. His friends were waiting there for me to see which floor we were on. We left and ran into the bathroom, they tried to follow us but we locked the door. We finally managed to get to my room but they followed us up to our floor, finally one of my male friends- he's a football player at LSU, he's huge- told them to get lost. I thought I was safe...then...then that night he managed to sneak into my room through the balcony...he tried to rape me...I managed to kick him and scream for help. My friends broke down my door...he was arrested...I gave my statement to the police...we left the next day." She said in an eerily calm manner almost as if she had detached herself from the incident. Felipe drew her into his arms and the emotional wall that she had building up against him came tumbling down in a flood of tears. With each sob, Felipe saw more red; there wasn't a fiber in his body that didn't want to tear that monster limb from limb for hurting his precious Aali.
She spoke still enveloped in his arms, "I've been wary of guys after that, especially strangers. I met you on the street by chance just like Georgio- that was his name Georgio Wickhama- and you both had accents, and you were both handsome. I know it's terribly irrational; but I felt myself becoming more and more drawn to you as the evening went on. When you leaned in to kiss me I panicked." She said smiling up at him, "But I know that I can't hide from my life forever, I realized that it's time that I trusted again."
"You're the first person I've ever told this story to." She said the smile quickly evaporating from her face, "I couldn't bear my friend's pity and my parents are so protective. My safety is second to none in their eyes, even my happiness. If my dad ever found out about what happened in Rome he would have bought a shotgun and a ticket to Italy and locked me in my room for safekeeping." She said with a small smile.
"I feel like making such a purchase myself," said Felipe rather grimly.
"I didn't tell you that story for your anger or your pity Felipe," she said as she laid her head against his shoulder, "I told you because I...because I've begun to care for you...and I need some time."
"You can have all the time you need," he said kissing her on the top of her head while privately resolving to make sure that nothing would EVER hurt this girl again, "In fact you can have anything you want...Including me." He said with a grin.
"I don't know why I've been blessed to meet you Felipe, but I'm so happy that I was." Said Aali rising from the seat and reluctantly leaving his embrace.
"I'm glad you decided to take a chance on me," he said with a smile.
"I am too," she said as she reached up and stroked his face with her fingers, "until tomorrow"
"Goodnight" he said as he placed a gentle kiss on the palm of her hand.
There she was. She was beautiful. Every sight of her fairly took his breath away. Even in a simple black evening dress she looked incredible. Felipe adjusted his tie- it had taken him a good half an hour to find one without the Spanish Crest- as he came towards her planting a small kiss on her cheek. "Stunning as always Aali"
"The same goes for my handsome escort" she said with a smile, relieved that last night's incident hadn't made things awkward between them.
They made their way to the subway station fairly shaking with mirth over their discussion of the absurdities of English life. They reached the small italian restraunt they were eating at. It was breathtaking, with ivy crawling over everything and twinkling lights seemingly wrapped around every nook and cranny of the ceiling. While long ivory candles and ivory rose petals completing the ambiance. "It's perfectly lovely," she whispered to him as he led her to their table.
Easy conversation soon flowed between the two, finally resting on Felipe's history, a topic which Aali was frankly rather curious about.
"Do you have any siblings?"
"A younger brother Eduardo and a younger sister Sophia." He said with a smile, for he was exceedingly close to his younger siblings.
"Wonderful, what are they like?" she said eagerly.
"Sophia is a gem, she's funny and spunky, the press...is very interesting to her...she's thinking about going into journalism. She's a year younger than I am and engaged to a great guy she met in Greece" Prince Alexander of Greece was more than just a great guy...rather he was voted one of the world's most eligible bachelors...second only to Felipe "Eduardo and I are rather protective of her well-being; we grilled her fiance' for two hours the first time we met him, the poor chap almost wasted away in fear." He said stifling a laugh at the memory of Prince Alexander wiping his brow and looking for mercy from the assault of questions levied by the two brothers.
"Since Papa died, I've tried to act more as a father figure to them both, Yet G-D knows that I haven't been able to fill the void he left." He said a little sadly. "Mamma is actually head of the line so she had no problem taking over, but she wants to abdicate...and"
"abdicate?"
"Yes, abdicate her position as CEO of the business." He said inwardly cringing at his own stupidity.
"Oh"
"She want's me to take over...but I think Eduardo is so much better suited to the thr...the role of CEO."
"What kind of business is it that you're family is engaged in"
"You could call it a supplemental to the government"
"That's interesting, do you enjoy it?"
"As much as one can enjoy work I suppose...rather I like the duties and responsibilities associated with it, but I cannot stand the blasted publicity."
"Does one become a public figure in your line of work" she asked innocently
"Yes, definitely yes. " he said with a sigh, "Do you enjoy what you do?"
"Well, I love my majors in college, English and Linguistics. That's why I'm here this summer, studying Regency literature for the summer. This fall I'm going to Northern Africa to study linguistic differences in Arabic in different regions and doing medical relief work." A look of pure enthusiasm passed over her face and she leaned across the table, "Even though I'm majoring in these totally non-science related fields I'm planning on going into medicine"
"Medicine, really you don't strike me as the type that likes to pour over the biology texts much," he said with a grin.
"I don't although I don't mind it" she said smiling, "But to me, medicine is primarily about People. And I love people, just meeting with these amazing and wholly individual patients and their families is like a treat. It's never mundane or boring, the amazing thing is, is that they let you into their lives...and you're in a position to help them, to even give them a better life. It's a feeling unlike any other," she said as her face lit up with emotion and her hands moved expressively as she talked. Felipe could when asked later, pinpoint this exact moment as when he fell in love with her. Aaliyah was bubbling over with life, she emanated honesty and innocence and to Felipe at least, represented all that he loved of humanity.
The evening progressed beautifully with Felipe and Aaliyah learning more about one another and becoming far greater friends than either anticipated. The musical was wonderful, yet Felipe's enjoyment rested primarily with the looks of joy that passed over Aali's face rather than what occurred on stage. They sang songs from the play all the way back to her to her apartment, parting with a brief embrace and a chaste kiss on the cheek. Each going home to mull over the new and tumultuous feelings they were experiencing.
IV
The days past by much to quickly for both as Aaliyah grew to trust Felipe and he in turn grew to love her deeply. They spent evenings walking through the city and on the weekends they sometimes went on picnics to the small villages surrounding London. It was an altogether pleasant existence as they settled in to a happy groove of familiarity. Yet, Felipe was nagged by his conscience at not revealing his true identity to the woman he had grown to love.
Three weeks after they had first met Felipe arrived at Aaliyah's doorway bearing a bouquet of wildflowers and a picnic basket. "Where are we going," she said as she clasped her hands in enthusiasm. He shook his head in the negative and took a blindfold from his pocket and fastened it around her head and led her to the car he had rented.
They conversed throughout the ride but he evaded answering her questions until she finally gave up asking. The sounds of the city gradually died away and they enjoyed a rather comfortable silence. Aali soon fell asleep, when they reached their destination Felipe was sorely tempted to waken her with a kiss, but he restrained his emotion. she needs to trust me first...only then can she begin to return my affection . He kissed her hand and whispered in her ear "sleeping beauty we're here."
"Let me slip a bit longer Prince Charming." She said as her mouth curled into a smile and she snuggled deeper against the seat.
"What did you call me," said he in almost a whisper as he stiffened at the word 'Prince'
"If I'm Sleeping Beauty then you must be my Prince Charming." She said with a small chuckle, still half asleep. Felipe breathed a sigh of relief, I am a moron he thought with a sigh.
"Come on, we're here." He said pleadingly.
"Allright" she said a little grumpily to which Felipe smiled, glad to see a little imperfection in her. I'll make a note not to wake her early in the morning, he thought, how do you know that you'll ever get a chance, she doesn't even trust you...let alone love you. he said to himself cringing inwardly.
He helped her out of the car and untied her blindfold, the gasp of pleasure she gave was enough to make the drive worth it for Felipe. He had brought her to a mountainside just outside of Bath where the valley was covered by the same wildflowers he had brought her earlier. "It's incredible" she said to no one in particular, then turning to Felipe, "Thank you for bringing me here, it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
"It comes in as a distant second for me," he said as he gave her a look that clearly indicated whom he held first in his estimation. Aaliyah blushed at his attention, then hiking up the dress she wore with one hand and holding her straw hat with the other she raced down the mountainside into the flower filled valley. Spinning and skipping about almost like a small child, she was jubilant and to Felipe it was pure poetry in motion. He joined her in the fields and they threw flowers at each other until finally nestling in amongst them on a large flat rock to watch the clouds.
"That's a ballet dancer."
"That's clearly a bull fighter, how does one explain the large cloud to its right. Tell me that's not a bull."
"I think that it's a horse."
"So your ballet dancer is riding a horse."
"Well of course not don't be ridiculous, her Prince Charming is riding the horse- note the color of the cloud, it's white is it not." She said with a smile.
"I thought you said I was Prince Charming," he said with a pout.
"I said you were my Prince Charming," she said suddenly serious as she propped herself up on one elbow and looked down on him.
"Really?" he said smilingly
"Really" she said and leaned down and planted a sweet kiss on his lips. The ground moved, the sky shook, and Felipe was in heaven. The taste of her lips was more incredible than anything he'd ever experienced before. As she pulled away she had a bit of a grin on her face.
"I love you." He said it before he knew his lips were moving, for after that kiss his lips were no longer connected to his brain, they were floating somewhere in Aali Heaven...
"Oh, I was afraid you would say that," she said with a pout as she rolled onto her back. She got up and began pacing back and forth.
"What's wrong, I told you that I love you, I understand if you don't return my feelings right away...and I didn't want to tell you yet but..."
"Oh, I love you too, it's not that" she said absent-mindedly still pacing.
Felipe felt a little dizzy and leaned back against the rock for support. she loves me he thought still dazed. "Then what's the problem?" he asked scrambling to his feet and taking her hands.
"The problem is..." she said looking into his eyes, "G-D I'm so sorry for becoming involved with you I couldn't help myself...but this can't work."
"Why?" he asked as he searched her face for an answer.
"Because I'm an Indian and you're a Spaniard. Because I'm Baptist and you're Catholic...Because we're so different...because I live in America and you live in Spain" She said with a sigh.
"That's it, you told me that already...we can work through it...we can get past it." He said desperately, "Please we have to give this a chance" he said taking her chin in his hand, "you trust me right?" she nodded her head in a silent yes.
"Then no more talk of not being able to work this out." he said, she moved to speak some other objection but he silenced her with a long, deep kiss. For the moment at least, their worries and their fears were put aside and they were transported to a blissful place created from their deep mutual affection.
"Eduardo, you cannot believe what has happened to me, I am in love! She is incredible; beautiful and brilliant and so full of life..."
"Felipe, I'm sorry to interrupt you, but is this young woman by chance a Princess?"
"No"
"Of noble blood?"
"Well, no..."
"A Spaniard?"
"No"
"Felipe, Mamma is not going to happy, in fact she's going to be furious. She's been spreading the rumor that you and Princess Louisa of Wales are an item."
"I hardly know that girl, and what I do know I don't particularly like," said Felipe with no little indignation, "besides, it doesn't really matter...Mamma has been on my back to find a girl that I like, and I've found one...Aaliyah is incredible."
"I don't doubt that Felipe. But is she prepared to face the outcry when the news of your relationship goes public."
"Well...she doesn't know yet."
"Doesn't know how harsh the public and the press can be?"
"No, she doesn't know who I am yet. She thinks I'm just a regular guy from Spain whose family works with the government"
"Felipe, You must tell her soon, because if she finds out...you'll lose her hombre, no woman likes to be kept in the dark like that"
"I'll tell her...I've been working up the courage do it. I was going to before...but I fell in love with her, I couldn't bear the thought of the one woman I've fallen for falling for my status rather than falling for me. I don't care if every woman in the world loves 'Felipe the Playboy' or 'Felipe the Heartthrob' I just wanted for once, for her to love Felipe the man."
"But she loves you right."
"I think so, I don't know why though, I'm so not worthy of her...She's beautiful, witty..."
"Spoken like a man really in love, I haven't heard anyone with it this bad since Alexander asked us for Sophia's hand."
"I'm not as bad as that pansy am I?" said Felipe with a chuckle referring to name the brothers had given their friend after his love-stricken performance.
"No hombre," said Eduardo with a groan you're much worse! he thought. "Felipe you mentioned that she's not a Spaniard, is she English."
"No not really,"
"Portugease"
"Latin American" said Eduardo pleadingly, "Please tell me she's Spanish speaking Felipe."
"She can speak it, she learned in school"
"She's not American is she?"
"She lives in America...She's Indian Eduardo."
"Felipe you realize that Mamma is going to have a myocardial infarction when she hears about this."
"A what?"
"A heart attack you moron, sometimes I'm amazed that you're in next in line to take over..."
"Ok, ciayate" then mulling for a moment, "what Mamma doesn't know won't kill her, I'm going to ask Aali to marry me and then I'll tell Mamma- simple as that. She'll have to accept it then because I'll leak it to the press and the last thing she wants to do is cause scandal."
"Good luck big Brother, because you'll need it," sighed Eduardo over the phone.
"Eduardo, could you courier over the Star of the Armada, it's in my safe. Mamma gave it to me while I was dating Princess Marionissa in hopes that I would propose."
"Allright, it should get to you sometime tomorrow evening." He said with a sigh, "Adios, Felipe"
"Adios"
As Felipe flipped off his cell phone, he walked over to the bathroom. He was resolved, he would tell her the truth- or rather show her. He took his signet ring with the Royal Crest and slipped it onto his finger. He hadn't worn it since he had come to London, and it was a little snug. He scratched his beard, he had grown a little fond of it. Felipe picked up the razor looking at it with both hope and trepidation, saying softly "no more secrets" as he brought it to his face.
IV
"Good morning" she said as he opened the door.
"What are you doing here, I was about to go pick you up" he said as a smile spread across his face.
"You shaved your beard," she cried, "I rather liked it," she said with a smile as her hand drew up and caressed his cheek. "You know I never knew that the man I fell in love with was so handsome." She said as she kissed his neck.
"Oh, so you fell in love with my mind madam."
"I fell in love with all of you," she said as he drew her into his embrace.
After they separated he brought her arm within his, "let's go for a walk, I have something I'd like to tell you."
"What is it?" she said her eyes sparkling with mischief.
"It's about my family...remember how I was a little vague earlier..."
"Oh dear, you're not going to tell me you're part of some type of Spanish Mafia are you?" she said with a sigh, "I was wondering how you could quote 'The Godfather' with such ease." She giggled.
"I'm not part of the Mafia," he said in mock horror, "although, I do confess...I do hold certain powers of persuasion." He said as he planted a kiss on her shoulder.
"I highly doubt that you could persuade me to do anything against my will Sir." She sighed as he planted a kiss on her neck, then one on her lips.
"I said you could not persuade me to do anything that I didn't want to do to begin with," she said, "I quite approve of this activity." She whispered before returning his kiss. "Mmmm...didn't you want to tell me something"
"I forgot," he said breathlessly.
"your family" she squeezed in between kisses.
"Oh yes...marvelous people must introduce you sometime...now where were we."
"Felipe" she cried pulling away, "no more of this till you tell me what you wanted to say."
"Allright," he sighed, "You see Aali...my family is in government...have you heard of the Tudor line in England?"
"Why of course"
"Well, there is a similar line in Spain called the 'de la Guerva'" he said as a large drop of water plopped onto his head.
"I see" she said as a couple of drops of water slid down her face, "Darling do you think this conversation could be continued inside."
"In there?" he said with a gulp as he looked at a very proper English Cafe, if such a thing exists.
"Why not?" she asked looking at him curiously.
"Why not indeed" he said swallowing as they entered the empty establishment. Felipe breathed a sigh of relief, thankful for small favors. They ordered some lattes and settled into a booth.
"Now, you were saying,," She prompted as the door jangled open and someone entered the empty cafe.
"FELIPE!" cried a high pitched voice, as a stunning young woman with body to die for and countenance to match strode in through the door and planted a large kiss on his lips. "Darling, I haven't seen you in ages...how long has it been three years."
"Henrietta...what are you doing here." He almost whispered as he paled at the sight of her.
"Felipe don't you read the papers, I'm here to be married to the Duke of Derby. Remember I always told you that I wouldn't settle for less than an Earl, especially after I let a Prince slip out of my fingers."
"Really" he said barely whispering.
"Felipe, what kind of reception is this for an old flame like myself." She said in her thick Dutch accent, "or have we grown apart so much that you would like me to call you 'Crown Prince Felipe Fredricko Augusto Marchionesso de la Guerva' or rather 'your Royal Highness' she said with a mock bow.
"Felipe what is she saying." Said Aali in a whisper.
"Who is this Felipe?" cried Henrietta, "she's rather lovely...A fine conquest...I compliment you on your addition to your legions of beauties" she smiled almost maliciously.
The attendant of the Cafe waddled over to their table. "Forgive me Your Highness, I thought I recognized you...I'm the Propritier of this establishment...my wife is one of your subjects and she and my daughters are very loyal...do you think I could get an autograph Your Grace."
Throughout all this, the voices of the owner and Henrietta had become peripheral to Felipe all he was concentrating on was Aali's face. It went from a state of shock at Henrietta's appearance to disbelief. She kept looking at Felipe hoping for some denial, some explanation, yet none was forthcoming. She looked as if she had been slapped in the face. "I thought you looked familiar" she mumbled to herself, "I can't believe I trusted...will I never learn," she said in a dazed whisper.
"Felipe...is it true," she began, looking up at him.
"Let me explain Aali"
"Just tell me are you Felipe Fredericko son of a business owner in Barcelona."
"No" he swallowed.
"Are you Crown Prince Felipe de la Guerva of Spain" she said in a whisper.
"Yes" he whispered.
Her face fell, and the look that passed over her features stung Felipe more than a thousand tears or countless sobs of betrayal ever could. It was a look of pure disallusionment, she looked past him, unwilling to allow him to see the hurt in her eyes, "I trusted you" she whispered as she ran out of the Cafe and into the rain...
Chapter VII
'Where is he?' she thought, a little perturbed. She looked down at her watch again, suddenly the ear-piece of her headphones was pulled out of her ear and a sweet voice whispered, "Did you miss me?"
"Of course" she cried, turning around on the bench, to face him and give him a quick kiss as he kneeled down behind her.
"What are you listening to" he asked, she took out an ear piece and stuck it in his ear.
"Indian music, now tell me what words you can pick out." She had been teaching him Hindi and was very pleased by his ability to pick up the language so quickly.
"Alright," he said with a smile, "Kabhie- means sometimes" she gave him a happy kiss, "Sometimes, the thought comes to me that you were made for me." He asked
She nodded and continued while looking into his eyes, "sometime before you were lodged somewhere in the stars, you were called here just for me." She paused, "that your smile, your eyes are all my soul's desire, that your looks and your presence are my peace of mind." He smiled at her lovingly, "sometimes, my heart gets the inkling that you'll love me forever too, that you'll look upon me with tender affection, I know that you're a stranger...will you love me truly?"
"That was so beautiful" he said as he stroked her cheek.
"Yes, the lyrics of Indian Songs are pure poetry."
"Oh, the song was nice too." He said as he kissed her.
She batted him away in mock consternation, "weren't you even listening" she said with a sigh.
"How about this, the answer is yes."
"What," she asked a little confused.
"You asked me if I'd love you truly always, my answer is yes; I will marry you."
"But I didn't ask..."
"Ooh, are you about to rescind your offer, I don't think I can bear it." He said flopping down to the ground comically.
"Felipe what are you talking about?"
"Well, if you're going to be obstinate and pretend you have no prior knowledge of your own proposal, and the fact that I'm already down on my knees, I suppose I'll just have to ask. Aali, will you make the world's happiest man and do me the great honor of becoming my wife?" he asked as he pulled from his pocket a box small enough for only one thing....
We need hardly doubt her answer and the fact that it was followed by many kisses and innumerable tears. As soon as the two lovebirds had settled down, sure that their happiness at this moment could only be equaled by a life long together, Felipe slipped a ring onto her finger.
"It's beautiful," she said with a smile, as she examined the large light blue diamond set in the antique gold setting, "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
"It still comes in a distant second." He said with a grin. "It's called the Star of the Armada, Legend says that it was being transported from England secretly for the young Spanish Princess by an English nobleman in love with her. The ship sank and they thought with it went the ring and the nobleman's proposal to the young princess. She was heartbroken, for she believed that he had no inclination to marry her and consequently she married another courtier. He didn't know the ship sank and thought she had refused him. Many years later, he found the ring being sold by a street peddler. He inquired how it came into his possession, the peddler reluctantly told him that he had received it as part of a winnings from a bet with a drunk pirate who confessed to having stolen the ring from the sinking ship. The young nobleman paled and went straight to Spain. It was far too late then for the princess had already married, heartbroken the nobleman sent her a letter detailing the events which led to their unfortunate separation, and gave her the ring inscribed with 'Never doubt that I love you.' They say that princess wore the ring till her dying breath."
Aali wiped away a tear, "that was so sad, promise me you'll never be so foolish." She said with a smile.
"Only if you promise not to marry someone else in my absence," he said with a smile. he remembered later that she never did promise...
"I have something to tell you that isn't quite as pleasant," he said with a frown. "I have to go to Spain for a few days, my mother has an engagement out of the country and consequently I have to take over the royal duties for a few days."
"When are you leaving?" she said petulantly.
"Tonight" she moved to protest, but closed her mouth. "and I have to go pack"
"if that's what you have to do" she said with a brave smile, "besides I have to go home and call my family, they're going to flip. Oh, Felipe they'll love you and I'm sure that you'll love them. They'll want to meet you, before the wedding..." She stopped, "I can't believe that, our wedding...I can't believe that we're going to be married" she said in an awed voice.
"I know sweetie, it seems...it seems like a happy dream" as he gazed upon his beloved completely and utterly content with his life.
Aali turned the knob of the door and entered her apartment, she heard a noise and her heart stopped. She turned around and saw a middle-aged woman of extraordinarily regal carriage dressed in an expensive looking gown seated on her sofa. "You must be Aaliyah...you seem fair enough...although I've seen prettier."
Aali was stunned, who was this woman seated in her apartment.
"You do not recognize me...I am not surprised, such is the ignorance of Americans." The woman almost spat with distaste, "I am Queen Russelia de la Guerva of Spain...your Felipe's mother." She looked at Aali's hand and appeared to be pained at the sight of the Star of the Armada on her finger. "So that fool already proposed to you" she said.
"Yes, he asked me to marry him this morning" she said as a happy smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.
"You understand do you not, that his country, his people, his family, and especially his mother will NEVER condone this match. He is the Crown Prince of Spain, you are a commoner...an American, whose parents were immigrants from a third world country. You...marry my son, not only is it out of the question...but it laughable. Spain deserves far more than you can even dream of providing it."
Aali's blood boiled, yet she kept her tone even, "as far as I know Your Highness, I am not engaged to his country, nor his people, nor his family, nor am I engaged to you. I am engaged to Felipe and he obviously feels that I am worthy of him. In my estimation that is all that matters." She said her head held high.
"So you are determined to have him. Well, you may rest assured that although I can not stop him from marrying I can take away his inheritance, his livlihood, and his crown. You will marry a pauper."
"I will marry my Felipe, rich or poor; it doesn't matter to me. I fell in love with him before I knew who he really was. He revealed his true identity to me last night. I don't want anything but him, not your money nor your crown." She said calmly.
"So you truly love him," said the Queen sweetly, "Your only desire must be to see him happy."
"Yes" she whispered, fearful of where this conversation was leading.
"Do you think he would be happy giving up everything he's grown to expect. Do you think he would be happy leaving his people? Do you think he would be happy to leave his homeland in disgrace? My son is an honorable man, if he has promised to marry you no amount of reason will convince him to break the engagement. But rest assured he will be miserable being torn from the nation he loves. Rest assured that he will become bitter to his situation in life. Rest assured that he will come to hate you."
Aali was silent, the woman's words spun in her head...they were truthful for she had often recalled Felipe's declarations of love for his country. Would he be happy if forced to give it up?
The Queen smiled at Aali's consternation, "My son is foolish but he is also young. He has no concept of the responsibilities his crown places upon him; especially the necessity of his alliance with someone of his own standing. Someday he will make an excellent King, his people already adore him. There is only one thing that stands in his way, do you know what that is?"
Aali shook her head.
"It is you...You stand between Spain and her King, between my son and his destiny." She looked at the shaken girl before her, "All you have to do is free him of the engagement so that it appears as if it is of your own free will with no mention of this meeting, or his status. For if you do not, he will not relinquish you, and if he does not relinquish you he will dig his own grave." With that she rose and began to stride out of the room, turning to say "I trust you'll do what's best for HIM." She said before leaving the apartment.
Aali sunk to the floor with her head in her hands. The decision that weighed on her settled finally down to a single question, 'his happiness or her's?" For a woman in love it was easy to discern the answer to that question; for she would rather live in misery for a lifetime than cause him a moment's unease. She was resolved...but she would allow herself one boon...to see him one last time before letting him go. With her eyes shining with unshed tears she ran out her apartment towards his.
"Felipe" she called as she saw him get into the limo that would take him to Heathrow, dear God let him hear me
His head popped out at the sound of her voice and he stepped out in time to catch her in his waiting arms, "what's wrong Aali," he asked concerned.
"Nothing...now." she said as her head was buried in his chest, as she savored the feeling of his arms around her. She kept her tone level, "I just came to kiss you Goodbye and tell you that I love you." She said sweetly.
"Oh dear...if you do that you're going to make it really difficult for me to leave," he said as he kissed his beautiful fiance'.
She memorized the feel of his skin, the smell of his hair, the taste of his lips; storing them all away for the dismal future alone that awaited her. After one final kiss she waved him off; her heart heavy.
She slowly walked to her apartment and sat down at her desk, taking a piece of stationary from a box, as she did so her eye fell on the Star of the Armada. She took off the ring and began to write
Dear Felipe...
Part VI or rather The Aftermath
Dear Felipe,This letter will come as a surprise to you no doubt. But what I'm about to say has been weighing on my mind for sometime now. I was just too afraid of hurting you to reveal it. I'm not ready to marry yet, I'm really not ready to abandon my freedom...especially to someone whom I've barely known for a month or two. Further more, I don't have very much faith in our long term compatibility. We're too different for our relationship to work.
Your revelation did nothing to ease my worries. I do care for you Felipe; but...I...well, quite frankly I just don't love you enough to subject myself to all the pain and frustration aligning myself to you would provide.
Your friend,
Aaliyah.
Her hands shook as she wrote the last part, but she was resolute. She carried it to his apartment slowly, savoring each moment before she would break the heart of the man she loved more than life itself.
I'm standing between Felipe and his destiny she approached his door.
An alliance with me would only make him miserable in the long run she kneeled by the door.
I'm doing this for his happiness was her final thought before she slipped the letter beneath the door.
Yet, these thoughts didn't prevent her from feeling as if she had just let go of everything that made her life worth living. She walked back to her apartment with the resolution of a woman who had just put the best part of her life behind her, she entered the door and began to pack her things. Her eye fell on the Star of the Armada and for the first time she began to cry...
This is not happening. Felipe's happy world had come crashing down about him as he read Aali's letter. It's not true...It can't be true...she swore that she loved me. Felipe's feet had hit the pavement as soon as he had read the letter.
Never doubt that I love you Felipe
This is not happening. He came into view of her apartment
I don't think I could go through life without you
This is not happening. There are movers in front of her building. Dear God
Any life of mine without you would be half-lived indeed.
This is not happening. Her apartment is almost empty.
I love you Felipe
This is not happening. She's gone.
The movers had managed to put everything away, and the apartment was empty except for the small writing desk, probably where she wrote the letter. It was over, the best thing that he'd ever had was over. I don't love you enough... .
A mover came in, "Do you know how long ago she left?" he asked with a pained expression.
"I think she left a few hours ago, we're just finishing up." The man looked at him curiously, "Hey you're not Felipe are you?"
"Yes, that's me."
"Great," the man brightened, "This saves me a trip. She left something for you."
Felipe drew in a breath...another letter...a forwarding address...a sign saying this was some big joke. Yet, what the man pulled from his pocket made Felipe's face turn ashen...it was a box, a box so small it was big enough for only one thing...
six and a half years later
"It gives me great pleasure to announce the alliance between the great nations of Spain and England by announcing the engagement of my son Crown Prince Felipe de la Guerva to Princess Louisa of Wales." The crowd broke into applause as Felipe approached and placed the ring on Louisa's finger.
Aali switched off the television, and went up to her bedroom. The silence that filled the house was deafening, especially compared to the laughter of a happy toddler that had filled it only a year before. It seemed like every time she could grasp happiness it disappeared and she would be alone again...now like every night for more than a year she cried herself to sleep...
Chapter VII or rather The Hunger of Memory
seven years later
The countryside rolled by, the fields filled with wildflowers. Felipe popped the CD into the drive and pushed the offending curls from his brow. Even now, his locks were just as unmanageable and unruly, combined with his trim, lean build he was universally proclaimed to not look a day over 25. Yet, at 30 age and circumstance had indeed taken their toll. On closer inspection one could discern the fine lines about his mouth that sorrow had etched with the finest of tools. Yet, these remainder's of former pain could only be observed when the silly grin that was usually plastered on his face in public was wiped away. For the public Felipe had remained unchanged, the same the boyish, charming, young prince that men admired and women adored. His laughter rang out at public events, his charm oozing through the room; indeed the public man remained unscathed by any former heartache.
Yet, the private Felipe was an entirely different matter. For the joyous laughing lad of 23 had long since been replaced by a somber man of 30. His affable manner was put aside by a melancholy reticence that no amount of joviality could shake. The lad that once spoke volumes in a single sitting had taken to solitary drives about the countryside and long walks alone about the palace grounds. Yet, if one had the great fortune to chance upon him during his solitary reverie, one would notice the perpetual frown wiped from his face and replaced by a look of unadulterated joy as his eyes held a faraway, nostalgic gaze. For the moments when Felipe was left to himself and his memories were his happiest. He was no longer the morose man of 30 scarred by disappointment wandering the Spanish countryside; he was again the blithe young lad of 23 in London wholly consumed by love.
Even now as his car skimmed the roads, he was lost in his own recollections. Every time he closed his eyes she was before him, he could still feel her silken strands upon his skin, and the taste of her lips was fresh upon his own. She not only haunted his dreams she invaded his thoughts; there were moments- sometimes in a posh ball or even a busy Barcelona street- that he could hear her laughter tinkling or voice at his side.
It was not as if he had not endeavored to rid himself of these memories. Although she had invaded his every pore he had tried to expunge her. G-d knows he had tried by dating every supermodel and noblewoman from here to China. Yet, with each he found fault: if she were beautiful she was brainless; if witty and brilliant she was unfeeling; if gentle and unassuming then she was as dull enough to put him to sleep. It was all to no avail; he had met perfection personified, and he had lost her. Soon he had abandoned all efforts to put her from his mind and settled into a comfortable, if melancholy relationship between himself and his memories of her.
His engagement to Louisa was as great of a farce as his public persona. At 25 she was at a suitable age for marriage and his mother was constantly hounding him Felipe, you have no concept of the responsibilities your crown places upon you; especially the necessity of your alliance with someone of your own standing. She understood his indifference and returned it twofold. Her marriage was merely something to be looked upon as a convenience, she had made it painfully clear to him at the beginning of the relationship that she would bear him an heir but beyond that their relationship would remain what it truly was; a political alliance. She was still very much the foolish, rash, rebellious hellion she had been in her youth. Even know he was in England to visit the doctors who had cared for her during her injury. She had taken a lover, some Captain...Captain Benley or Benick or something and had been out riding by bath when she had fallen and injured her back while he was away on a foreign relations trip in Asia. She had recovered after a week and been transported to London; yet, her recovery had been based greatly on the wonderful work by the doctors in the hospital of Bath. Now he was forced to appear there in a show of great emotion as if her wellness was foremost on his mind; and the work of the doctors was his greatest miracle.
Her response to his proposal had been a flippant, 'might as well,' even now he could not think upon that proposal without reflecting on a very different one seven years ago. The ring he had given her had been one dug from Spanish crown jewels, an ancient priceless piece entwined of gold, diamonds and rubies. His mother had not questioned his decision, assuming that the Star of the Armada had been lost to THAT woman. Queen Russelia had often thought it far too plain for a future monarch anyhow.
When Aali had returned the ring to Felipe by courier so many years ago, his first impulse had been to toss into the abyss of the Thames. Yet the realization that it was the only remaining item he had left of his beloved stopped his hand. Instead, the ring became his most prized possession, for it had rested upon her finger albeit briefly. Now the Star of the Armada hung on a thin chain about his neck, close to his heart where his memories of their brief yet blissful summer together were kept.
His visits to Louisa in England had been difficult at best; yet her shrewish behavior was not the only cause, in addition the memories that hung at every corner taunted and tormented him. Now he was driving to Bath Bath visions of that perfect day were still crystal clear in his mind. He was slowly approaching that very place he had brought her long ago, indeed he had made quite a few pilgrimages the year after she had left him. He stopped the car, and slowly got out wondering all the while what masochistic tendency induced him to do so. He slowly made his way to the large rock and stretched out upon it, yet even the day was different. Whereas that had been blue of sky and white of cloud, today was a uniform gray that stretched out across the wide expanse of sky as if the heaven's were about to let loose a torrential downpour of tears.
Chapter VIII or rather One is the Loneliest Number
"Mama" came Maria's sweet, murmur.
She could hear Charles crooning a lullaby to her in the car.
The smashed glass. The screams.
Aali awoke with a start, and like it had every morning for the past five years her left arm snapped to her side to wake Charles. Yet Charles was neither there nor was it morning. She rolled to her side and cast her gaze upon the clock as it blinked 4:17 p.m. in bright green flourescence against the darkness of the room. I've taken to sleeping during the day she thought with a sardonic chuckle as she rolled out of bed and meandered into the bathroom, still dressed in the clothes she'd worn to bed the night before. the blue scrubs now horribly faded and practically threadbare she treasured them. During her first year away from London she swore she could still smell his distinctive scent of cologne and English soap on them.
As she entered the bathroom her eyes naturally fell to where Charles' toiletries had been and as she pulled away her gaze it rested on a squat little bottle filled with amber fluid amidst her tall elegant ones. the Cologne she had always adored Felipe's scent, mostly because it suited him so well. She had purchased a small vial a few hours before...before his mother had made her untimely appearance. Amidst the uproar and commotion the small bottle had become quite lost until she had found it amongst her things a few months later in New York. Now the vial stood in it's place of honor amidst her bottles. Charles had never remarked upon it, just as she had never questioned his picture of Mary upon his desk, yet the vial had stood there between them all those years a testament to the only man who ever truly held her heart.
She washed up and changed into a sundress, carefully putting away the scrubs. As she left the room and entered the hallway she faced the prospect of walking by Maria's room. Her family had visited a few month's ago horrified to realize that Aali hadn't changed anything, leaving it in almost a shrine like manner. They had packed up all their things and put them away in the attic, now all that was left were a few of Maria's toys that stood nobly upon Aali's dresser and the room itself. She and Charles had papered it a few month's before she was born, a light blue with fluffy white clouds and blue and white lace curtains. Now the room mocked her with its silence and taunted her with its insincere cheer. A few weeks ago she had marched in armed with paint stripper and scissors to expunge any trace of the memories that lingered there, yet she could not do it. Now it stood there, an island of sunshine in a house filled with gloom. Aali turned and raced down the stairs as if the devil himself were hot on her heels.
She padded softly into the kitchen and opened the cupboards to see slightly enough to start supper, yet what was the point in cooking for one? It had been almost a year since she had been to the grocery store with a cart and all. The last time she had gone she had rushed there after work, loading up on tons of necessities for starting dinner, picking up a package of that dreadful English pudding that Charles adored. Yet, realization only hit her as she reached for a bottle of Maria's strained plums and then she had to be helped from the store in a fit of near hysterics. Since then she'd been taking some sleeping pills that Elliot had prescribed and had her groceries delivered. She'd managed to wean herself off the pills quite aware of how destructive such a habit could be, and now took them only during a particularly stressful occasion.
Yesterday had been such a day, for Maria would have turned three. Usually she had connived to be working on their birthdays yet for some reason she had this weekend off to mull about in sorrow. Before the accident, a weekend off had been the highlight of her month, she would wait for it with enthusiasm and plan it zealously. Sometimes when Charles could join them the three of them would go away for a weekend. When he could not she and Maria would spend the three lovely days together...Aali would read to her daughter, play with her in the garden...take her to the park...it was an altogether blissful existence. Now all vacation days served to do was remind her what a shambles her personal life was in.
She pulled a box of cereal from the shelf and took out a carton of milk from the fridge pouring herself a bowl and settling in the living room. She looked through the mail and found this week's Time Magazine, one of Charles' prescriptions that she had never bothered to cancel. Flipping through the magazine and suddenly she was face to face with a picture of Felipe with his smiling fiance' on his arm. The old pang she felt at seeing his picture returned with a force, for seven years of separation had not lessened her love for him one bit. She had wished a thousand times that she had never written the letter...that she had faced the storm by his side. Yet, his happy smile and contented countenance reassured her that she had done the right thing. Thus, for what seemed the millionth time, she received some solace in his smile...
Aali turned away from the magazine and tossed the remainder of her cereal down the garbage disposal, her appetite shot. She quickly gave the house the once over ensuring it was clean. Yet, despite her best efforts she couldn't' seem to shake it's inpenetrable gloom. A strange sense of claustrophobia seemed to overpower her as the memories that lodged about it were about to stop her very breath. She slipped on her shoes and ran outside, the grayness of the day enfolding her into it's midst.
Chapter IX or rather Visions of Yesterday
"That's a ballet dancer."
"That's clearly a bull fighter, how does one explain the large cloud to its right. Tell me that's not a bull."
"I think that it's a horse."
"So your ballet dancer is riding a horse."
"Well of course not don't be ridiculous, her Prince Charming is riding the horse- note the color of the cloud, it's white is it not." She said with a smile.
"I thought you said I was Prince Charming," he said with a pout.
"I said you were my Prince Charming,"
The conversation rang as clearly in Felipe's ears as it had almost seven years ago. Yet, it was not seven years ago, nor was his Aali lying beside him. He was alone, in a secluded place from his past waiting for the rain.
The cool breeze blew against her skin as she held her body against the wind. Here she was free, alone with nature immune to her memories. She expunged her mind from thought and instead welcomed the icy drops of rain against her skin. Her body, her very soul was tired. Not from the sleeping pills nor from late nights...circumstance and sorrow had worn her to the bone and she simply couldn't shoulder much more.
She didn't want to seem ungrateful, for life had given her a great deal; a warm and loving childhood, a wonderful family, a sincere and unshakable friendship with a man she was privileged enough to call her husband, a child more precious than life itself, and one true, enduring love. Yet fate had contrived to take all these things away. Now she was alone, and she was tired of being of lonely.
She was tired of the dull ache that she felt every time she thought of Charles. She was tired of longing for her dearest little girl. She was tired of wishing for what might of been with Felipe. She was tired of her memories, and tired of having only them to keep her warm at night. She wasn't just tired of living, she was tired of living her life.
Felipe heard a rustle in the flowers behind him, Felipe's head raised slightly from the rock and he cocked it slightly to the left. Curious to the presence and a little afraid of recognition, for after his engagement his face was almost visible in England as in Spain, he rose to meet his visitor.
Aali saw that someone had already occupied her beloved rock, she moved to start back and dropped her glasses. She leaned down and as she did the head of the occupant came into view. His tousled brown curls graced the surface and his lean form was stretched elegantly across the rock. She froze, that hair, that body...if she had had any control whatsoever over her body she would have turned and ran into his arms, had her mind any say she would have jettisoned in the opposite direction as fast as her legs could carry her. Yet, at present the only thing that seized her was a single thought that somehow found it's way to her lips,
"Felipe"
It was if he suddenly appeared when she needed him most.
A form stood a good distance away, a girl doubled over looking for something amidst the flowers. As Felipe's eyes focused he noticed the fine line of her body...he could have sworn...no. Yet, as she straightened, his breath caught in his throat, it was another hallucination...surely it was not her...it couldn't be. She opened her mouth as if to speak and Felipe felt his legs seemingly turn to jelly. The rain that was falling lightly was inconsequential, the wind was insignificant, for that matter so was Louisa, and indeed the rest of the outside world; all that mattered now was that he was with his Aali.
It was if she suddenly appeared when he needed her most.
They stood there for what seemed like an eternity, neither moving nor speaking their eyes merely soaking up each other. Yet, the inside world could not be peripheral forever and as the rain began to beat down with greater force Aali moved towards him motioning for him to follow her to cover. Within a few moments he was by her side and just the feel of her presence at his elbow made his breath raspy and his head light.
A thousand questions tumbled from his brain along with the desire to silence all his thoughts by merely taking her in his arms and kissing away any lingering doubts. Yet, only one managed to fall from his lips, "You left...how could...why?" was all that he managed to choke out.
"It was a long time ago Felipe," cried Aali, her eyes glazing over with tears, "I saw your pictures with Louisa" she said quietly, "I guess what I did was for the best....You are happy aren't you Felipe?" she asked with such passion- as if her entire world depended on an affirmative answer.
Felipe wasn't sure if it was resentment or a sincere desire to satisfy her every wish but before he knew it he heard his voice say, "Yes, I am very happy with Louisa," he heard a sigh of relief emanate from her.
"I live just around the corner here," she said motioning to a beautiful little house so like the resteraunt they went to on their first date that it made his throat sting. They ran into the house shaking off the cold each fighting the feeling to take the other into a passionate embrace. Yet, between them stood the confusion of one and the unshakable resolve of the other.
IX or rather The Circle of Time
Felipe gazed upon his beloved as if she would disappear into thin air. She was as breathtaking as ever, her every feature still exuded perfection, yet...yet, there was something...'twas the eyes...those that had once sparkled with life now where dulled with pain.
She gazed upon him with equal relish, he was even more beautiful than she remembered, and he was here before her at last...
Felipe longed to envelop her in his arms and kiss her worries away.
It took every fiber of her resolve to keep from throwing her arms about his neck.
He stepped before her the longing that had been building in him for the past seven years breaking free of it's floodgate and surging to the surface.
She placed her hands on his arm, a surge filtered through her soul at his touch. The smoothness of his skin, the tautness of his muscle beneath, her hand moved down into his.
It was still the satiny smooth palm he'd felt all those years ago, Felipe felt complete. He realized that his emptiness rested in hollow of his palm, for her hand had always been there, and now he was whole once more.
"You're all wet," she whispered. Each recognizing the line she had uttered so many years ago. The irony of the situation brought a small chuckle fourth from the depths of Felipe's throat yet it had no mirth, rather it was filled with all the sorrow of the past seven years.
Aali felt the last shred of her resolve flitter away, yet as she did her finger grazed the ring of the royal crest that encircled his finger. It was if she were stung, she released his hand and pushed her hair behind her ear, bowing her head as she went around him. "I'll bring you some dry things," she called to his back.
Felipe sunk to the ground, why was fate taunting him after all these years? He leaned his head back against the wall, half in thought, half in prayer. Every psychiatrist from here to the Continent had sworn upon their sacred texts of psychology that another meeting would only bring closure. Closure They had emphasized that the old love would melt away to an indifference.
They were wrong.
Every part of him ached for her touch, she still made his toes tingle, and his head light. His heart was more hers than when she had crushed it seven years before.
"Here you go," she said barely audible...yet she didn't offer him the blue scrubs...she couldn't allow him to realize how much he had...how much he still meant to her.
He scrambled up, his eyes still plastered to her face soaking in every contour of her cheek, every highlight of her hair. "Thanks," he mumbled.
"You're welcome, there's a bathroom at the end of this hallway." She managed to choke out.
Felipe walked there in a daze, the same sense of disconcertion that had enveloped him since he'd laid eyes upon her once more. The disconcertion probably stemmed from the inability to feel the floor beneath him, for Felipe was floating on Cloud 9.
The bathroom was perfectly decorated and smelled of wildflowers. wildflowers their smell had haunted him across the continent. He slipped on the clothes, a little short on his tall frame.
And for a brief moment allowed himself to imagine that this was his home. For the palace held no grandeur for him without her by his side, the grounds no wonder without her hand in his. Wherever she was, was home for him.
He opened the door and stepped into the hallway, noticing it was lined with framed pictures, some of Aali in her youth...and a couple he recognized as her parents...then a few of her brothers and sisters...then...oh dear God...there were some of her with a handsome young Indian man. Others of her with a small child in her arms that resembled Aali so much it made his throat sting.
She was married The thought knocked the wind from his lungs and he leaned upon the wall for support. He had to leave, he had to stop making a fool of himself. He felt as if he were walking through water as he moved towards the outside door, and away from the only woman he couldn't live without...
"Felipe," she called as he reached the end of the hall still reeling from the blow. G-d he loved the way she said his name, her honeyed voice and the lilting English accent made his knees go weak. He had to leave to get out of here, she's MARRIED yet none of that mattered any longer, for her voice had transfixed him to this spot, he couldn't breathe let alone walk out the door, away from her...