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As today is Valentine's Day in my country, I'd like to offer these chapters to my husband, Doni! :-)For Doni
The Darcys' carriage quickly left the vicinity of Wellington Fields and approached more populated streets. The activity provided by the passers-by and street vendors was not enough to attract the attention of the coach occupants, though - Darcy and Elizabeth were still sorting out their feelings after the distressing but enlightening meeting with Miss Emily Hargraves, and Mrs. Gardiner was fighting the awkwardness of her current situation.
Mrs. Gardiner had accompanied her niece to Miss Hargraves' home so that she could help Elizabeth if necessity arose. However, her position now could not be more disadvantageous, since she was unwillingly preventing the couple from discussing the matter that was still afflicting them.
On the other hand, Mrs. Gardiner felt glad for the opportunity of observing her niece's husband and her conclusion about his disposition was more than satisfactory. Not only was she well impressed with Mr. Darcy's behaviour towards herself and the respectful and attentive manner in which he conducted the inquisition to Miss Hargraves, but also concerning his actions towards Lizzy. Despite a little resentment that the gentleman might still feel against his wife, very natural if the peculiarity of the couple's quarrel was taken into consideration, it was visible the strength and depth of his feelings and his dedication to Lizzy.
These were Mrs. Gardiner's thoughts when the carriage advanced towards Lepton Street. She immediately recognised the familiar rows of merchants' establishments that spread through three or four quarters, as Mr. Gardiner's own store was located on this street. Attempting to put an end to her strange predicament, she proposed to her niece,
"As you may have already noticed, we are next to Mr. Gardiner's establishment, Lizzy. I was wondering if you could ask your coachman to stop in the next quarter and I would come back home with your uncle."
Elizabeth looked through the window and was going to answer, but Darcy's voice prevented her from doing so, "And I was wondering if you could be so kind as to accompany us home, Mrs. Gardiner."
Mrs. Gardiner gazed at Elizabeth and then at her husband before replying, "Oh, I would not like to impose upon you further, sir."
"Not imposing at all, ma'am. It would be for us a pleasure if you could go with us." He smiled a little at Elizabeth's aunt. "I am afraid I am also being somewhat egotistic on behalf of my wife, as I believe that Elizabeth will be in need of your assistance. Oh, I know she will deny it, but as you must be aware, she did not feel well at Miss Hargraves' house." He then stared at his wife in a defiant manner.
"Really, Fitzwilliam! Much as I would love to have my aunt's company a little longer, I would not wish to detach her from her family more than the strictly necessary, which is exactly what I have just done this afternoon. I am perfectly well and there is no need to alarm my aunt or the rest of our household because of an ordinary feeling of fatigue " She returned the defiant look he had given her.
Darcy sustained Elizabeth's gaze and did not give in, "Given the circumstances, I would not consider it an 'ordinary dizziness', Elizabeth. You have been exposed to a great deal of tension of late, mostly the events we have just experienced this afternoon, and I am sure Mrs. Gardiner will agree with me about summoning a doctor as soon as we arrive home." He turned to the lady, silently asking for her help.
Feeling a little uncomfortable for being caught between the two armies, Mrs. Gardiner shifted her position on the seat. She was also amused by the couple's exchange - It is amazing how Mr. Darcy cares for Lizzy and she insists on denying it. Perchance she thinks he is patronising her, but he is not! He is worried about her health and, to tell the truth, so am I. I am sorry, Lizzy, but I am forced to support your husband's opinion. "Ah... I guess your husband is right, Lizzy. You look well, still one should be very careful in such a state, mainly because it is the first time. I am going with you and a doctor must be fetched, only if it is to confirm what you already know."
Elizabeth stared at her aunt, her eyes wide open displaying her dislike as well as her astonishment at her aunt's support to Darcy. Still, Mrs. Gardiner held to her conviction and sustained her position by looking steadily at her niece, as if saying 'You know you are wrong, Lizzy'. Elizabeth finally sighed, acknowledging her defeat. Then, shrugging discreetly, she admitted, "I can not fight the two of you. Yet you will see I am right!"
"This is my sole intention, Elizabeth - to prove that you are right and we have nothing to worry about." Darcy said staring at her, his eyes sparkling as fervently as before. All of his initial defiance had faded away, leaving place to pure concern and something else that made Elizabeth flush and turn her gaze to the pedestrians wandering outside. Darcy grabbed the opportunity to thank Mrs. Gardiner by slightly nodding his head.
Still keeping her eyes fixed at the movement on the street, Elizabeth stated, "I was thinking about our chance meeting at Miss Hargraves' house, sir."
"I would call it a 'providential meeting', Elizabeth - by different means we came to the truth together, therefore I am sure that there will be no reason for any doubts that could be aroused, had you heard about Miss Hargraves' story from me, rather than finding it by yourself." It was only because of this that Darcy was not angry at his wife's attempt to investigation.
Elizabeth gulped at how well Darcy had pictured her possible reaction to Miss Hargraves' story, had she not heard it from the lady herself. And what else did you expect he would think of you, Lizzy? You have believed Mr. Wickham instead of him twice, even if it was in an indirectly manner last time. Upon thinking of this, a question came to Elizabeth's mind and she immediately voiced it, turning to her husband, "Do you conceive who could possibly have written the missive, Fitzwilliam? Mr. Wickham himself, perhaps?"
"No, it was not Wickham. Do you remember Miss Hargraves talking about a certain Mrs. Younge, who used to be a companion to Lord Corbel's sister?"
"I do. The lady who paid her a visit last December, was she not?"
"Exactly. Had you ever heard her name before, Elizabeth?" Darcy inquired.
Elizabeth raised her eyebrows in wonder. "Mrs. Younge..." Finally, she made the connection in her mind, "Oh Lord! Was she the lady who used to be your sister's companion before the Ramsgate event last summer?"
"Your memory is amazing, ma'am." He mocked, but his face was serious.
"As far as I can remember, she helped Wickham then, did she not?" Elizabeth was half puzzled, half excited. Yet she turned to her aunt and briefly explained to her that Mr. Wickham had tried to take advantage of Darcy's sister last summer, without detailing how the scoundrel had almost achieved this.
"Not only at that time, but also a month ago." Darcy said enigmatically.
"Oh, She wrote the letter to help Mr. Wickham again! But why? I can not see how she would gain any benefit from doing so!"
"Actually, Wickham paid her to write the letter and send it to you, together with the false marriage license, if she did not hear from him until a week before Christmas." Darcy explained. "It would be - and it was - his last artifice against me. If he could not obtain from life what he wished, he did not wish me to be happy either."
"He thus used an event from the past to attempt to malign you in front of me and tarnish our marriage." Elizabeth admitted, her cheeks starting to burn upon recognising her blindness and precipitation in dealing with the matter.
"And he would have achieved it, had you behaved like most of ladies would in such a case." Darcy acknowledged. "Had you done so, you would never have confronted me about Miss Hargraves and the lies of that missive would slowly curdle our relationship forever." I only hope this has not occurred yet and we shall be able to re-start.
Darcy was talking seriously, but his tone had nothing of the resentment he felt and expressed on the first days after their quarrel. Elizabeth was painfully aware of this and that any other gentleman would be now pointing out her mistake, triumphing over her pretension of being witty. Still, he was so gentle as to omit her fault and praise her for having been so insolent as to defy him using false premises.
Elizabeth could not help but stare at her husband, her eyes and semblance making visible her turmoil. Darcy then knew it was too early to make amends, as she still needed some time to reach her own conclusions, to reconcile herself to his real character, leaving behind the precipitous (and faulty) ideas she had conceived about him. Much as he wished to go after her, he knew that she should take the first step to a possible reconciliation.
The couple's meditation was interrupted by Mrs. Gardiner, who asked, "I can not see why Mr. Wickham passed himself off as you, Mr. Darcy. Did he use this alias because it would be easier to pretend? As he had grown up at your estate, I believe that the possibility of being caught lying red-handed lying was very little."
Darcy became visibly abashed. He passed his right hand over his hair at least thrice before finally replying, "I wish it had only been for this, for his sole desire of enticing Miss Hargraves that he introduced himself as an estate owner in Leicestershire, but it was not."
Both ladies gasped, but only Elizabeth commented, "I did notice you were rather uncomfortable when Miss Hargraves inquired about this, Fitzwilliam. It seemed to me that you were strangely attempting to defend Mr. Wickham, by insisting on the idea that his passion had led him to that awful masquerade."
"I was not defending him, Elizabeth. I was endeavouring to protect Miss Hargraves instead - I did not wish her to know that she had only been part of a plan that had not worked out. I think that, for everything she suffered and she has faced since she let herself to be persuaded by Wickham, she deserved to fancy that the scoundrel cared for her at least a little."
Darcy closed his eyes for a moment and grabbed tight the leather seat of the coach. Then, fixing his gaze at nowhere outside the window, he proceeded, "You may be wondering how I know about this. Well, during the investigation in Leicestershire, I came to know that Mrs. Younge had been a companion to Lord Corbel's sister. Aware as I was that this 'lady' had already helped Wickham in the past, and since their acquaintance had likely started during Wickham's stay as his lordship's guest, I thought that perchance she could have some information."
"So I suppose you went to see her before paying a visit to Miss Hargraves." Elizabeth stated.
"Yes, as I was not sure whether Miss Hargraves would receive me. Mrs. Younge was not happy at seeing me and she refused to tell me anything in the beginning. However, since she is not in a comfortable position as to omit any information, she eventually came to her senses and talked about what Wickham had devised to do." Actually, Darcy had to threaten Mrs. Younge with deportation to the colonies before she acceded to his request - there was a list of possible things that she could be charged with, from theft to facilitating prostitution.
"Wickham had first approached her in London, during Lord Corbel's visit to his sister. Wickham had gone with his lordship to Town and immediately became interested in the young lady for obvious reasons - he was searching for a young heir. Knowing that the family was on the verge of bankruptcy, Mrs. Younge warned him and was rewarded with some money for her 'kind' advice. Money that had likely been given to him by my father."
"A year later, they met again at Willowside Manor. Wickham never told her why, but Mrs. Younge knew that he was blackmailing Lord Corbel, which is why his lordship agreed to present Wickham as Fitzwilliam Darcy. At that time, Wickham was not looking for an heir any longer. Instead, he needed a lady who would not be considered as of breeding and whose family was not wealthy. Mrs. Younge indicated some possible quarries, but Wickham preferred Miss Hargraves because her father was a clergyman."
Elizabeth exclaimed, "Lord! Everything was premeditated. But why?"
Darcy gulped and hesitated for a few seconds before elaborating, "It seems that, during a conversation with my father, Wickham had learnt his opinion about elopements and one marrying without the family's consent. My father was very strict about honour and one's duty to family and he told Wickham that, if I ever came to do such a thing and dishonoured the Darcys' name, he would not hesitate about disinheriting me."
"Mr. Wickham thus supposed that he would be bequeathed by your father's will if the late Mr. Darcy discovered about 'your wife and child'. It was preposterous from him!" Elizabeth was indignant.
"Not in his mind, Elizabeth. He knew my father was very fond of him and even if he did not inherit all my father's fortune, Wickham was almost sure that he would receive much more than as a mere godson." Darcy breathed hardly. "However, he did not expect that my father would fall ill and pass away in a question of weeks, undermining his plans."
The two ladies were rather sick at the cold manner in which Wickham had plotted against Darcy, and worse, involved innocent people in it. Overcoming her uneasiness, Elizabeth sympathetically looked at her husband and brought herself to say, "Now I can understand why you were trying to convince Miss Hargraves of that man's feelings for her - it was honourable from you to attempt to conceal all this perfidy from the lady after all she has endured."
Darcy grinned sadly, "There was no honour in my doing so, Elizabeth. I was also too ashamed to tell her that she had been for Wickham merely a means to injure me and reach my family's wealth."
Elizabeth realised the guilt in his words and attempted to be supportive, "It is not your fault, Fitzwilliam. You could have done nothing to prevent Mr. Wickham from harming her, or even yourself."
"I know it is not, at least not directly. Still, it shocks me to think about what might have succeeded to Miss Hargraves and her child, had Wickham's plan been achieved."
"You mean..." Elizabeth was unable to complete her sentence - to think that Wickham would have easily disposed of mother and child was even more repugnant than the whole scheme.
"Why not?" Darcy wondered. "After he had stooped so low, nothing would stop him. Miss Hargraves would be a serious hazard to his ambitions because, as far as I could gather from her character, she would not concur with his ambush and be silent about it. Besides, the child's resemblance to him would give his plan away in time."
He passed his hand over his hair anew and sighed sombrely. " And he used her again after five years in an attempt to hurt me. If he could not be in charge of the Darcys' assets, he wished at least to take from me something that is more precious than all my family's legacy." Having said so, Darcy fell in silence for the rest of the journey to the Town house. The discussion of this matter was closed momentarily. However, his meaning had not been lost, due to the fact that Mrs. Gardiner warmly smiled at him, in spite of the sorrow she was feeling for the sad story she had come to learn.
In her turn, Elizabeth felt her heart skip a beat. Could he have referred to her? Or was he thinking only of Georgiana? She sighed heavily. As the bad impression caused by her knowledge of Darcy's interference on Jane and Bingley's affair, his disrespect in what concerned her family and his "false marriage" was beginning to dissipate, Elizabeth was confused and ashamed. Had she acted more with her sense than with her emotion, perchance her marriage would not be in jeopardy now.
The carriage jolted a little, but Elizabeth did not notice it at all, concentrated as she was on observing her husband's face. Yet she was not looking at his handsome features, or at the dimple in his chin. Actually, she was wondering about how she had not seen his goodness before. Rather, how she had insisted on being blind all this time. She, who had always considered herself a good studious of character, had twice failed concerning his disposition.
Through the window, Elizabeth saw the already familiar forms of the trees of ________ Park and knew they were home. Soon, green leaves and colourful flowers would replace the white and somewhat tedious scenery of the park. Would she be capable of bringing back the colours to her marriage and establishing a new palette for their lives? She knew it only depended on her.
"But I feel perfectly well, Dr. Pollock." An annoyed Elizabeth exclaimed from under the covers. She had been confined to her bedchamber right after she entered home.
"And we wish you to remain so, which is why you should repose in your bed until tomorrow. I shall come to see you again tomorrow before luncheon and if your health does not alter, you will be allowed to do as you please, Mrs. Darcy." The doctor said in a light, still firm tone.
"Is this your final word, doctor?" Elizabeth insisted.
"No, ma'am. It is 'Congratulations'!" The doctor grinned. "I heard similar complaints about remaining in bed less than a couple of months ago. If you allow me the impertinence, your husband and you have much in common in which concerns obstinacy." Doctor and patient laughed at the comment.
At this moment, Jane came in looking very worried. After having made the necessary introductions, Elizabeth asked Jane to sit down next to her. "And Jane, smile a little, please. It is not serious at all. What will be of us if you become dispirited every time I am in bed because you will be an aunt?"
"Oh, you are always making fun of me!" Then the realisation of her sister's words hit Jane, "Me? An aunt? Oh Lizzy!" She jumped in her sister's bed and hugged her tight, absolutely oblivious to the doctor's presence. "What wonderful news! Congratulations!"
Elizabeth smiled and thanked her sister, who now had another reason to be radiant. This piece of news was the only thing Jane would know at the moment, for the reason that Elizabeth did not wish to spoil Jane's happiness by relating the last events. One day Elizabeth would tell her about everything, when all of this would not be more than recollections.
Although Elizabeth still had much to settle with Darcy, she was feeling somewhat confident as to at least talk about the child they were expecting. Moreover, there was no point in concealing her state any longer, or she would risk making her relatives become worried about her health unnecessarily.
The two sisters chatted amiably about the baby for few minutes, and then about the last preparation for the ball in Jane's honour while Dr. Pollock registered in a small notebook his impressions about Elizabeth's health. Aware that she had not asked yet about her other relatives, Elizabeth inquired, "Is Georgiana still ill?"
Jane took a seat again near the bed while answering, "I guess she is, Lizzy. Her maid has already informed us that she is not going to join us downstairs for dinner."
Elizabeth turned to the doctor, who was at the bottom of the bed, "Perhaps you should see Miss Darcy before you leave, Dr. Pollock."
Dr. Pollock, who was engrossed organising his things inside his valise, looked up from it and arranged his spectacles, "I shall, if the lady wishes to see me."
"Oh, she will." Elizabeth turned to Jane again, "How about Mary? It seemed she was not feeling well either at lunch time."
"No indeed. I heard her sneezing in the music room the half an hour she spent there after you left this afternoon. She must have been rather ill, because she did not play a single piece entirely." Jane stated, her concern for Mary visible in her face.
"I knew she would fall ill too. I advised her earlier this morning not to go and stroll in ____________ Park, but she insisted upon it. Really, Jane. Mary has acted so strangely of late." Elizabeth nodded her head in reproach.
Then, a loud thump was heard - Dr. Pollock had dropped his valises from the table where he had it resting. Jane noticed he had grown white and she quickly stood up and walked towards him. "Are you feeling unwell, doctor?" The question would sound comic, if the doctor did not look so afflicted.
"I ... I..." He did not complete his sentence though, and kneeled down to gather his instruments, which he quickly threw inside his valises. Afterwards he straightened up, nervously arranging his spectacles. Jane gazed at her sister, unsure of what to do.
Eventually, Elizabeth tentatively inquired, "Dr. Pollock?"
"I am... Ah, well." The doctor motioned to take his valises and excuse himself out of the bedchamber, still the question that was burning in his tongue would not leave him in peace if he did not inquire about it, "I believe I misunderstood you, Mrs. Darcy." His cheeks passed from white to bright red in a matter of seconds, "Did you say that your sister went to _____________ Park this morning?"
"Yes, she did. I believe Mary became ill due to this."
"Forgive me Mrs. Darcy, but are you sure it was this park just across from your house?" Dr. Pollock seemed very anxious.
"Yes, I am." Elizabeth was staring at him in amazement. She had always thought of the doctor as a well-balanced gentleman, if a little shy. He had been very kind and supportive during Darcy's illness and convalescence. However, he now looked somewhat deranged.
"Oh Lord! What a coincidence!" The doctor was very agitated.
"I beg your pardon?" Elizabeth and Jane inquired almost in unison.
"I had better go and see Miss Darcy. Have a good night, ladies." Dr. Pollock almost ran out of the chamber.
The sisters exchanged glances and did not know whether to laugh at the doctor's sudden clumsiness or worry about it.
As it was expected, Georgiana did not leave her bedchamber for dinner. Dr. Pollock had seen her and concluded that the sore throat and fever that had indisposed the lady had only started to improve, therefore she should remain in bed for a couple of days. Hence, Darcy was the only host available to entertain Mrs. Gardiner and his sisters-in-law, Jane and Mary Bennet.
Elizabeth's sisters still felt a little awkward at Darcy's presence and were a little startled by the gentleman's outspoken disposition tonight - he seemed delighted at exchanging memories of Lambton with Mrs. Gardiner. The lady had lived in this little town located next to Pemberley and to talk about it gave Mrs. Gardiner immeasurable pleasure.
However, only Mrs. Gardiner was aware of Darcy's problems. Behind his amiability, she knew he was still impressed by the unpleasant events of the afternoon and concerned about Elizabeth's state. Moreover, the uncertainty about where his marriage would head for could not be put easily aside. She thus felt a little sorry for him, and for Elizabeth too.
Hardly had the dinner ended and Mary excused herself to see Georgiana, as she wished to check her friend's health by herself. Besides, she was in need of someone to confide what had distressed her for most of the day. Georgiana welcomed her cheerfully and Mary informed her about the latest news - Elizabeth's pregnancy.
"A baby! Oh I am so happy! For Elizabeth, for Fitzwilliam, for you, for me!" Georgiana was jumping in her bed, her eyes burning in excitement, hiding for some moments the traces of the illness that had weakened her for the last week. She started to cough and Mary fetched her some water from the crystal decanter positioned in a table nearby. Georgiana wiped the corner of her lips before proceeding, "Have you talked to Elizabeth yet?"
"Not yet." Mary was grabbing the bedpost and she rested her forehead on it. " It was not possible, as she arrived late in the afternoon with your brother and my aunt Gardiner, and the doctor was summoned right after this. I believed she was a little unwell." Mary saw Georgiana's face become sombre and she quickly added, "Oh, nothing serious. Probably something related to her state."
As a matter of fact, Mary had avoided meeting both her sisters since her fiasco in _______ Park this morning. She was not feeling herself and she knew that at least Lizzy would realise that something was wrong. The notion that she had behaved stupidly did not leave her in peace and she was not willing to talk about the matter, at least not to her sisters, who would certainly reproach her for her mistake.
Georgiana saw that Mary was hiding something, so she pressured, "Are you not glad for becoming an aunt soon, Mary?"
"Oh I am very glad indeed." Mary drew a faint smile.
"But..." Georgiana insisted, leaning forward.
"But?" Mary raised her eyebrows. Could she trust the story of her foolishness to Georgiana? Well, she has been very supportive. Still, what would she think of me? Feeling unsure, Mary attempted to evade, "Ah, I am only a little distracted. I hope I shall not fall ill either."
Georgiana reposed in the soft pillows and studied her friend's face. "You do look distracted, but not because of illness, Mary."
Mary pressed her forehead against the bedpost anew. She was afraid of Georgiana's reaction, but she was so much in need of someone to talk to. Therefore, she finally decided to risk, "Do you remember that day at the bookstore?"
Georgiana frowned attempting to remember anything that could have annoyed her friend then. She found nothing. "I do, yet I do not recollect anything in special."
"I was talking to a gentleman when you called me to return to the seamstress'."
"A very tall, fair gentleman? I did not see his face, but I do remember you saying goodbye to him. Strange - his tall figure reminded me of someone I have already met."
"Indeed?" Mary stared at her.
"Yes, but I can not say whom exactly."
Mary wrinkled. "I... I met him again at the bookstore two days later." In a torrent of words, Mary related to Georgiana everything that had transpired between "Hector" and herself - their pleasant talks about everything (mainly about books and music), their going to a coffee shop, her nights awake thinking of him and the disastrous meeting in _______ Park.
It is needless to say that Georgiana was dumbfounded - not because Mary had found a beau, but for the immense transformation her friend had suffered in the last 3 weeks How nice was for Georgiana to be a witness of Mary's bloom. Nonetheless, the outcome of the last event was not good at all. "But why did you run away from him, Mary?"
"Can you not see, Georgie? I knew nothing of him - his name, his address, even what he makes for a living. Nor anyone knew that I was meeting him in the park."
"You had agreed to meet him under such circumstances. He knew nothing of you either." Georgiana argued.
"Oh it seemed so... I do not know - different, exciting. It did not look dangerous while we met in rather crowded places. But when I saw myself alone with him in a desert park, I realised how fool I had been - what would he think of a lady who agreed to meet him in such a place and without a chaperon? "
"Well, it was not a very proper situation indeed." Georgiana could not help stating the obvious.
"Besides, when I noticed his strange behaviour and that he was hiding something under his overcoat I panicked, Georgie. All the gothic stories I had read came to my mind and I ran away as fast as my wet petticoat allowed." Mary was staring at nothing, her mind's eyes filled with the images of the morning.
"Do you read gothic novels? I thought you only read the classics and serious books!" Georgiana exclaimed innocently.
Mary smiled sheepishly, "I do. Late at night, hidden in my chamber."
Georgiana laughed, "So do I. Fitzwilliam does not approve of such novels." Then, perceiving they had digressed from the main point, Georgiana stated, "And you are feeling stupid because you allowed such events to take place in your life as well as for having escaping from him, without the knowledge of his true intentions."
"Exactly. I know I should not have grown such a relationship, but I could not help myself." Mary sighed.
"Do you like him, Mary?"
"Will you believe me if I confirm it, even considering that we have not known each other for more than a week?"
"I shall." Georgiana was serious.
"I do." Mary lowered her head.
"Oh Lord."
"I know it seems absurd. How can one be in love with an almost stranger?" Mary wondered.
"It does not. Sometimes you think you have known a person for all your life and suddenly you end up noticing that you have not - this person reveals to be as trustful as a perfect stranger." It was Georgiana's turn to lower down her head, her eyes fixed in the fine embroidery of the linen. Eight months after been deceived by Wickham and she still felt a little dispirited, although she did not feel any longer that she alone was to blame for it.
Mary immediately saw Georgiana's reaction and exclaimed, "Please, forgive me Georgie. I did not wish you to be reminded of sad events. I mean, I did not know you had already been in love. You are so young."
"I am sixteen." Georgiana said proudly. Then, in a more meditative tone she stated, "But I was only fifteen then and I made an awful mistake. The gentleman was not reliable at all despite being an old acquaintance. Were it not for my brother, I would have been irretrievably compromised." Georgiana looked at Mary in order to see her friend's reaction, but nothing in Mary's face indicated that she reproached Georgiana for what have happened.
Georgiana continued, "It was a very trying experience, but I learnt a lesson from it." She was conscious that the worst part of this she had already overcome - thankfully, her fancy for Wickham had already faded away. Georgiana was not ready yet to love, still the bitterness and lack of hope that had dominated her in the first months were slowly giving place to a more sensible and balanced lady.
"As far as I can gather, you have nothing to be blamed for if the gentleman was a scoundrel. Besides, you were and still are very young." Who would think that Mary would stop moralising? Things have changed in her life indeed. "In my turn, I am nineteen, I had never been in love before and I have just made a fool of myself." Mary concluded.
"Oh no, Mary. There still may be hope for you and 'Hector'." Georgiana wished to stand up and embrace her friend, but she had another coughing fit that prevented from doing so.
"I do not believe so." Mary said in dismal as she offered more water to Georgiana.
"Thank you." While drinking from the goblet, Georgiana had an idea, "Perhaps we could stroll together in the park. Or we could go to the bookstore before coming back to Hertfordshire."
"The doctor said you should stay in bed for another couple of days, and we shall be heading home in three days!" Mary pointed out to her friend.
"Oh Dr. Pollock does not need to know..."
"Georgie! I would not allow you to do such a thing. Besides, I do not even know if I want to meet him again." Mary reasoned.
"And would you rather wonder for the rest of your life about what could it have been, Mary? I would not!" Georgiana argued. She would not allow Mary to give up so easily.
Georgiana's determination persuaded Mary to at least consider the matter, "I promise I shall think about it, Georgie. At least I am feeling better for having told you my secret."
"And I am glad you have chosen me for doing so. Moreover, you heard my secret too, so I guess we are even now, Miss Mary Bennet." Georgiana twinkled. She was relieved for having confided her secret to her now best friend. "But you should make haste, dear. Remember, we shall be here only for more three days." Georgiana smiled.
"I am sure it will not take so long." Mary answered and took her adieu, leaving Georgiana to deal with her own ghosts.
A couple of hours later
Mrs. Gardiner stirred in her seat. The armchair was very comfortable, but not enough to prevent her from feeling an awful pain in the nape of the neck after having taken a short nap. Upon opening up her eyes, she became startled - she was not alone with Elizabeth in her niece's bedchamber, as she had initially presumed. There, at the bottom of Elizabeth's canopy was the very figure of Mr. Darcy. The lady hastily recomposed herself and stood up, drawing the gentleman's attention.
"I beg your pardon, Mrs. Gardiner. I did not mean to wake you." Darcy apologised.
"Not at all, Mr. Darcy. I have got to retire myself."
"Are you not staying with Elizabeth for the night?" Darcy was a little surprised.
"No, sir. She did not allow me to." Mrs. Gardiner grinned. "It was hard to stay here and see Elizabeth fall asleep, as she insisted upon talking. I think this is the reason I slept for a little while myself."
"She does not wish to stay in bed, does she?" Darcy already knew the answer. He turned her eyes to his wife anew, her dark locks covering the white linen of the pillow., and he silently sighed.
"No indeed." She also looked at Elizabeth. "Actually, she is very well. Her dizziness earlier was only a result of the circumstances of the afternoon."
"Yes, I know she is strong. Still I had to come and check by myself." Darcy smiled slightly embarrassed.
"One would not expect less from you, sir." Mrs. Gardiner said in support. How well impressed she was with Mr. Darcy. She could not understand why Lizzy could have had doubts about his character, about his true feelings regarding her. And he looked so vulnerable here, observing his wife in pure concern for her well-being, but also in deep veneration. "Well, I guess it is too late. I had better leave for my chamber."
"Just a minute Mrs. Gardiner, please." Darcy moved towards her and stared at her in earnest. "Do you believe that everything is well with her? I mean, some ladies in such a state look healthy in a day, yet they can suffer something in the following day and... And even..."
"As far as we can see, she is remarkably well, sir." His interest reminded her of her own husband - dear Edward! He had also grown so worried during her first pregnancy. Few gentleman were capable of feeling in such a way, let alone displaying it so openly. Lizzy should know about this. "Do not distress yourself, Mr. Darcy. You have even stated yourself that your wife is a strong lady."
"Forgive me for disturbing you with such silly ideas, Mrs. Gardiner. It is that my own mother..." He passed his hand over his hair, visibly touched by the memories of the late Lady Anne. "She had serious problems after Georgiana was born, and even later, in subsequent unsuccessful attempts, and this ruined her health. I could not stand if the same happened again."
"It will not, sir." He had irrevocably won her favourable opinion. "Lizzy only needs to rest and the support of a person who cares for her." She smiled openly at him. "Good night, sir."
"Thank you for your attention, Mrs. Gardiner. Good night." He bowed to her.
After Mrs. Gardiner had left the chamber, Darcy walked to the canopy and stopped next to the bedside. He remained there for a while, gazing at her dear features, at her fine dark eyelashes that insisted on concealing the vivacity of her eyes. Slowly, he lowered his head and lightly kissed her forehead. Elizabeth murmured something in her slumber and he moved backwards.
Finally, he spoke, "As you see, my resentment has already vanished, ma'am. I wish you could feel in the same way. Can I still have hope, Liz?" Darcy then caressed her soft hair and led to his own chamber.
London, 11th of February, 1812
It was after nine when Mrs. Gardiner went to see Elizabeth in her chamber. Her niece was still in her bed, following the doctor's recommendations, but the room exhaled vivacity due to the faint sunlight coming through the window - as soon as she was awake, Elizabeth had ordered the chambermaid to draw the curtains. Besides, the own lady's feelings seemed to influence the atmosphere of the room.
Mrs. Gardiner walked towards the canopy and commented, after having seen her niece's good disposition, "I see you look extremely well." Elizabeth's cheeks were slightly red and her demeanour showed such a calmness that Mrs. Gardiner had not seen for a long time.
"I do. I have told everyone that I did not need to be in bed, but the doctor insisted I should rest a little." Elizabeth complained for the tenth time.
Mrs. Gardiner grinned. "It will not take so long, Lizzy."
"No, the doctor will be here in a quarter of hour or less and I shall be 'released'. " Elizabeth sighed .
"Splendid. I am afraid I shall not wait for the doctor, though - I have come just to say goodbye. I have been out of home for too long, the children must be restless." Mrs. Gardiner explained. There were no lengths to which her aunt would go to help and support her, yet the lady was aware this was the time to "retreat" and allow Elizabeth time to take her own conclusions.
"Oh! I was planning to talk to you about ... You know, about everything, but I think I should not be so egotistic as to steal you from your family, Auntie." Elizabeth knew her aunt had already done much for her - were not for the lady, she would not have found the whereabouts of Miss Hargraves, for example.
"You are not egotistic, Lizzy. I understand you have been through trying times and you can not count on Jane to support you now."
"No indeed. I do not wish her happiness to be spoiled by anything. She is the kindest person I have ever met and does deserve to be absolutely happy." Elizabeth's face lightened a little upon talking about her favourite sister.
"And you, my dear? Do you not deserve to be happy too?" Mrs. Gardiner mocked Elizabeth's serious tone.
"It is not a matter of being worthy of happiness or not, Auntie. Unfortunately, it is not so simple. Perchance it is related to one's ability to forgive, to accept and learn how to deal with the flaws and faults of the others, characteristics that Jane possesses in excess, but I do not." Elizabeth reasoned.
"Do not be so harsh on yourself, Lizzy."
"I am not being harsh, Auntie. Had I been in love with Mr. Wickham, I would not be so blind as to believe in his stories ( I had just met him!), to allow him to talk so openly about a person whom I barely knew myself . But my prejudices against Darcy led me then." Elizabeth remembered.
"But I guess you had already considered this over after your marriage last December, Lizzy." Mrs. Gardiner could not understand why her niece was still regretful about things that had happened some months ago. Elizabeth had always attempted to think about the pleasant things of the past, leaving the upsetting ones behind.
"I did, but I committed the same mistake again - I allowed myself to be guided by a false story. I preferred listening to a stranger to listening to my own husband." Elizabeth nodded her head.
"Because you heard your husband's comments about your family, his influence on Jane's affair..." Mrs. Gardiner approached Elizabeth's bed and took her hands between hers. "Listen, my dear. Jane is to be married to the man she loves; you are aware that our family is not exactly a paragon of manners, thus your husband's criticism unfortunately is not erroneous." Mrs. Gardiner paused to breathe.
"Certainly his haughty ideas are to be reproached, but he conquered this and married you - oh, and do not tell me that he did so because of the duel and his need of an heir. I could not help but noticing his regard for you and I assure you, it is not a product of a couple of days spent by your side, but something very deep. You should make an effort to see his essence, his good side, Lizzy. I have not known him for more than a day, still what I have learnt about him so far makes me happy that you are married to him."
"I am aware of all of this, Aunt Gardiner. Still it is not easy to know what to do. He may behave gentlemanly towards me now, perchance all his resentment towards my unfair accusations is over. However, something he said once at Netherfield has worried me the most since I perceived my foolishness. My good opinion once lost, is lost for ever - those were his words. I am afraid I shall not obtain his forgiveness." Elizabeth gazed at her aunt. Uneasiness, crystal clear in her eyes, had replaced the calmness she had experienced earlier this morning.
"I see. Yet I guess he must be afraid of ever be forgiven too." Mrs. Gardiner finally released her niece's hands. "The important thing is: both of you need to talk. I mean, not today, perhaps only after the ball. Yet you can not continue without coming to terms. You should not be afraid of telling him your fears, Lizzy. And be open to listen to his. This is the only possible thing I can advise you to do."
"Thank you, Auntie. I still have much to ponder and I do not feel at ease to pursue the matter with him today. Still I know that it is unavoidable, even if it is to listen to his reproach of me." Elizabeth caressed the covers.
Mrs. Gardiner approached her anew and kissed her forehead. "Have a good day, my dear. I shall be waiting for a note from you confirming your good health." She then crossed the room towards the door, but stopped halfway. "Oh, I have completely forgotten this. Mr. Darcy came to see you last night, after you had fallen asleep, Lizzy."
"Did he?" Elizabeth raised her eyebrows.
"Yes. He wanted to be sure of your welfare." Elizabeth pulled a face but said nothing. She was likely divided between the pleasure of his coming and the idea of his visit as mere duty. "Could I suggest you another thing, Lizzy?"
"Of course, Auntie." Elizabeth's eyes sparkled in curiosity.
Mrs. Gardiner smiled, but continued in a serious tone, "Mr. Darcy is very worried about your state. Do not mock him or attempt to make little of his fears. He confessed to me that his mother had serious problems during a pregnancy, and it was not only once, which damaged her health for ever."
"I see your point, Auntie. I shall behave myself." Elizabeth said, a little touched by the information.
"I know you will. Goodbye, dear."
Hardly had Mrs. Gardiner left Elizabeth's bedchamber and Mrs. Hart came in to announce Dr. Pollock's arrival. The doctor seemed a little absentminded, but performed the necessary examination with attention. He finally concluded, grinning, "You are free for now, Mrs. Darcy. If you behave yourself and do nothing that may damage your health, you will only need to be confined anew in seven months."
"Thank you, doctor." Elizabeth immediately rang the bell for Helen, her maid, so that she could dress and go downstairs quickly - there must be so much to be done. Jane arrived soon after and smiled at noticing her sister's excitement.
"I guess you will join us for luncheon, Lizzy." Jane said cheerfully.
"Yes, I could not stand be still here for another hour." Elizabeth laughed.
"I beg your pardon, Mrs. Darcy." Dr. Pollock drew Elizabeth's attention. He was still unsure of what he was going to do, but he had to do something - that question could not remain unanswered. "But I remember you talking about another sister of yours who might be ill..."
"Oh, of course! Miss Mary Bennet." Elizabeth turned to Jane. "Is she better, Jane? She has not come to visit me yet and I am starting to become somewhat worried about her."
"I can not state for sure, Lizzy. She had breakfast with us earlier, but she was still complaining about a headache and an even possible sore throat." Jane dutifully reported.
Dr. Pollock cleared his throat and suggested, "Perhaps she is suffering from Miss Darcy's illness too."
"Very likely, since the symptoms are similar." Elizabeth replied. "Would you see my sister too, doctor?"
It was exactly what he had planned. "If she wishes to see me." This was one of the doctor's motto, as he did not like to impose upon any patient.
"She will." And as Helen had just come in, she said, "I shall send Helen first to tell Mary that you will be with her in five minutes. Jane will accompany the examination in our sister's chamber, doctor."
So was it done. However, instead of waiting for the doctor's visit Mary, who had always been afraid of apothecaries, directed herself towards her sister's bedchamber. She was going to show to Elizabeth (and probably Jane) that she was not in need of a doctor.
Mary entered her sister's room and, purposely not looking at a tall figure she judged to be the doctor, walked to Elizabeth's canopy. "I hope you are in good health, Lizzy. As you can see, I am very well myself."
Elizabeth grinned at Jane and both of them remembered of Mary's fear. They exchanged glances, a sign that Mary's fear should be forgotten for her own sake. Then, turning to Mary, Elizabeth said, "Jane has told me you have been not yourself lately, Mary. As Dr. Pollock has come to see me, you could be examined too."
"I...." Mary was prevented from finishing her sentence because Elizabeth was already making the introductions.
"Dr. Pollock, this is my sister Mary Bennet." Elizabeth looked at the doctor and realised that he was pale, tightly gripping his valise. Nevertheless, it was Mary's reaction to the introduction who startled her - Mary became absolutely red and seemed on the verge of fainting. Jane approached Mary, but she refused her help. Elizabeth finally inquired, "Mary? What is the matter with you?"
Mary gazed at her sisters without comprehending what they were saying. She could only think of the gentleman standing in the other side of the canopy, wearing a blue attire. A fair gentleman. A green-eyed gentleman, wearing a pair of spectacles that was never still, slipping over his nose. He was also staring at her, cold sweat drops in his forehead. His hands were cold too, squeezing the leather straps of his valise. He made an effort to say something, to at least bow to her and show his respect, but he was immobile looking at her dark eyes, happy for having met her again.
Suddenly, the spell was broken by Mary's cry, "Hector!" She then ran out of the room, leaving her sisters dumbfounded.
"I shall go after her, Lizzy!" Jane exclaimed, but the doctor prevented her from doing so by saying,
"Do not worry, ladies. I shall find Miss Mary and talk to her. Some patients are not so willing to be healed as others." And Dr. Pollock hurried out of the room before Elizabeth or Jane had time to think.
"I did not conceive that Mary's fear of doctors was actually a phobia." Elizabeth said in half amusement.
"Neither did I. Although I knew that the poor apothecary was bitten once while attempting to examine her throat." Jane informed her sister.
"Poor Dr. Pollock. He will have a hard time with Mary." Elizabeth giggled.
"Indeed!" Jane joined her sister, but stopped all of a sudden. "Hmm, Lizzy. Actually the doctor also seemed unwell, like he was yesterday."
"Yes, I noticed he paled when he saw her. Why, he may have realised he would have a difficult patient to treat, only this." The two sisters laughed anew.
Dr. Pollock had a hard time indeed, chasing Mary down the staircase first, then around the huge Darcy's house in vain calling out her "nickname", Penelope. Fortunately, the lady seemed not to know the house very well and she stopped in front of the door of the morning room, dutifully opened by a footman.
The doctor arrived there just some seconds later. Robert, the footman, hesitated to open the door and let in the gentleman, as the lady inside was alone. However, the gentleman in question was a doctor and perhaps Mrs. Darcy's sister was not well. Therefore, Robert opened the door anew and announced him, "Dr. Pollock, miss."
As soon as the door was closed behind his back, Dr. Pollock saw Mary standing behind a large armchair near the fireplace. He started to go to her, but she grabbed the statue of a horse from the mantelpiece and exclaimed, "Stay where you are! Better, turn around and leave me alone. If you come a step further, I shall not hesitate and hit your head with this."
The doctor opened his arms, "I can not understand, Penelope..."
"I am not Penelope. My name is Mary Louise Bennet." She was infuriated, the statue a threatening weapon in her hands.
"I can not understand why you escaped from me yesterday and you are attempting to do it now, Miss Mary Louise Bennet." He said more seriously.
"Can you not? I was right when I ran out from the park yesterday. You were playing with me, sir. All the time you knew I was Elizabeth Darcy's sister. How you must have laughed at me. But the joke is over now, sir." Mary raised her chin, trying to hide the pain she was feeling.
"I did not!" Mary looked at him in disbelief. He insisted. "Do you think that if I had known you lived here, I would not have come to look for you, Miss Bennet?" Mary stared at him. He grabbed the opportunity to step forward. "I became absolutely desperate when you left me yesterday without a single word of explanation. I spent the rest of the day reviewing my own behaviour looking for something I could have done to upset you."
"I..." Mary reposed the statue in the mantelpiece. How could she explain that she had been afraid of him, that she had thought him a maniac? Ah, how she now blamed those gothic novels that she read and had negatively influenced her imagination. She finally gathered herself to give a reason, even if a feeble one. "I noticed how improper was to continue meeting a person without even knowing his name."
"You agreed to it." He arranged his spectacles. "But I would have told you anything you wished to know - you only needed to ask. I thought you had pleasure in playing with Homer's characters. Besides, we were getting along so well without the use of our titles, last names, Christian names that I believed we did not need them to understand each other."
Mary hesitated. He had explained her thoughts exactly. Why should she blame him for something she had thought and done as well? She had stopped moralizing aloud, yet in her heart she still continued using other people's sentences to talk about things she had little knowledge of. However, she did not wish to hide herself behind some borrowed ideas any longer. She finally heard herself inquiring sheepishly, "What is your full name, sir?"
"Christopher Colin Pollock, ma'am." He bowed to her. Then, he took a package out of his valise, approached the armchair and offered the parcel to her. "I meant to give you this yesterday. I confess I plotted to see you today after I had heard from Mrs. Darcy that her younger sister had taken a stroll at __________ Park yesterday. Until then, I had never had the faintest idea who my dearest Penelope could be." He said affectionately, but stepped backwards as soon as Mary grabbed the package.
Mary felt her heart soften with every word he said, yet she did not know how to react. She opened the package and saw two books - The Iliad and The Odyssey, the two luxury editions that had brought the two together for the first time. "I can not accept them, doctor."
"Please, you should. It was meant to be a manner of introducing what I had planned to propose." Dr. Pollock stopped and took off his spectacles, the sadness he was feeling was plain in his small eyes. "Now I saw I was mistaken and that there was no motive for a proposal, at least not from you. Perchance this is the reason why you escaped from me yesterday - you divined my intentions and attempted to prevent me from making a fool of myself." He replaced his spectacles over his nose.
The realisation of his words stroke Mary - Proposal? Oh Lord! Did he mean he would propose marriage to me? But he did not even know my name! Nor did I know his, yet this did not stop me from falling in love with him! In love... It seems such a strange expression. "Dr. Pollock, I..."
"I do understand, Miss Bennet. What could one expect from a one-week-relationship? But, please, keep the books with you as a memento of the good hours we spent together. Have a good day." He turned around on his heels and moved to the door.
Mary grew appalled. She rested the books in the mantelpiece and looked at the doctor's back. They had misunderstood each other and if she did not stop him now, there would be no other chance in the future. "Doctor!" He did not turn around. She insisted, "Hector, please!" He halted. She quickly left her defensive position behind the armchair and ran to him. "Actually, there was a misunderstanding."
"Yes, there was." He said gravely and twisted around to meet her inquisitive and anxious eyes.
"Penelope and Hector never met each other. You know, they are in different books." Mary said pensively. Ugh, I should have thought of something less stupid to say, but it was the only thing that came to mind.
"I do know." Dr. Pollock held his breath, unsure of what was to come.
"Do you like Odysseus too?" Mary could not believe in what she was doing, still she was disposed to take a risk.
"I do." He was cautiously studying her.
"Penelope waited for Odysseus for years." Mary gulped. She closed her eyes and held her breath before continuing, "Shall I have to wait for you for so long too, Christopher?" Her last sentence was a mellifluous murmur, still aloud enough to be understood by her interlocutor.
And Dr. Pollock had understood her - he had firstly thought he was dreaming, but when the realisation of her words stroke him, he could not help choking. Mary was gazing at him, anxiously waiting for his reply. She had said his Christian name in such a sweet tone, he could not be wrong - she loved him too. He did not answer at all, he only embraced her as tight as he could and kissed her lips tenderly.
Mary did not have time to savour her first kiss though, as the door of the morning room was open and the footman announced the entrance of Lady Catherine de Bourgh, who upon noticing the scene in front of her, screamed, "What is happening here? What is this? Where is my nephew? I demand to see him immediately!"