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Chapter Thirteen

The rest of the week was a nightmare for Elisabeth. It wasn't just her work schedule, which was even more hectic because of Sean's forced absence from the store except on weekends, but the fact that the morning after she went bowling her nausea returned in full force. Every morning around nine, she was in the bathroom kneeling in front of her toilet. She'd taken to bringing a radio into the bathroom and turning the shower on full blast to muffle the sounds so Charlie wouldn't worry.

If Charlie suspected anything, she didn't say, but whenever Elisabeth looked in the mirror she knew the reflection showed her the truth. She looked terrible. Her face had no color in it except for the dark circles under her eyes which seemed to be a permanent fixture. She had almost no energy for anything and wanted to do nothing more than sleep the moment she got home. She certainly had no energy to be as witchy as she'd been the past several weeks. Instead, she meekly went along with just about everything people suggested as she was just too tired to argue.

She'd been so tired she hadn't even been able to stay up for Charlie's next date with Darcy. Elisabeth had been hoping she'd at least be able to do that, since it did her cynical heart good to see an old-fashioned romance blossoming right in her own apartment complex. After the third date, Charlie and Darcy had only shared a couple of kisses. Elisabeth was impressed and amazed. After most of her third dates, the guy she was with was usually asking if she'd like to go to his place for a night in.

Maybe that does make me a bit jealous of Charlie after all, she though wryly. There's never been a guy in my life who's ever treated me with respect.

Saturday afternoon was when the nausea and exhaustion caught up to her. She hadn't been eating properly-mostly crackers and soup when she could keep them down. Elisabeth figured it was that combination which caused her to faint again. She couldn't blame it on a cigarette, since she'd stopped smoking when even the smell and flavor of those made her feel sick.

It was in the middle of an early rush. One minute, she was tossing cheese onto a large pizza when the world suddenly tilted. She felt herself careening into something before she felt nothing at all. When she awoke, she was once again lying on the ground. Her work shirt had been freed from her pants, the top button of those undone as well. Someone held a cool cloth to her forehead. Something had been put underneath her head.

"Are you going to call the ambulance or am I going to have to do it?" she heard Kit ask as she opened her eyes slowly. The cool cloth was removed from her head.

"We're less than six blocks away from the damn place. Let's just take her in," Sean replied. "I think she's coming around. Elisabeth?"

Elisabeth groaned and looked up to see Darcy taking the cloth out of the ice water, wringing it out, and placing it back on her forehead.

"Thank God she's awake," Kit said tremulously. She sounded...nervous. Elisabeth wondered why before remembering how her mother had died last Christmas.

Poor Kit. This has to be painful for her.

"Okay, what do they say to do for someone in this situation? Uh...what's your full name?" Sean asked.

"Elisabeth Cathleen Bennet," she murmured.

"How old are you?"

"Twenty-six."

"Where do you live?"

"Look it up in my file."

The people who had gathered close to her chuckled. "I think she's going to be okay," she heard J.P. say.

Elisabeth started to get up but was swiftly pushed back down by Kit. "Forget it, babe. You're not going anywhere. You're going to lie back until I call an ambulance and then you're going to the hospital."

"No, I'm not," she protested weakly.

"Yes, you are. This is the second time you've fainted in as many weeks."

"But-"

"Don't make me call Charlie, because I will. She'll have you in an emergency room so fast you'll pass out again and it'll all be over before you wake up."

"I've got an appointment to see Dr. Hewitt," Elisabeth muttered. "And I'm feeling better now. All I need is rest."

"Sure you do."

"It's true." Well, it would be as soon as she could schedule an appointment. "I'm sure that she'll tell me I'm either suffering from heat exhaustion or mono or something. I'll rest up and be good as new in no time. So could I get a head start on the resting part and see you all tomorrow?"

"Absolutely not!" Kit snapped. "You need to see a doctor. This isn't something minor that you can brush off. People don't just faint for no reason. We know you hate doctors, El, but this is important. This could save your life."

"And Dr. Hewitt will no doubt save my life when I go to see her. On Monday. Now, I need to get up and go home."

"I'll take you home," Darcy volunteered. "Kit, if you wouldn't mind watching my tables?"

Kit was clearly disgruntled that no one was taking her suggestion seriously. "I'd rather you take her to the ER," she muttered.

"You've made that clear. Unfortunately, even if I were to take Elisabeth to the hospital, she would still have the right to refuse treatment and from the looks of things, that's exactly what she intends to do. The next best thing for her would be to go home and rest. You might want to reconsider coming in tomorrow, however."

"We'll see how I feel tomorrow," she replied.

"You'll only work from eleven to three if you decide to come in," Sean declared. "If the reason you're doing so poorly is overwork, then I'm telling Thomas Palmer to find someone else to take over Centralia until their new manager is fully trained."

"Do it anyway. We need you here," Kit told him.

"She'll need someone to drive her car home," Darcy said.

"Can I drive it?" J.P. asked.

"God no!" Elisabeth cried out. "You're not coming within a yard of my car with the keys."

"He's the only one I can spare. Louisa's busy with all the work you're going to miss and Kit's going to be covering Darcy until he gets back from taking you home."

Elisabeth whimpered. Her car, while not the gorgeous black convertible Darcy drove, was still her pride and joy because it was hers, completely and totally hers. The last person whose hands she wanted her baby in was J.P. Thorpe, who considered the streets of Effingham his own personal Daytona 500 race track.

"The keys are in my purse," she mumbled. "Now let me up so I can go home."

The next morning, Elisabeth woke up feeling refreshed. Her stomach was still a bit wobbly, but overall she was feeling much better than she had the day before. She called the store to let Sean know she would be in at eleven. Sean told her she would only stay until three and not even that long unless it got busy.

Elisabeth got into the shower, telling herself that illness was all in the mind. If she thought of herself as sick, she would be sick. If she thought of herself as healthy, she would be just fine.

Maybe I'll have a party tonight! she thought as she was rinsing conditioner out of her hair.

The second she thought of it, she felt a new wave of energy wash over her. Why hadn't it occurred to her before? She hadn't had a party since she returned to Effingham.

I used to have a party here at least once a week. I've been so bad to everyone that this'll put me back on good terms with them. I'll invite everyone at the store and offer drinks.

She frowned and turned off the water. She drew the shower curtain open and thought of how much it would cost to provide drinks for everyone she worked with. Bubba, for example, could drink an entire case of beer in one gulp. Chazz was known to get crazy when free drinks were involved. If the Gossip Sisters showed up after they got off work, they'd go through quite a bit.

Okay. No drinks, except soda. She could afford soda. Come to think of it, soda was all she should drink, which was a perfectly good excuse for why she wouldn't buy drinks for the rest of them. If they wanted something alcoholic, they could buy their own.

She toweled off and went to her room, still thinking of the party as she got dressed.

Food? Maybe food. Yes, definitely food. She'd buy chips and dip and cake. Elisabeth wished she could have this party at Sean's, so they could have grilled hot dogs and burgers. But she hadn't thought of the idea fast enough. Well, she'd call Jenna and ask her to make her famous beef stew and biscuits. She'd brought that to a staff party once and everyone had gone crazy over it. And she could always call Kit and ask her to bring banana breads, if she was willing to come. She'd have to beg for walnuts in the bread, though. Kit never put any in hers.

Elisabeth hoped no one would be angry with her for planning an impromptu party the day after passing out, but figured no one would mind as long as they had a party to go to.

After she finished getting dressed, she walked into the kitchen to see what she had before making a list of what she needed to buy. The first thing she saw was a note stuck to the door with a pair of magnets.

Elisabeth took it off the refrigerator, crumpled it up, and threw it away. She opened the door and saw the usual barren wasteland that was their refrigerator.

Neither of them cooked, Charlie because she had never learned and Elisabeth because she didn't like cooking for one. While their refrigerator wasn't littered with take-out containers, there wasn't much of a selection. Bologna and cheese, Charlie's favorite meal. A half-empty gallon of milk. A full container of orange juice. Two unopened bottles of Mountain Dew. Butter. Bread-why on earth was that in the fridge? And was that-

"Jell-O?" Elisabeth murmured. It looked good. Charlie must've made it a couple of days ago.

There were unidentifiable vegetables in the crisper, which were better left undisturbed, and in the door sat the bottles of alcohol. A neglected bottle of rum, Charlie's old favorite. A bottle of amaretto, Charlie's new favorite. A bottle of sweet-and-sour mix. A bottle of Strawberry Hill. Three bottles of Bud Light. A bottle of tequila rose.

"I'll have to hide that before the Gossip Sisters get here," she said to herself, shutting the door and opening the freezer door. Here was the mother lode, with plenty of TV dinners, ice cream, chicken patties, corn dogs, and two frozen pizzas.

From the freezer she went to the cabinets, finding the remnants of a bag of Cheetos and an unopened bag of tortilla chips. She added salsa to the list she had in her head.

Elisabeth was just shutting the last cabinet door when she realized something. If she had this party tonight, Charlie wouldn't be able to come, at least not until after eleven when she got off of work.

Well, she had an easy way to solve that problem. She looked at the refrigerator door again, where a list of phone numbers sat for emergencies. She dialed the one she hoped was correct and waited for Charlie to answer.

"Crisis, Charlotte speaking."

"Charlie? It's Elisabeth."

"What are you doing out of bed? You should be resting."

"Nah, forget that. I feel great and I'm going to work for a few hours. And tonight, I'm having a party."

"What?" Charlie hissed. "No way. You're not doing that."

"I am, and I want you to be here. Call in sick for the rest of the afternoon."

"I'm not calling in just to go to a party."

"No one you work with lives within two miles of here, and you don't have to peek your head outside our front door. I'll do the shopping and we'll rendezvous here around six or seven."

"El, I can't do that."

"Why? Got a crisis client?"

"No, but that's beside the point. I'm not sick."

"Get a migraine or something. C'mon, live a little. This is the first party I've even thought about having since I came back to the store. It'll be fun. Please? Pretty please? You need a party, Charlie. And what better way to show up the Gossip Sisters than to cuddle with Darcy in their presence for four or five hours?"

"I doubt I'd be cuddling with Darcy, but I see your point. All right, I'll see what I can do, but I doubt I have fun for feeling guilty about leaving work."

Elisabeth snorted. "You'll have the time of your life and you know it. My parties are always memorable."

"Oh, yeah. That's just the word I would've used about the time Chazz got so drunk he was hitting on you."

"If you hadn't ruined the joke when you did, we could've convinced him he was hitting on Bubba."

"Puh-lease. There was no way he'd ever be drunk enough to hit on Bubba."

"So when are you gonna be home?"

"When---yeah, Mom, I know. I've got to go."

"Someone standing in your doorway?"

"That's right."

"They didn't hear anything we were talking of before, did they?"

"I sure hope not. Talk to you later, Mom." Click.

Elisabeth grinned. Charlie claimed she would feel guilty, but she wouldn't. Elisabeth knew how sick Charlie was of working sixteen hours a day Saturday and Sunday because it gave her no time to spend with her friends. A party was just what Charlie needed.

A party was just what everyone---herself included---needed. Why hadn't she thought of it before?

"You must be joking," Sean muttered as he rang out a customer who'd called for a carryout right at eleven. The man had been parked in front of the store at ten-thirty, thinking he could get it sooner if he peeked in the windows and glared at anyone who happened to pass by. "A party?"

"Why not?"

"For one thing, you nearly went to the hospital yesterday. Now you want to get drunk and have this bunch of hoodlums at your place?"

"First of all, I'm not getting drunk. I'm going to have nothing but soda all night long. Second, I wish I'd thought of this two weeks ago when I first started feeling sick, because I haven't felt this good for quite a while. It's the positive vibes I'm getting from planning this thing that are making me feel good. I'd swear to it."

"Charlie is gonna kill you when she gets home and finds a party at her apartment," Jack said.

"No, she's not. She's coming home to join us."

"Doesn't she have to work today?" Sean asked.

Elisabeth shrugged. "She traded with someone else," she lied. "So, are you gonna be there?"

"Of course we'll be there. Have we ever not shown up to one of your parties, Elisabeth?"

"Good. I figure we'll start around seven." Elisabeth rushed to the back to put up the note she'd written inviting the rest of the staff over to her apartment if they could make it, but reminding them that they'd have to bring their own drinks. She'd already called Kit and Jenna, both of whom were agreeing to bring things to eat, which other than asking Jack to bring his excellent CD collection and begging Bubba not to bring his, was all that needed to be done until she got off work.

She smiled to herself as she pinned the note on the bulletin board next to the schedule.

"Excuse me...um, Elisabeth?"

Elisabeth turned to see Darcy frowning at the note. "Hi, Darcy. How are you?" she asked cheerfully. He seemed taken aback by her friendly manner, although the two of them seemed to get along better than they had the first week.

"I'm tired, actually, which is what I wanted to talk to you about. I know it's asking a bit much, but would it be possible to try and keep the party quiet?"

"You're not planning on being there?" Elisabeth was disappointed for Charlie's sake. Given how quickly the Gossip Sisters' minds worked, they'd probably think he'd fought with Charlie or something.

"I'm sorry, but I'm just so tired that I don't know if I'll make it through the day," he said wearily.

Elisabeth nodded. "I know the feeling. Well, I can't make any promises, Darcy, but I'll do my best to keep it down. And if you change your mind, we'll all be there so feel free to join us."

"I do thank you for the invitation, but I'm just not up to it."

Elisabeth felt a twinge of sympathy for Darcy. He was obviously not cut out for this place, although it did seem as though he was getting better at it. She was surprised that he hadn't tendered his resignation yet, but he seemed determined to slog it out here.

If she wasn't careful, she was going to start admiring him.

The past week had been something of a nightmare for Darcy, too. Every time he thought he was getting a little more proficient at waiting tables, something came along to trip him up and make him realize he was a complete dunce.

Three months ago, if someone had told him he would feel like the world's greatest idiot, he would've laughed. Or at the very least, he would've thought about laughing. Now he felt very much like the dunce he was, because in spite of his pricey education he knew next to nothing about real life.

And Planet Earth Pizza was about as real as it got.

His first eleven-to-eight shift had nearly killed him. Not only was there the physical strain of standing on his feet for nine hours, but he went through two rushes, which meant two sets of customers, and two sets of coworkers to work with, including the prickly Caroline Benson, who still hadn't gotten the hint. She must really need the twenty bucks badly, Darcy had thought with an inward smile.

When he'd gotten home, he'd sat down on his couch and fallen asleep there. When he awoke seven hours later and tried standing on his feet to go to the bathroom, he'd nearly sobbed in pain. He'd soaked in the bathtub for an hour, which had helped somewhat, before realizing that he had to come back to work and do it all over again.

How he'd survived today, he didn't know. His feet went through alternating periods of numbness, which made him frightened to walk for fear he'd fall over, to agonizing pain. Fortunately for him, business was slower than the day before and Bubba, who'd taken over for Sean at five, told him to go home at six-thirty.

If the idea hadn't been so repugnant, Darcy would've kissed him. Instead, he went home and went straight to the bathtub again to soak his feet.

When he was done, Darcy wearily collapsed onto his couch, putting his feet up in a hopeless attempt to get the blood to drain away from them and leave them numb. They were throbbing so badly at the moment that he feared he would never to be able to walk again.

How the hell has Charlie done this for nine years?

Never in his life had he been through such mind-boggling hell. The customers, the mess little kids made from throwing food everywhere, the customers, the smell of pizza that still clung to his clothes though he'd been off work an hour, the rapidly frayed tempers of his co-workers, the customers...

Darcy glanced at the phone on his desk. It was sitting there, practically begging him to pick it up and call his aunt. He knew Ginger would understand if he caved in and went back to New York. God knew he couldn't put up with another weekend like this one had been, and he had a sinking feeling that he would be, quite soon, unless he made the call. But going to the phone would require walking, and he didn't think that was possible right now. Calling his aunt would have to wait, but it was something he was going to do.

Having made his decision, Darcy fumbled for the remote control to the television and clicked it on. He'd just switched the channel to MSNBC when...

"Hi, kids! Do you like Primus? Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids?"

The music was coming from directly downstairs, rattling his floorboards and making his headache even worse than before. Darcy groaned. He'd forgotten the party downstairs. Although he'd begged Elisabeth to keep it quiet, he had a feeling that it wasn't going to happen.

It was too much to be borne. The music would only be the beginning, if one could call that music. It was bad enough he had to listen to the neighbors downstairs playing "Afternoon Delight" every time they were in the mood, now this?

Thankfully, someone agreed with him about the music, because just as the performer-who had just identified himself as "Slim Shady"-got to talking about the English teacher who flunked him in junior high, the music stopped. He heard laughter coming from downstairs. It sounded like Charlie and a man who might be Jack Middleton.

Just as Darcy breathed a sigh of relief over the music being turned off and things settling down, heavy pounding on the door downstairs rattled his walls. Then the music came back on. This time, there seemed to be only one line to the song, repeated continually to something that sounded electronic. The voices downstairs rose as the music level did. There was more pounding at the door, followed by a voice-definitely Elisabeth's-yelling, "It's open!"

Darcy realized that if he wanted whatever was going on downstairs to stop, he was going to have to go down there himself and threaten to tell the landlady. With a supreme effort, Darcy swung his feet from their elevated perch and set them on the ground. He slowly raised his body from the couch, nearly wanting to yell in pain as his feet once again protested supporting his weight. Wincing with every step he took, he shuffled his way out the door and down the stairs.

He had just reached the bottom step when he saw Sean and his wife, Rachel. Sean was hefting a case of Keystone Light as Rachel knocked on the door.

"Hey, Darcy! How's it going?" Sean asked.

"Er...fine."

"Just got here?"

"I live upstairs."

Sean grinned. "Make sure you keep quiet about that, or half this party's gonna end up on your living room floor."

Not if I can help it.

Rachel pounded on the door again.

"It's open," Darcy muttered as the door swung open.

"Hi, Sean, Rachel. Come in, we're just getting started!" Elisabeth stood there holding a 7-Up and five playing cards in her hand. "Jenna's on her way in twenty minutes with all the beef stew and biscuits we can eat, and Kit's already here with her banana bread and guess what! Erin's here, and she brought shrimp dip!" She smiled.

"My favorite," Rachel said with a grin. "Maybe this time she'll actually give me the recipe."

Sean and Rachel entered but Darcy tried to remain out of sight just outside the door.

"Where should we put the beer?" Sean asked.

"Good luck trying to find room in the fridge. Chazz put his case in there, and Jack's got something in there, too. Lucy's got wine coolers and...well, like I said, good luck."

Darcy hoped to slink away before Elisabeth remembered that someone else had been standing in the hallway with Sean, but it was too late. She'd seen him. "Darcy! Aren't you coming inside?"

"Uh, well, I'm really tired..."

"Aah, you can stick around for at least one drink and say hi to Charlie."

Before he could excuse himself by saying he was too tired, what was Charlie doing off work, and by the way could they please turn down the "Can my honey come back" that kept repeating like a stuck needle on a record, Elisabeth smiled at him.

Darcy stood in the doorway, transfixed by Elisabeth's smile. He hadn't given her looks much thought, but when she smiled, she was devastating. Her smile reminded him of Charlie's in some ways. He smiled in return.

How long the two of them stood there, he knew not. He wasn't even aware he was staring until Charlie stepped outside, grabbed his arm, and dragged him into the apartment.

"I was hoping you'd show up!" she exclaimed as Elisabeth shut the door behind them. "You're not officially an employee at Planet Earth Pizza until you've been to one of the staff parties."

Looking around him, Darcy understood what she meant. About half the staff of Planet Earth Pizza was there-J.P. Thorpe, Jack Middleton, Kit Longbourne, Lucy Steele, Erin Jennings, Chazz Bingley, and one of the drivers he'd met only once and wasn't too familiar with.

"I'm glad you decided to join us," Charlie said, leading him into the kitchen.

"Actually-"

"Would you like a beer?"

"No, thanks. I don't like beer."

Charlie turned to him, smiling. "Thank God. I thought I was the only one." She opened the refrigerator door. "We have some wine coolers and Bacardi Breezers and someone brought tequila rose---oh, no, we're not allowed to have that. That's El's. She really should hide that before Caroline and Louisa get off work."

"They'll be joining us?"

"Probably. They never pass up a chance to get drunk and make exhibitions of themselves. Later on, when she gets the chance, my sister may stop by. And Elisabeth's sister is on her way."

"The famous Jenna?"

"Mm-hmm, so you'll finally get to meet her. Did you hear that Chazz finally asked her out?"

"Yes, I did." Chazz had called him first thing Tuesday morning to inform him of that.

"I wish he'd invited her somewhere other than bowling tomorrow night, but it's a start. So, what can I get for you?"

"Nothing. I'm..." Charlie took a step back from the refrigerator and accidentally stepped on his foot. He gasped in pain.

"Oh, God! I'm so sorry. Is anything broken?"

"I don't think so. It's nothing."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Most of the pain I'm feeling right now is from standing on them for so long."

"I know how that goes. My first day of work, I got conned into closing on a Friday night. I had no idea what the hell I was doing, and they asked me to close. The really bad part was, they told me to wear black shoes and the only pair I had were dressy flats."

Darcy didn't know much about women's shoes, but he was guessing that this was bad. "That sounds painful," he said.

"You can't even begin to imagine. I had blisters on my feet after eight hours of that torture." Charlie peered into the refrigerator before reaching in and taking out a bottle of Captain Morgan's rum. "I wish someone had given me what I'm about to give you."

"Rum?"

"Alcohol of any sort would've done. Do you like rum?"

"I'm not much of a drinker."

"Well, you have to have something. Look at it this way-the alcohol will take the edge off the pain in your feet." She shut the door and opened the cabinet next to the fridge. She took out a large glass, poured a hefty shot of rum into it, then reached for a bottle of Coke. She filled the rest of the glass with soda, then gave it a few stirs before handing it to him. "Here you go."

Darcy took the glass, wondering if he could get by with just holding the glass until he got to the bathroom to dump it. He decided that it wouldn't be polite to do after Charlie had gone to the trouble of making it for him.

Okay, then. One sip, maybe two, then down the drain. He took a drink and grimaced-the alcohol was strong, overpowering the Coke.

"Not for you?" Charlie asked.

"A little stronger than I would've made," he replied.

"Then it's just right for your feet."

Darcy took another sip and found that it wasn't quite as bad the second time around. "It gets better with time," he said.

"Good!"

"So what are you doing off work? Didn't you tell me you worked until eleven Saturday and Sunday?"

Charlie looked sheepish. "I do. After Elisabeth called me, I went out to get lunch and bought French dressing to go with it."

"French dressing?"

"Yeah. I can't even smell that stuff without wanting to throw up, so we're talking ultimate sacrifice. About an hour after I ate, I started complaining that my stomach was upset. Then, about two o'clock, I took a swig of it and that was that. I went home twenty minutes later."

"That was creative," Darcy said.

"I know. I'm probably going to feel very guilty tomorrow when I wake up hung over and remember that I could've done what I should've and worked, but honestly, right now I'm glad I did it. It has been a long weekend."

"Hey, Charlie, where's that CD of junk you downloaded from the Internet?" Elisabeth interrupted.

"I have two dozen CD's of junk I've downloaded from the Internet," Charlie replied. "Which one in particular do you want?"

"You know the one! It's got all those great Fatboy Slim songs on it."

"You mean the one I ripped out of the stereo and threw in the garbage at the last party we had?" Charlie turned to Darcy. "I love Fatboy Slim, but after hearing 'The Rockafeller Skank' fifty times, I was ready to pull my hair out."

"It beats 'N Sync!" Elisabeth pointed out. "That's what Chazz is threatening to put in."

"Chazz doesn't even like 'N Sync!"

"I know, but he's just in the mood, he says."

"I'll go get the CD," Charlie replied, rushing out of the kitchen toward her bedroom, leaving Elisabeth with Darcy.

The two of them eyed each other warily. Darcy wasn't sure what to say, so he took another drink of his rum and coke. Charlie returned a minute later with the CD, which she handed to Elisabeth.

"Thanks." With one last, puzzled look at Darcy, Elisabeth returned to the other room to change the music.

Chapter Fourteen

Elisabeth returned to her poker game, still feeling a bit dazed about what had gone on at the door.

Or rather, what she thought had gone on at the door.

"We need your cards, El," J.P. was saying, holding the rest of the deck in his hands.

Elisabeth looked down and was startled to find five cards in her hand. Then she remembered that she'd been in the middle of a game when she'd gotten up to get the door for Sean and Rachel. "Sorry," she mumbled, practically shoving them into J.P.'s hand.

J.P. shuffled and Elisabeth was able to replay "that moment" in her mind yet again, the moment when "hello" had suddenly become "Hello?" That was the way it seemed to her, anyway. She'd smiled at him and suddenly, he'd stared at her as though he'd never seen a woman before. It would've bothered her except that she'd been doing the exact same thing to him.

But why?

He'd smiled back, for one thing. It was the first time she could remember Darcy ever smiling. Well, now, that wasn't true. She was pretty sure he'd been having a good time at the bowling alley and he must've smiled then. And now that she thought about it, he'd smiled a couple of times the day she'd apologized to him. Which meant that the scene at the door---if there had been a scene at the door---made even less sense.

But it sure as hell made her feel guilty.

"Elisabeth? Are you planning on picking up your cards or are you going to stare off into space indefinitely?" Jack asked.

She flushed and realized that she was letting an incident that may only have been in her mind rattle her. "I'm in the game," she said, picking up her cards quickly.

"Are you okay?" Sean asked, startling her as she hadn't noticed that he'd joined the game.

"Yeah, I'm fine. A little loopy, that's all." She was saved from saying anything else by someone kicking the door. She got up quickly before whoever it was could kick a hole through it, saying, "I think maybe I should count myself out of this altogether."

Elisabeth opened the door, not entirely surprised to find Jenna on the other side of it, one hand carrying a large crock pot filled with stew, the other carrying a basket of biscuits.

"Why didn't you bring these in one at a time?" she berated her sister.

"Because I wasn't thinking," Jenna muttered as Elisabeth took the biscuits. "Oh, sure, take the light load."

"Hey, at least I'm helping out. Everyone, dinner's here!" she called as she set the biscuits down on the kitchen counter and just managed to dart out of the way of the oncoming rush.

Jenna set the crock pot down with a sigh of relief and pulled the cord out of her pants pocket, plugging it into the wall. "You'll have to wait about fifteen minutes for the stew to reheat!" she told them.

"To hell with that. There won't be anything to eat if I wait," Chazz said, opening up half a dozen cabinets in search of a plate.

"Shoot! I have plates, too," Jenna said. "They're in the car. Try and hold everybody off while I go get them, okay?"

"You must be kidding!" Elisabeth exclaimed. "They'll kill me first!"

Jenna darted outside without paying attention to what Elisabeth was saying. Elisabeth put her arms around the crock pot and refused to let anyone near it. Fortunately, she was helped by Charlie, who had stepped between her and the starved bunch surrounding them.

"If you want to eat, you'll keep back or I'll eat it all," Charlie said. "And you know I can do it."

That held them off just long enough for Jenna to squeeze her way through with a bag of paper plates.

"You're a life saver," Charlie said, passing them out as Elisabeth stepped out of the way. "I was afraid for a second that they were going to trample us to death."

"Sorry I'm so late," Jenna replied. "Mom wanted to know why I was cooking enough food to feed Effingham, then she wanted to know why you couldn't make this on your own."

"Because it's your top-secret family recipe, that's why."

Jenna snorted. "I stole it off a guy I dated in college, you know."

Elisabeth just grinned. "Yeah, yeah. I take it Mom didn't approve of you coming to my party?"

"She didn't care. She just had to ask the question about the food and ask if I'd leave some at home for her and Mel, which meant I had to make a little extra. Ah, there's the other crock pot! Thanks, Chazz." Jenna pointed to where she wanted him to set the other large container of stew. "Then I had to make extra biscuits, only I was out of flour so I used the canned biscuits. Then I got stopped by a train."

"It's worth it, Jenna," Jack said as he squeezed his way out of the kitchen and back to the poker table.

"Thanks, Jack-hey, save some for me, guys. Have I missed anything so far?"

Elisabeth turned away so Jenna couldn't see her face. She wasn't quite sure how to answer her sister's question because she didn't have a satisfactory answer for herself.

It was definitely my imagination. Darcy Williamson isn't about to give me the time of day. He likes Charlie. He doesn't particularly like me, and I don't particularly like him. All that happened in the doorway was a...a moment of confusion. Yes, that was it. Nothing more than that.

"No," she finally was able to reply. "Nothing special, unless you count your meal."

Charlie handed Darcy a plate, which he reluctantly took. "What on earth is this?" he asked, staring at the biscuit covered in beef, vegetables, and a thick brown gravy.

"It's Jenna Bennet's world-famous and absolutely divine beef stew, with homemade biscuits. Now, Jenna doesn't cook this very often, and certainly not for this many people, so enjoy it while you can." When Darcy still hesitated, Charlie smiled. "It's not poisoned, don't worry. And it really is good."

Darcy took the fork she offered him and hesitantly speared a chunk of meat. Oh, well, he thought, popping it into his mouth. The second he swallowed it, his eyes widened and he looked down at his plate with wonder.

"This is wonderful!" he exclaimed.

Charlie grinned. "I know. Jenna's a terrific cook. She had an offer to go to a culinary institute in Paris but her mother didn't want her going so far away to school. And she definitely didn't want any daughter of hers growing up to be a cook, or so it was understood."

"I'm beginning to get an idea of what Mrs. Bennet must be like," Darcy said before lifting another forkful of beef stew and biscuits to his lips. "Is your mother similar to her?"

"God, no!" Charlie exclaimed. "We're not first cousins. Her grandfather and my grandmother were brother and sister. I think that makes us second cousins."

"Oh, I see. I thought it was closer than that because the two of you seemed so close."

"We've been friends ever since our cousin Herbie pushed Elisabeth into the lake about twenty years ago."

"Excuse me?"

"We used to have our family reunions out at Lake Sara. We have this obnoxious cousin named Herbie and at one of the reunions, we were sitting with her sister Jenna on the dock when Herbie deliberately pushed El into the lake. She was wearing this exquisite white dress and she wasn't supposed to be getting dirty. Herbie thought it would be funny to do. He didn't think it quite so funny when I pushed him into the lake as retaliation. His mother was even less amused because he couldn't swim."

"Oops."

"Yeah, well, he was okay. And he didn't go near us after that, which was good. Four years ago, Elisabeth was looking to move out of her family's house and needed a roommate. I volunteered and soon after that, Jenna agreed to live with us as well until she moved away for a job in St. Louis."

"And then moved back in with her mother," Darcy added.

"How did you know that?"

"I was talking with Chazz."

"Well, the story's a little longer than that, but it's also very boring so we'll skip it. Want to play Trivial Pursuit? We'll annihilate the competition in minutes if you say yes."

"Maybe I should play on someone else's team in order to make it fair," Darcy said.

"Fair? Who wants to be fair? I don't." Charlie grinned. "You've got to learn to be aggressive."

"I thought it was assertiveness that you teach in psychology."

"Oh, it is. But not when it comes to trivia games. Jenna refuses to play me anymore."

"Why is that?"

"For some reason, she thinks I'm a sore loser."

Darcy laughed and allowed Charlie to lead him to the couch, where the board game had been set up. Erin, Kit, and Chazz were sitting around it.

"You guys are in luck. We're starting over and Darcy's going to be my partner," Charlie announced.

The others groaned. "That's not fair, Charlie!" Erin protested. "He's a brainiac like you. He should be on our team."

"All of you against me?"

"Considering the fact that you're smarter than the three of us combined, I'd say Darcy makes up the difference," Chazz said.

"Maybe I should sit this one out until another person shows up to make six," Darcy suggested. "And this way, I can get a good idea of what the game's is about."

"Okay," Charlie agreed. "It's probably not a good idea to ask you to think, anyway. You've been working all day."

Darcy sat on the sofa closest to Charlie's chair as Charlie took her seat back and a new game started. Darcy continued eating his food and contemplating just what had happened at the front door.

Surely he'd been dreaming it. Oh, not the smile. That he remembered with perfect vividness. Elisabeth had definitely smiled at him. But the rest of it, the lingering look and the jolt his senses had taken, and the thought that she might be interested in him as well...surely not.

He was her cousin's boyfriend, after all. And while he didn't know Elisabeth Bennet all that well, he would say with certainty that she wouldn't do something as low as steal her cousin's boyfriend. Especially not after her threat to him when he'd taken Charlie out for the first time. And not after she'd said she wouldn't tell her about the rest of Caroline's bet.

So that was out, which meant the whole episode was nothing, just his imagination. He'd had too much to drink, perhaps. Or, looked at another way, it meant he was a lousy dog. He was dating one girl and feeling attracted to her cousin.

Darcy felt his cheeks get red and so he looked down at his plate, studying it as though it were the most fascinating thing in the world. He was a lousy dog, because not only had he had a moment with Elisabeth, but for the first time he realized that he did find her attractive, in an odd sort of way. He'd never noticed her before, except on that first day he'd worked at Planet Earth Pizza when he'd called her tolerable, but she had a real glow about her.

This is the first time she hasn't been sick or tired or passed out since you met her.

Good God, man, what are you doing? You're going out with Charlie, not Elisabeth! You should be thinking of how pretty Charlie looks today in that blouse. It brings out her eyes. And she's smiling right now, too, and she has such a pretty smile. Just like Elisabeth's...

Darcy set his plate on the end table next to the chair and put his hands over his eyes, groaning softly so as not to alarm Charlie.

"Are you all right?" Charlie asked him. He took his hands away from his face to see that she was looking at him, concern in her eyes.

"Yes," he replied.

"Is it your feet still?"

Darcy nodded. Charlie quickly stood up and wove through the group, which seemed to be gaining in number since he'd last seen it, and walked into the kitchen. He saw her mixing him another drink. She got through the crowd again and handed the cup to him.

"Here you go. You must've misplaced your other one."

Darcy hadn't even realized he'd set it down, but he was grateful for the new glass as he took a sip. It was much better this time and he smiled.

"I went easier on the rum. I don't want you to get drunk and fall down the stairs trying to get back to your apartment."

"Very considerate of you," Darcy agreed, taking a healthier drink of the rum and Coke.

Although maybe drinking himself into oblivion was just the right thing to do. It would take his mind off of a pair of haunting green eyes that weren't in the face of the girl by his side.

By nine-thirty, the neighbors across the hall had already complained and Charlie had threatened to turn them in the next time they played "Afternoon Delight" at top volume, then invited them to join the party.

Just as the neighbors had been settled in with free beer from Sean, who had sent Rachel out to get more as he kept giving his away, a trio of rather unwelcome visitors arrived as Caroline, Louisa and Bubba arrived, fresh from work.

"Let's get this party started!" Caroline yelled. "Where's the beer!"

"You had to bring your own," Elisabeth replied. "Didn't you read the BYOB I put on the note on the bulletin board?"

"Don't worry, Caro, I bought all sorts of stuff," Lucy called to her. "It's in the fridge."

Caroline and Louisa wandered over to the refrigerator, where Elisabeth heard Caroline exclaim, "Tequila rose!"

Oh, hell. I forgot to hide that in my closet. Elisabeth sighed. Caroline was the last person in the world she wanted to share her rather expensive bottle of liquor with, but she wasn't in the mood to fight with her, either. Aah, what the hell. Caroline was a pain in the butt, but she was generous when it came to alcohol. She'd let Elisabeth have some tequila shots before.

"That's Elisabeth's!" shouted Charlie from across the room.

"It's okay, Caro," Elisabeth said when Caroline looked disappointed. "You can have it. I haven't been in the mood for it all night."

"Still feeling sick?" Caroline asked.

"Not today, actually, otherwise you wouldn't be here."

"Are you sure I can have this? Because I'll pay you for it if you want."

"Sure, go ahead. And don't worry about payment. We'll settle up at your next party."

Caroline beamed and reached for the shot glasses.

"You're too kind," Jack said, dealing the cards for another game.

"I think I'm done," Elisabeth told him as he tossed one her way.

"You sure?" Sean asked cheerfully, a healthy stack of chips in front of him.

"Yes, you cheater. You've cleaned me out."

"Hey, I do not cheat."

"Oh yeah? Then how come my aces are always marked when I play cards with you? It's easy to do with that rock on your hand." Elisabeth motioned to the ruby ring he wore on his pinky.

"I'm not the only one at this table with a ring," Sean objected.

"Are you calling me a cheater?" Jack asked. "Them's fightin' words."

"Oh, no," Elisabeth groaned. "Please, no throwing things."

"Would we do that?" Sean asked.

"Would you like to discuss the window I had to pay for the last time you two were at a party here?"

"See? He's a habitual cheater! I say we divide his chips amongst ourselves and vow never to let him play again," Sean said.

"If I'm the cheater, how come you've got more chips than I do?"

"Because you're crafty. You've busted Elisabeth out, made it look like my fault, and now you're going to go after me."

"Enough, you two," Charlie called from her chair, where the Trivial Pursuit game had been put away and the players scattered about the room. "Play another game."

"With a new deck of cards," Elisabeth muttered.

Caroline darted through the crowd over to the CD player, looking over the CD's available to be played. She frowned.

"Where's that 'N Sync you had last time?" she shouted to Elisabeth.

"In the garbage next to the Fatboy Slim," Charlie replied. "And it's not coming out, either."

"But I like 'N Sync!" Caroline protested.

"Too bad."

Elisabeth knew what Caroline had been hoping for-the chance for Darcy to see her shaking her butt and looking sexy. If Charlie hadn't protested, Elisabeth had intended to.

The thought of Darcy made Elisabeth glance over in his direction. He was still sitting on the sofa close to Charlie. Maybe it was her, but she thought she'd just seen his eyes dart her way.

Nah. That was just her. He wasn't looking her way.

And even if he had been, Caroline squeezed herself between him and Charlie, which deflected his concentration.

Caroline was practically sitting on his lap, and Darcy didn't like it one bit. At the moment she was reclining comfortably on the arm of the couch, but he knew this woman and he knew it wouldn't stay that way for long.

He'd once thought he'd seen it all when it came to women. If they weren't pretending to hate him because they were secretly angling for his supposed fortune, they were throwing themselves at him with such force that he practically had to hide at times. But none of them held a candle to Caroline Benson.

The woman was a piranha! Every time he turned around at work, there she was. Half the time they worked together, she was "volunteering" to help him out with his work, doing things he knew he should be doing. She was always helping out with a table and a couple of times he thought he'd seen her sneaking money onto tables that hadn't left him anything.

And of course, there were the questions. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't escape them.

"Hi, Charlie." Caroline smiled and gave Charlie a little wave before giving her best smile to Darcy. "Hey, you."

"Hello," he said politely.

"Did you make good money today?" she asked.

"No, actually, I didn't," he replied. "It was slow during the afternoon."

"Oh."

Darcy was about to turn back to Charlie and resume their talk about classical music-which he had been surprised to discover she enjoyed-when he felt Caroline's hand on his leg. He stiffened immediately and looked over at her. She gave him a coy smile but said nothing.

"Darcy?"

Oh, Lord. Charlie had noticed his reaction, although Caroline had positioned herself in such a way that her wandering hand wouldn't be detected. How on earth am I going to get myself out of this one?

"I see that Jenna made that beef stew she's so fond of," Caroline said, noticing his almost-empty plate. Darcy had gotten full before finishing it.

"Yes, she did."

"I tried it once. It's okay, but it's so fattening!" Caroline's hand had shifted and was now on the touching the top of his thigh, getting very close an area he didn't want explored.

"It is?"

"Yes. Well, she makes it homemade, which is even worse than the stuff you buy in cans at the store. Although, to be perfectly honest with you, the last time she brought it to a staff dinner I couldn't tell the difference between that and Dinty Moore. Maybe it was just me."

"It probably was," Charlie said. To Darcy's surprise, she didn't sound the least bit upset about Caroline's position near him.

But she probably can't see where Caroline's hand is, either.

"I envy some girls who can eat and eat without gaining a pound. I used to be one of those until I started living on my own. I gained fifteen pounds. Can you believe it? I looked like a blimp. But I realized that I was eating too much and not getting enough exercise, so I did what needed to be done. It took a lot of willpower."

"I'm sure it did."

"Yeah. Except for that brief time when I was first on my own, I've always had a lot of willpower and determination. I've found that it's done well for me so far. I've always felt sorry for those girls who didn't have willpower when it came to eating and just let themselves go. I don't suppose there's any of that stew left, is there, Charlie?"

Charlie set her jaw. "After Chazz and J.P. were done with it, no."

"Just as well. I had a slice of pizza and a salad at the store, and I'm stuffed."

Darcy was still trying to figure out how to stop Caroline's hand from getting a good feel when Charlie picked up his unfinished supper. "Mind if I finish this off?" she asked.

"Not at all," Darcy said, the absurdity of this situation hitting him. He was practically getting felt up by this brazen witch while his girlfriend calmly ate beef stew.

He was about to shove Caroline off of his lap when Charlie picked up the fork and jabbed at Caroline's leg with it.

"OUCH!" Caroline shouted, almost falling off the couch leg.

"Sorry," Charlie said with false sincerity. "I wasn't watching where I was sticking my fork."

Darcy looked at Charlie and saw the laughter in her eyes as Caroline stood up abruptly and went to join her friends in the kitchen.

"Two more seconds of that and I would've thought of doing the same thing," he told Charlie. "I didn't think you'd noticed. Why didn't you just say something?"

Charlie shrugged. "And give her the attention she wanted? Not hardly. Besides, this got the message across to her much faster than anything else."

The two of them burst into laughter and ignored Caroline, who was now glaring at them openly.

Chapter Fifteen

The party continued, though after midnight several of the partygoers decided they'd had enough and left. Erin had an early day, as did Kit and Jenna. Rachel was going shopping with her mother the next day and so she asked Jack if he would drive Sean home when the party finally ended. Jack agreed to that. Lucy got a phone call from her mother saying that her daughter was running a temperature, so she left. Bubba passed out and had to be dragged to J.P.'s car so he could take him home.

Eventually, the party was down to Elisabeth, Charlie, Caroline and Louisa, who were still giving Charlie dirty looks, Sean, Jack, Chazz, and Darcy. The party had settled into the living room, where the TV was turned on to ESPN. Sportscenter was on and the guys were groaning because both the Cardinals and Cubs had lost their games.

Charlie still occupied her chair, with Darcy to her right. On the couch next to Darcy was Jack, and on the other end was Sean. Chazz was sitting on the floor to Charlie's left. Caroline and Louisa occupied the love seat on the other side of the TV. Elisabeth had grabbed the chair Charlie used as a computer chair and placed it next to Sean on the couch. It wasn't an actual computer chair but was instead a rocking chair. She smiled as she thought of what a success her party had been, even if she was getting a little bored now.

Yeah, definitely what the doctor ordered for you.

"Charlie, where's your game?" Elisabeth asked suddenly, a burst of inspiration hitting her.

"What game?"

"You know what game. That one with all the questions, like 'Would you sleep with the person on your left?'"

"Oh, that game. Hang on, it's in my room." Charlie stood up, then looked at Jack and Chazz. "If either of you sits in my chair while I'm gone, you're dead."

Charlie disappeared into the hallway and her room. The moment she was out of view, Jack and Chazz lunged for her chair. Darcy burst out laughing along with the others as Jack ended up in the chair with Chazz sitting on his lap.

"You're a good friend, Charles, but get out of my lap or you're walking home."

Chazz responded by putting his arms around Jack's neck.

"Get outta my chair!" Charlie tried to sound menacing, but she was laughing along with the rest as Jack tried in vain to untangle himself from Chazz.

"You move, you lose," Jack told her.

"Don't make me sit on you two."

"I'll make you a deal. I'll let you and Darcy have this chair if you'll get him off me."

"Deal." Charlie tossed the box she was holding to Elisabeth, who barely managed to hang on to it. Charlie grabbed both of Chazz's arms and pulled. Chazz, realizing the futility of his task, let go of Jack's neck. After that, getting him off of Jack's lap was easy.

"Jerk," Chazz growled at Jack as he sat on the floor again, leaning against the left side of the chair for support. Jack got up and offered the chair to Darcy, who switched seats with him. Instead of sitting on Darcy's lap she opted to sit on the right arm of the chair with her legs across him. Her feet rested on Chazz's head.

"Hey! Your feet are in my way!" Chazz growled.

"No better place for 'em. What's your point?" she retorted, but moved her feet anyway.

"Do you want me to read?" Elisabeth asked.

"Since you're the only one who hasn't been drinking, you probably should. The rest of us would only mangle the questions."

"Okay." Elisabeth opened the box and took out a card. "Question: who will be more successful in ten years-the person on your left or your right?" She looked to her right-Caroline. On her left was Sean.

"Remember that your raise could be riding on this," Sean told her.

"In that case, definitely you," she answered. "Sorry, Caro. I need the money."

"It's okay. It was clearly a case of coercion."

"Yes, I constantly have to twist arms in order to puff up my fragile ego," Sean said before taking a drink of his beer.

Caroline looked at her sister, who was grinning. "Definitely Elisabeth," she said.

"What?!" Louisa shrieked as laughter ensued.

"Well, Elisabeth isn't married, she doesn't have a kid-two if we count Drew-"

"My husband isn't a kid."

"He acts like one," Darcy heard Chazz mutter. Jack and Charlie snickered.

"Then I guess between you and Chazz, Chazz is gonna be more successful." Louisa crossed her arms over her chest and looked pointedly at Chazz.

"I have to return the compliment because I think Louisa's going to be much more successful than you, Darcy. But then, I don't know you too well."

"That's okay, because now I have an excuse to say that I know Charlie will be more successful than you because she's going to write a screenplay about us and make us famous."

"Seriously?" Caroline exclaimed. "Am I gonna be in it?"

"I haven't started it yet! Dammit, Darcy, that was supposed to be a secret. And I never said I was writing about Planet Earth Pizza."

"But think of what an idea it would be! Planet Earth Pizza is nothing more than a real-life soap opera. You said it yourself. What more would you need to write a million-dollar screenplay?" Jack pointed out.

"I've always seen us as a Midwest version of Sex and the City myself," Caroline said.

"And that's only if you write about her love life," Chazz added. Caroline hurled an ice cube at him.

"Charlie? You're up," Elisabeth said, hoping to avoid an ice fight. "Darcy or Jack?"

"Actually, Darcy, much as I would love to say you, I have to say Jack because one of these days, he's finally going to come to his senses, leave the store, and open a computer repair shop. Then he can come back and charge to store beaucoup bucks to fix the computers, which he does right now for free."

"Thanks!" Jack laughed.

"You could make millions on the store's computers alone," Sean muttered.

Jack looked from Charlie to Sean. "Since I have a raise coming soon, I'd better say Sean, too."

"I'm sensing a pattern here," Elisabeth said.

"Yeah, well, just remember that you started it," Sean replied. "I can't answer because I don't want to be accused of favoritism."

"Cop out," Jack said. "It's okay, Sean. You can admit that I'm your favorite."

Sean grinned. "I wasn't going to say that."

Everyone burst into laughter again and Elisabeth pulled another card out of the box. "Okay, okay. Next question: who is the is the most creative person in the room?"

"Charlie!" Everyone said this, nearly in unison. Charlie just shook her head and said, "We'll see."

Elisabeth dug through the box and pulled out another random question. "Who's the biggest flirt? I'll start-Chazz."

"I don't flirt!" Chazz protested.

"Please! You hit on anything with two X chromosomes!" Jack retorted.

"Do not."

Caroline said, "I agree with Elisabeth that it's Chazz."

Chazz looked outraged, but fortunately, he wasn't going to be the unanimous choice. Louisa, with a look that implied she was getting revenge for Caroline choosing Elisabeth to be more successful than her, said, "I think you're a bigger flirt than Chazz, Caroline."

It was then Caroline's turn to look outraged, but she apparently gave it some thought because a minute later, she said, "Well, okay, I admit it."

Chazz grinned and said, "Good, because you were my choice, too."

"Only because it would look bad to say your own name," Charlie told him. Chazz reached up and tickled the bottom of Charlie's foot. She squealed and moved her feet out of reach, nearly hitting Darcy's head with her knee in the process.

After Charlie and Jack agreed that Chazz flirted too much, Darcy again abstained because he didn't know either of them well, and Sean cast his vote for Caroline, Elisabeth continued with the next question.

"If you could be with one celebrity, who would it be?"

"Oooh, I'll start this one!" Caroline squealed. Her brow furrowed. "Wait a minute. I can't decide between Matt and Ben."

"How generic," Charlie said.

"Excuse me?"

"Generic. I suppose they're good looking, but-"

"Just good looking? Charlie, they're absolutely hot."

"They're not handsome enough to tempt me."

Elisabeth started, recognizing the phrase and giving her cousin a warning glare. Charlie smiled sweetly.

Why did she say that? She's the one dating him.

"You're nuts, Charlie. That's all I can say," Caroline said.

Louisa had also given the matter some thought. "Jude Law."

"Yes," Charlie agreed. "He is something else."

Darcy looked at her quizzically. "Is there something I should know?" he asked.

Charlie snorted. "It's not likely that I'll ever meet him, but there's a reason I wore out two copies of The Talented Mr. Ripley, and it wasn't Matt Damon."

"I hate questions like this," Chazz said.

"Too many to name?" Elisabeth asked.

"Yeah. If I were to get with someone, she'd combine a lot of the features I like in the famous women I like. She'd have Alicia Silverstone's hair, Jennifer Love Hewitt's face, and---"

"And Sarah Michelle Gellar's body," Jack finished. "But only when she's playing Buffy. He's hated every movie she's been in."

That brought some laughter, but Chazz defended his last choice. "I like a woman who could probably whip my butt!" he said. "I think it's sexy."

"That's insulting to all of them," Louisa said.

"Why?"

"Because by doing that, you're saying that only one part of a woman is okay and the rest of her can hang. You'd take one woman's body but you don't want her face. You want another woman's hair but not the rest of her. The world isn't like that. You may love a person's smile but hate her legs, but if want the smile you have to accept the bad legs that go with it."

"Not necessarily. In this day and age, anything can be altered with a good plastic surgeon," Charlie said. "But you're right, Louisa. It is insulting."

"Oh, yeah? Let's just turn this around. Who would you choose, Charlie? She's said this before, that she'd choose someone who looked like that guy who was in Bridget Jones's Diary with-"

Charlie objected. "I'd take Colin Firth any day of the week."

"Yeah, but you wouldn't mind if he had a body like what's-his-name who plays center field for the Cardinals, now would you?"

Charlie turned crimson. "Next person, please."

"This is a true story, swear to God. Jack and I go with Charlie and her friend Shannon to a Cards-Cubs game in St. Louis, and all they could talk about was this guy's butt. What was his name?"

"Edmonds, I think," Jack said.

"Shannon was the one going on about his butt, thank you very much."

"I didn't hear you disagreeing with her about it."

"You're right, I wouldn't kick him out of my house for eating crackers in bed. But at least Shannon and I weren't as bad as the girls two rows behind us. Every time the Cardinals changed pitchers and he was on one knee to rest, they'd scream, 'We'll marry you, Jim!' And when they weren't begging him to marry them, they were after J.D. Drew." Charlie downed nearly half of her rum and Coke.

"So if both of these guys showed up at the door and said you had to choose one of them, which one would you go with?"

Charlie didn't answer.

"See? You can't choose any more than I can. I think I won the argument." Chazz was looking decidedly pleased.

"Matthew McConaughey," Charlie said.

"What?"

"If I could only have one celebrity, I'd choose Matthew McConaughey. God was having a good day when he created that man."

"He can't act," Jack muttered.

"So? I'd be content to just gaze upon him for a long time. He wouldn't have to say a word. What about you, Darcy?"

"Oh, Lord...I don't know. I guess I'd choose...um...well, this is embarrassing."

"Nothing is embarrassing right now. We're all drunk, except Elisabeth, and none of us will remember anything in the morning. So go ahead," Caroline encouraged.

"Okay, then. I'd have to say that I wouldn't mind being with Kate Winslet."

Jack groaned. "Not another Titanic lover."

"No, actually, Sense and Sensibility. I never saw Titanic. But there's always been something about a British accent that I couldn't resist."

"Attracted to the accent? That is weird," Caroline said.

"No, not really. I like Irish accents myself," Charlie admitted.

"You've read one too many of those J.D. Robb books," Louisa said with a grin. "And so have I. I agree with you."

Chazz looked at Charlie. "So your perfect guy would have to have Colin what's-his-name's face, Matthew McConaughey's body, and talk like...like..."

"Roarke," Charlie finished with a sigh.

"You don't even know what he sounds like," Elisabeth pointed out. "He's just a book character."

"Yeah, but I have a pretty good idea."

"God save us all from fictional heroes," Jack said. "As for me, I'd have to go with a somewhat more mature woman, since I think I'm officially the oldest person in the room. Yes, friends, I must confess to having a secret tendre for none other than Sharon Stone."

"Yes!" Chazz agreed. "Basic Instinct."

"Absolutely. That and Casino, although she had some pretty bizarre hairstyles in that movie." Jack smiled. "What about you, Sean?"

Sean paused for only a second. "I'm not into that sort of thing. Besides, I'm married."

"Translation: we know his wife and if she hears about this, she'll kill him," Elisabeth said.

"That leaves us with you, Elisabeth. Which celebrity would you drag to a Las Vegas chapel right this minute if he appeared?" Chazz asked.

"Well, I wouldn't mind Ben Affleck-"

"See? Everyone goes with him, or else they go with Matt. That just proved my theory," Charlie said.

"Maybe that's because everyone else in the world can see that they're totally gorgeous," Caroline retorted.

"We need variety in life."

"And I do like Lance from 'N Sync-"

"A member of a boy band? That's a twelve-year-old's choice, El," Charlie protested.

Elisabeth glared at her. "If you're gonna make fun of my choices, I'm packing up my game and going home."

"I hate to inform you of this, but that's my game and you are home."

Elisabeth decided to let that one pass. "My top choice would have to be Nicolas Cage."

"An excellent choice," Charlie said.

"So glad you approve," Elisabeth replied sarcastically.

"Nicolas Cage?" Louisa wrinkled her nose. "Why would you go with him?"

"He's totally hot, that's why. Did you see him in Con Air?"

"I did. I watched that with Rachel when it first came out. She was practically drooling all over the screen," Caroline said.

"HEY!" Sean roared, to the laughter of everyone else in the room. "I'm not allowed to say that I wouldn't mind spending some time with Faith Hill but she gets to drool all over Nicolas Cage?"

"Woman's prerogative," Charlie answered.

"I think I'm going to having a talk with my wife when I get home," Sean muttered.

Elisabeth pulled another card out of the box. "Interesting question: What do you feel is the biggest mistake you ever made?"

"Filling out an application at Planet Earth Pizza," Charlie called out. "I think that holds true for all of us."

"Besides the obvious. That's not a personal mistake, it's just a general mistake, and I'll start. The biggest mistake I made was sleeping with George Wickham. I knew he was a jerk and a player and I did it anyway. And for the life of me, I don't know why. All I know is, in the end he stripped me of my store and a chunk of my pride." She looked over at Caroline. "Your turn."

Caroline pursed her lips. "I don't know that I like this question too much," she said.

"Too many things to regret?" Charlie asked sweetly. Elisabeth fought the urge to laugh. She noticed that everyone but Louisa and Caroline had the same problem.

"Seriously, I think the biggest mistake I ever made was moving out of my parents' house. I had it made there-free rent, free food, I could do what I wanted. Now that I'm on my own I'm lucky to have any money at all and I can't do anything."

No one could argue with Caroline's choice, as it was one many of them had considered choosing for their own.

Louisa looked thoughtful. "I'm not sure if I should say...." she started. "I guess it would have to be not taking Drew's parents up on their offer of land near theirs to build a house on."

"They offered you a place to live?" Caroline gasped.

"Yeah, but would you want to live near his parents? Near his mother? She'd be over every day telling what I was doing wrong with Valerie."

"I think several of us have an opinion about that," Elisabeth heard Jack whisper to Sean.

"I was pregnant at the time and she was all in my face about how I should quit smoking. I told her that my mom smoked while she was pregnant with me and I turned out fine. But she ticked me off so much that I refused the offer. Now I wish that we had, because it would be a lot less expensive living out there than it is to live here in town."

"I don't care what a pain in the butt the woman was, if she was offering you free land to build a house, I'd take it." Caroline gave her sister a "what-are-you-an-idiot?" look.

Chazz had his eyes half closed.

"I think we're about to lose Chazz," Elisabeth observed.

"No, no, I'm just thinking," Chazz said, sitting up. "I think the biggest mistake I made was staying with Josie for so long. Especially in that last year. I knew I had feelings for Jenna, which wasn't fair to either of them. But I'd been with Josie for so long that I didn't think it would be right to dump her for someone else. In the end, that's what she did to me and all I could think about at the time was, 'Why did we waste so much time when we were both in love with other people?' That was my mistake."

"That brings us to you, Darcy," Caroline said eagerly.

Elisabeth sighed. Hadn't Caroline gotten the hint already? Darcy couldn't be any more obvious in his preference for Charlie. She was the one sitting on his lap, for God's sake!

"I'm not sure what the biggest mistake I ever made was," Darcy said. "I've made so many little mistakes through the course of my life that I don't think any one of them could be singled out as the worst."

"I think we could all say that," Charlie agreed.

"I guess if there was one thing I could single out as a big mistake, it would be that I haven't really fought hard for the things I want in life. My...former guardian took control of my life after my parents died and I haven't done anything to take it back since then. I do what she wants me to do. I..." Darcy's cheeks started going red and he didn't finish.

A silence descended on the room. Finally, Caroline asked, "What does your guardian think of your being here?"

Darcy fidgeted for a second. "She doesn't know I'm here. And she wouldn't approve."

"Wouldn't you say that this is a step towards taking control of your life?" Jack asked.

Darcy was looking more uncomfortable by the second. "I would. So my mistake was that I didn't do it sooner."

Elisabeth glanced at Sean, who was looking at his beer as though it were the first one he'd ever seen in his life. Something is definitely going on here, she thought. There has to be a way to find out the truth. But not here, not in front of Sean. He'd kill me.

"Okay, Charlie, you're up. The biggest mistake of your life."

"Not getting to a specialist sooner," she answered. "My dermatologist said that what I have might not have shown up in the biopsy results any sooner than it did, but maybe I could've gotten something to prevent it from getting this far. But I didn't, so it spread and here I am."

"You couldn't have known, Charlie," Jack said.

"I should've guessed when it didn't go away, right? But I didn't. I was so stupid that I thought maybe it would eventually go away on it's own and told myself not to worry about it." Charlie stood up abruptly. "I need another drink. Move on to the next person." She walked into the kitchen.

Jack sighed. "I shouldn't have said anything," he said quietly.

"Don't beat yourself up about it, Jack," Sean told him.

"You can tell Charlie's had too much to drink when she goes on one of her self-pitying sprees," Caroline said just a touch too loudly.

Bang. Charlie slammed the door of the refrigerator.

"My biggest mistake goes along the same lines as Chazz's," Jack said. "Only I wasn't with one woman when I loved another. From the day I met this woman----and don't ask me to name her because I won't----I knew I loved her. I was too scared to tell her anything. She's got a boyfriend now, and I've been kicking myself ever since because I didn't say anything to her."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Louisa asked.

Jack looked at his soda and muttered, "I wish I had a beer. Why the hell did I agree to take you home again?" he asked Sean.

"Something about sucking up to the boss," Louisa said.

"Right. I remember now."

Chazz grinned. "What about the girl?" he asked.

Jack glared at him but continued. "This girl----woman, I should say----she's very smart. She's got a future ahead of her. She knows what she wants out of life, and I don't. I'm content with the direction my life is in. I work at a pizza place. I just accepted a job to teach introductory computer classes at the Kluthe Center this fall."

"You what?!" Charlie shrieked. "You didn't say anything about that!"

Jack grinned. "I just accepted the job yesterday. But it's not full time and it's not something I'll be making a lot of money doing, which means I'll still just be a cook in a restaurant. What sort of future is that to offer a...a woman who, once she gets what she wants, will be embarrassed to admit to being seen with a guy like me?"

"What makes you think this woman would do that?" Charlie asked, returning to the living room with a fresh drink.

"Because the guy she's with now...is different from me. That's how I know." Jack took a drink from his soda can.

Sean drummed his fingers along the arm rest of the couch. "I don't know how to answer this question," he said. "I've made mistakes, yes, but I don't think I could label one and say that I wished it had been different. If I had gone to college instead of joining the Army, I wouldn't have met Rachel. If I hadn't started working for Planet Earth Pizza, I wouldn't be the manager and making a decent salary. I have a regret, but it's a personal one and not something I'm going to share with the rest of you. I'm sorry, but it's not only my regret and since Rachel's not here to give me the okay, I'm not going to say anything."

"Fair enough," Caroline said. "On to the next question."

The game continued on for another hour before Sean decided he'd had enough and wanted to go home. Since Jack was his ride, Jack had to leave and they took a decidedly pasty-looking Chazz with them. Caroline and Louisa both decided that it was time for them to go and left, and Elisabeth's party was officially over.

Continued In Next Section