Beginning, Section II, Next Section
Posted on Monday, 20 June 2005
"Will!" William heard his name being called from the front of the house. He smiled; it was his little sister. Well, not so little anymore. She was 21 and living on her own. However, no matter how old she was, he would always think of her as his baby sister.
William walked out to the living room. Georgiana was taking off her coat and gloves. "Hey Georgie!"
"Will!" Georgiana ran over to her brother and gave him a big hug.
"Well, I guess you're glad to be home." He joked.
"I am just so happy that my finals are over that I am glad to be anywhere but school! But yes, I am glad to be home too. Where's Lizzy? Aren't you two joined at the hip or something?" she laughed.
Will paused for a moment before answering. "She's just upstairs I think. Let me go get her while you say hello to Mrs. R, she's in the kitchen." Georgiana was gone before he even finished talking. As he headed for the stairs, he heard a shriek from the old lady and a lot of laughing.
"Elizabeth?" William called as he searched for her upstairs.
"Yeah?" Her voice had come from their bedroom. William made his way down the hall.
William poked his head in the door. "Georgie's here." He said. Elizabeth was sitting on the bed looking at a big book in her hands. She did not look up. William walked into the room and came over to the bed. He saw that she was looking through and old photo album. He sat down next to her on the bed. "What year are those pictures?" Elizabeth's head snapped up.
"I didn't hear you come in." She tried to close the book but William stopped her and took it himself.
"These are pictures of our first Christmas together." He turned a few pages and let out a low chuckle. "Do you remember this? We were at your parent's house for Christmas dinner and your mom was lecturing you on something or other. I got a picture of it just as you looked away and started rolling your eyes. Your dad asked for a copy of that." William was still laughing to himself. Elizabeth was looking at the picture on the next page. When he saw that she was not laughing anymore, William followed Elizabeth's eyes to where they rested on the next page. It was a picture of William dipping Elizabeth for a kiss under the mistletoe.
"Georgiana is waiting for us downstairs." William abruptly closed the photo album and walked toward the door.
"William?" He did not turn around.
"Come on, Mrs. Reynolds has peanut butter cookies for you in the kitchen." William was out of the room by the time he finished talking. Elizabeth took a deep breath and headed down after him.
Elizabeth and Georgiana had a close relationship, almost as close as she and Jane. In fact, it might even be harder to keep their secret from Georgie since she knew how to read her brother fairly well and she would be with them constantly, unlike Jane. She would only have to try to fool Jane for a few hours at a time. She knew any longer than that would be futile. But Georgie? That was a different story.
"Lizzy!" Georgiana ran up to Elizabeth as soon as she had reached the bottom step.
Elizabeth laughed and returned the embrace in full force. "Someone's happy to be here apparently!"
"That's just what Will said! You two grow more alike daily. It's kind of freaky!" William and Elizabeth smiled indulgently at their little sister. "Mrs. R has cookies for you in the kitchen Lizzy, they're great!" Said Georgie as she bit into one.
"Thanks." Elizabeth laughed as she gathered up some of Georgie's bags and headed for the stairs. William was already ahead of her with his sister's suitcase.
"So, what do we have planned for these two weeks while I'm here? I don't want to miss anything fun." Georgie asked as she and Elizabeth walked up the steps.
"Well, tomorrow I thought that maybe you, Jane, and I could go shopping or something before my parents come over for dinner. Then Tuesday is Kitty's Bridal Shower. Wednesday you and I need to go to church for the choir rehearsal in the evening. Thursday there are fittings for the dresses. Friday is Christmas Eve; all the family will be here for dinner. That ought to be fun. On Christmas day, the three of us are going to Aunt Susie's house for dinner. Let's see. Sunday there are the final fittings after church. Tuesday is the rehearsal dinner. Wednesday is the Wedding. And then, Friday is New Years Eve. I think we have your vacation booked already, kiddo."
"Well, it sounds great. Lizzy, promise me you will talk to Will for me so he doesn't make me play the piano in front of all those people."
"Why? You play beautifully."
Will joined in their conversation. "It will be just family, Georgie."
Georgie looked at her sister pleadingly. "I'll talk to him, don't worry." She whispered
After getting all of Georgiana's things settled in her room, the three of them made their way down stairs to continue decorating the tree before dinner. Georgie was telling them all about school and about her experience sharing an apartment with Kitty; anything she could think of really. However, it seemed that her brother and sister-in-law were not in the most talkative mood.
"So..." Georgie looked around the room, waiting for someone to say something. No one did. She looked at the ornament in her hand. It was a glass angel hanging by a red ribbon. "This one is pretty, Lizzy. Where did you get it?"
Elizabeth looked over to the ornament in question. She paused before she answered. "Ireland."
"Oh, it's one of the 'honeymoon ornaments'. You guys came back with like twelve different ornaments from all the countries you visited."
"There were a lot of good shops around." Said Will from the other side of the tree.
"Still. I would have expected you to do more than just shop for Christmas tree ornaments on your honeymoon, Will."
Elizabeth went back to the box and busied herself in unwrapping another ornament. William gave his little sister the 'I'm-tired-don't-go-there-right-now' look.
Georgie looked back at her brother in confusion. What had she said? She often joked about their honeymoon. And she always got a provocative little quip from Lizzy to her brother in reply. She then always got this feeling of being in the way. But today, things just seemed strange. No one was really talking, save herself. Lizzy still had a whole plate full of peanut butter cookies to eat sitting right in front of her, untouched. Georgie looked at her sister for a moment.
"Lizzy, are you pregnant!?" Georgiana exclaimed.
Elizabeth's head snapped up. "What?!" she sputtered. She glanced over at William who was looking right back at her with the same surprised expression.
"Well, everyone seemed to be acting so weird and you haven't even touched your cookies and...I don't know...I just thought..."
"No. No, of course not. Trust me, Georgie. If I were pregnant, you would be the first to know. Besides," Elizabeth muttered more to her herself, "the last thing William and I need right now is a baby." Elizabeth moved over to the tree to hang her ornament. Consequently, she did not see the hurt expression on William's face as he put down the ornament in his hand and left the room.
Dinner was a tense affair. Everyone was a little on edge. Lizzy was still a little flustered by the pregnancy comment and William's strange reaction to the photo album. William was still trying to gain control over his emotions after Elizabeth's, albeit unconscious, slight. Georgiana was trying not to make anymore grievous errors in speech. She saw how her comments earlier had caused the tension to increase.
After dinner the group decided that a movie would be the best choice. Many options were suggested but in the end, the Christmas classic, White Christmas, won. Georgie settled into the large chair on the right side of the room as usual. This left William and Lizzy on the couch. William sat down in the corner of the couch, facing the TV, one leg stretched out along the length, the other leg still on the ground. He looked up at Elizabeth who was watching him and shaking her head. William raised his eyebrows at her and motioned with his hands to join him. It would look at little odd if she sat somewhere else. This was the position they had always watched television in. It was by far the most comfortable. Elizabeth took a deep breath, glanced over at Georgie, who was putting the tape in the VCR, and let out a sigh. She knew she had no other choice. Georgie already suspected something. Without looking William in the eye, Elizabeth sat down in front of him on the couch. She gingerly leaned back against his chest as William encircled her with his arms. How she would ever focus on the movie, she did not know.
"Georgie, could you grab the blanket off the couch in my study?" asked William.
"Sure." Georgiana hurried out of the room.
"Would you sit still? Liz, you're going to have to get used to this. It's really only day one, you know."
"What about yesterday, what do you call that." Elizabeth asked annoyed.
"Practice."
Georgiana entered the room again before she could reply, and threw a blanket on the couch.
"Thanks," mumbled Elizabeth, as she struggled to cover the two of them.
"Calm down." William whispered in her ear. He pulled her back against him, a little too roughly for Elizabeth's taste at the moment, which earned him a glare. William mumbled an apology before he turned his attention to the movie.
Phil Davis: When what's left of you gets around to what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting, whatever it is you've got left.
Elizabeth shifted a little in William's arms. He could feel her giggling at the movie.
Phil Davis: I want you to get married. I want you to have nine children. And if you only spend five minutes a day with each kid, that's forty-five minutes, and I'd at least have time to go out and get a massage or something.
Phil Davis: How can a guy that ugly have the nerve to have sisters?
Bob Wallace: Very brave parenting.
When the movie was over William attempted to sit up, nudging Elizabeth to do the same. She did not move. Georgiana came around the chair and started to laugh.
"She hardly ever makes it to the end of a movie when she's that comfortable. Don't wake her. You take her upstairs and I'll finish cleaning up down here then go to bed. Night, Will."
"Night."
William looked at the bundle in his arms. He wished he could stay like this a little longer. She looked so peaceful. But he knew he would fall asleep too if he didn't get her upstairs.
Gracefully, William managed to shift Elizabeth so that she was lying across his lap. Gently he picked her up and carried her up stairs. Halfway up the steps, Elizabeth started to wake. She slowly opened her heavy eyelids for a moment before shutting them again. She murmured something in her sleep that William could not make out when she wound her arms round his neck and nuzzled her face into his shoulder.
I'll be home for Christmas
You can count on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
and presents on the tree
William silently set Elizabeth down on the bed and covered her with the blankets. He bent his head down toward her face but stopped short and pulled away. He stood over her only for a moment before he left the room.
Elizabeth opened her eyes when she heard the door close. She had woken up when William laid her on the bed. Through the darkened room, she could just see the contours of his face. She felt content in his arms. He had carried her upstairs and tucked her in just as he had always done. He did not need to. There was no one watching now, but he did it all the same. Elizabeth quickly closed her eyes when she saw her husband leaning closer. She waited, but nothing happened. She did not know whether to feel relieved or disappointed. With those thoughts tumbling in her mind, Elizabeth drifted off into a troubled sleep.
William walked slowly down to the library. He sat in a large armchair by the window and looked out into the night sky. He could not let himself lower his guard to her if she was not responsive. It was torturing him. He loved that woman upstairs more than he could express, but she knew how to push his buttons. And when she did, she pushed them all at once. It made him so frustrated with her that he could scream, and often did. However, no matter how mad he got, he still loved her. It was something he could not stop. What if Elizabeth did not love him anymore? What would he do? He had already experienced living without her and he did not like it one bit. Had Elizabeth had as terrible of a time without him as he had without her? But, what was he supposed to do!? Go crawling back to her on his knees and beg her to forgive him? She could laugh in his face. He would not beg. No matter what. He had his pride after all. Although, maybe a little more than most.
Confused and tired he succumbed to sleep.
Christmas Eve will find me
Where the love light gleams
I'll be home for Christmas
If only in my dreams
The morning dawned on the Darcy home in all of its glory. Not as much could be said for the occupants inside. William woke up stiff and grumpy. He had spent all night in that chair in the library. And to top it all off, his in-laws were coming to dinner today.
Elizabeth woke up to find herself alone in bed. William's side of the bed had not even been touched. She wondered where he was. Maybe he was having second thoughts about their plan. He would tell her this morning that he did not want to go on with this charade and it would be best if she just left before things got any worse. It was a possibility. Then again, maybe he just fell asleep somewhere else. Elizabeth hoped it was the latter. She got out of bed, changed out of yesterday's clothes and took a shower.
William remained in the library when he heard the shower in their room turn on. The library was almost directly underneath their bedroom. What a way to start another morning. They were going to have to get better at this.
After Elizabeth had showered and dressed, she ventured down stairs for a hot cup of tea. As she reached the base of the stairs, she saw William saunter out of the library, still in yesterday's clothes. His hand was rubbing the back of his neck as he rolled his head from side to side. His curls had fallen down over his forehead and were sticking up on the left side of his head. He had obviously had about as good of a rest that night as she had. When he saw her, he stopped and looked at her. After searching her face and not finding any sign of love from last night, he continued on to the kitchen.
Elizabeth watched him leave. He had not said anything. After all that had happened last night. Why had he not come to bed? What did he mean by that look he gave her last night? Of course he was not aware that she was awake, but even after all that, he could at least have the decency to say something.
Elizabeth calmly waked into the kitchen, once again not looking at William. This seemed to be a repeat of Saturday morning. This time Elizabeth was the first to speak. With her back facing her husband as she poured her tea she said, "Georgie, Jane, and I are going shopping today. I'll be back around three to help Mrs. Reynolds with the dinner. Remember that my parents, Jane and Charles and the boys, and Caroline are coming over tonight so if Mrs. Reynolds asks there will be ten of us for dinner." Her tone was very business like. "Oh, and remember to put away anything you don't want Connor and Nathan to get into. I'm sure you don't want a repeat of last time." With that, she left the room.
William thought back to the last time the Bingley family had been here for dinner. As much as William loved his nephews, they were very exuberant children. He had been placed in charge of supervising the little tykes until dinner was ready. He loved playing with them, hearing them call him Unca Will. Lizzy would always laugh at this because she thought it sounded like they were saying 'hunk-a-Will', which she very much agreed with. But William knew what they meant. The three males had a very close bond. As he put it, it was something that she, as a female, would never understand. William had turned his back on the bouncy two year olds for just a minute to answer the phone. When he left, they had been contently drawing on pads of paper on the floor. Obviously they had thought that a whole pad of paper would not suit their needs adequately for when William came back he saw that his legal brief, for his court case the next day that had been laying on his desk, was now decorated in neon green and orange crayon. The judge had a good laugh at William's expense over that. William smiled meekly and said, "My nephews, Sir. One thing I should have learned from law school was to never underestimate the opposition." The judge simply laughed some more.
William headed straight for his study to tidy up. He wanted to make sure he did not forget to do it later.
"So, Jane, when do mom and dad get here today?" Elizabeth asked while continuing to munch on a cinnamon roll in the food court of the mall.
"Oh, they got here this morning. They're watching the boys while I'm here."
"Where's Charles?"
"I think he and Will had plans to do some Christmas shopping of their own. That's what he told me anyway."
"Oh." Elizabeth wondered why Will had not said anything about it to her. Well, she had not really given him the opportunity to say much of anything to her this morning.
"Jane," asked Georgiana, "Do people usually get your twins the same thing for Christmas so they don't fight over it or do they get them each something different? I can't seem to make up my mind."
"Both actually. I usually get two of the same thing as a big present and two different things as little gifts. It doesn't really matter so much now that they're so young, but that's my plan for when they get a little older."
"Good. Um, do you two think we could stop by the Toys-R-Us before we leave?"
Jane and Elizabeth laughed. "Doing our Christmas shopping a little late, are we?"
"Well, do you have everything you need yet?" Georgiana countered. "I didn't see a gift from you to Will under the tree the last time I checked, although I saw one from you to everyone else."
"Well...I...okay fine. I'm not done either. You have to help me. I can't seem to find anything I want to get him. He has everything. What could he need?"
"But Lizzy, you usually get Will the best present. You're so creative. Just use some of that creativity you have stored up and find him something no one else would think of, something that is memorable."
Memorable? Elizabeth was not sure she wanted Will to remember this Christmas in all its detail. "Well, let's get shopping girls. No time to waste. I need to find this 'memorable' gift before we leave."
The trio shopped all over the mall in the search for the perfect gift, but nothing could strike their fancy. Elizabeth finally sat down on a bench by a large fountain and let out an exasperated sigh. "I knew this would be difficult, but I never expected it to be this tough." Jane and Georgiana came to sit by her. Jane put a comforting hand on her sister's arm.
"Lizzy. Are you all right? You've been acting strange for several days now."
"I'm fine." She answered quickly. "Come on. It's almost two-thirty. We should probably head back." Elizabeth got up from the bench and started walking in the direction of the car. Jane and Georgiana remained a little bit behind.
"She's not pregnant." Offered Georgiana. "I asked her that last night and got some hostile looks from Will." Georgiana conspiratorially bent in to talk to Jane. "I think it's a touchy subject. I wouldn't mention it in front of him if I were you." Jane raised her eyebrows and looked ahead at her sister. Hmmm?
Elizabeth was putting the finishing touches on the vegetable and cheese platters when the doorbell rang. She wiped her hands on the dishtowel and started for the door when she heard William yell out, "I'll get it!" She saw him walk toward the door while adjusting his tie. He opened the door. In walked Jane, carrying Connor on her hip, holding a dish with foil over it in her other hand, and sporting a diaper bag over her shoulder. After she greeted William with a kiss on his cheek, she deposited Connor in his arms and headed for kitchen. Following Jane was Mr. Bennet. He greeted his son-in-law with a strong handshake and a 'Will-my-boy! I hope you're treating my little Lizzy well' Just as he always did. To this, William would typically answer 'I sure hope so, Sir' but tonight he simply smiled and averted his eyes.
Next came in a fluttering Mrs. Bennet. She was talking a mile a minute, asking Charles if they had 'remembered to turn off all the lights, and whether they had brought enough changes of clothes for the boys, did they shut all the windows?' Shut all the windows? It was December. Never the less, William gave his mother-in-law a quick hug and a kiss on her cheek, expressing how glad he was that they had made it here safely. Charles bounded in next, with a smiling two year old on his shoulders. As soon as Nathan saw his 'Unca Will' he dove right off of Charles' shoulders and into William's free arm. Charles laughed and expressed how happy he was that Jane never saw him do that or she would never let the kids ride up there again.
With two squirming two year olds in his arms, William adjusted them so that he could carry them like luggage into the living room. All the while they laughed and screamed having the time of their life with their 'Unca Will'.
Elizabeth met William in the hallway on his way to the living room. She laughed at the sight of him. When she was a close enough, Connor reached out toward Lizzy who scooped him up and gave him a big kiss. "Where's Caroline? I thought you said she was coming too." He asked as Elizabeth handed Will back the giggling toddler. "Not that I'm complaining, mind you." William flipped Nathan right side up and handed him over as well.
"I think I heard Jane say that she was driving over in her own car and should be here soon." Elizabeth smiled as Nathan wrapped his little arms around Elizabeth's neck. She gave his head a kiss then returned him to William. He nodded.
"Why does she have to come?" Elizabeth could hear the strong whinny tone in his voice.
"She came to stay with Jane and Charles for the wedding. I couldn't just invite the rest the house and leave her at home."
"Yes you could." He muttered. "Why would Kitty invite Caroline to her wedding anyway?"
"I think it was more my mother's idea than hers. Besides, Kitty doesn't see Caroline enough to know that she's a pretentious snob who takes pleasure in ridiculing..."
"Liz!" he interrupted her tirade, laughing, "Little ears, remember."
Elizabeth laughed at his remark. It was as if it were the old times again. Elizabeth almost got caught up in the moment. She turned suddenly serious and mumbled something about checking the dinner. She turned and walked back the way she had come.
He had called her Liz. William usually called her Elizabeth. He only called her Liz when.... Well, suffice it to say, that he had not called her Liz in a while. But he did it now. He was not supposed to do that! And now that he did, what did it mean?
Before Elizabeth reached the kitchen, the doorbell rang. She made a deviation in her path to answer it, knowing who would be on the other side. She plastered a smile on her face and opened the door.
"Eliza! How are you? I do love the sweater. It's so you."
Elizabeth looked down at her clothes. She was wearing heels, long black suit pants and a dark red sweater. She looked back up at Caroline's ensemble. She wore a sleeveless, short black cocktail dress, accented with a strand of large orange beads around her neck and an orange handbag. "Thanks. I like your...dress...too."
Caroline thrust her coat in Elizabeth's face and marched off to where she heard everyone.
Elizabeth looked after her while she hung up her coat. She pitied Jane.
Caroline entered the living room with a flourish. Everyone looked up at her entrance, everyone except William. William was lying on his back on the floor with two two-year-olds climbing over him. The other members of the room turned their attention back to the miniature Olympics in front of them after having seen who it was.
"Charles!" Caroline was aghast. "You will sit here and watch William be attacked on this filthy floor by your two children? They'll ruin his nice clothes!"
"He's fine, Caroline. Sit down and relax. It's Christmas." He brother scooted over on the couch closer to his wife to make room for his sister. Caroline silently stalked over to the seat and sat down.
"Could I get anyone a drink?" Elizabeth poked her head around the corner.
William sat up and deposited the kids in their parent's laps before going to stand next to Elizabeth. The two took drink orders then headed for the kitchen.
"Did you see Caroline? It's like fifteen degrees outside and she comes in practically dressed for summer!" William was still laughing when he finished.
"Yeah."
William looked at her with his brows furrowed. Did she not find it funny? Just two minutes ago the two of them were cracking jokes about Caroline in the hall. What happened?
"Here." She handed him a tray of drinks. "Could you take these in? I'll bring out the rest." William looked back and her for a moment then picked up the tray and walked out toward the living room.
Elizabeth breathed out a sigh of relief when he was gone.
When dinner was ready, the whole party wandered out to the dining room. William took his place at the head of the table. Elizabeth sat at the other end. There were four people seated on either side of the table, two of them needing phone books to sit on.
Dinner progressed well for a time. The table was full of lively conversation. Finally, Caroline, feeling ignored, felt the need to put her two cents in.
"This china pattern is unusual, Eliza. Where ever did you find this?"
Elizabeth looked up from her plate and down to Caroline's. These were her Christmas plates. They each had a small holly leaf painted in the center of the plate and a gold band lined the edge. "I found them in a little shop in Connecticut." Her tone was slightly defensive. She knew where Caroline would be going with this.
"I only mention it because I noticed that this is not the Darcy family china. I'm sure Mrs. Darcy, William's mother, would have been heartbroken to learn that you stuffed her beautiful, precious china into a box somewhere."
"We usually use it. I thought these would be a little more festive and appropriate for the season."
"Oh, well my dear, they are...festive...if that's what you were going for. There's no accounting for a single person's tastes." was Caroline's snide remark.
"I helped her pick them out, Caroline." Georgiana's voice could be heard from across the table. She had a sweet smile playing about her lips. Maybe too sweet. The entire table went silent at Georgie's outburst. Charles was looking at his sister angrily, Nathan and Connor were flying their forks around in the air like planes, Jane was looking down in her lap, Georgie was still smiling, and William was looking at Elizabeth.
"I like them too, Georgie." William's voice was heard from the other side of the table.
Caroline did not say much for the rest of dinner.
Elizabeth looked back at William. He could not detect any emotion in her features. Rather, it seemed as if she were looking at him but thinking of something else.
Connor and Nathan soon began to squirm in their seats, so the group took their coffee into the living room after dessert. Elizabeth picked up Nathan out of his makeshift booster seat and carried him in. Georgie followed with Connor. William and Charles cleared the plates from the table and set them in the kitchen, leaving them to be cleaned later. When the two men made their way to the living room to join their guests, William looked around the room. Jane and Caroline were sitting on the couch conversing with Mrs. Bennet, and Georgie and Conner was playing on the floor while Mr. Bennet looked on in amusement at his grandson's antics. Elizabeth was not in the room. William gave his sister a questioning look. She gestured toward the music room.
William slipped out of the room. He made his way to the music room. From the hall he could see that the lights were off. Silently, he peered in.
Elizabeth was sitting in a chair by the window with a sleeping Nathan in her arms. He was curled up in her embrace, resting his head on her shoulder. Elizabeth was rubbing his back and softly kissing his head. The moonlight through the window was bouncing off her curls, illuminating half of her face in its soft light. She looked so peaceful. So beautiful. She would make a wonderful mother some day.... William silently retreated back to the other guests.
Jane stepped out of the shadows in the hall and watched William as he walked away. She had seen him watching Lizzy with her son. Her sister looked content with Nathan in her arms, but when William turned to go, she saw a look of pain on his face. Maybe Georgie was right. Maybe something had happened to make them sensitive to the subject of children.
Posted on Wednesday, 22 June 2005
As their guests prepared to leave that evening, William and Elizabeth said their goodbyes. Neither was looking forward to being alone in the house together again. Both parties could feel the tension in the air.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Jane." Elizabeth gave Jane a quick kiss on her cheek. "You too, you little night owl." She kissed a wide-awake Connor and the sleeping Nathan.
"Jane, these two are getting bigger every time I see them." William gave Jane a hug. "Charles, what time do you think you'll be here tomorrow?"
"I'll pick you up about eight. Then we'll collect Scott for his bachelor adventure."
"Great. I'll see you then." William gave his friend a hearty handshake.
"Good-bye Charles," Elizabeth gave him a big hug before he followed his wife out to the car.
William, Elizabeth, and Georgie looked around them at their now empty house.
"Why don't we get the dishes done, and then leave the rest for the morning." Said William. "I'm tired." He yawned as he started toward the kitchen grabbing Elizabeth's hand in the process and taking her with him.
Georgie smiled when she saw them go off together hand in hand. Maybe they needed some time alone, to talk. Even she could feel that not all was well, and she had her suspicions as to why. She decided to clean up the living room and dinning room while her brother and sister-in-law, did the dishes, alone.
"Nathan and Connor are so big!" William exclaimed as he and Elizabeth put away the leftover food.
"We haven't seen them for awhile. Babies grow fast." He could tell she was avoiding eye contact with him. He hated this mask of indifference she had been putting up all night. He wanted her to get mad at him, to yell and scream, or tell him that she loved him; anything but this deadly coldness he was receiving.
"So...the dinner was excellent, by the way." He said in an attempt to get her talking.
"Thank you. Mrs. Reynolds did most of it."
Well, that did not work. Finally, William gave up. If she did not want to talk, he would not put the energy in to making her.
"Where are you and Charles taking Scott tomorrow?" Elizabeth's back was toward him as she loading dishes in the dishwasher.
"We're taking him skiing!" William smiled at the idea.
"Skiing?" Elizabeth turned to look at her husband. "You have noticed that there is no snow on the ground, right?"
"There is in Pennsylvania. That's where we're going."
"Does Scott know how to ski?"
"He said he did. We'll see how long it takes him to get off the Bunny slope before we try anything too difficult." William laughed.
"When will you be back?"
"I would say about five or six tomorrow evening. Don't worry Charles and I will stay hidden during the rest of your party. I wouldn't want to deprive you girls of time to discuss Tupperware and dress sizes...kitchen appliances, the top 50 helpful household tips." William ducked as a kitchen towel flew in his direction.
"For your information we don't discuss things as remotely domestic as that at bridal showers. Kitty will probably get tons of lacy lingerie. Our conversation will most likely stay in that general vicinity."
"I'm not sure I want to see what some of your other sister's would consider attractive honeymoon attire. Mary would probably send a flannel one-zee and Lydia would send some sort of stripper outfit that would give your mother a heart attack."
Elizabeth laughed. "Lydia still has all of the clothes she bought last year for her planned nuptials saved just in case. I wonder if she has realized yet that she will never be Mrs. George Wickham while there is a retraining order blocking the way."
William turned away from his wife quickly. "Is she still mad that her elopement was caught in time?"
"I think so. Not as much as she was before. But she still won't talk to my Uncle. The only person she dislikes more than him is you, I think, though I still don't understand why. She used to like you well enough. Jane had to tell her to stop flirting with you that first Christmas you spent with us. Now she hardly ever even acknowledges you." Elizabeth walked back over to the sink.
"That seems to be a Bennet family trait." William mumbled as he put a plate of leftovers in the refrigerator. Unfortunately, he was not quite subtle enough. His wife turned around, stared at her husband for a moment, her eyes burning into his, and fled the room.
William watched her leave. He ran his hands down his face, and sighed. This was going to be a long two weeks if this kept up. He knew that one was his fault. She did not even say anything to set him off. It was just that conversations involving himself, his wife, and Wickham always made him tense. He had tried so hard last year not to let Elizabeth know that he was involved in patching up her sister's mess. He did not want her to worry any more than she had too. Besides, he couldn't let Georgiana find out. She had been through enough with that man. So he made the decision to let the appreciation fall to Elizabeth's uncle Gardiner. Elizabeth knew what kind of man Wickham was first hand, yet she did not know all. She still did not know about that incident with Wickham and his sister so many years ago. It was not his place to tell her. If Georgie wanted her to know, she would know.
William cleaned up the rest of the dishes and promised himself that tomorrow would be better for the two of them. It had to be.
Lizzy woke up early that morning. The clock read six o'clock. She rolled over in the bed to face William. He was still sleeping peacefully on his stomach, his head facing her. She lay there for a moment, gathering the blankets up around her neck to keep out the cold, and just looked at him. He was so handsome. Elizabeth recalled the first time she ever met him. It was four years ago. She was twenty-two. He was twenty-four. She and Jane stilled shared an apartment. Jane and Charles had been seeing each other for about four months. When she and Jane decided to throw a dinner party, Charles asked if he could bring his friend, he wanted Jane to meet him. That night at the party, Elizabeth met her would-be husband for the first time. She could not deny that he was attractive, very attractive. However, from the little he had said to her, she didn't think much of him. In the following months when she and William were thrown into company together, Elizabeth found out that William was not only handsome but very intelligent as well. He and his cousin, Richard Fitzwilliam, owned a law firm. She discovered that he was actually somewhat shy. Every time they met, she learned more about him, and the more she knew, the more she liked him. He opened up with her. She could tell he did not talk that way with most people. Their relationship was different. A year later they were married.
William rolled over in his sleep prompting Elizabeth to come out of her reverie. She crawled out of bed got ready for her day.
About half an hour after she got up, William was rummaging around in the basement, bringing up his skis. He had a bag by the door and was dressed for the day's arctic events. Charles rang the bell at about eight twenty. He was usually always late to events. William had taken this into consideration and was just now going back down for his boots when his friend arrived. "Could you get that?" William's voice rang from the basement. "Tell him I'll be ready in a minute."
Elizabeth let Charles in the house. Talking with her brother-in-law was always something she enjoyed. William came up the stairs. He slung his bag across chest and grabbed his boots and skis. On his way out he bent down to give Elizabeth a kiss on the cheek, whispering in her ear, "I'm sorry about yesterday." As he stood back up, William nodded to Charles that they should go.
As the door shut in front of Elizabeth, she noticed she was smiling.
Tuesday morning was full of cleaning and preparing the house for Kitty's bridal shower. Lizzy had not seen her sister in over a month. Now her little baby sister was getting married. She was so young! She and William had married rather young, maybe that was part of the problem. But, Kitty was younger still. Only twenty-one!
Elizabeth was determined not to let anything ruin Kitty's day. Therefore, she set her mind on her work.
The Bridal shower was wonderful. All the guests were having a wonderful time. Gifts were given, food was eaten, and advice was shared. Kitty, who sat in the middle of the living room surrounded by her family and friends, absorbed every tidbit if knowledge she could.
"Here," Jane stood up and handed Kitty her gift, "open mind next." Jane's gift was beautiful. It was a champagne colored silk negligee.
"Oh Jane, it's beautiful! Thank you!" Kitty stood up to give her sister a hug.
"It felt rather strange buying this for my little sister, but I guess you grew up without my notice. We all wish you two all the happiness you deserve."
"Here, here!" Cried Elizabeth.
"Kitty, mine's the one in the blue wrapping paper." Georgiana pointed to her gift.
Kitty tore the paper off the box and began to lift the lid. Before she could open it all the way, she shut it quickly. He face turned bright red and her eyes shot open as wide as they could. She turned to face her friend who smiled back innocently. Maybe a little impishly. "Well, dear. What's in the box? Take it out and show us." Mrs. Bennet exclaimed.
Kitty turned to face Lizzy for help. Elizabeth was laughing so hard tears were streaming down her face. "Georgiana Darcy! This is one of those times that if your brother knew what his innocent little sister were really like, you would never be allowed to marry." Elizabeth wiped her face with her hand.
"Will always thinks of me as twelve years old, and he always will. And besides, I've known you to shop at this very store."
Caroline raised an eyebrow.
William cleared his throat from the doorway. Every one turned to see him and Charles standing there red faced. Charles was trying to suppress a grin. While William was glaring at his sister, his eyes wide open. Elizabeth started laughing again. As he walked through the room, she could hear him mutter, "I knew I shouldn't have come in through the front door. There are some things I just don't want to know. Georgie is never getting married."
After the men had left the room, Georgiana and Elizabeth burst out laughing again.
After most of the guests had left the party, Elizabeth, Jane and Georgiana were cleaning up the last bits of food. When all of it was done, Jane and Georgie went to play with the boys in the family room. Elizabeth told them to go on ahead, she would be there in a minute. As she came back down carrying a basket of laundry, she ran into Caroline in the hallway.
"Caroline, I thought you had left."
"I did. I realized I had left my scarf and came back for it."
"Oh, well, it should be around here somewhere. When I'm finished with this I'll help you look for it." Elizabeth walked on past her.
"I see you have been demoted. Back in your element, I gather." Caroline called from behind her. Slowly Elizabeth turned to face her.
Before she could speak, Caroline quickly turned away and left her standing there in the hallway. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and turned back toward the laundry room. Standing directly in front of her was William, with an incredulous expression on his face, staring over her shoulder in the direction Caroline had just left.
"Are you just going to let her talk to you that way in your own house?! I can't believe she said that!"
"William, she always says things like that." He turned to stare in her face again.
"What! Why didn't you tell me?"
"William, this has been going on for years, before we even married. You never knew until now?"
"I knew she didn't like you, but I never knew she would abuse you to your face! She is never welcome in this house again!"
"She'll be here for Christmas, William. She is staying with Charles. There is not much we can do about it. Don't worry, I'm used to it. After today I'm sure she won't say anything that bad. She knows you're on to her now." Elizabeth smiled and winked at him, still standing there with disbelief mixed with anger on his face, as she brushed by him.
Elizabeth woke up Wednesday morning feeling refreshed and rested. She did not have to host any more social functions at her house until Friday. A two-day break.
William was already up. Elizabeth put on her slippers and wandered downstairs. Georgie was sitting at the kitchen table taking to herself while munching on a bowl of grapes. That poor girl needs more friends. Or so Elizabeth thought until William popped his head up from behind the counter to give a reply. When he saw Elizabeth there as well he asked, "Honey, where is that new skillet that we bought? The one we got with your sister in Virginia?"
"It should be in cabinet to the left..." Elizabeth froze. She knew where it was.
"To the left of what?" he asked.
Elizabeth stared at him for a moment, pleading with her eyes for him to drop the subject. William took the hint, although he did not understand what she meant, and quickly changed the subject to Georgie's roommate search. Elizabeth quietly slipped out of the room.
"That was strange." Said Georgie as soon as Elizabeth had left. William nodded and silently followed his wife.
He found her talking to Mrs. Reynolds, who had just arrived, in the foyer. William quietly stepped up next to her and waited for her to finish her conversation. As soon as she was done talking, William gave his housekeeper a peck on the cheek before she left. When the two of them were alone, he asked, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
William took hold of her hand as she tried to walk away. "Where is the skillet? Why were you acting so strange in the kitchen just now?"
Elizabeth took a deep breath. "I left it at Charlotte's by accident."
"You took our dishware? Doesn't Charlotte have her own pots and pans?" The corners of William's mouth were struggling not to smile.
"Well, it was new and I have a special fondness for that particular pan. I thought it would be very convenient to have with me." Even Elizabeth could hear the lameness of her answer.
"Well, are there any other appliances I should be on the look out for? Missing dishwashers, vacuums, toilet paper? You know, I noticed we were low on toilet paper yesterday. I thought we had a thief in our midst. I was very nearly offering a very large reward." Elizabeth laughed at his outburst and rolled her eyes at his antics.
"Darn! I had hoped you hadn't noticed." She exclaimed with mock seriousness.
Laughing, William turned back toward the kitchen saying, "Oh, don't let your guard down. I'm on to you."
William threw one more look over his shoulder at his wife before entering the library. As he did, he noticed that he could see nothing out the window. Upon closer inspection, he realized that that nothing he saw, was snow. William raced to the window. In the distance he could see the outlines of several trees, but not much more. The snow was coming down in a thick blanket, covering all that it touched. It was beautiful.
"Elizabeth!"
William stood by the window, staring out into the yard as he waited for his wife to come. "Elizabeth!" he hollered again.
Elizabeth tripped in through the library door in a state. "What? What happened? What's wrong?" She was still wearing her pajamas, which were slightly askew from her hurry to locate her husband and discover the problem. William glanced over his shoulder at her awkward entrance. He furrowed his brow in confusion.
"Nothing is wrong. I just wanted to get your attention."
Elizabeth let out a large breath she had not realized she had been holing in. "Don't do that!" She leaned her wait against the doorframe, clutching her hand to her heart. "I thought you had died or something!"
William gave a sheepish smile. "No."
"Well what is it that you so desperately wanted to tell me?"
"Come and see!" William stepped toward his wife, grabbing her hand to pull her back toward the window. "Snow." he said with a smile.
Elizabeth began jumping up and down, smiling. William laughed; she still loved snow. So did he, but for a very different reason.
She threw her hands up over her head and began to twirl around all over the room chanting, "It's snowing!" She finally twirled out the door to find Georgie and tell her the good news. William followed at a more sedate pace, laughing all the while.
When Georgie heard the news, she clasped hands with her sister and twirled around the room with her, smiling and chanting.
This was why he loved Elizabeth.
Posted on Thursday, 7 July 2005
The Snow continued to fall heavily for the rest of the day. The church called and cancelled the choir rehearsal. That was fine; Elizabeth and Georgie already knew all the music. It looked like they were in for a bone-a-fide snow day.
As William came downstairs, he saw Elizabeth and Georgie sitting on the floor in the foyer tugging on snow boots.
"Are you coming?" Georgie asked him when she saw him watching.
"Do you want me too?" he asked.
"Of course we do! Who would carry the sled up the hill again?" she teased.
William looked to Elizabeth who was occupied with lacing up her boot. He was about to decline when she looked up at him with a smile. Whether she was aware of it or not, William took it as a good sign.
"I'll meet you out there."
I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
William ran up stairs to find his own boots. Smiling ear to ear, he dressed to join his family outside in the snow. He loved these days. The always stiff and proper Mr. Darcy, who carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, melted away and he could be a boy again, with no cares in the world.
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true...
All I want for Christmas is
You
This day had gone well, they felt like a family again. He and Elizabeth did still have a lot to talk out and work through, but this was a good beginning.
I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
Don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
William hurried downstairs to join his wife and sister. It was on days like this that he was almost sure Elizabeth had married him solely because he took her sledding on one of their first dates. This was before he had learned about her abnormal enthusiasm for snow.
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you...
You baby
He sat down on the steps in order to pull on his boots. He wanted to get outside as quickly as possible, to start his new life with his wife. Everything would be different now. He would come home earlier; he would call when he was going to be late.
Oh I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeer click
'Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight
What more can I do
Baby all I want for Christmas is you
You baby
He just needed a chance. He would take her out to dinner, just the two of them. All they needed was some time alone to talk through things. Everything would be fine, he was sure of it.
All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need -
won't you please bring my baby to me...
It was probably just a phase she was going through. Maybe she needed a little space. He could give her that. William opened the door to brace the cold with his family. It was a gorgeous day.
Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just want to see baby
Standing right outside my door
Oh I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is
You baby
All I want for Christmas is...
William stopped is his tracks. Standing outside of his house, bundled up until they looked like snowmen themselves, with flushed cheeks and red noses, were his family. Bright smiles on all three of their faces. However, they weren't looking and smiling at him. They were talking to a man standing by a large green SUV. William did not know him, but Elizabeth definitely did. When he was close enough, he could catch part of their conversation.
"...I know, but I told the boss man that if he couldn't handle it, he could deal with it himself." Elizabeth and Georgiana laughed at this man's words. He continued to talk. "I called Charlotte and she told me you would be here. I thought I would drop by on my way to work so you didn't have to come in today." Georgiana looked at the man questioningly. Elizabeth desperately tried to change the subject.
"What papers did you need to bring me?"
Georgiana broke in saying that she would be right back; she needed to put on a different pair of gloves. When she had tramped away through the snow, the man continued.
"Oh, yes. Here they are." The man handed Elizabeth a folder of papers. "All the stuff for next week is in there. It's all fairly self-explanatory. If you have any questions just call."
"Thanks, I'll do that."
William, at that moment stepped up beside Elizabeth, making her jump in surprise.
"William!"
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." He kept his gaze on the tall man in front of him. Close up, he could see that the man was younger than he was, by a few years, with sandy blonde hair that had a sort of 'purposely disheveled' look to it. It bothered him.
"Chris," Elizabeth began, "... this is William...my husband. Will, this Chris Parker, he works for the Washington Times."
William extended his hand. "How do you do?"
"It's nice to meet you," said Chris slowly, realization dawning, "I didn't realize Liz was...married." Chris shifted nervously.
William bristled at the sound of 'Liz' on this stranger's lips. "Yes, going on four years soon." William placed an arm around Elizabeth's shoulder, grasping her tightly. He offered a smile to the man that only she could tell was forced.
An awkward silence consumed the group. Elizabeth felt ashamed all of the sudden. She lowered her head, not daring to look William in the eye.
"That's great!" Chris exclaimed weakly. "Um...I've got to get going. It was nice meeting you William. Merry Christmas. I'll see you at work...Elizabeth." Chris climbed into his car and drove off.
William and Elizabeth stood by the driveway watching the car leave, neither moving from where they stood. Finally, William spoke.
"You know, that wasn't very nice of you. To let him find out you were married that way." His tone was harsh and quiet. He still looked straight ahead.
"I know." Her voice was quiet. Elizabeth could tell that he was angry. Not just for the way she handled that situation, but for the fact that she had not told Chris about him.
William was stunned. He could not believe she had not told someone that she was married. Or maybe she had denied the fact, outright! He knew that the two of them had issues to work through, but he never knew that Elizabeth's dislike of him was so great that she would not recognize him as her husband.
"He's just a friend from work." She spoke up softly. She still did not dare look at him. She did not want to see the disappointment in his eyes. "I didn't think..."
"You didn't tell him." William pulled his arm off Elizabeth. "I'm going out, I'll be back later." He got in his truck and drove off.
Elizabeth watched him drive off, wanting to dissolve into a puddle and cry.
Love can be a many splendored thing
Can't deny the joy it brings
A dozen roses, diamond rings
Dreams for sale and fairy tales
It'll make you hear a symphony
And you just want the world to see
But like a drug that makes you blind,
It'll fool ya every time
Elizabeth trudged inside, up to her bedroom and sat on William's side of the bed, numb. Tears were dripping down her face but she did not seem to notice. She had been so wrong. She had hurt both William and Chris in one shot. And she had not meant to hurt anyone. But she did.
The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn't care how fast you fall
And you can't refuse the call
See, you got no say at all
She curled up into a ball and wept. Wept for her own situation, William's, and how bleak her future looked at the moment. This was how Jane found her when she arrived a few hours later. Georgiana let her in and quickly told her that Elizabeth had been crying all afternoon. She did not know what was wrong, could not get her to talk, and William's car was gone. All of this pummeled forward in one breath. Georgie let the sisters sit alone while she kept Nathan and Connor occupied.
Every time I turn around
I think I've got it all figured out
My heart keeps callin' and I keep on fallin'
Over and over again
The sad story always ends the same
Me standin' in the pourin' rain
It seems no matter what I do
It tears my heart in two
Jane let Elizabeth cry in her arms as she had done when they were both little girls. Once she had sufficiently calmed down, the whole story poured out, separation and all. To say that Jane was surprised was an understatement. She had never imagined something like this happening to her sister and William. Jane listened patiently until the whole story was over, ending with Elizabeth crying on the bed and William nowhere to be found.
The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride...
While Elizabeth was collecting herself in the bathroom, Jane's phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Darling, it's me."
"Charles, this isn't really a good time. Elizabeth is kind of upset at the moment and I need to go talk to her. Can I call you back?"
"That's what I called about. Will is on his way home. He was here. We had a talk and I sent him back."
"William was at our house?" Jane glanced toward the bathroom door.
"Yeah, he's not doing so great either. Once he gets there, you should probably come on back. They need to talk. They need some time to work this out...alone."
"Okay, I'll be back in a few minutes...Charles, did you ever think something like this could happen to them?"
"No, but I suppose it can happen to anyone."
"I'm just glad it hasn't happened to us."
"Me too. Let's hope they can work this out."
"I'll see you at home, love. Bye."
"Love you, Bye." Jane put her phone back in her purse as Elizabeth came out of the bathroom.
"So I guess Georgie's baby theory wasn't quite accurate, huh?" teased Jane.
Elizabeth laughed slightly. "She's been excited about the idea of being an Aunt since we got engaged. Maybe we should just let her keep thinking that." Elizabeth and Jane sat back down on the bed again.
"Lizzy. Charles called. He said William is on his way home."
"What?"
"Will was at our house apparently. He talked to Charles and he is now on his way home."
"Oh, ...so he told Charles? Jane, you won't tell anyone, will you? I don't want anyone else to know. This is Kitty's time."
"Of course I won't if you don't want me too."
"Thanks. And thanks for letting me cry on your shoulder. You always know how to be the big sister."
"Anytime."
William pulled up into the driveway to find Jane's car there too. Well, he would have to put on his besotted husband act. He was not ready to do that just yet. He had driven away from his home because he needed to think. Not because he had wanted to be away from Elizabeth, he just needed time to cool down. He drove to the end of the street and stopped, not knowing where to go. He, at first, was resolved to turn around and go back, the image of Liz standing in the yard nearly in tears was still replaying in his mind. But he knew that would accomplish nothing. Charles. He would talk to Charles. His best friend...other than Elizabeth.
His talk with Charles had helped. William had ranted and yelled at first, but then began to see things in a more rational light. Charles had been shocked, but capable of clear thought. After the two of them had had some time to talk, Charles had sent William home. He watched William drive away before he called Jane, telling her that she should come home. Charles was scared. If this could happen to Will and Lizzy, could it happen to him and Jane? Well, he was certainly not going to let that come to pass if he could help it.
William got out of his car, walking past Jane's. What would he say? He probably should have thought that through before he got here, but he had not idea as to how Elizabeth was feeling at the moment. He would just have to take it one step at a time.
William walked in the house through the kitchen entrance and found Mrs. Reynolds boiling something on the stove and Georgie sitting at the kitchen table with Nathan and Connor eating Gold Fish. She looked up when he came through the door.
"Will! Where have you been? Elizabeth is so upset and she won't tell me anything. I don't know what's wrong with her! She came in from outside sobbing! Jane is with her now and she has stopped crying. Will, go to her. She needs you."
Well, if that wasn't the overstatement of the year.
William tried to act surprised. "Where is she?" He glanced at the old lady in the corner, whose only reaction was a raise of an eyebrow and shake of her head.
"In your room." Georgie replied.
"Thanks." He muttered, as he walked out of the kitchen and away from the scrutinizing glances of his beloved housekeeper.
As he approached the door, William could hear voices from within. He stopped when he heard his name.
"Jane, I don't know if William and I can fix this. We've let things progress for far too long. I don't think he even really realizes what the problem is."
"What is the real problem? Maybe if you tell me, it will be easier for you to talk to him."
"We started growing apart when he began working all those long hours last year. He started coming home late from work. He was never here. We never talked any more. So I finally decided that if he could be insensitive, so could I. I would make him see what it felt like. But it backfired. We saw even less of each other than before. When he did make time for us, I threw it back in his face. I knew it was a stupid plan to begin with, but I was angry. I was mad that he could make me angry, too!"
"What did you do about it?"
"I left. Everything began to crumble down around me. I couldn't stay to talk to him. We would both start yelling. Trust me Jane, Will and I never have nice and orderly fights. They're messy and mean and someone always ends up hurt whether it was intended or not."
"But would leaving really solve the problem? Arguing would at least get you taking to one another."
"Don't you see? I didn't want to talk to him about it. I wanted him to see what it felt like to be alone."
"That's rather petty."
"Jane! I can't believe you're not sticking by me on this. I know what I did was not the best way to go about it, but I still need your support on this. William has Charles and Georgiana to turn to! He's had them for support much longer than he ever known me. All I have is you." William leaned his head back against the wall in the hall and continued listening. This was torturing him.
"Lizzy. You have Will, too," said Jane, "And Georgiana and Charles. We are all here for you. For both of you."
Elizabeth laid back against the pillows, still crying. "I just feel like I was dropped into this world of his, with his sister and Mrs. Reynolds. And when Will ceased to be here, I felt like a stranger. We got married so young, Jane. I didn't know how to be a wife anymore than Will knew how to be a husband. And then I was given a sort of mothering role to Georgiana and I couldn't do it without Will's help."
"Did you tell him all this?"
"No. I wanted him to be proud of me," she spoke softly, "I wanted to show him I could do it on my own."
"So first you didn't talk to him of your fears because you wanted him to be proud of you, then when you realized you couldn't do it all on your own, you blamed him? Lizzy, that's not like you. It's not right."
"Jane! It wasn't like that! You don't understand. He was here in the beginning. I could turn to him if I needed to. But, when I actually did need his help, I couldn't rely on him."
"Lizzy, he was only at work. You could have called him..."
"Oh, and told his secretary what? That his wife wanted to speak with him! That message never seemed to get through! No wonder he never came home! He had several secretaries available to help him forget his family!" Elizabeth spat.
"Now, you know that's not true!" William rounded the corner and strode into the room. He could not take it anymore. He had to say something. "Yes, I did work late hours this past year, and yes, it would be difficult to be dropped into someone else's life without them here to help, but you know that what you just said and what it implied was a blatant lie! Never once was I unfaithful to you and our marriage and you know it! Now don't start creating more faults for me to ease your conscience!"
Jane tried to slip out of the room once William arrived. She wanted them to have some time together to work through all this. As she was attempting to leave, William stopped her. He turned to her, said quietly, but sincerely, "Thank you." Jane smiled back at him and left the room to gather her boys and go back home to her husband. Once she was gone, the room became deathly silent.
Elizabeth turned on the bed to face the window, her face streaming with tears. It was all William could do not to gather her in his arms and kiss all those tears away. However, he knew that would not help anything, so he stayed exactly where he was.
"Elizabeth, why didn't you tell me all this?"
"Would it have mattered?"
William stood still and looked at this woman crying on the bed. Could she really not know? "Elizabeth," William sat down on the bed facing her with her hands clasped in his, "everything about you matters to me. I love you. All this- everything- is not going to change that."
"William, I'm not saying that we don't love each other. That seems to be about the only thing we have left, it's just-"
"Well what else could we need then?"
"We can't just ignore everything. No problem was ever fixed and a declaration of love is not going to fix all our problems and make them disappear."
"Your right, I'm sorry. I should have called and told you I would be working late. That was insensitive of me. I'm sure you had other things to do."
Elizabeth stared at him, her eyes wide. Did he really not see? It was not the lack of phone calls that had made her leave. It was a lack of companionship. Elizabeth stood, ready to leave and not wanting to cry in front of him again. "Yes...well, I'm sure I did too." She fled the room leaving a very confused and frustrated William in her wake.
Posted on Sunday, 17 July 2005
By Thursday morning, the snow had ceased. The roads were fairly clear which gave Elizabeth a very good excuse to get out of the house. She left for work before William was even out of the shower. They had avoided each other the rest of the day after yesterday's catastrophe. By morning things had cooled off somewhat but tension was still high.
William wandered into the kitchen after his shower to find Elizabeth gone for the day, Georgie out with Kitty, and Mrs. R a willing listener.
"Mrs. R." William took a seat on a stool on the other side of the counter, watching as the old lady polished a silver platter. "You have been disturbingly quiet during this whole affair. And I know you have something to say, don't deny it, I can see it in your eyes."
Mrs. Reynolds looked her employer squarely in the eyes. Finally, she raised one eyebrow and spoke slowly. "Sir, it is not my place to say."
"In other words I won't like what you have to say very much. Come now Mrs. R. You may have known me since I was four, but that doesn't mean that you still need to sensor what you say around me. I'm a grown man. I can handle it." William leaned forward on the counter with his arms crossed in from of him.
"If you are a grown man, William, then act like one."
"Pardon?"
"William, can't you see how unhappy she is? Elizabeth wants to share a life with you, not take whatever is leftover from yours."
William looked at her for a long moment before finding his voice. "But how could I have known she was so miserable. She went to great pains to hide the fact from me!" he spat bitterly.
"I know, neither of you are blameless. It was little things, subtle things that I may have picked up on more than you."
"What do you mean? Why you?"
"I was here with her during the day. I could see the change in her once you started to ignore her."
"Ignore her! I never..."
Mrs. Reynolds put up her hand to silence him. "William just because you were trying to find Lydia does not mean that you can forget her sister."
"I was doing this for her! I would hardly call that ignoring her! If we were to make any headway on that case, I had to give it my all! It's not something that I could leave for others to take care of. If I was there, I couldn't be here. It's as simple as that. I am only one person."
"William," the old lady said as she walked around the counter to where William was sitting and took his hands in hers, "you are married now. She is part of you too."
William looked down at their connected joined hands. This lady had been a mother to him and Georgiana; and had embraced Elizabeth with open arms when she joined the family. He knew she was right. "What should I do?"
"Trust her. Tell her." William looked up at his beloved housekeeper. "She is your wife William. There is no reason you need to hide this from her."
William stood up and hugged the old lady. "What would I do without you Mrs. R. I love you, you know that right?"
"I do. You have turned out to be a fine man, William. Your parents would be proud. I love you too. But I really think you should be telling someone else that about now." Mrs. Reynolds responded with a twinkle in her eye.
William laughed, "I get the picture Mrs. R. You don't need to tell me twice."
Ring...Ring!
"I'll get it. Thank you Mrs. R." William picked up the phone. "Hello?"
"William! It's Edward. How are you?"
"Hello Mr. Gardiner. I am doing well, and you?"
"Fine, fine. Nothing to complain about here. Maddie is doing well too. Kitty is still a little nervous about the big day, but nothing so bad as she would have been with Fanny hovering about all the time. My sister means well but sometimes I question whether we are really related." He laughed.
"I'm glad she was able to pull this off in such a short amount of time. When Elizabeth and I got married I thought the process would never end."
"How is my little Lizard, by the way?" inquired Mr. Gardiner.
"Oh, she's doing...well. She is out at the moment. Should I have her call you when she gets home?"
"Oh, if you like. I wouldn't mind talking to my little girl. But, I really called to talk to you, William."
"How can I help you?"
Mr. Gardiner's tone changed in an instant. "I thought I should give you an update on Wickham. His restraining order is up."
"Do you think he will try anything?"
"No, at least not with Lydia. He is too smart to try the same thing twice; at least now that he knows we are up on him."
"Good." William had had about as much as he could take from that man. As soon as he had heard the news about Lydia it seemed all he could think about was what he should have done to protect his sister. That was what led him on. He knew that he could not sit idly by and watch as Wickham made a mess of some other young girl's life. He would forever see etched in his mind the picture of his sister, at eighteen, struggling to get free of his grasp. Wickham, being a long-time family friend, had managed to gain admittance into the house through Georgiana, who had always had something of a celebrity crush on him. Mrs. Reynolds had gone for the day. William was so glad that he had gotten home when he did. It scared him to think what might have happened had he not returned in time.
With Lydia, it had been different. He had known about the relationship in advance but was powerless to do anything about it for fear that Georgiana would be exposed. But once Wickham made his move, an attempt to 'elope' with Elizabeth's young sister, William knew that he had to step in. Therefore, with the help of Mr. Gardiner, he had found Wickham, brought Lydia home, swore her to secrecy, and had a restraining order placed on George so he could do no more damage than he had already done.
"William? Are you still there?"
"What? Oh, yes, I'm still here. Was that all?"
"Yes. That's the latest development on Wickham. I'll call you if I hear anything more. Mum's-the-word still, eh?"
William chuckled, "I'm afraid so, sir."
"Alright. I'll see you later, William. Give a kiss to Lizzy for me. Good-bye."
"Good-bye." William hung up the phone and went to do some work until Elizabeth came home."
William lounged around the house following his phone call from Edward Gardiner. He was feeling rather restless. Bored even. He had just spent two months without the company of his wife; one would think he would be able to survive a day. Even so, he missed having her around. Her presence was soothing to him. It gave him a small degree of hope to know she was wandering around the halls or puttering away in some part of the house. Hope that had felt like despair for so long. Oh, he wished she would just come home from wherever she was, if only to restore a sense of comfort to him. It made him uneasy to think of her about town, only hoping that she would come back.
At length Elizabeth did return home, with several bags on her arms. It was evening by then.
"Hi." She greeted him as she set her bags down on the floor.
"Hey. Did you get the rest of your shopping done?" he asked as he began to peak in the bags.
Elizabeth reached down and snatched up her bags. "No peaking! Yes, I got the rest of my shopping done." With that, she turned and left the room.
William smiled as she left.
"Hey Will?" Georgiana entered the kitchen.
"Yes, Georgie?"
"Will, is everything alright with you and Lizzy?"
William looked at his sister for a long moment. Did she suspect anything? How did she know? He carefully considered his answers.
"Of course. Why do you ask?" He said with a nervous laugh.
"Oh, I don't know. Lizzy has just been acting funny for the last few days. And then, yesterday she was crying. I just wanted to make sure everything was well between you two."
"Don't worry munchkin, everything is fine." William hoped he could believe it himself.
As William climbed into bed that night, he paused to think. Tomorrow was Christmas Eve. This holiday always brought about mixed feelings for him. It had been on that day six years ago that his parents passed away in a train accident, leaving behind a twenty two year old son still in law school, and a fifteen year old daughter in her freshman year of high school. The news had devastated them both. Their father had been called away to speak at a conference in Chicago several days before. Their mother had gone along with him, leaving Georgiana in William's care. The two siblings made a large dinner to welcome their parents' home and to celebrate Christmas, but a train crash prevented them from coming. That day would forever live in William's memory. With time, the pain became less and less acute.
Then, two years later, William met Elizabeth. She showed him what it was to live again. Despite his circumstances, he was even able to enjoy Christmas, as long as she was there. As the years wore on, and they eventually married, William learned to grieve and rejoice at the same time. It was what his parents would have wanted of his life. And he had it all. He had it all.
Elizabeth woke up to the sound of someone mumbling and moaning. At first she thought it might have been a dream, but then she heard it again. Elizabeth awakened groggily to decipher where the origin of the sound was coming from. She turned on her side. It was William. He was thrashing from side to side in the bed.
"Elizabeth!" he finally screamed. "Elizabeth!"
She knew that sound. William was having a nightmare. He had them every year at this time. It was the anniversary of his parent's death that ignited them. Elizabeth moved toward him and placed both of her hands on either side of his shoulders.
"Will, wake up!" she shook him. "Will, it's okay, it's only a dream!"
"Elizabeth! Stop!" William was still dreaming.
"Will, I'm here! It will be alright! I'm right here."
William's eyes popped open. He was panting heavily. He gathered Elizabeth's form to his chest and held her tight, tears streaming down his face. Elizabeth relaxed her head against his chest and whispered soothing words to him while he calmed down.
"You were there. In my dream." he mumbled, never loosening his hold on her. "You got on the train, too. I tried to stop you but you couldn't hear me. You were on the train with my parents." he cried in her hair.
"I'm here, Will. It was just a dream."
"Don't ever leave me, Liz! Please!"
"I'm right here, Will. I'm not going anywhere."
Soon both parties fell back asleep in each other's arms. William had no more nightmares that night.
Friday morning was full of preparations for that evening's festivities. William and Georgiana were a little more subdued that usual, but everyone knew to give them their space. At about five o'clock, the Darcy family returned home from the Christmas Eve service at church. Final touches for dinner were prepared, last minute decorations were hung, and phone calls from Elizabeth's mother, making sure there would be enough green bean casserole, were received.
The events of last night had affected both of them. As the week wore on it was getting harder and harder to pretend indifference. They had both come to a realization last night. It was not something that could be put into words precisely, but rather a feeling of comfort and dependency.