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Chapter Eleven

Posted on Sunday, 27 November 2005

There was a comfortable silence in the car. Will was happy in the knowledge that the woman he loved occupied the seat beside him. Elizabeth, enjoying the sunshine and the view, was no less aware of the presence of the man responsible for her own feelings, as muddled as they were. It wasn’t difficult to shift her gaze from the passing trees and houses to focus on Will’s steady profile, to admire the strength in the line of his jaw and the way his attention rarely wavered from the task of driving, only occasionally looking her way.

She inhaled deeply, eyes closed, feeling every sensation that surrounded her; the bounce of the tires over the road’s surface, the gentle curving as the car switched lanes, the brief change in acceleration when Will shifted gears. All of it was new and exhilarating; she wanted to experience more.

His voice broke into her thoughts. “Do you have any preferences for our drive? Is there anyplace special you would like to see?”

Her impulse was to say that anywhere would be special as long as he was with her but realised his intent was to please by letting her choose. Elizabeth considered the surrounding landscape and then simply pointed straight ahead to the escarpment that rose above the city.

Will nodded, perfectly comprehending her request. “It should be spectacular now with the colours spread out below.” His voice dropped to a whisper, adding, “But not as pretty as the way your eyes light up just thinking about it.”

Her smile spread to those eyes and, softly, Elizabeth placed her hand over the one Will rested on the stick shift. He looked at her in mild surprise, then smiled and opened his hand so that she could slip her fingers through his. She felt her insides tremble and knew contentment.

Today it doesn’t matter how hard it is to walk or that I can’t voice my thoughts aloud. I’m alive and Will loves me. He still loves me.

As she silently considered her next move they arrived at the park overlooking the city. Ignoring Jane’s admonishments to not leave the car, Will helped Elizabeth step out onto the pavement and they set off down the path at a slow pace. The air was crisp and smelled of autumn. Elizabeth’s eyes darted back and forth, taking in as much as she could see. The trees were in full colour; reds, oranges and yellows. Squirrels busily gathered fallen nuts to bury them in secret places. All too soon she was tired, though, the sight of a bench very welcome as Will took them in that direction. Seeing Elizabeth settled, he sat down beside her and she snuggled close.

“I used to see you here almost every day,” he quietly said She looked up at him, surprised by this confession. His gaze was trained on the trees across the open space in front of them. “I was in love with you before I knew it... and before I knew you.”

She searched her own memories for his presence during her forays in the park but it all seemed so long ago, too distant to recall with any clarity. What she did remember was more disturbing than comforting. Elizabeth doubted she would enjoy the environment in the same way again. There would be no more tree climbing, no more running on the pathways.

“I couldn’t help myself,” continued Will. “I returned day after day to see you, like a breath of fresh air in my stale existence.”

Courage drained from Elizabeth’s limbs. She knew that she would never be that woman again, not even for this man. The world around her seem to grow dark, the weight of truth bearing down on her. She closed her eyes, her head spinning.

“Let me be that breath of fresh air for you, Elizabeth.”

Blinking away the dizziness, she tried to focus on his face. Had he really spoken? Suddenly shy, confused by her own reaction, she looked away. Will said nothing, nor did he move to put distance between them and for that she was grateful. She felt awkward, like a teenager on a first date wondering what to do next. The warmth of his hand seeped into hers and Elizabeth shuddered as a chill swept through her body.

“You’re cold,” said Will, quickly rising from the bench and shocking her by picking her up in his arms. “I should have listened to Jane. I’m so sorry, Lizzy. It was stupid of me to put you at risk like this.”

Before she knew it they were at the car, Elizabeth’s light form allowing Will to carry her effortlessly. Almost anxiously, he opened the passenger door and deposited her in the seat, then pulled a blanket from the back and tucked it around her. Elizabeth was just recovering her wits when he had started up the engine and turned on the heater. She frowned slightly in his direction.

“I’d better get you home.” He did not seem to need her opinion on the matter.

Her frown deepened but words wouldn’t come. I don’t want to go home. I’m not cold, she silently protested.

“I’m sure Jane has lunch ready by now, anyway.” Will put the car into gear and began to back it out of the parking space. “Are you hungry?” he asked, glancing at her.

Elizabeth shrugged her shoulders. She had lost her appetite along with her patience. Yet, as they made their way back down into the city, the man beside her did not acknowledge her growing dissatisfaction. She crossed her arms over her chest, turning away from him and staring out the window.

Their return trip was as silent as the first. When they pulled in the driveway Charles and Jane were out front, making some pretense of yard work. Jane started toward the car but her husband stopped her with a touch on her arm. Will called a greeting as he went around to Elizabeth’s side and helped her out.

“Did you enjoy your outing?” Jane asked when her sister was close enough. She thought Elizabeth looked tired despite the smile she gave in reply. “Let’s go in now, Charles. We can eat and then Lizzy can have a nap afterward. I think she overdid it today.”

Charles raised an eyebrow in his friend’s direction, knowing Will had overheard the comment. Judging from the expression on Elizabeth’s face, she had also heard it and was not pleased, but whether it was with Jane or with Will he could not determine. To relieve some of the awkwardness of the moment, Charles offered his arm to Elizabeth, giving her a respite from the two most attentive parties. With a meaningful look at his friend, he sent Will off ahead of them.

“Don’t allow either of them to smother you, Lizzy. Will’s a man who has always been in control of everything around him and he likes it that way. I can have a word with him if you want,” whispered Charles. Elizabeth giggled. “That’s what brothers are for, you know.”

She shook her head, grinning. “No.”

“I can’t say the same about Jane, though.” Charles winked at her. “However, if it suits you, I could arrange to take her out one evening and someone else stay with you for a few hours.” He searched her expression for an indication of the direction her thoughts were taking.

Elizabeth gently bit her bottom lip, then looked up at Charles hopefully. “Will?”

“That is up to you. I’ll make the arrangements if you like?” There was no mistaking the answer in her eyes. He grinned.

They had reached the front door and Elizabeth felt the fatigue she’d prefer to deny. Charles saw her stationed comfortably in the big armchair near the window, removed her shoes and asked if she would like anything else before he assisted Jane in the kitchen. As he was leaving, Will appeared in the doorway, hesitating before he spoke.

“Are you warm enough? I’ll get you a blanket.” He made as if to retrieve one but Elizabeth stopped him with an impatient sigh. Will returned to her side. “What is it? Have I....?” He paused before beginning again in a quieter voice. “Would you prefer that I go?”

That was the last thing she wanted and Elizabeth struggled to form the words he needed to hear. Slowly, the sounds were drawn out, whispered softly against his hand as she brought it to her lips. “K-kiss me.”

He stared at her, startled by both the words and that she had spoken.

“Kiss me,” she ordered, her gaze now strong upon him, waiting. Will crouched down beside the chair, bringing his face level with hers. Elizabeth was pleased that he didn’t need to be asked a third time but the modest brush of his lips against her cheek was not what she had intended. “Tease,” she scolded.

Will’s laugh was full and rich. “Don’t be in such a rush, young lady! We have the rest of our lives ahead of us.” He leaned closer, his breath caressing her ear. “I’ve waited months already. A little bit longer won’t make any difference.” She heard him inhale deeply. “Your voice is beautiful, too, just as I knew it would be.”

She grasped his hand more tightly, no longer feeling disappointed that their excursion had been curtailed. If the day could end on a more positive note then any misunderstandings would be easily forgotten. Elizabeth knew that her afternoon would be spent having a nap. Her body was not ready to perform the work she was demanding of it and she felt more tired than she had anticipated. Yet the thought of Will not being there when she woke up was disconcerting despite the ridiculousness of expecting him to stay while she slept for hours. Surely the man would have plenty of other things he could be doing in that time!

“Come, let’s join Charles and Jane now.”

Elizabeth gladly placed her other hand into his strong grasp and together they went to enjoy the meal her sister had prepared.

Charles pulled his wife back to the kitchen, entreating her to say nothing. As soon as the door closed behind him she asked, “What was all that about?”

“Jane, I told you if we left them to sort it out between them everything will turn out fine. Trust me.”

“Fine, Charles, but just tell me what you saw.”

He grinned. “Two people who have almost realised how much they are in love.”

Jane’s hands fell from her hips. “How long do you propose we hide in here, then?”

“Oh, it’s not a question of staying in here because they will be with us any minute.” He laughed at Jane’s roll of eyes. “I couldn’t be happier for them and I know you won’t be able to deny it, either, once you see how enthusiastic they both are.”

Jane prayed he was right for it was too late to protect her sister from heartbreak. She could only offer comfort if and when Elizabeth needed it. The sight that greeted her when the other couple entered the kitchen inspired a little more confidence; Elizabeth’s face was glowing, not with the florid colour of agitation but with a delicate hue denoting pleasure and satisfaction. When they were all seated at the table she leaned against Will and his fingers were stroking hers in slow, deliberate movements as they rested upon the tablecloth.

Despite Jane’s consideration in providing foods which presented no difficulties for her, Elizabeth ate little, slowly and deliberately. Fatigue, combined with the tumultuous emotions she’d experienced during the morning, brought on a series of yawns she could not prevent.

“Lizzy?” began Jane before biting her lip to keep the rest of her sentence unsaid.

Elizabeth nodded, however, with no inclination to argue. She wanted to sleep and did need assistance in getting upstairs to her bed. While Jane looked after her sister the two men cleared the table. Finally, the blankets were tucked around Elizabeth’s form and she looked up into Jane’s face with sleepy eyes, one request on her mind before she could rest.

A few moments later Will poked his head around the door. “Jane said you wanted to see me. I thought you’d had quite enough of my presence already.” He grinned at her, stepping into the room when Elizabeth motioned for him to sit with her. His eyebrows raised expectantly.

“Tired,” she said, her voice quiet.

“Sleep, Lizzy.” Touching a finger to her cheek, Will gently caressed it.

Her lips formed a pout. “Stay.”

“Here?” he asked, glancing around the room. Elizabeth laughed and colour rushed into his face as he realised his error. “Oh, of course. Yes, I’ll still be downstairs when you wake up.” They were both silent for a moment, Will studying her face and becoming lost in the spell of her gaze. He found himself drawn forward and at the last minute raised his head slightly to place a kiss on Elizabeth’s forehead. “I won’t leave while you sleep. I promise.”

Her eyes closed and she breathed a contented sigh. Will closed the door noiselessly on his way out.

“Jane, you need a break. I’m taking you out for an evening next week and will allow you to pick the day. No arguments.” Charles shook his head and interrupted her before she could object. “I’ll ask Will to stay with Lizzy. You know she’ll be fine with him.”

“I don’t know....”

Her husband would hear none of it. “Well I do. You have poured your heart and soul into caring for your sister since all of this began. If you expect to continue then you must take time to recharge. Will is available any time. You know that, as well as how much he cares about her. Lizzy is not helpless and Will is perfectly capable.”

One of the subjects of their conversation arrived in time to hear his name mentioned. “Of what am I capable?” Will asked.

“Looking after Lizzy when I take Jane out one evening next week,” Charles informed him.

“Sure!” Enthusiasm could not be disguised. “Don’t worry about a thing. I’ll make us some dinner, bring a movie or two to watch and you can enjoy yourselves without another thought for us.”

Jane didn’t appear convinced but she remained silent on that particular matter. Instead she asked, “How is she now?”

“Sleeping,” reassured Will. “Quite soundly, too.” He had waited outside the bedroom door for a few minutes just in case Elizabeth needed anything.

Jane let out a long sigh and rubbed her forehead with both hands. “Good. You have to admit that she looked tired. It was too early to be taking her away from home for hours on nothing more than... a pleasure trip.”

Will opened his mouth, an argument ready on his tongue until Charles raised a hand to silence him.

“It wasn’t hours,” he gently corrected his wife. “One hour at most and perfectly understandable that she’d be tired. Any exertion is going to do that at this stage. I think she needed the change from all that therapy work.” He trained a serious gaze on her. “Lizzy isn’t the only one who’s tired. You’ve pushed your limit, Jane.”

She nodded, too weary to contradict him. “Maybe I’ll have a nap, too.”

“You should,” Charles encouraged. “It’s not necessary for you to be with Lizzy every waking moment. There are many things she can do without assistance and it’s better for her to do what she can for herself than for someone else to coddle her.”

Jane gave him a look of annoyance. “I’m not coddling her.” Nevertheless, she found herself examining her own behaviour and reconsidered his words. “I’ll give her more time to try things on her own, though.” She stood up and smiled at them both. “I am going to lie down for a bit but promise to wake me if Lizzy gets up first.”

Charles agreed and when Jane left he suggested to Will that they go out to the deck in the backyard so they could speak more freely. The air was chilly and damp, typical fall weather, but neither minded in the least. Charles leaned on the railing and looked out over the lawn.

“How was your date this morning?” he finally said.

“Promising,” replied Will. He stood with his hands in his pockets, his brow creased thoughtfully.

“Lizzy seemed a little upset when you returned but I wasn’t sure whether it was with you or with what Jane said at the time.”

Will grunted. “I can’t answer that. I’ve never been completely sure about Elizabeth’s opinions on anything, particularly me.”

Charles turned to look at his friend. “But you believe things look promising now?”

The lingering memory of how Elizabeth’s body felt pressed against his while they sat in the park caused Will to smile slightly. “Yes.”

“You looked rather... comfortable together in the living room earlier.”

Will faced the other man squarely. “What do you want to say, Charles?”

Taking a deep breath he stated, “Go slowly with her from now on, Will, for your sake as much as hers.”

“Is this where you tell me not to keep her out all night and staying over isn’t allowed?” Will asked testily.

His friend smiled. “I’ll let Jane give you that lecture. She’s watching out for Lizzy but I’m concerned about you. I know you won’t do anything to hurt her but she might not be so careful. Will, the physical recovery is going well and you are aware of how much time it takes for each milestone she achieves. Her mental recovery hasn’t even been addressed yet.”

“I hope Wickham gets what he deserves in that prison,” growled Will.

“I have no doubt that he will, if he hasn’t already. They aren’t very tolerant of roommates who abuse women or children.” Charles frowned in thought. “Lizzy won’t be ready for any psychological therapy until she can and is willing to voice her thoughts, however. Have you ever talked about George Wickham with her?”

“No.” Will’s expression darkened even more and he walked several steps away to stand with his back to Charles.

“She hasn’t said anything about him to Jane. We don’t even know how much she remembers.” Painful as it was, he had to ask the next question. “Will, do you believe she remembers anything that happened between you two in the past, that she’s not simply running on emotions created by your attendance upon her during the last few months?”

He would be a fool not to admit that he had feared exactly that from the very beginning of his visits. “I don’t know what she remembers, Charles, but I do believe that what she feels now is genuine, whatever those feelings may be. Not just because I want to but because, no matter what has happened to her, Elizabeth is still the woman of strength and integrity that she ever was. She would not say what she does not mean. Considering how difficult it is for her to speak I’m even more sure of the truth in the words she chooses to use.”

“Has she spoken to you at last?”

Will nodded, unwilling to betray Elizabeth’s privacy by revealing her requests of him. Her first words had shocked and thrilled him but had not filled him with the level of hope that her second appeal had done.

Charles laid a hand on Will’s shoulder. “Lizzy couldn’t find a better champion.”

Cold surrounded her. Her body was being pushed down, deep below the bright surface. She reached upward, stretching her arm as far as possible but it wasn’t enough.

The brightness above her flashed, breaking open and she felt herself drawn up into the light, grasped around the shoulders and pulled from the sucking hold on her feet....

Elizabeth opened her eyes, instantly checking her surroundings and feeling the soft plush animal next to her. She was warm under the blankets but her dream had left behind an icy residue. A whimper rose in her throat and she clutched the tiny animal tightly, squeezing her eyes shut and willing sleep to claim her once again.

Chapter Twelve

Posted on Sunday, 4 December 2005

“It’s a... a...” Will screwed up his face in an expression that made Elizabeth struggle to remain serious. “It’s dinner,” he finally said, scooping it from the pan and onto their plates. “I forget the name. Hey, I just followed the directions Georgiana sent. I only hope it tastes the same as when she makes it.” He set their plates down on the table and made another face. “Doesn’t look favourable, though. Maybe I should order us pizza instead?”

Her laughter bubbled over at that and Elizabeth picked up her fork, bravely sinking it into the mass in front of her and raising it to her lips.

“Wait!” he said, staying her hand with the word. “I feel as if I should be the guinea pig, not you. Let me try it first.” Before he could do so, however, she had popped the fork into her mouth. Will watched in suspense for a reaction.

Elizabeth dropped the fork and clutched at her throat, gagging and waving wildly with one hand.

“Oh, very funny,” he sneered. “You’re making dinner next time, lady.”

She laughed, gesturing for him to try it. “Good,” she said, taking another bite as if to prove her point.

Tentatively, he examined what he’d made. “Jane won’t thank me if I poison you so I’d better eat it, too. She can’t hurt me if I’m dead already.” He tasted it and his expression took on a look of astonishment. “It’s not bad. Not much like Georgie’s but it’s edible, at least.”

In truth the meal was more than passable. Elizabeth ate all that she had been served and Will even had seconds, finishing up what remained in the pan and ensuring there were no leftovers. He didn’t want to leave any evidence, he told her.

Believing they were done, he was surprised when Elizabeth revealed a cake that had been hidden under a cover.

“Did you make it?” Will asked.

“Yes,” she replied. “Jane helped.” Elizabeth had insisted on making the cake, right down to icing it, with little assistance from her sister. Jane wouldn’t allow her to place the pan in, or take it out of the hot oven. The kitchen had been a bit of a disaster area afterward but the boost to Elizabeth’s spirits was more than worth the extra work.

Will set to cutting them each a slice, suggesting they enjoy it in the living room while watching one of the movies he’d brought. A dilemma presented itself, however. He couldn’t lend Elizabeth his arm while carrying the tray with their dessert at the same time. She gave him a look, indicating the cane that rested beside her chair; the cane that she used in the house daily when he wasn’t there. Sheepishly, he nodded and preceded her out of the kitchen.

By the time Elizabeth joined him, Will had the movie ready to go and the coffee table pulled up closer to the sofa. She sat down on the middle cushion, leaving him no option but to sit close beside her. Will laughed quietly at the blatant strategy, feeling very much like a sixteen year old being manipulated by a pretty girl. He had no intention of denying himself the pleasure and took up his place next to Elizabeth.

She looked at him curiously. “What movie?”

“The one that made you squeal when you saw the title,” he teased. “If you get bored with the second one you can just go to sleep and I’ll not hold it against you.” She slapped him gently across his chest.

The sun’s heat warmed her skin within minutes. She could leave behind the pain, purge the dead emotions and feel new again. Every stride took her further from the source of that pain and closer to cleansing. She could never be completely untouched by all that had been said, all that had occurred, but these short respites in the tranquil setting she had grown to love could more than make up for the temporary battles fought elsewhere.

There was a sensation of being watched. Why had she not felt it before? Why, in all of her forays in the park, had she never noticed his solitary figure and sensed his gaze upon her?

The reality was that her mind had almost always been deeply engaged in thoughts and emotions that were better forgotten. An easy target she would have been for any prowling deviant. She was well aware that her safety then was down to the vigilance of Will. Who else was looking out for her? Certainly not George. Never George.

Elizabeth opened her eyes and confirmed what her senses had told her earlier; Will was looking at her, his gaze admiring and not the least bit critical. She reached out to touch his cheek, running her thumb along the edge of his lower lip and seeing his eyes slowly close. His hand sought hers and their fingers intertwined. A contented sigh passed her lips; a moment when words were unnecessary, even superfluous.

Several sweet minutes of silence passed until Will drew in a long breath and spoke softly. “Let me light a fire. It’s getting a little chilly in here.”

Elizabeth shifted her body so that he could ease his out from under her weight. An appreciative smile formed as she observed him hunched next to the fireplace, setting the kindling alight. The flames crackled into life casting an orange glow on the room. Will pushed the table to one side and pulled the thick wool throw rug toward him. Spreading it out on the floor in front of the fire he invited Elizabeth to join him on the softness. She was more than happy to oblige although it felt very strange to be lying on the floor, the thick carpet beneath her. Will was seated with his back against one of the large armchairs, leaning slightly forward to ease her head onto his lap, her shoulders resting along his thighs.

“I did this for you in the hospital, before you began to show signs of awakening.”

Elizabeth felt a flutter of excitement, wondering what was to come, yet feeling a vague sense of familiarity as she watched him rub his hands together to warm them.

“Close your eyes,” he breathed, almost sensually.

So gently did his fingers trace along her temples that Elizabeth barely felt his touch. Feather light, whisper soft, back and forth over her cheeks and across her brow his fingers moved. No sound but the crackle of the fire could be heard. She had long since given herself over to the pleasure Will was offering.

She was nearly lulled to sleep, his technique was so soothing. Elizabeth dared to open her eyes just enough to peer up at Will’s face, an expression of concentration upon it. Her lips moved as she silently said I love you, Will.

His focus was disturbed, his eyes blinked in surprise. Both eyebrows raised slightly as if disbelieving what he’d seen.

Again her lips formed the words. I love you. She fixed her gaze on his eyes, willing him closer. At the last moment he hesitated, diverting her attention with a whispered comment.

“Whatever is in my power to give you, I do so freely. What is it you want, Elizabeth?”

Without another thought, she leaned toward him and stretched herself up until her lips met his. She held nothing back, sending every wish, every desire she felt for him surging through her kiss. His response was immediate and electric, creating a vibration which began in her bones and seeped into her very soul, leaving them both breathless when they parted.

Will looked at her dazedly. “I..... am dreaming, I think.” Elizabeth giggled, bringing his eyes into focus on her face. “You are beautiful,” he whispered, one hand cupped against her cheek. “Tell me the truth, Lizzy.”

She knew what he meant; she had practised the words before the mirror since the day she’d come home. Slowly, carefully, she said it. She voiced what he most wanted to hear. “I love you, Will.”

Nothing had prepared him for it. Imagine as he might, Will had not any expectation of hearing such words from Elizabeth’s lips, certainly not so soon. From the moment she had begun to show real signs of awareness he had been filled with fear; dreadful anticipation of her demanding he not be allowed back to her room. Each day that passed had lessened the fear and strengthened his determination to win her heart. It had been his goal, in addition to seeing her restored to health, the day she was released from the hospital bringing him both joy and despair. Seeing her daily had been his lifeline. He didn’t know what to expect once Jane took control.

Cautiously, Will raised a hand to touch her face, to caress it as he had done countless times before without her knowledge. He watched Elizabeth close her eyes, a whisper of breath passing over her lips as she exhaled, then inhaled deeply. “What is it?” he asked. “What makes you smile so sweetly?”

Without opening her eyes, she said quite simply, “You.”

He could not resist and touched his lips to her own. “I love you, Elizabeth. I have forever loved you, I’m sure of it.”

“I know.” She had spoken more to him in those ten minutes than in the months of his visits but all of it was sincere, all of it must be said. Whether he knew it or not, Elizabeth remembered everything, his words and efforts, while she lay in that hospital bed seemingly insensible to anything around her. The very first thing she had realised was the scent of him, every day, as he leaned over her and kissed her hello and goodbye. When he had left, oh how she missed it! He reminded her of sultry summer days and dazzling sunlight. Nothing compared to the tantalizing lure of those images, drawing her very spirit from the shrouded depths where it lay trapped. When his voice reached inside her, exquisite and resonant, she naturally followed, never looking back and wanting only him. She said it again, hushed but urgent, “I love you, Will.”

Suddenly, quietly, he said, “I’ve wanted to dance with you for months, Lizzy. Dance with me now, please.” He stood and helped her to her feet, wrapping his arms about her waist and holding her securely. There was no music but they didn’t need any. Their hearts beat strongly and in rhythm, their feet moved slowly in time. Will supported her as she clung to him, head resting against his chest and her hands savouring the contours of his back, relishing the sensation possessively. Many times he’d imagined them together like this; the reality was far beyond his fantasy. “Lizzy,” he said, a sudden apprehension seizing him. “Are you sure?”

She raised her head and looked at him. “Yes,” she murmured against his lips. “Oh, yes.”

His hands captured her face, indulging their desire with kisses intended to claim her heart for his own. Elizabeth had long ago taken his and Will had never entertained the wish to have it returned. “I will not let you down. I promise.” His words flowed over, around and through her, every utterance affirming his constancy and finding refuge in her receptive heart.

Jane eyes her husband’s profile as the street lamps alternately brought his features into light and darkness while he drove. The evening had been delightful, although she couldn’t believe how tired she felt after only a few dances. It certainly wasn’t advanced years, not with her twenties barely left behind. Jane was forced to concede that Charles had been correct and, in spite of her original protest, it was time to give Elizabeth more freedom and curb her own mothering instincts. After all, the goal was to make her sister self sufficient eventually. During the early weeks of her recovery Lizzy had been pushed to get her to the point that she was able to go home. Once there it was no time to start babying her. It would undo all the previous progress.

Yawning loudly, Jane hazarded another glance at Charles and found him silently laughing at her. “Alright, I admit it. You were right.” The tender smile accompanying her words softened the sting.

“I didn’t think you’d be able to stay awake this long,” Charles said with a smirk.

Jane laid a hand on his knee. “I’m glad we did this. Thank you for dragging me along.”

“It’s been a long time since we’ve enjoyed ourselves. I think we should do it more often now.” He anticipated some resistance but was pleasantly surprised by her reply.

“Yes,” agreed Jane. “Maybe, just maybe, Lizzy and Will could join us in the future. When Lizzy is stronger and ready to face the world again I want to be there for her. We used to do so much together and I miss it, Charles.”

Putting his hand over hers, Charles gave her fingers a squeeze. “I’m sure Lizzy does, too. Have you made that appointment for her? She’s been talking more and I think it’s time that she deals with what she remembers, or doesn’t.”

“I was going to speak with her about it tomorrow. You know how stubborn she can be. If I make an appointment with the doctor and Lizzy decides to be uncooperative then where does that get us?”

“The doctor will know what to do, whatever reaction Lizzy has.”

She knew he was right; again. “Of course. I’m afraid for her, though. She’s been through so much and it’s all so unfair! Forcing her to relive it, even if only in memory, is going to be painful.”

Charles squeezed her hand again. “It’s necessary, though. I think once she starts, the questions will pour out, too. She’s going to want to know everything; what happened to George, where he is now.”

“At least those answers are pretty straightforward.” Jane sank against the back of her seat. “How do I explain why mom and dad still haven’t come to see her without making Lizzy feel like she’s done something wrong?”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

They were silent, each seemingly considering the challenges that still lay before them as a family. Finally, Jane drew a deep breath.

“I would be very pleased if Lizzy chooses to be with Will, whether it be marriage or something less official. There’s no doubt of his feelings, the strength of commitment he has for her. Lizzy, though....” She hesitated.

Charles knew what she was trying to say. He’d already cautioned his friend about the same thing. “Will was a lost cause long ago where Lizzy is concerned. Whatever she decides will not change the way he feels. He was quite hopeful the other night.”

“I’m not sure she even knows what she feels.”

“Trust her.”

“What if she moves too fast?”

“Trust Will.”

“You have an answer for everything, don’t you,” chuckled Jane.

Charles flashed her a toothy smile. “That’s why I’m paid the big bucks, my dear.”

They arrived home laughing, something that had not been heard often in the Bingley home for a long time. Charles opened the door to a very quiet house. Jane peered around him into the dimly lit entry. A softly flickering glow came from the direction of the living room.

“You go first,” she whispered.

Charles stifled a snort, amused by his wife’s suddenly delicate sensibilities. He took her hand and pulled her forward as he stopped in the opening to the living room. A low fire cast a meagre light into the room but it was enough to reveal the two figures snuggled together under a blanket on the floor in front of the fireplace.

“How sweet,” murmured Jane.

Will stirred with the sound, rolling slightly toward them and peering sleepily up at the couple. “Ah, you are home.”

“Sorry to disturb you,” Charles said. “You had a pleasant evening, I take it?”

“Very pleasant, thank you.” He carefully slipped out from under the blanket without letting any cold air in on his warm companion. “Did you enjoy yourselves?”

“Yes,” replied Jane. She met Will’s gaze, her expression apologetic. “I’m sorry I’ve not been more considerate of your feelings since Lizzy came home. I’m really going to try harder to give you both the time and space you need but please don’t hesitate to tell me when I overstep the boundaries.”

“That is.... very generous of you, Jane.” Will was finding it difficult to believe everything that had happened in that one day. “I know we share the same goal; making sure Elizabeth heals as quickly and fully as possible.” He looked down to where the young woman was still asleep at their feet. “I think right now it’s time to get Sleeping Beauty up to her own bed.”

Elizabeth felt his gaze upon her and opened her eyes. They sparkled, firelight reflecting in their dark depths.

“Time to properly tuck you in for the night,” he said in a hushed voice. “Are you awake enough to tackle the stairs?”

She stretched languorously before replying. “With your help.”

He took her hands and assisted her to stand. For a moment she held tightly to his arms, wobbling slightly while adjusting her balance. Then her smile warmed him and they moved toward the stairs.

Outside the bedroom door Elizabeth paused. “Are they back yet?”

“Yes,” Will said. “They’re just having a glass of wine in the kitchen.”

Her mouth formed a round ‘oh’ before being replaced with a wistful smile. “Thank you,” was all she said aloud but her eyes declared much more. She couldn’t let him go without a kiss, though, and wrapping her arms about his neck Elizabeth did just that. They stood for some time in the doorway, bodies gently swaying together while the promises made earlier in the evening were confirmed in their embrace. At last they moved apart and Will pushed her lightly into the room. Elizabeth blew him one last kiss and closed the door, leaning her back against it and closing her eyes, a radiant smile on her face.

Chapter Thirteen

Posted on Sunday, 18 December 2005

Jane had silently observed her sister through breakfast, a thousand thoughts running through her mind. Elizabeth herself seemed to be far away, needing to be asked several times if she wanted more toast or juice. In spite of her promise, both to herself as well as to Will and Charles, that her anxious behaviour would be curtailed, Jane was finding it difficult to accomplish. Elizabeth was a strong willed woman, equally independent, and although those qualities contributed to the success of her recovery thus far it was also apt to lead her into trouble. There were certain avenues in life that Elizabeth wasn’t ready to travel no matter what she might believe.

Once Charles had left for work Jane poured them each a cup of coffee and sat down at the table, looking directly at her sister. “Lizzy, I think we need to talk about you and Will, where you are going with the relationship.”

Elizabeth gazed at her sister with a challenge in her eyes. “I love him,” she said. The words had come more easily with each repetition so that now there was no hesitation at all.

“I do not doubt your feelings,” Jane carefully said. “I am concerned about the seriousness of the relationship so quickly, particularly when you haven’t even put the last one behind you yet.” She noticed the flicker of Elizabeth’s eyelids with those words. “You’ll have to talk about him sooner or later, Lizzy. I know you’re avoiding it and that you remember more than you are letting on.” She set her cup down firmly on the table’s surface, pushing it out of the way so that she could lean closer and speak more softly. “I’ve made an appointment for you to see Dr. Wendell on Friday.”

Elizabeth’s lips pressed tightly together. When she spoke it was with determination. “I have nothing to tell her.”

“Don’t be foolish. You know better than the rest of us how important it is for you to examine what happened and how you feel about... George. You spent years working with people who needed to do the same thing, confront their past mistakes before they could move on, go forward with their lives.” Jane’s voice began to show frustration. “I was so afraid I’d lost you, Lizzy, in all the months and months of pain watching you fade away! I’m not going to let that happen now that you’ve come this far.”

The scowl on her sister’s face was encouraging in a strange way. Jane wanted to shake her, to make her say something instead of sitting in silence, thinking and feeling without letting it escape. The fact that she was expressing any emotion, even as simple as facial expression, brought Jane a measure of hope for the upcoming session with the psychologist. Clearly, Elizabeth felt this particular topic of discussion was at an end. She had folded her arms and turned her attention toward the calendar on the wall.

“It’s only a couple of months until Christmas,” Jane suddenly remarked. Past years had seen the Bennet family gather together from all parts of the country, until Charles and Jane had married and then the first year apart was spent. It wasn’t just because of their marriage, of course. There was the added complication of George Wickham. Elizabeth wasn’t welcome at home last Christmas and so Jane chose to spend the first holiday with her new husband in their own home, closer to her sister who would otherwise have been left to a lonely celebration with a man who seemed at times to be able to charm the devil himself.

“Need to shop,” declared Elizabeth. “Presents.”

“I’ll help you make a list,” Jane sighed impatiently. “If you want to do the shopping yourself I can rent a wheelchair at the mall so you won’t have to walk so much.”

Elizabeth turned to look at her, an expression mixed with frustration, annoyance and relief. “I hate this!” she blurted out. One fist came down on the table with force. “I want... but I can’t have. I can’t do! I hate it!” She banged her fist again.

Jane stared at her for a moment before reaching for Elizabeth’s hand. “Lizzy, to see you so defiant and so... you, once more!” She pulled her sister to her feet and hugged her fiercely. “You’ve come a long way already. Don’t give up now. I know you are tired and discouraged and I’m sorry I haven’t been more patient with your feelings lately. I couldn’t stand it, seeing you in such pain, and then Will made you smile when I couldn’t. I was scared to lose you all over again. I’m so sorry.”

“Jane.” Elizabeth’s voice was soft. She pushed herself back to see Jane’s face more clearly. “I love Will but I love you, too. I need you both.”

“I know, I know. Will is able to do so much more for you, though.” Jane took a deep breath. “Don’t jeopardise the wonderful relationship you have, and could have, by refusing to face the past before you move on. You’ll be carrying those ghosts with you and I don’t have to tell you what damage that can do.” She studied her sister’s face which gave a vivid reflection of the internal conflict going on behind her silence.

“You’re right,” Elizabeth reluctantly said at last. “Friday.”

“Friday,” repeated Jane. She knew it wouldn’t be easy but at least the first, difficult step had been made.

“I have a surprise for you.” Like an excited child, the look Elizabeth gave him brought a smile to his face. “How would you like to go swimming?”

“Swimming?” The idea more than appealed until the thought of putting on a bathing suit hit her. Elizabeth owned only bikinis, several of them, but the prospect of appearing at a public pool, exposing the frailties which currently plagued her, was frightening.

Will sensed her confusion. “It doesn’t have to be today. I can make arrangements for another time if you prefer. I know how much you’ve always loved the water and I found a therapist who can work with you in that environment. It would be just you and her, nobody else.”

This made the suggestion even more appealing and Elizabeth was even prepared to ask Jane if she could borrow one of her more modest suits for the occasion. Fortunately, her sister had already thought of that, having been informed beforehand of Will’s plan. She stood in the doorway, a bathing suit hanging from her fingers.

“Would this one do?”

The big grin on Elizabeth’s face was answer enough. She pointed to the stairs and pushed Jane ahead of her, giving Will a kiss on the cheek as she passed. “Thank you,” she whispered.

It was more efficient to go prepared than to expend time changing into her suit at the pool. Jane could help her get ready at home. Elizabeth hoped she could manage on her own after the session. It wasn’t long before she was downstairs again, smiling expectantly at Will.

“Am I to understand that the arrangements are acceptable?” He chuckled. “You didn’t need to rush but I’m sure Pam won’t mind us being early.” Elizabeth looked a bit alarmed which only made him laugh again. “Don’t worry. She’s entirely at your disposal, whenever you want to swim and for however long you choose.”

It took the entire drive to reassure Elizabeth that she was not inconveniencing anyone with her eagerness to get started on this new form of therapy. Once at the pool Will introduced her to Pam, then he left her side, finding himself a place to observe without interfering.

The water looked inviting, bringing back countless memories in its reflections.

Elizabeth stepped forward... and stopped. Fear shot through her, the intensity halting her breathing. Darkness rose up before her; stormy colours whirling in a chaotic spiral of purples and black, and then she was falling.

“Lizzy? Lizzy, did you lose your balance?” Will’s voice seemed far away. “She must have slipped on the wet tiles. I shouldn’t have left her to do it on her own!” He was berating himself unnecessarily, she knew, yet her voice could not find an outlet. She hadn’t even opened her eyes. “Lizzy, are you okay? I hope she didn’t hit her head. Damn! I didn’t see if she did.”

A pitiful moan sounded. Elizabeth wondered if it was herself. Judging from the increased questioning from Will it must have been. She managed to open her eyes, looking up into the high ceiling above the pool.

“Thank God,” he breathed. “Lizzy. Lizzy, tell me you are alright. Please be okay.” All she could do was nod weakly and offer another pitiful noise. “Did you hit your head? Are you hurt?”

The questions wouldn’t end. She struggled to answer. “No,” she moaned. “No.” Elizabeth suddenly felt foolish. She hadn’t fallen; her feet hadn’t slipped nor was her balance to blame.

Elizabeth was terrified of the water.

They left the pool without getting her feet wet. Elizabeth’s face burned with embarrassment but Will blamed himself for the lack of success.

“I should have waited. I pushed you into going, didn’t I? All I could think of was how much you enjoyed swimming before and wanted to give you that pleasure again.” His grip on the wheel tightened. “I didn’t think it through.”

“Stop!” Elizabeth cried out.

Startled, Will reflexively jammed his foot on the brake before he realised her meaning. He still pulled the car over, out of the flow of traffic, to give her his full attention. Before he could open his mouth he was interrupted.

“It’s not your fault.” She sat with hands folded in her lap and head bowed. “I didn’t know.”

He looked at her, not understanding. “What didn’t you know?”

“I was scared.”

“Scared?” His hand closed over her clenched ones. “What frightens you, Lizzy?”

She raised her head; eyes wide and troubled met his gaze. “The water. It scares me.”

Will thought quickly. From the numerous times he’d watched her in the pool, in the ocean, he knew Elizabeth was as at home in the water as a fish. No, he corrected himself. She used to be like a fish in the water. Now she doesn’t have that same ability. He shook his head, groaning softly. “I never learned how to swim. I envied you that ease and sense of freedom but what an idiot I am! It never occurred to me that you could be worried that your current limitations would pose a danger in the pool. You know I’d never let anything happen to you, Lizzy, don’t you?”

“Yes, but –.”

“Lizzy, I mistakenly thought this kind of therapy was perfect for you, that you’d enjoy it far more and the benefits would be greater. I should have realised you’d be starting all over again.” Will became aware of the change in her as she listened; as he grew more agitated with himself, Elizabeth began to relax, to lose the tension that had seized her. In another moment she was smiling and turned an amused gaze on him. “What is it? Have I said something funny?”

She bit her lower lip, nodding carefully. “You can’t swim.”

His eyebrows rose. “You find that amusing?”

“Sort of,” she giggled. “Will, do you want to learn?” She saw the surprise at her question and recognised a fear similar to her own. “We can work together.”

There were few challenges that could affect him so directly and it took a moment for Will to fully comprehend how much it would, indeed, test him. He would not expect Elizabeth to undertake anything he wasn’t prepared to try as well. “You’ll have the advantage, you know, already having learned once.” Leaning closer, he murmured, “Be gentle with me, please.”

That request could only bring laughter and Elizabeth delighted in being able to share such a moment with him.

Eyes could convey more information than a person was willing to voice. Jane’s eyes were begging her to speak, yet Elizabeth did not, could not. Perhaps it was that she would not.

How many times had she seen that look in others’ faces; questioning, accusing, pitying, abandoning? They were all asking why, what, how and Elizabeth had no answers. She could no longer fool even herself into believing there was a purpose to her chosen course.

It was time to get out.

Lights flashed on the walls. Her heart pounded, panic rising until she realised it was only the headlights of passing cars on the road outside her bedroom window. Eventually the adrenalin faded and Elizabeth’s mind cleared once more.

Images, vague and fleeting, were left over from her dream. Emotional residue held her, like a persistent decay feeding on old wounds. She searched deeply for something comforting, some pleasant memory from that period.

Waves, gently rocking to and fro....

The wine had tasted good but she’d drank too much of it. Not only did the floating chair move but she could see the rest of the world within her sight was swaying, everything beyond her ability to focus.

“Over here, Dizzy Lizzy,” George beckoned to her from the side of the pool. He wore one of his most convincing smiles and a most flattering pair of shorts. Elizabeth lazily sent the chair in his direction. When she was close enough he reached out to pull her to him. “Come up to bed with me,” he said, voice buzzing in her ear. Extra enticement followed as he flicked his tongue across her earlobe and down the side of her neck.

He gave her every reason to expect attentions that befitted the most deserving of royalty. Their room contained flowers on every surface, the fragrances mixing and sending her already unstable senses into further confusion. George pushed her toward the bed, Elizabeth collapsing gratefully and stretching herself out upon her back.

He plied her with softly uttered compliments, sweet pieces of fruit tucked between her lips while Elizabeth offered no resistance. She allowed her imagination to sail the new currents discovered only recently, feeling Will's hands, Will's lips.....

Elizabeth slept peacefully.

Chapter Fourteen

Posted on Sunday, 1 January 2006

Elizabeth was willing to try again the following day. Will had to scramble to prepare. He had no swimwear and it was not something he would borrow from Charles, nor could he send his secretary out to purchase any for him. Therefore he chose to take advantage of the opinion that mattered most.

“We have more than an hour. Where do we go first?”

Elizabeth considered their options. At such a late time of the year there would be few stores with a decent selection and she was quite particular when it came to quality in swimsuits.

Several stores later Will had never felt so exposed. Elizabeth had appraised each selection with a critical eye, then pronounced judgement. His plan was to quickly find one acceptable pair of swimming trunks and head to the pool but she, evidently, had other ideas. There was a pile of nearly a half dozen she had already approved.

“Four,” she declared. “Buy four.”

He offered no argument, wanting to get the experience over with, and allowed her to pick through the heap and make the final decisions. Only when they reached the checkout was he pleased to discover that Elizabeth had found two swimsuits for herself, likely while he was busy changing again and again. Despite the disapproving frown he received, Will refused to let her pay for her purchases and left the store relieved to have accomplished more than he’d expected.

Elizabeth’s mood was lighter. Will thought another shopping trip might be in order, to buy her some pretty things instead of the practical articles she’d been using so far. He made a mental note to consult with Jane about arranging a convenient time. Elizabeth would need assistance when trying on clothes and her sister would be more useful for that.

When they arrived at the pool the therapist was ready for them and in the water. Elizabeth was able to quickly change by herself, slipping off her loose clothing while Will had to resort to using the change room. By the time he joined them, Pam had managed to get Elizabeth to sit on the pool’s edge and dangle her feet in the water.

“What’s this?” she grinned upon seeing Will. “You’re coming in?”

He shrugged in an effort to disguise his own nervousness. “I could hardly refuse the request of a lovely lady,” he replied, winking at Elizabeth.

“He can’t swim,” she whispered, loudly enough for Will to hear.

“Well then,” declared Pam. “Let’s allow him some time to get comfortable in the shallow end over there while we work on some simple movements to test your muscles.”

Will eagerly agreed, preferring to immerse himself without an audience.

“Over here, Dizzy Lizzy,” George beckoned to her from the side of the pool. He wore one of his most convincing smiles and a most flattering pair of shorts. Elizabeth lazily sent the chair in his direction. When she was close enough he reached out to pull her to him. “Come up to bed with me,” he said, voice buzzing in her ear. Extra enticement followed as he flicked his tongue across her earlobe and down the side of her neck.

She laughed and pushed against the wall, floating just out of his reach. “You’ll have to do better than that.” Lazily trailing one hand in the water, she didn’t notice the smile disappear from his face.

“Come here, Lizzy.” The tone was flinty; sparks of command in the delivery. One corner of his mouth quirked upward as he slid down the wall of the pool and into the water.

She attempted to focus on his expression, beginning to suspect that her choice had not been the best one, but he was moving and so was she, the chair bobbing up and down as it was struck by the small waves preceding him.

There was no time to react; his hand was on her foot, moving up her calf and then, abruptly, her face hit the water.

She came up spluttering and disoriented. A woman’s voice, calm and reassuring, urged her to relax and take deep breaths. Elizabeth felt a solid surface under her feet and knew the water was shallow. Forcing herself to stand, her limbs ceased their panic driven gyrations and she finally opened her eyes. Immediately, she recognised her surroundings and the therapist at her side.

“Elizabeth,” said Pam, watching carefully. “What just happened? You were doing a perfect back float and then suddenly began thrashing about.”

Glancing behind her, Elizabeth saw Will a short distance away, his expression one of deep concern. She turned her attention back to Pam. “A bad memory. That’s all.”

The other woman nodded. She didn’t require the details but knowing that more than physical limits needed to be addressed was helpful in planning their sessions. “Shall we try it again or would you prefer to move on to something different?”

The old saying about getting back up on a horse rang in Elizabeth’s head but she had no desire to feel that sense of helplessness again so soon. “Something else,” she said very quietly.

Will observed until he was satisfied that Pam had handled whatever crisis had arisen. Then he went back to his own exercises and tried not to dwell upon what he’d seen.

“I’d like to ask Jane to join us for a few minutes. Do you have any objection to that?”

Elizabeth stated definitively that she did not mind. She sat quietly while they waited for her sister to arrive. Once more Elizabeth found herself searching the walls for detail; tracing the tiny pattern in the wallpaper, looking for flaws. The door opened, disturbing her examination.

Dr. Wendell welcomed Jane and invited her to sit. “I think it would be helpful to have you share some of our sessions. There may be some memories which Elizabeth finds a little foggy that you could provide more detail. An added benefit, of course, is that discussion between the two of you here may help you to do the same at home.”

Jane looked to her sister for a sign as to how she felt about it. “That sounds reasonable.”

“Elizabeth,” said the doctor, turning her attention fully on her patient. “Any issues you prefer to discuss privately can be done during the sessions when Jane isn’t present. If you feel you need to talk about something on a day we’re to meet as a group then I’m sure Jane won’t mind if you ask her to sit out.”

“Of course not,” Jane hurriedly agreed. “Lizzy, if you don’t want me here just say so. This is for your benefit. I want it to work for you.”

“Very well, then.” Dr. Wendell closed the file and placed it on her desk. “I shall see you alone at the next appointment, Elizabeth. Please see Terri about the dates and times. I know you have several other scheduled appointments and therapies that must be considered. May I have a word with you, Jane, before you go?”

Elizabeth hesitated, glancing suspiciously at the other two, then simply shrugged and bid goodbye to the doctor before leaving.

“We’re still getting acquainted,” Dr. Wendell said to Jane. “Not much progress but it’s progress nonetheless. Elizabeth is resistant and that’s not at all unusual under the circumstances. We have a lot of ground to cover and she’ll have to lead the way at first. I’d like her to be more comfortable with me before delving into more painful subjects. I’ll see how our next private appointment goes but I suspect she’ll be more comfortable with you present because she will expect you to do the greater share of the talking. I don’t mean to discourage you from contributing but try to do so in a manner which requires Elizabeth to respond.”

Jane nodded confidently. “I can do that.” She rose and shook the other woman’s hand. “Thank you, Doctor. I know this isn’t going to be easy but I will be there for Lizzy every step of the way.”

Several weeks of increased effort had the desired effect; Elizabeth’s mobility was greatly improved as well as her attitude. Will’s ability to keep up with her in the water fell short of her accomplishments, however.

There were still some mental challenges to overcome. Elizabeth’s sessions with Dr. Wendell had only scratched the surface, revealing no more than the obvious details of the relationship with George Wickham. That he was an abuser with a long history was clearly known to Elizabeth. She freely admitted that discovering his past problems had been a key motivator to continue seeing him. The goal-driven social worker in her saw only the potential for redemption, failing to recognise the danger to herself. At no point had Elizabeth indicated a willingness to concede that she’d lost control of the situation before the final act of violence declared it at an end. Indeed, she had never been in control at all.

Jane was an equal participant in two out of every three sessions, family counselling playing an important role in her sister’s healing. Living in the same house it was difficult to ignore the signs of denial in Elizabeth’s behaviour. She threw herself into her physical recovery process, soaked up every minute of attention from Will, yet had little to say about the darker moments of her own past two years.

Jane had spoken with Will and found that he had also seen evidence of Elizabeth’s suppression of her memories. There were unexplained fears, odd instances of daring acts similar to those of a rebellious teenager testing her mortality. It was alarming at times; Will had always led a safe, secure existence with few opportunities to truly take any risks beyond the boardroom. More than once his car had very nearly ended up in a ditch when Elizabeth stationed herself behind the wheel and insisted on being allowed to drive, at least a short distance. Another time she chose to distract him in a rather delightful manner when she had felt an urgent need to reassure him of her own feelings.

She lifted their hands to her lips to kiss the tender middle of his palm, watching his reaction from the corner of her eye. Pleased, she flicked her tongue across the skin’s surface and saw his eyelids flutter.

“Elizabeth,” Will said, his voice hushed and low. “Your sister would kill me if I let you take me where I think you have in mind.” His eyelids dropped until she was sure he could barely see through the slits. Placing his hand back on the shifter she raised a saucy eyebrow at him. “Oh, no,” he laughed. “If you want more from me you’ll have to ask with words. Consider it therapy.”

Elizabeth pouted, inwardly pleased with the challenge he’d presented, knowing she would have to work for what he quite clearly wanted, too. She was thrilled to think of all the practice she might need with particular words and phrases.

“I can’t help being impatient for her to get those feelings out into the open,” said Jane, stretching to relieve a cramp in her neck. “I hope it’s soon. Mother called today.”

Will looked up from his cup of coffee. “Oh no.”

“Oh, yes,” she nodded. “Mom feels it’s time to burn some bridges. She never gets these sayings right but, anyway, she said they’re coming here to spend Christmas with us since we didn’t go there last year.”

“They being whom, exactly?”

“Mom, Dad and Mary at the very least. I haven’t heard from Cathy but she’s just as likely to stay home or go to the Caribbean as come here.”

Will’s frown deepened. “Why now? Why weren’t they here four, five or six months ago when Elizabeth needed them most?”

“I don’t know.” Quickly, Jane corrected herself. “Oh, yes. I do know but it’s not going to go over at all well with Lizzy.”

“I can’t imagine any explanation would convince her,” grunted Will.

“Do I really need to remind you of our mother’s behaviour at Charles’ and my wedding? Her primary goal in life was to indoctrinate her daughters in how to get a husband, preferably rich, and keep him. In her opinion, Lizzy failed on both counts. George didn’t marry her and Lizzy couldn’t hang onto him.”

“I don’t think I can comment on that without offending you.”

Jane chuckled. “You wouldn’t offend me, Will. I feel the same way. However, this is the part Lizzy really won’t like. Mom figures some fast, firsthand advice will prevent her wayward daughter from making the same mistake with you.”

“Now you really would be offended if I voiced my thoughts!”

Jane shook her head in reply. She and her sisters had been subjected to the same ritual year after year. Elizabeth wasn’t the only one who disagreed with their parents but she was the only one to ever tell them so. Jane hoped this year would see no difference but who could tell with the current state of affairs?

“I don’t suppose you’ll let me take Elizabeth away while the rest of your family visits?” Will raised his eyebrows hopefully.

“You know that won’t solve anything,” laughed Jane.

“No,” Will grinned, “but I’m sure we’d have more fun spending a couple of weeks alone.” Serious again, he asked, “How long have we got to prepare for the onslaught?”

“Well, that’s the beauty of it. They won’t get here until the twenty-third and then leave for home again on the twenty-eighth. I told her there just isn’t enough room in this house with Lizzy using one bedroom and all of her furniture stored downstairs. They have to stay at a hotel and there is no way Dad will spend more than he has to! Holiday rates being what they are I’m surprised he still agreed to come.”

Will opened his mouth to speak and then quickly snapped it shut again. Jane stared at him.

“Don’t tell me you were about to offer what I think you were! You didn’t almost say they are welcome to stay at your place, did you? Oh, Will! I could never let you do that to yourself!” Jane laughed merrily as she imagined her mother examining every inch of Will’s home, appraising the furnishings and decor while making notes for changes Elizabeth should make when she moved in. “You’d never get Mom to leave.”

They both laughed at the horror of it and were still laughing when Elizabeth joined them after her shower.

“What’s so funny?” she asked.

“Will very nearly made the biggest mistake of his life purely out of the goodness of his heart,” Jane explained. “He almost offered to let Mom, Dad and Mary stay at his place when they come for Christmas!”

Elizabeth’s smile faded. “Mom’s coming here?”

Jane suddenly realised she hadn’t had an opportunity to inform her sister of this latest development. “I’m sorry, Lizzy. I didn’t mean to drop it on you like that. Mom called earlier and shocked me, too.”

“Perfect!” she spat out. “Just perfect!” A quick glance toward Will confirmed that he knew what to expect from the venerable Dolores Bennet and only made Elizabeth more angry. “I won’t stay here with Mother. I’ll go to Will’s.”

Two sets of eyebrows shot up in surprise. Jane quickly assured her sister that it wouldn’t be necessary. “Dad has already made reservations at a hotel.” Then she reconsidered the suggestion. “On second thought, maybe it’s not a bad idea after all. Mom and Dad don’t need to know and she’ll be just as pleased if I tell her you’re out with Will when you aren’t here.”

“Jane, you’d lie for me!”

“Lizzy, after everything else this year I’ll be thrilled if lying to Mom and Dad is all it takes for her to leave you two in peace!”

Will looked from one sister to the other. It appeared that he was to have a houseguest at Christmas after all and he wasn’t exactly sure if he should be pleased or alarmed.

Chapter Fifteen

Posted on Sunday, 8 January 2006

Georgiana Darcy eyed the state of her brother’s room, her mouth falling open as she comprehended the extent of his obsession with Elizabeth Bennet. His home office was the sole room in the house that was off limits to the housekeeper, thus all evidence of his preoccupation could be found in that one place.

She knew he'd been taking advantage of every waking hour that he could in order to fulfill his obligations. For each hour he spent with Elizabeth in the afternoons he would schedule two in the evening for catching up. His secretary had been quite helpful in providing Georgiana with the pertinent information and names with which to fortify her position. As she surveyed the carpet of files she knew to be chaotically organised in some crude fashion, a plan of attack began to formulate.

Tossing his keys onto the table beside the door, Will removed his jacket as he made his way to the kitchen, flinging it onto a chair in passing. He opened the freezer and pulled out the first box his hand touched, then tore open one end to slide the contents onto a plate. Into the microwave it went, the few minutes of cooking time allowing him enough to pour a glass of scotch and return to hear the chime.

He carried the plate and glass to his office, shoving the door open with one foot and then stopping in his tracks at the sight which greeted him. “What the....?” He stared in horror at the clear floor. “Corinne,” he muttered, his housekeeper’s name falling from his lips like a curse.

“Don’t blame her,” came a voice from the corner behind him. Georgiana watched him absorb the fact of her presence and saw in his face the various possible explanations cross his mind. “No need to panic. I didn’t throw out anything important.”

Will kicked the door closed, crossing to the desk and dropping his plate on the surface. He said nothing, merely examined every inch of the room with an ever deepening frown. Finally he faced his sister and spoke, his voice quiet, even but displeased. “Georgiana, you may feel free to stick your nose in my personal life but don’t ever think I’ll tolerate this kind of interference with business.”

“When you bring it home,” she replied in an equally steady tone, “it becomes personal and anything that puts you at risk is fair game for my involvement.”

“You don’t really want me to go to the office at this hour, do you?” Will sat down in his chair, feeling the advantage of having the massive piece of furniture between them. Georgiana looked quite small on the other side.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Will.” She left her own chair and moved closer, rounding the desk to stand beside him. Her hand rested on one of his shoulders and he looked up at her suspiciously. Georgiana patiently shook her head. “Tell me what you are planning to do about Elizabeth.”

His brow creased even more. “What do you mean?”

“I imagine you want to marry her at some point. Am I wrong?”

He looked down at the grain of the wood where his hands rested. “No, you aren’t wrong. If you’re asking when that will happen, though, I have no answer for you.”

“Good.” She walked away to grab a chair and draw it closer to the desk. “Look, Will, if you’re going to marry Elizabeth and have any kind of normal family life... you do want some kids, don’t you?” Smiling at the slightly embarrassed affirmative, Georgiana pressed on. “Well, you can’t have any of that and still put in the same kind of hours at work. Will, I’m telling you now to find another CEO to take over. You have the luxury of choice; so many others don’t. Use it!” The idea had obviously never occurred to him, she saw. It also clearly frightened him.

“I can’t do that.”

“Yes you can. You can, Will!” She grabbed his hands and shook them to get his attention. “It’s not a sign of weakness to let some of the responsibilities go to others. I see first hand the results of men like you not knowing when to cut back. I won’t have you become one of them.”

He shook off her touch and left the chair. “Melodrama isn’t your style, Georgie.”

She studied him for some time before replying. “After all the time you’ve spent with Elizabeth, so closely involved with her recovery, her therapy, I can’t believe you would want to go back to those twelve to fifteen hour days. Remember how little we saw of dad?”

Will remembered that quite clearly. “We all have responsibilities. Dad had them, too.”

“He had a choice,” Georgiana argued. “He chose to run the company himself, single handed, instead of paying someone else to work the long hours. Mom complained to him more often than not. If you don’t remember that I certainly do. Elizabeth is going to have challenges beyond the everyday tasks of being a wife and mother, if you are so blessed. You know that some of her limitations are going to remain for the rest of her life. Are you willing to risk the relationship you’ve built for the sake of... of your pride?”

Abruptly, he turned around to face her. “What do you mean by that?”

“Come on, Will. Admit it! You don’t want to give it up. You don’t think anyone else can do as good a job. Or worse, if you let someone have the chance he might prove he can do a better job. What a wound to your ego.”

“Don’t turn this into psychobabble, Georgie. If I thought your idea was a good one I’d be more than willing to turn over the reins. Pride is not keeping me there. I’ve let a lot of jobs go to others in the last few months as I’ve spent more time with Elizabeth.” A crooked grin appeared on his face. “Now, if you want to talk about people working long hours, tell me when you last spent an evening at home or went out on a date.”

“Don’t change the subject.” She couldn’t stay angry with him, though, and laughed at the accuracy of his attack. “I’m here now, aren’t I?”

A thoughtful expression replaced his frown. “Yes, and now that you’ve mentioned it, why didn’t you let me know in advance?”

“What?” Her surprise was evident. “I always come home at Christmas, or try to! Since when do I have to give you notice?”

Will rubbed the back of his neck impatiently, returning to his chair. “It’s just... I didn’t expect you and... Elizabeth is going to stay here for a few days.”

Georgiana’s eyebrows rose as a smirk appeared. “I see.”

“No, you don’t see,” he said, fingering a paperweight. “She was to stay in your room and now, well....”

“She’ll have to stay in yours.” His sister’s smirk grew. “Do you take me for an idiot, Will? She was never going to be in my room.”

He carefully put down the paperweight. “Actually, she was. Elizabeth isn’t ready to move forward to that kind of relationship, yet. She thinks she is but there’s still too much emotional baggage to tackle. I’d love to say we’re doing fine, on our way to the altar and happy ever after but the truth is that she’s got a lot to face before taking that next big step.”

Georgiana sank down into her chair. “Why is she going to stay here, then?”

“Oh, that’s another messy part of her baggage. The rest of her family has come for the holidays and she just doesn’t want to be accessible to them. I can’t blame her at all. They give new meaning to the word dysfunctional.”

“Oh, Will. That sounds horrible.” Her smile returned. “Well, at least Elizabeth and I will have an opportunity to get to know one another better. She can have your room and I guess you’ll just have to sleep in here, brother dear.”

He gazed about him with dismay. “And you wanted me to spend less time on work. I’m going to be surrounded by it all night.”

“I’m sure it will not disturb you in the least,” teased his sister, “while you know Elizabeth is in the house.”

You have no idea how right you are! he thought, suspecting that even Georgiana’s presence wasn’t going to deter Elizabeth very much from her goal. He was more exhausted than he’d admit from trying to maintain the physical distance in their relationship. “Georgie, don’t misunderstand me. I love Elizabeth more than life itself and there is nothing I want more than to just – I am human, after all. Believe me when I say that I’m glad you’re here and I’m counting on you to do more than find amusement at my expense. Elizabeth needs a friend who is not family and is not the man she wants to torment with her sexuality every minute of the day!”

“Oh, Will!” She raised a hand to her mouth, unable to stifle the laughter at his predicament. “I can’t believe you want me to play chaperone!”

“It’s not funny, Georgie.”

“Will, I’m a doctor. I know exactly what it’s costing you.” Nevertheless, a snort escaped as she tried to keep a straight face.

“Well, that’s very comforting, I assure you,” he grumbled. “I thought you were concerned about my health.”

“Believe me, sweetheart,” she giggled. “Nobody has ever died of frustration.”

His face was bright red. “I’m sorry I ever mentioned it.” Will was forced to wait another five minutes while his sister struggled to stop laughing.

“I’m sorry,” she finally managed. “I’ve just never heard a man with such a complaint.”

“You know it’s not a complaint, Georgiana. It’s Elizabeth’s well-being I’m concerned about.” All humour was at an end for Will.

“Of course. Then let’s get back to the original question.”

He sighed. “What was that?”

“Are you willing to risk a future relationship with Elizabeth and your children just to keep your position as the Big Man at the Office?”

His sister’s suggestion was taking root. “I’ll concede that what you say makes sense but what about –?”

“The business?” she finished for him. “Will, I’m not asking you to resign or give up all interest in it. I wouldn’t let you do that anyway. I have as much to lose as you do if it goes under. I trust you. Trust yourself. If you choose the person to take your place I’m sure there will be no discernible difference.”

Will didn’t answer for some time. He sat silently, eyes closed but his mind busily working. Finally, when Georgiana had neared the end of her patience, he said, “I will.... think about it.”

“Where is she? Where is my beautiful Jane?” Charles hid a grimace as his mother-in-law pinched his cheek. “Oh, such a handsome young man!” gushed Dolores Bennet. “You and my daughter will make the most perfect babies!” She was stubbornly oblivious to the bright flush in his face with her comment. “Now, where is that daughter of mine?”

“At least let us all get in the house first, Dolly,” came the exasperated voice of her husband. “Hello, Charlie.”

Charles stepped back to usher Dolores through. Mary was behind her, quietly waiting her turn to escape the cold and placing a modest kiss on the cheek of her brother-in-law. Bringing up the rear, laden with bags and boxes, was Ted Bennet. Charles relieved him of some of his burden.

“Bring the rest through here,” he said, nodding toward the living room.

Dolores had already completed her inspection of the room. ‘Where is your tree? Don’t tell me you’re one of those conservationist types, getting all worked up about killing trees and what a waste it is for a couple of weeks in the year! You could always get an artificial one, you know. Not as nice looking but it would do if you’re dead set against real trees. You’ve got to have a Christmas tree of some sort, though. We had one very year when Jane was growing up. She –.”

“Dolly, you are rambling.” Ted gave her a stern look. “Let the boy get a word in.”

“Thank you,” said Charles. “First of all, Jane is out getting some groceries. We weren’t expecting you until later this afternoon. Secondly, she thought Ted might like to pick out the tree tomorrow. I understand that you and Lizzy used to do that together every year.”

Ted’s gaze drifted away while his wife responded to the suggestion. “What a marvellous idea! Oh, but is Lizzy capable? I thought she couldn’t walk. What if she falls into a coma again and he can’t wake her up?”

“Oh, for God’s sake, Dolly! People don’t just fall in and out of a coma,” Ted angrily barked.

“Well, how am I supposed to know that?” she whined. “I don’t watch all those medical shows like you do. Where is Lizzy, anyway? Does she stay up in her room?”

Feeling his patience waning, Charles tried to remain polite when he said, “No, she had a therapy session this morning and Will took her to that, then they were going shopping. I’m not sure what time they will be back. Can I get you something to drink or eat? You must have left early this morning.” He didn’t wait to hear any reply but escaped to the kitchen to make some coffee. Surprisingly, Mary opened the door behind him.

“Charles? Can I help you in here?”

She looked frazzled and he recalled that she had spent the last several hours in confinement with her parents. “Thanks, I appreciate it,” he said with a sympathetic smile.

They weren’t long in getting a plate of cheese and crackers together, the cookies Jane had baked were already arranged on a tray and needed only to be unwrapped, and Charles carried the coffee cups to the living room while Mary brought the rest.

“Is this Will?” Dolores immediately asked, holding up a framed photo. “I don’t have my glasses so I can’t see it too clearly but I seem to remember he’s a very handsome fellow. Where did I put my glasses? Teddy, do you know what I did with them?”

“Left them in the car, maybe?” he mumbled in a tired voice.

“Oh, yes! Would you be a dear and get them for me? Charles, did I understand rightly that Will has been working very closely with Lizzy on her therapy?” She completely ignored her husband’s grumbling as he went to do her bidding.

“Er.. I don’t think I said that,” Charles said, distracted by the departure of Ted. “Jane was pretty busy with everything else and Will offered to take Lizzy to her appointment.” The fact that his friend also collected Elizabeth’s clothing and other necessities for her stay at his place was not something that needed mentioning. Elizabeth had been giddy with excitement that morning and Jane all too eager to shove them out the door together.

“Oh, but shopping afterward! Such a considerate young man!” She suddenly looked thoughtful, a puzzled frown slowly creasing the heavy makeup around her eyes. “Well, he must frequent the more exclusive shops, I imagine. The sales staff in those places are most helpful.” She continued to look unsure, though.

“I think they were going to the mall, actually. Lizzy had a list of things to buy.”

“Where will you get the tree tomorrow?” Mary spoke up.

Charles was grateful for the change of subject and spent some time describing the farm where they could cut their own fresh tree, the family’s long history in the area and the delightful time they’d had the previous year when he and Jane had picked out their first tree together. “Lizzy came along, too, and then helped us to decorate it. We had a great time that evening and I’m sure it will be just as much fun when they bring the tree home this time.”

Ted had returned and seemed startled at the mention of that Christmas. “Lizzy was with you last year? I didn’t think George would.....”

“He was here, too,” Charles quietly informed them.

“You welcomed him into your home.” The tone was bitter.

Charles let his breath out slowly. “We welcomed Elizabeth into our home. George was endured.”

There was silence for a few moments, even Dolores eyeing her son-in-law cautiously. At last, Ted spoke again. “How well has Elizabeth recovered, really? I suspect Jane’s descriptions are sugar-coated so I’m prepared for the worst.”

“The worst?” Shaking his head, Charles barely contained a derisive snort. “Seven months ago was the worst when Jane was convinced her sister would never awaken. Every day since then has only gotten better. Do you have any idea what it’s like to lose all hope when you’ve spent months wishing a miracle would happen? I had to watch Jane experience that and I’m telling you, I don’t want to ever go through it again.” He couldn’t stay still, got up from his chair and paced the room. “It would have been easier if Lizzy had died that night but thank God that didn’t happen.” Pausing in his steps, Charles looked at both Bennet parents, trying to keep his anger in check. “Did you call the hospital, even once, in all this time? Did you know what was happening to your daughter? To either of them?”

“I did.” Mary’s meek voice squeaked. All three turned to stare at her. “I had to know. I love my sister, too.” Her gaze fell to her lap where her fingers were picking at a brightly patterned napkin.

“Good for you, Mary.” Charles stood tall, smiling at the young woman. “Look, I’m sorry it has come to this. I didn’t mean for things to get unpleasant but it’s better now than when Jane arrives or, heaven forbid, Lizzy and Will return.”

“That brings us to another point,” began Ted. “What is going on between them? What sort of fellow is he? I wasn’t impressed with him when we first met and I’m certainly not going to approve any kind of –.”

“Approve? Approve!” Charles laughed. “Ted, after abandoning Lizzy over her mistake in getting involved with George Wickham how can you even sit there and suggest that your approval is important with regard to Will Darcy? He’s one of the finest men I know and wouldn’t harm a fly if it bit him. He’s also been there for Lizzy, unlike her family! Oh, don’t get me started, Ted.” He glanced at his mother-in-law who was just opening her mouth to speak. “And don’t you say a word, Dolores! I don’t want either of you upsetting Jane with all this garbage. It’s going to be tense enough as it is. Elizabeth doesn’t want to see either of you but Jane convinced her to at least give you a chance. Don’t blow it.”

The sound of the front door and Jane’s voice startled them all.

“Honey? Is that Dad’s car out front? Can you help me with the groceries?”

“Not a word,” Charles commanded, one finger punctuating the air. “Coming, dear!” He hurried to help Jane, Mary following just as quickly.

Jane was thrilled to see her sister. “Mary! Oh, you look beautiful! What have you done with your hair?”

Charles offered to bring the bags from the car so the ladies could take them to the kitchen, giving him the opportunity to cool off while they chatted. He hoped Jane’s parents were doing the same.

Elizabeth tossed a handful of snow at Will, managing to make some fall inside his collar. She laughed as he tried to remove most of it before it melted.

“You’re going to regret that,” he teased, then instantly swore when her eyes widened and the smile disappeared. “Lizzy, I’m sorry. You know I didn’t mean it, right? I wouldn’t hurt you.” He dropped the snow he’d picked up but made no move toward her. “Lizzy?”

She looked up, met his eye and smiled weakly. “I know.” Reaching out her arm to him, Elizabeth’s smile warmed when he took her hand. “Take me home, Will. Please.”

Their walk had been pleasant up until then. Will cursed his stupidity and careless choice of words. The morning had been productive; Elizabeth had completed the shopping she needed to do and he had succeeded in outfitting her in a new winter coat, boots and all the necessary accessories. It had been a satisfying experience to watch her eyes light up when they’d entered the store and she’d seen all the displays of beautiful clothing. He had persuaded her to try on whatever caught her eye, silently indicating to the saleswoman to put aside the items that she most liked so that he could pick them up later. When they came to the coats Will made no secret of the fact that he wanted to purchase one immediately and urged Elizabeth to be completely frivolous in her selection. She was too excited to object and he was only too pleased to see her enthusiasm. When their shopping excursion came to an end he suggested a walk in their park to test out her new boots and make sure the coat was warm enough for winter.

Elizabeth insisted on trying out her new gloves to ensure that snowballs could be thrown.

There were few people in the park, some walking dogs which Elizabeth stopped to admire. Then they set out on her favourite path, the one she used to run daily so long ago when the weather was fine. The air was cool and soundless but for the occasional chirp of a bird and their own breathing. Will steadily held her arm as they walked the snowy trail. As they approached a curve in the path she pulled him to the side and quickly kissed him, then laughed and broke away, scooping up snow and lobbing it at him as she continued ahead of him.

He caught her once, braving the attack to press forward and plant a cold, snowy kiss on her lips. She had ammunition, though, and pressed it against his ear to effect her escape, her laughter floating through the nearby trees.

Then all the fun was quickly extinguished with a few words.

Silently, they walked back to the car. Will could not let go of the disappointment he felt with himself.

Elizabeth had forgotten the entire incident, reliving the sense of freedom she’d felt while they played on the secluded path. All of her pain ceased to trouble her; she refused to let it disturb the peace she had found in those brief moments.

“Oh.” She suddenly stopped.

Concerned, Will looked at her anxiously. “What is it?”

Elizabeth’s face reflected shock. “I didn’t get you a present!” Will’s relieved laughter did not console her for this oversight. “How could I?”

“Lizzy, I have you. I don’t need anything else.” He wrapped his arms around her, drawing her into his warmth and gently kissing her brow. “All I’ve ever wanted is you since the first moment I saw you here in this very park, hanging from a tree.”

She snorted in surprise. “But I thought...”

“You thought the first time I’d seen you was when Charles tried to talk me into a blind date?” He laughed softly. “No, my dear. You cannot imagine how stupid I felt when I recognised you and realised what I’d said and done. I just kept piling mistakes on mistakes after that.”

Unexpectedly, Elizabeth kissed him. Then she looked him in the eye and said, “I wanted you when you first kissed me.” He seemed a little confused so she enlightened him some more. “The night before Jane’s wedding.”

“But you said –!”

“I was awful, I know. I’m sorry.” She was genuinely regretful and held on to him more tightly, wishing the hurt she’d caused could be as simply erased.

It was nothing compared to what she had suffered, however, and Will was struck by a new thought; had George Wickham known her true feelings?

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