Section I, Next Section
Posted on Friday, 9 July 1999
Fun Loving & Outgoing
SWF, 21, enjoys music, movies
hiking & sports, seek someone to
share fun, laughter, and friendship.
"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Elizabeth Bennet shook her head, "It sounds so incredibly cheesy, and who knows what some pervert might assume 'fun' means. Besides, only about four people in the entire world read the prestigious Meryton Gazette. Everyone in town will know this is me."
"I think you'll change your mind," her sister, Jane, smiled, "Who knows? If you don't get any favorable responses, so what? But if you do, your summer home might be a lot more enjoyable."
"Ha, you just don't want me tagging along with you and Charles the whole time," teased Elizabeth, "But I have been lonely since I got home. All my college friends live so far away..."
"And Kitty and Lydia aren't exactly the best company," Jane rolled her eyes, "And of course Mary is taking that summer school class, so she's busy the whole time. That leaves just Mom and Dad."
"You're right," sighed Elizabeth, "I guess someday I'll thank you for this...but not today!"
Charles Bingley glanced over his shoulder before cracking open the personal ads. He scanned the whole first column before a knock on his office door made him thrust the paper into the top drawer of his desk.
"Uh, come in," he called.
"Is this a bad time?" asked William Darcy.
"Oh, Liam, it's only you," Charles relaxed and pulled the paper from its hiding place, "You'll laugh when you see what I've been up to."
"Hmm, tired of wedded life already?" joked Liam when he saw the title.
"Very funny," said Charles, "No no, it's just that Jane said she finally persuaded her sister to write a personal ad, and I was trying to see if I could find it."
"Maybe this is her," Darcy turned the paper around so he could read, "DWF, 50+, reubenesque, talkative, seeks SWM for dinners out and fireside cuddling."
"I don't think so," laughed Charles, "But it sounds like the perfect woman for you!"
"Oh please, Charles, you know I don't go for older women," Liam smiled.
Just then the secretary poked her head into the office and tactfully announced that the conference room was full of cranky CEOs who couldn't possibly wait for Bingley another moment.
"Oh, it's already ten o'clock!" cried Charles, "I had almost forgotten! Well Liam, make yourself at home, if you want. I'll be back just as soon as I deliver my report." He left the office
Darcy nodded good-bye, then turned back to the paper. He looked around again to make sure the door was closed, then looked back at the paper. Normally he wouldn't even consider touching such rubbish, but he found some of the entries quite amusing: Seeks Truck Driver, Speak Spanish to Me!, Not Desperate Just Picky. Finally, he sank into Charles's desk chair, deciding he had some time to waste.
The honorable Rev. William Collins leaned as far out the window as he could without falling into the petunia bed. His ears hadn't deceived him, a car was passing! He waited...it came closer...it passed. He sighed and carefully ducked his head back through the window. It was not Catherine De Bourgh's silver BMW, it was only the mail truck.
Exactly ten minutes later, Rev. Collins went to the front door to meet the mailman. The unfortunate postal service worker sighed. Everyday, come rain or snow or sleet or hail, it was the same story: "No, sorry sir. Here's your mail."
"Did you see Mrs. De Bourgh's car pass during your route?" he asked.
"No, sorry sir. Here's your mail," the mailman sighed again.
Rev. Collins took it, then bent down to retrieve the daily paper before returning to his study. Perhaps Mrs. De Bourgh was staying in her elegant air-conditioned mansion today since it was so hot. Well, no matter. He could still follow her advice, even if she was not there to dispense it. He sat down and tried to recall her exact words, just as she had uttered them the day before:
"You must marry! Choose properly. Choose a refined, educated person for my sake, and for your own make her an active, useful sort of person, not brought up too high. Find such a woman as soon as you can, marry her, and I will visit her!"
Rev. Collins shuddered with excitement at the thought. Mrs. De Bourgh would be paying even more visits to his humble abode! It was almost too much! He threw the mail onto the desk and whipped open the paper to the personals section. He read through several of them before coming to Fun Loving & Outgoing.
George Wickham pulled the sheets tighter around himself and rolled over. Big mistake. Bright light coming from the window shone right onto his eyes. Grumbling, he reached over to yank the shade down, and in doing so noticed the clock. It was noon.
"Oh no!" he jumped out of bed, upsetting a couple of half-full beer cans in the process. Clearly written in bold letters on the calendar were the words "Job Interview," and now he'd almost definitely blown it. He grabbed some pants and a fairly clean shirt, shoved half a doughnut in his mouth, and left the apartment, realizing that he had forgotten his keys the moment he closed the door.
"Oh no," George mumbled, trying the doorknob, then frantically pounding on the door, "Oh no!"
Finally, he decided that he had no choice but to wait until his roommate, Denny, returned home. George ambled downstairs to the lobby, and sat down in a chair by the front door. Noticing a newspaper on the small table next to him, he picked it up and skimmed through the daily news. Seeing that there was more trouble in eastern Europe, he sighed, "Oh no."
Eventually, he made it to the personal ads. As he was never one to pass up a potential date, he read on. Many of them were absolutely ridiculous, like Speak Spanish to Me!, but certain others he found rather interesting...
Part 2 Posted on Saturday, 10 July 1999
"Lizzy, are you a temporary summer journalist or something?" Lydia asked her four days later, "You have two letters from the Gazette."
"Oh, thanks," she said, taking the letters and fleeing to her room. Nobody but Jane knew that she had placed an ad, and she wanted to keep it that way. She picked up the phone.
"Hello, Jane? Are you busy? Would you care to come over for a few minutes, or could I come over there? I've got some responses already."
Elizabeth pulled up at 105 Netherfield Boulevard and saw Jane eagerly waiting for her. She parked the car and headed up to the house.
"Why don't we sit outside?" suggested Jane, "It's such a nice day."
They went around to the backyard and sat at the picnic table. Then Elizabeth tore into the first envelope and read aloud:
Dear Fun Loving & Outgoing,I cannot possibly express to you the feelings of happiness I felt upon reading your advertisement in the Meryton Gazette. It spoke to me in some way I cannot define. Your words seemed to jump off the paper at me, and I felt as if you were right there in the room, speaking to me.
"Must have been the voices in his head," laughed Elizabeth, "He sounds like a loony tune already."
"Keep reading!" insisted Jane, "You never know."
You mentioned that you enjoy music and films. Ever since I moved to this area and came under the influence of my patroness, Mrs. Catherine De Bourgh, I have had a high appreciation for music and art of all forms. If you are not acquainted with her (which you may not be, for she is clearly a member of the elite) then it is my pleasure to inform you of her. She is the highly respected author of several self-help books, including the recent favorite, How to Succeed in (Everybody's) Business Without Really Trying: Tips for Snoops. Perhaps you recognize some of her older titles, such as Order in the Ranks!: How to Dress for your Station in Life, or The Who's Who of Apothecaries...
"Oh whoopee," blurted Elizabeth, "I didn't even know people still used apothecaries."
"Just keep reading," said Jane patiently.
...She is also the widow of the late Wall Street tycoon, Lewis De Bourgh. As you can see, I am extremely fortunate to have her as a patroness and general advisor.It was her recommendation that I form a long term relationship, but at the present all I seek is a new friend in the community, and as we seem to share many interests, such as sports, and music and movies as I mentioned earlier, I decided I should follow my instincts and write to you. Hopefully you will wish to continue this correspondence, and I have included my address below. I humbly thank you for your time.
William Collins
"Well that was a rather abrupt ending," said Jane, "Especially after he had so much to say in the first paragraph."
"It's a pity this Mrs. De Bourgh didn't place an ad," said Elizabeth, "Then he could have just written to her and not wasted my time."
"I don't think it was a waste of time," said Jane as she reread the letter, "He sounds nice, maybe a bit wordy, but nice. And think, he didn't include much information about himself. At least you could write to him and ask for a more personal description. Then you could make your final decision."
"Well, let's read the next one," Elizabeth said as she ripped the envelope open, "Ooh, this one included a picture. He's not bad looking."
Dear Fun Loving & Outgoing,First, let me say that I connected with every activity you listed in your ad. That may not mean much, since lots of people are sports and music enthusiasts, but for some reason I felt compelled to write and find out more about you. Let me tell you a little bit about myself.
I work as an auto mechanic, which may not sound glamorous, but it pays well. What I do in my spare time is probably more interesting to you. I share an apartment with a friend of mine that overlooks Prescott Park. I often go there to jog or bike. Sometimes my roommate and I will join a few friends on the tennis courts or soccer field, although we probably resemble circus clowns more accurately than athletes. On long weekends or vacations I enjoy camping and backpacking. (You mentioned you enjoyed hiking--I have found some excellent trails around Mt. Baker.) I have also traveled abroad a few times, and would love to visit Europe again, or Australia. On weeknights I enjoy going out to hear bands, as well as going to movies. Sometimes I just sit at home or in the park with a good book or magazine.
Hopefully you have found some part of this interesting, and as I obviously didn't cover everything, please ask any questions. I sincerely look forward to hearing back from you.
George Wickham
"You're speechless," Jane noticed a few moments later.
"Well, it was a great letter," said Elizabeth, "Not perfect, but who is? He just sounds very down-to-earth. I never imagined I'd get such a great response. I'm definitely writing back to this one!"
"I think you should write back to both of them," said Jane.
"Are you sure? That first guy..."
"He may just have been rambling because he was so nervous," suggested Jane, "Write back to both of them and then we'll see."
Part 3 Posted on Monday, 12 July 1999
Dear Mr. Collins,Thank you very much for responding to my ad. Your letter was very impressive, but it didn't include very much personal information. I would like to hear more about you. Would you be so kind as to write back? I look forward to hearing from you.
Elizabeth Bennet
Dear Mr. Wickham,I am so glad you responded to my ad! I enjoyed reading your letter and it does seem like we have a lot in common. Would you like to have coffee with me sometime this week? (My phone number is written below.) I would love to get to know you better.
Elizabeth Bennet
To: charlesbingley@pol.com
From: williamdarcy@pol.com
Re: Company PicnicSomehow I was persuaded to hold this year's company picnic at my house. Since there are only about three employees who regularly attend, I figured we could make it a general party. Jane is invited of course, as well as any friends she may want to bring, (maybe one of her sisters?) and your sisters are invited. Ana will be there too, and maybe Rich, if I can persuade him. See you later.
To: lizzybennet@pol.com
From: janebingley@pol.com
Re: Saturday, 5 o'clockWant to come to a party this Saturday? It's at Charles's friend's house. Caroline and Louisa will be there, so he said I could invite you to keep me company. It should be fun, I've heard his house is nice. You remember William Darcy, don't you? He's the groomsman you walked down the aisle with at our wedding.
To: janebingley@pol.com
From: lizzybennet@pol.com
Re: Re: Saturday, 5 o'clockWILLIAM DARCY?!?!? You've got to be joking! I had enough of him at the wedding! Remember how we were paired to walk together at the rehearsal? Well, right before the ceremony he came up and practically demanded that he walk with Caroline instead. I could have cared less who he walked with, but he was so rude. As if I wasn't good enough for him. Well, I didn't want the switch to disrupt the wedding so I put my foot down, and then through the entire ceremony he was sneering at me. I wouldn't go to his house for a million dollars!
P.S. I wrote back to both of my replies. Let's hope Mr. Collins's gets lost in the mail!
Part 4 Posted on Tuesday, 13 July 1999
"Can I ask you something?" George Wickham said between sips of his iced coffee, "Was I the only one who wrote back to your ad? I mean, I've never done anything like that before so I don't know anything about it, and I was just wondering..."
"Of course," smiled Elizabeth, "I didn't know anything about it either. My sister just talked me into it one day. And yes, I did get one other letter, but I haven't met him in person yet. To tell the truth, I haven't really wanted to make the time."
"Well, I hope that doesn't affect me seeing you again," George lowered his voice, "Say, this Saturday?"
"I'd love to!" cried Elizabeth, "No, no, wait. I promised my sister I'd come to a barbecue this Saturday. It's at the house of some bigwig who works with her husband."
"Does your sister always order you around?" asked George, amused.
Elizabeth laughed, "No, not at all. She's totally not like that. She's very sweet, in fact she's my best friend, so when she asks for favors I try and humor her. This time I was really against it since I think the guy holding the party is a total jerk, but Jane convinced me that his house is nice, the people there will be nice, his sister is nice, blah blah blah. Apparently he lives on Pemberley Street."
"Pemberley!" cried George, "What's his name?"
"William Darcy," answered Elizabeth. She watched as George opened his mouth to speak, then closed it, then sighed and closed his eyes.
"What's the matter?"
"Oh, nothing," said George, "It's just that...you see...well, you're right. He is a jerk."
"I had no idea that you knew him," said Elizabeth, "This is a surprise!"
"Well, I don't really know him anymore, but I used to be rather close with him and his family," George began, "His father, Mr. Darcy, was our landlord when I was growing up. It was just my mom and me, so usually money was tight, but Mr. Darcy helped us out a lot. Not with money, because Mom was too proud to accept charity, but it was the things he did. He and Mrs. Darcy would send over a nice potted plant or something to decorate the house with for Mom, or clothes that William had outgrown for me, and we were always invited to their house for holiday dinners and parties. William and I got to be pretty good friends. Well, this whole time property values had been skyrocketing, but Mr. Darcy kept the rent on our house the same as it had been when we moved in. Then came their accident."
"Their accident?" repeated Elizabeth.
"Yes, both Mr. and Mrs. Darcy were tragically killed in a car accident, and ownership of the property passed to William. Almost immediately after the funeral our rent went way, way up. We thought there might be some mistake; maybe William didn't know how to handle the property, or some lawyer was advising him, or something. So, I went to talk to him and sort it all out. He told me to my face that his father had been way too generous to people like us, and if we couldn't pay the rent he'd throw us out in the street. I was shocked, I mean, he'd been my friend since we were kids. Well, of course we couldn't pay, so we were evicted with nowhere to go. Eventually, my mom decided to move back to her hometown where she could live with my aunt, and I chose to stay here and work my way through community college. Now I've got a job and an apartment, and my mom's doing ok, but I haven't seen William since then. I hadn't even heard of him."
George bent his head to stare into his coffee cup. Elizabeth was too astonished to speak.
"I hate to burden you with my sorry story, but I thought you should know," George said quietly a few moments later.
"Oh no, it's not a burden at all," stammered Elizabeth, "Really, I'm glad you told me. I had no idea he was so...so, like that. I'm shocked."
George smiled suddenly, "You look like you just saw a puppy get run over. Maybe to lighten the emotional load we should walk over to the park. One of the summer concerts is going on tonight."
"Sounds great," said Elizabeth, meaning it.
Part 5 Posted on Wednesday, 14 July 1999
To: lizzybennet@pol.com
From: janebingley@pol.com
Re: Re: The DevilI just finished reading your email--it took nearly ten minutes to take everything in. I can't believe that William has such a terrible history. I mean, I have only met him about a dozen times and he seemed somewhat, aloof, I guess, but I never imagined him capable of something as bad as that. I've talked to Charles about it. (Hope you don't mind.) He doesn't know the whole story, but he did know that William and George weren't on friendly terms when they last parted. I hope you're still planning to come to the party despite all this!
Deae Miss Elixabrth Benney,Thanj you so vrry much fir your kins letterr. Unfortynately, one of my hoobbies is bee-leeping and sadily one of myu glovers fell off. Az muy fingers are vrry swolllen and writing is rather painfil, may I be so bolfd as to invite you too mhy humbble abnode? Perhaps next Moinday afternooooon?
Rev. Wiulliam Coplinns
To: janebingley@pol.com
From: lizzybennet@pol.com
Re: PartyOf course I'll still come to the party, I'll just have to be careful and not kill the host!
P.S. I got a letter from Mr. Collins. He's a bee-keeper! And a Reverend!!! I think my correspondence with him is over.
To: charlesbingley@pol.com
From: williamdarcy@pol.com
Re: PartyOk, just to check. Caroline, the Hursts, you & Jane, and her sister Elizabeth are coming? That's six non-employee guests, besides Ana and Rich. If you know of any others please let me know asap.
To: anadarcy@pol.com
From: richardfw@pol.com
Re: PartyYour big brother just called me and went over the guest list for the little shindig this weekend. Wasn't Elizabeth Bennet the girl he was crazy about for two whole months after the Bingley's wedding? If she was, perhaps we can arrange for Mrs. Reynolds to accidentally lock them in the pantry together!
To: richardfw@pol.com
From: anadarcy@pol.com
Re: PartyI'm so glad you wrote to me! I needed cheering up and your emails always make me laugh! Yes, I do believe it was Elizabeth Bennet. Liam doesn't talk to me much about things like that, but he mentioned her so much after the wedding that I was under the impression he had a crush on her, if that's what you can call it. Can't wait to see you at the party!
Part 6 Posted on Thursday, 15 July 1999
"Lizzy! Lizzy, over here!" Jane waved above the small crowd gathered in the backyard at 7 Pemberley Street.
Elizabeth waved back then politely fought her way through the mob. She saw Mr. Hurst near the drinks table, but didn't instantly recognize anyone else near her.
William Darcy noticed the new arrival. His eyes followed her across the lawn and for one blessed moment he completely tuned out what Caroline Bingley was saying to him about his magnificent barbecue skills.
"Hey guys!" Elizabeth smiled when she finally reached her sister and brother-in-law, "I wasn't expecting there to be so many people."
"Well, when the folks at the office heard that the party was at Liam's house, they all decided to come," laughed Charles, "This sure beats where the party was last year."
"Lizzy, I'll introduce you to some people, if you like," said Jane. Elizabeth agreed and they wandered through the crowd.
"That's William, of course, over by the barbecue," Jane pointed out a few moments later, "And the woman looking over his shoulder is Caroline. You remember her?"
"How could I forget?" muttered Elizabeth.
"Then Louisa is over there, and the blond girl sitting next to her is Georgiana Darcy, William's sister. She was at our wedding. She's very nice, but rather shy. You'll have to meet her when she's available..."
"Oh Jane!" Elizabeth whispered suddenly, "I hate to interrupt your excellent tour but I really need to use the bathroom. Could you tell me how to get there?"
Five minutes later, Elizabeth emerged from the bathroom, which was always a useful alibi. A few relaxing moments alone had done the trick. 'Why am I here, making myself miserable?' she thought, 'I could be spending this time with George. No, no, remember I'm here for Jane. I'm supposed to be keeping her company. Some good company I am! Just calm down and be pleasant for Jane's sake. It's only a few hours.'
"Can I help you?" asked a voice. Elizabeth whirled around to see a tall, handsome man that she vaguely recognized smiling down at her.
"Oh, no, I was just admiring this, uh, painting," she stammered, "I didn't realize I had been standing here so long."
"It's very picturesque, isn't it?" he commented, "It's the Darcy's ancestral home in England. Otherwise, I don't know much about it, this was done a long time ago."
"Why aren't you at the party?" asked Elizabeth a few moments later.
"Oh, I don't have any really close friends here and I just felt like rambling around the house alone for a while. I suppose I should ask you the same question."
Elizabeth laughed, "I definitely don't have any friends here, in fact, I hate to say it, but there are a few people here I strongly dislike."
"I have to admit, there are a few unsavory characters here," he smiled, "I can't speak for anyone from the company, but most of the rest of the folks are nice, just a little tiresome. With a few exceptions."
"You're not an employee?" Elizabeth asked.
"No. Aren't you?"
"No."
"Oh, since I didn't know you, I assumed you were," he said, "Since most everyone else is connected to the family."
"The family?"
"Maybe this would be less confusing if I just introduce myself," he laughed, "I'm Richard Fitzwilliam, Liam's cousin."
"I'm Elizabeth Bennet," she said, noting that a funny smile flickered over his face, "My sister Jane is married to Charles Bingley. You were at the wedding, weren't you? I could swear I recognized you from somewhere."
"Yes, I was," he said, concocting a plan, "You know, it's rather stuffy in the house. Would you like to go outside and get a drink?"
"I'd love one," she smiled, thinking to herself that her luck had just changed. The two went back downstairs and outside, where Richard poured two glasses of punch, then led her over to the table where Georgiana Darcy was sitting alone.
"You look rather bored," he said to her. She looked over and smiled.
"I guess I am."
"Well, here's something to amuse you. Ana, may I introduce Elizabeth Bennet, Jane Bingley's sister?"
"Nice to meet you again," said Elizabeth. This Darcy sibling seemed pleasant at least, "I was just inside admiring your beautiful house."
"Thank you," said Ana, "I hope you're enjoying yourself..." She stopped talking just then, trying to make sense of the subtle head-tilting gestures Rich was giving her.
"...Oh, please excuse me. I believe Louisa is motioning for me to come over." She left, glancing back just long enough to receive a 'good job' wink from her cousin.
"Have you met Liam yet?" asked Richard, "Oh, I forgot, he was at the wedding too! Let's go over and say hello anyway."
Elizabeth couldn't think of any polite way to protest, so she followed Richard over to another table.
"Liam, have you met Elizabeth Bennet?"
"Elizabeth Bennet!" William nearly cried, frantically wiping barbecue sauce off his hands, "Oh, hello. I, uh, I'm so happy you made it."
"I'm sure you are," Elizabeth said, trying to disguise her sarcasm, "It's a lovely party."
"Thank you," he said, finally composing himself, "Has Richard given you the grand tour?"
"Sadly, no," Rich smiled, "I thought that was the host's job."
"Would you care to see the house?" William stood and addressed Elizabeth.
"No thank you. Really, I wouldn't want to trouble you."
"It's no trouble."
"No, no trouble at all!" added Richard, trying not to laugh at his cousin's awkwardness.
Thankfully, Jane and Charles wandered over at that moment, both looking suspicious, and the latter wasted no time in getting to the point.
"Jane and I just came up with the most wonderful idea!" he declared, "Since we just finished remodeling our kitchen and living room why don't you all come over after the party is over and see it? We can make some coffee and spend a pleasant hour or two."
"That sounds great," said William, "I've been wanting to see what you've done to the place. I'm sure Ana would love to come too. And you, Rich?" He didn't dare ask Elizabeth, but luckily Jane did.
"I'm afraid I can't," was her answer, "I promised I'd call George when I got home."
"George?" Jane looked puzzled.
"George Wickham," she emphasized the name, "The great letter writer?"
"Oh, of course," Jane didn't sound as happy as she had a moment before. Rich and Liam were clearly affected. Hurting Rich made Elizabeth feel guilty at once, since he seemed to be such a nice guy, but she wanted to make William as uncomfortable as possible.
And he was.
Part 7 Posted on Friday, 16 July 1999
"I love what you've done in here," cooed Caroline, "This kitchen was so run-down when you moved in and now look at it! Oh, I could never live in a place where the fridge didn't have an ice maker and dispenser. I believe the fridge at your house has an ice dispenser, William."
William didn't answer.
'I believe your blood has an ice dispenser,' thought Rich, narrowing his eyes at Caroline.
"And what wonderful color-coordinations you have in here! I redid my apartment in light colors too, you know. Not pastels, because then it looks like a giant Easter egg, but this light sage green and cream are fabulous."
Jane thanked her politely. The after-party party didn't last long.
William followed the moonlight through the backyard to where the picnic tables were still set up. A cool midsummer night's breeze ruffled tree limbs as he passed through the bushier part of the yard and finally into the clearing where the tables were. She had been here.
He sat down and wondered why he was behaving like a middle-schooler. She didn't care that he existed, she was interested in his only true enemy, and, frankly, she wasn't good enough for him. But he still couldn't shake her out of his head. Why was she so cold toward him? What had he ever done to her? William's mind was spinning in circles.
At that hour Elizabeth's mind was also preoccupied with someone from the party. She had tossed and turned in bed for nearly two hours, but every time she closed her eyes she saw Rich's face in front of her. Oh, why had she gone and mentioned George in front of him? Why had she ever placed that stupid ad anyway? Hadn't she just met an incredibly nice guy on her own? And now what was she supposed to do? Forget George? Forget Rich? Finally, she decided she'd try to talk to Rich about why George's name had offended him. She could apologize, and take things from there...
Richard was also awake. He could see how Elizabeth Bennet had bewitched his cousin. She seemed bright, witty, and definitely beautiful. So how had she fallen for a sleaze like George Wickham? Well, he could make himself look better than he actually was, Rich supposed. But something had to be done. If only William would give him permission to describe the Wickham-Georgiana incident to Elizabeth, she might see him for what he really was. Better yet, if William would tell her himself...but that wasn't very likely.
William was beginning to feel the chill of the night, and decided to go in the house. As he walked toward the door, one phrase suddenly popped into his head.
"The great letter writer?"
"What letter?" William said out loud to himself. Were they pen pals? People didn't usually meet that way unless it was through..."
"It's just that Jane said she finally persuaded her sister to write a personal ad, and I was trying to see if I could find it..."
"Oh no!" whispered William to himself as he realized what was going on, "I've got to get that letter back!"
Part 8 Posted on Sunday, 18 July 1999
Mrs. Reynolds was a very prim, proper, middle aged woman. The fact that she worked for a very wealthy family had never gone to her head. She walked briskly down the sidewalk, smiling pleasantly at people passing by, but was constantly concentrating on her mission.
At the corner, she stopped. She took a notepad and pencil out of her purse and bent over slightly to examine the mailbox. She nodded once as she wrote down the information her master had requested, and double checked it, of course. Then, with the same quick step, she twirled around and returned home.
"The mail is picked up daily at 10 am," Mrs. Reynolds reported a few minutes later, "Except today, because it's Sunday."
"Thank you," said William, despairingly. The letter was gone. Now there was nothing to do but wait. Elizabeth Bennet was not one to keep silent when she felt strongly about something, so he knew he'd hear about it when the letter arrived.
"You sound disappointed. Did you miss a deadline or something? I could always arrange to send something Express Delivery."
"No, no thank you Mrs. Reynolds," said William, trying to hide his worry, "I was merely curious."
"Well, there were some letters for you in the mailbox, sir, that I forgot to pick up yesterday," said Mrs. Reynolds, handing over a considerable stack of mail, "Maybe this will cheer you up." Her duties completed, she left the room.
William wasn't interested in mail. The last thing he wanted to think about was mail! But the letter on top with the elaborate handwriting caught his attention.
Dearest William,You naughty boy, your summer visit is long past due! Anne and I are simply desolate without you and my other dear nephew, Richard. You must come over as soon as possible. But not this week for I am simply too busy with book signings and other tiresome events. Surely you've heard of my success with How to Succeed in (Everybody's) Business Without Really Trying. It is wonderful to feel that I am improving lives, but it is so disruptive to my own. Do call and tell Mrs. Jenkinson when you are coming. We do so long for your company.
Your Devoted Aunt,
Catherine De Bourgh
Needless to say, the letter made William feel worse.
Dear Elizabeth,Hey! How's your summer going? Well, I just wanted to let you know that I am going to be in town for a few weeks. I just arrived and I'm staying with my sister, Maria, and her roommates. I hope you'll come over and visit sometime! The house is very nice, except the guy next door keeps bees so we can't go in the backyard. Talk to you later!
Charlotte Lucas
Part 9 Posted on Monday, 19 July 1999
In which we dispose of Rev. Collins, and Charlotte proves you can't pull the wool over her eyes...
"Elizabeth! I didn't expect to see you so soon! Oh, quick, come in before the bees can!"
Charlotte pulled her friend into the house and quickly shut the door. Once the friendly greetings were over, they sat down in the kitchen.
"Can I get you anything?" asked Charlotte, "A drink?"
"No, no, I'm fine," said Elizabeth, "I hope you didn't have any plans for today. I just received your letter this morning and..."
"Oh, it's fine!" smiled Charlotte, "Really, this works out wonderfully. Maria and her friends are out so I was a little bored. How have you been?"
"Pretty good," replied Elizabeth, "How about you?"
Charlotte went on to explain how she had spent the first few weeks of summer, and then Elizabeth shared about placing the ad, and its results.
"I remember William Darcy," said Charlotte, "He did some business once with my father. He was sort of reserved, but he seemed decent. Are you sure this George is telling you the truth?"
"He must be," said Elizabeth, "When I mentioned his name at the party, William got upset."
"I just don't know if you can trust someone you've just met," sighed Charlotte, "Well, let's not worry about it now. Didn't you say you had an errand to do this afternoon?"
"Yes, and believe it or not it's with your neighbor."
"The bee man?" exclaimed Charlotte.
"Yep. He was the other one who wrote back to my ad. He invited me over to meet him, but I think I'm just going to somehow let him know I'm not available anymore."
"Well, he can't be any worse than that Wickham character."
"Charlotte!"
"I'm sorry, but what can I say? Something about his story just doesn't sound right to me. Why would he go to the trouble of telling that long sad story to someone he'd just met? It sounds fishy."
"Let's not talk about it anymore," said Elizabeth, "Would you like to come next door with me?"
"Two charming young ladies in my house! I'm quite enraptured!"
Charlotte and Lizzy sat down on a small sofa facing the chair in which sat William Collins. He was almost as Elizabeth had pictured him. He had somewhat unruly light brown hair, a goofy smile, and his right hand was bandaged so much that it appeared to be about three times its normal size.
"I believe you wanted to know more about me, Elizabeth. I studied two years at..."
"Actually, I'm afraid I have some rather bad news," Elizabeth wanted to stop his forthcoming speech but wasn't sure exactly what to say, "Um, I had already received a letter by the time you wrote me, and..."
"Say no more!" he declared, to both the girl's surprise, "You don't need to make excuses. I understand completely. You see, when it comes to ladies, I flatter myself, I believe I know exactly what you're saying."
"You do?" cried Elizabeth.
"My dear, you don't need to be ashamed. How inconsiderate of me not to realize that you probably would feel inferior to the standards that Mrs. De Bourgh set for me! It was most certainly not my intention to make you feel ill at ease. I humbly apologize."
"Uh, thank you," Elizabeth couldn't quite believe where this conversation had gone.
"And now, Miss Bennet, and Miss Lucas, my charming neighbor," Mr. Collins was finally forced to take a breath, "Thank you so much for this visit."
As they hurried out of the bee-ridden yard, Charlotte laughed, "I think he dumped you."
Part 10 Posted on Thursday, 22 July 1999
Elizabeth arrived home to a completely darkened house that evening. She unlocked the front door, fumbled around for the light switch, then noticed a note on the table near the door.
Gone to the Phillips's. (Pray for me!) Dad
Next to the note was a thin stack of mail. Lizzy rifled through a few pieces of junk mail before noticing another letter from the Gazette.
'Another response,' she thought, 'I wonder why it came so much later than the others?'
The next morning, Elizabeth didn't even bother to consult Jane about her latest letter. She drove to 7 Pemberley Street, stormed up the walkway, and impatiently rang the bell.
"Yes?" Mrs. Reynolds was as cool and collected as ever.
"I'd like to speak to Mr. Darcy, please," Elizabeth tried to say calmly.
"He's just getting ready to leave. Are you expected?"
"No, but I wanted to catch him before he left for work."
"Well, please come in," Mrs. Reynolds opened the door wider so she could pass, then led her into a comfortable sitting room, "I'll send Mr. Darcy in. May I take your name?"
"Elizabeth Bennet."
From the kitchen, Darcy heard her arrival. A lesser man would have bolted out the back door.
"A girl named Elizabeth Bennet is here to see you," Mrs. Reynolds announced as she entered the kitchen, "She's waiting for you in the front room."
William thanked her and headed down the hall. He could hear her menacingly tapping her fingernails on the coffee table. If a lesser man hadn't already run for it, he certainly would have now.
"Good morning," William bravely entered the room, "This is an unexpected surprise."
"This is an unexpected surprise!" she glared at him as she held up the letter, "What, did you think I'd just throw myself at your feet when I read it?"
"No," he said calmly, "I didn't even know who I was writing to."
In her fury Elizabeth hadn't thought of that, but she quickly retorted, "What does it matter? A jerk like you has no business writing to anybody!"
"And what right do you have to call me a jerk?"
"I know all about you, Mr. Darcy! Yes, that surprises you, doesn't it? Everyone sees you as this wonderful, hard-working businessman, even though you never say a word, but I know the truth about you. I know about your cruelty."
"My cruelty?" William was truly baffled.
"Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about," exclaimed Elizabeth, "George Wickham told me all about you."
"Oh, that's a credible source," muttered Darcy.
"How can you say things like that? George isn't a rich snob like you; he struggles just to make ends meet. How can you just stand there and laugh at his misfortunes?"
"His misfortunes!" spat William sarcastically, "Yes, his misfortunes have been great indeed!"
"And you caused them!" cried Lizzy, "Are you so completely incapable of feeling shame, or guilt? Don't you care?"
"I care that this is how you see me," William said thoughtfully, almost to himself, "By his account I must look like a monster. I wonder why you're so eager to trust him."
"Oh, so you insult me again?" Elizabeth raised her voice even more.
"I've already injured your precious George, so why should I bother insulting you?" he sneered, "And what do you mean by 'again?' You hardly ever speak to me."
"Surely you remember Jane's wedding, when I wasn't good enough to walk down the aisle with you."
William thought that was about the farthest thing from the truth he'd ever heard!
"I wasn't as elegant as Caroline!" continued Elizabeth, tossing her head in Caroline's fashion.
"You don't speak very warmly of your sister-in-law," said Darcy. Elizabeth ignored that comment.
"If some other girl were to have received this letter, I would pity her. You may look like a gentleman, but you certainly don't act like one," she sighed disgustedly, "Oh, I've had enough of you!" She hurried to the front door.
"The feeling is almost mutual," William called after her.
Part 11
William purposely avoided his co-workers as he hurried into his office and shut the door. He collapsed into the chair and wasn't even able to remember driving to work. Elizabeth's words kept repeating themselves in his head. As if to add to his agony, the phone rang.
"Liam, you're finally there! It's Rich."
"Rich, I really can't talk right now," William said as he rubbed one hand over his forehead.
"But it's about Elizabeth Bennet," said Rich, "Look, I really think..."
"Elizabeth Bennet is the last person I want to hear about right now. I really have to go."
"But..."
"Please, I'll talk to you later."
William hung up quickly, only to have the phone ring again.
"Leave me alone! I said I'd call you later!" boomed William. A sniff came from the other end.
"Well, that certainly was not very polite," said Mrs. Catherine De Bourgh.
"I'm sorry, Aunt Catherine," said William, "But I really can't talk at the moment."
"What, you're too busy to talk to your dear auntie? I simply had to call and tell you that I've finally gotten that hideous publisher off my back, so you can come as soon as possible! Isn't that good news?"
"Fabulous," William groaned.
"It will be an excellent vacation for you. You sound very tired. Plus, you can meet our new minister, or pastor, or whatever he is. A charming little man. It's so wonderful to have someone who does exactly as I wish all the time. It's quite convenient."
"I'm sure it is," said William, still unenthusiastic.
"My my, William, you do sound ill. When you come over I'll have Mrs. Jenkinson fix you some green tea. It does wonders, you know. I wrote all about it in my book..."
"Have you talked to Rich about all this?"
"Oh, no. Not yet. But he doesn't keep such a busy schedule as you do. I will call him this afternoon. That should give him enough time to pack for tomorrow morning."
"Tomorrow?!?"
"Yes, tomorrow! We have your rooms all ready! Oh, Mrs. Metcalf is here. Good-bye, dear!"
Unlike William, who had stormed out of the house, Elizabeth took her time getting home. She had tried to put the spiteful William out of her mind, but the thought of going home was still unbearable. She couldn't go to Jane's or Charlotte's in such a state, so she kept driving. It seemed to calm her tormented mind. Eventually she stopped and rambled for a while through a sunny, peaceful park.
When she arrived home, Kitty and Lydia were in the living room watching tv.
"Want to watch this with us, Lizzy?" asked Kitty.
"No thanks, I have a headache."
"We'll turn it off then," laughed Lydia, pushing the button on the remote, "We went shopping this morning. We would have asked you to come but you were gone so long. Guess who we saw?"
"She'll never guess," giggled Kitty.
"Who?" asked Elizabeth.
"She doesn't sound like she really wants to know," said Kitty.
"No, she sounds like she's just trying to humor us to shut us up," added Lydia, "Well, we just won't tell her then!"
"Just tell me!" insisted Elizabeth, who was tired of their games.
"The guy in the picture you have on your desk."
"George?"
"Yes, that was the name Mary King was whispering in his ear," laughed Kitty.
"M...Mary King?" Elizabeth stammered.
"Yes," smiled Kitty, "She has an even worse reputation than Lydia!"
"Shut up!" Lydia cried, throwing a sofa pillow at her unfortunate sister, "Actually, Lizzy, she does have a bad reputation, but who cares about that? Not George! They looked like they were having a very good time shopping."
"A very cozy time!" added Kitty.
Elizabeth could hear their giggling escalate as she ran up the stairs. She could hardly believe what was going on. George and a girl like Mary King? How could he do something like that? But then the thought struck her--someone who could do something like that could lie. What a mess!
Part 12
"Thanks again for letting me stay here a few days, Maria. I couldn't stand being at home much longer," said Elizabeth.
"I told you, it's our pleasure," smiled Maria, "I know Lydia, remember? I think I would have left long ago!"
"And it's lucky that Trish has gone camping, so you could use her room," added Charlotte.
"She didn't mind at all," agreed Maria, "Oh, we'd better hurry if we're going to dinner! I've got to change my clothes."
"So this is at the home of the Mrs. De Bourgh, huh? The bee man was always singing her praises."
"He's going to be there," said Maria.
"No!"
"Yep, him and two of Mrs. De Bourgh's nephews. I don't know why she wants us there too."
"Probably to 'succeed in our business without really trying,'" laughed Elizabeth.
"I didn't know she had any nephews," said Charlotte, "I thought her only family was that weird daughter."
"No, there's two nephews and a niece, I think," said Maria, "And they are just as well-to-do as she is. I met one of them, Richard, the last time he came to visit. The other one lives on Pemberley Street."
Elizabeth was so horrified she couldn't speak.
"Well, hurry up!" cried Maria, "We'll be late!"
Earlier that day a car had pulled up at Mrs. De Bourgh's house.
"Well, this is it. The end of the road. The final stop. There's no turning back now," sighed Rich.
Both he and William looked up with despair at the tall gates which blocked Mrs. De Bourgh's driveway. A uniformed man appeared out of nowhere and opened them, and they slowly drove up to the house. Their cousin, Anne, was standing on the front porch, and as they came closer, she appeared to fling something into the bushes.
"Hello, Anne," Rich greeted her as they carried their duffel bags up to the front door, "Why is there steam coming out of that bush?"
"How should I know?" she retorted crossly. Anne and Richard had never been the best of friends.
"Naughty girl, what will your mother say when she finds out you've taken up smoking again?"
"Go to...!"
"Aah, let's just go into the house, Rich, ok?" William interrupted, "Nice to see you, Anne."
Mrs. De Bourgh was waiting for her nephews in her incredibly fashionable living room. The walls were practically oozing dollar bills.
"William! Richard!" she held a hand out to each of them, "I am so glad you have finally come to see me! Life around here has gotten so mundane..."
"Surely not here, Aunt Catherine. I'm sure my life would never lack excitement if I lived here," smiled Rich.
'Suck up,' thought William, 'That's the worst acting I ever saw.'
"That is sweet of you to say. And heaven knows things have been going on every single day. I had to hold a dinner party for my publisher and his wife, and my editor and her husband! It was an infinite load of trouble, but I dare say they have never eaten better ribs in their life. It was my own special recipe."
"You always did have a way with pigs, Aunt," said Rich.
'Oh please!' thought William.
"You are very silent today," she addressed him, "You must be tired from your journey."
"Oh no, it's only across town, Aunt Catherine."
"Nevertheless, I can tell when someone looks ill. I promised you green tea, didn't I? Well, you shall have it this very minute!" She stood up.
"No, don't trouble yourself. I can have some before I go to bed," insisted William.
Mrs. De Bourgh did not seem displeased, "In that case, I shall tell you both about the exciting plans we have for this evening. The wonderful little man who lives down the street is going to join us for dinner. And his neighbor. I made it my business to find out about her as soon as she moved in, but now she has a sister and a friend staying with her, and I simply had to invite them too to find all about them. We can't have the wrong kind of people in this neighborhood, you know."
Rich shook his head, "Certainly not."
"So you two may help me investigate them. I doubt you know the Miss Lucases already?"
"It doesn't ring a bell," said Rich.
"And a Miss Elizabeth Bennet?"
"Uh, can I have that green tea now?" William groaned.
Part 13
William stared down at the very expensive oriental rug, wishing it would split in half and swallow him. He lifted his eyes and saw Rich staring at him.
"Well, they're fashionably late," sniffed Mrs. De Bourgh. She disappeared into the dining room.
"Liam, about Elizabeth," Richard took the opportunity to whisper, "I think you ought to talk to her about Wickham. He must just be using her."
"Rich, it's none of my business," William whispered back, "Besides, she made it very clear she's on his side. Apparently he told her everything."
"What?" Rich exclaimed, then remembered himself and lowered his voice, "What do you mean? I can't imagine him coming out and saying, 'By the way, I've just come home from trying to kidnap a fifteen year old,' and Elizabeth falling at his feet."
"Well what am I supposed to do?" cried William.
"What are you two talking about?" Mrs. De Bourgh called from the other room.
"Just business," William quickly called back.
"Look," continued Rich, "Just tell her the truth about Wickham. If she doesn't believe you, tell her to talk to me."
"I can't tell her that," said Liam quietly.
"Then let me tell her," said Rich, "I don't know why she's so mad at you but she seems friendly enough toward me."
Just then the doorbell rang, and Mrs. De Bourgh hurried into the hall.
"Do whatever you want," Liam whispered back quickly, trying to prepare himself for who was on the other side of the door.
It was Rev. Collins.
"Oh Mrs. De Bourgh, a thousand apologies," he panted. His body shook as he took great breaths of air.
"What on earth is the matter with you?" she demanded, "Where are my guests?"
"Forgive me," he said weakly, "Charlotte Lucas's car broke down, so I offered them my humble vehicle, but sadly," he paused to take a deep breath, "It only seats three. So I ran on ahead to tell you they would unfortunately be late."
"Thank you," said Mrs. De Bourgh, ignoring his exhausted state. Her only feeling at the moment was annoyance at the tardiness of the other guests.
Just then a scream came from the kitchen.
"What the..." muttered Rich. He and William hurried to find out what was going on, leaving a temperamental Aunt and a panting Reverend on the doorstep.
They ran into the kitchen, only to be choked by the great cloud of smoke that was swirling out from the oven. Mrs. Jenkinson had opened the back door and was trying to wave smoke out with a towel, while the unfortunate cook sat outside in the fresh air, sobbing.
"What happened in here?" exclaimed William.
"Oh, gentlemen!" cried Mrs. Jenkinson when she spotted them, "There was a slight accident with the soufflé. But it's all right now, just a little smoke."
"The dinner is ruined!" wailed the cook.
"There there, we'll think of something," said Mrs. Jenkinson kindly.
"What's going on in here?" boomed Mrs. De Bourgh as she entered the room, "Who is responsible for this?"
"There was just an accident, Aunt Catherine," said Rich, "Everyone is all right, but I'm afraid the dinner is ruined."
"Oh how vexing!" she exclaimed, stamping her foot, "Well, it seems that our little party tonight just wasn't meant to be. Richard, instruct Rev. Collins to run back and tell his neighbors not to come. We'll postpone our dinner until tomorrow."
William was relieved, and Rich could see it in his face.
"Will do, Aunt Catherine," he said as he went back to the front door where Rev. Collins had just caught his breath, "There was a slight problem in the kitchen, so my aunt regrets we'll have to put off dinner until tomorrow. She wondered if you could inform the ladies."
"Certainly, certainly!" Rev. Collins tried to sound gallant despite his exhaustion, "I'll just run back and tell them. Thank you, sir."
"Actually, if you don't mind, I'll go back with you. I'd like to have a chance to talk to Miss Bennet."
Part 14
Rev. Collins gave one final burst of speed as he darted past the bees and into his house. Rich guessed that the moment the door was closed he had fallen panting on the floor. Chuckling, he continued to the next house.
"Oh dear," said Maria as she opened the door, "I'm so sorry we're late! We were just about to leave."
"No no, it's all right," said Rich, "My aunt sent me and Rev. Collins to tell you that she's postponed dinner until tomorrow."
"Oh!" said Maria, relieved. Then she peered around outside.
"Oh, Rev. Collins went home, if that's what you're wondering," Rich smiled.
Maria laughed uneasily, "Yes, well, won't you come in?"
"Thank you," said Rich, entering the house, "I must admit, I had another errand here. I'm supposed to deliver a message to Elizabeth."
"She's upstairs. I'll just run and get her!"
Maria hurried upstairs to Charlotte's room where she and Elizabeth were searching for a delinquent shoe, which had been the second cause of their tardiness.
"Elizabeth, Mrs. De Bourgh's nephew is here. Richard. He wants to talk to you," whispered Maria.
"Thanks," said Elizabeth, "Will you take my place in the great search?"
"Oh, that doesn't matter. He said dinner's been postponed until tomorrow."
"Well I've still got to find my shoe!" cried Charlotte.
Elizabeth laughed and went downstairs to the living room where Rich had seated himself, "Hi. I'm sorry about dinner."
"Oh, it wasn't your fault," said Rich, "There was a slight problem in the kitchen."
"Well, that's just as well," murmured Elizabeth.
"Am I right in guessing that you weren't looking forward to this dinner party very much?" asked Rich.
Elizabeth nodded.
"And am I right in guessing that William was the cause?"
"No."
Rich was surprised, to say the least.
"I was the cause," said Elizabeth, "I'm sure he told you about how I barged into his house yelling and screaming. See, I thought that I had good reason to. My fr...uh, George, had told me about how William had treated him in the past, and it enraged me. Then when I got his letter, I just had to go tell him what I thought of him. But then yesterday, after all that happened, I went home and my sisters told me that they'd seen George at the mall with a, er, a girl with a very bad reputation. So then I assumed that he'd told me a pack of lies. I was so...embarrassed. I couldn't believe what I'd just done."
"I understand," said Rich quietly, "I don't know what George told you, but I'm sure it's not true, or at least not both sides of the story. Will you do something? Will you talk to Liam about this?"
"I'm sure he's heard enough from me," said Elizabeth uneasily.
"I think you'd be surprised," said Rich, "I think he'd be more than happy to explain his history with George to you. Will you go talk to him? I'm sure he'd like to resolve this too."
"Well, if you're sure he'll see me. I certainly made a fool of myself."
"I can promise you he'll see you. And now, if you'll excuse me and my growling stomach, we'll head home and see if the kitchen has been repaired," he rose and headed for the door.
"Repaired!? I thought you said there was only a slight problem."
"Oh well, it's nothing a new oven won't fix. I'll see you later!"
Elizabeth wished him farewell.
As Rich returned to Mrs. De Bourgh's house, he was slightly startled to see a person in a leather jacket climbing out a second story window via the various trellises and vines that encompassed the house. He arrived at the side of the house at the same time the person landed on the ground.
"Tsk tsk, Anne, the front door is much less dangerous. Let me show you," he securely grabbed her arm and walked to the front of the house.
"Let go of me!" she cried, struggling.
"You seem to be having a hard time walking. Maybe if I take this heavy pack of cigarettes out of your pocket it'll lighten your step."
"Jerk! Leave me alone!" she tried to pull the pack out of his hands.
"Now that's enough," said Rich firmly, "Stop flailing around and come inside, and you're going to hand these over to your mother."
"I think you missed out, Rich," laughed William half an hour later when the chaos had ended, "You look like you were born to be a policeman."
"Nah, conspiracy is more my thing," he answered with a mysterious smile.
Part 15
Dear Ana,I hope you're not getting too bored at home. Believe me, I would come back this very minute if I could. But Rich and I have promised to stay a whole week and only one day has gone by! Remember you can always call Charles and Jane if you need company.
It hasn't been completely un-entertaining here. Yesterday was actually pretty funny. Our dinner caught on fire and the whole kitchen was full of smoke. It sounds more serious than it was--no terrible damage done and nobody hurt. Then Anne tried to sneak out her bedroom window and Rich caught her. He immediately turned her in to our aunt, who was very mad. But do you know how she inflicts her punishments? She commanded Anne to read one of the books she wrote! Personally I'd rather have a life sentence...
Just then the doorbell rang, and a moment later Rich called, "Liam, visitor for you!"
William put the letter aside and hurried downstairs. Rich was waiting for him in the doorway to the living room, and he whispered, "Isn't it a good thing our aunt's not here?"
William understood as he entered the room. Elizabeth Bennet was sitting on the sofa. He turned around and to Rich for an explanation, but Rich had disappeared.
"I hope I wasn't wrong to come here," said Elizabeth, "I just wanted to apologize for our conversation the other day, and I was hoping, that is, Rich said I should ask you about George."
William was insanely happy, but didn't show it, "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"I found out some things about him," replied Elizabeth, "I feel so stupid for trusting him...but I won't waste your time with that. Can you tell me about him?"
"Yes," said William a moment later, "But I must ask...It's somewhat painful for me and other people in my family. You will keep it to yourself?"
"Of course," said Elizabeth sincerely.
"Where to begin," muttered William, "Well, I met George when we were both just kids. My father owned several houses and he rented one of them to George's mother. She was a very nice person, but not very responsible. She kind of drifted from job to job. My parents, however, always were very generous and tried to help her along. Her rent was often late, but my father was very patient and always said that if he ever had to evict them it would be very hard for him. We had them over for dinner many times and so I got to know George. We played together, and my father even took us fishing once.
"A few years ago both my parents were killed in a car accident, and in my father's will he left the property to me. By that time George's mother had moved to live with a relative and he was renting the house on his own. I visited him a couple times, and the house was disgusting. He had trash all over the place, there were stains on the rugs, and there was even a hole in a door he had kicked. I told him it was my responsibility to have everything fixed, but that it would come out of his deposit. He got furious about it and I wasn't going to deal with him if he was out of control, so I left. After that he stopped paying his rent, so I had no choice but to kick him out. I thought that was the last I'd see of him.
"Last summer, my sister, Ana, went on a camping trip with some other students from her school. The leader, Mrs. Younge, hired George as a guide. One day he offered to show her something interesting in the woods, a nest or something, and since she knew him she trusted him and went along. They were missing for several days..."
Here he broke off. Elizabeth, who had been listening intently, said quietly, "You don't need to go on."
"No no," William smiled ruefully, "This is the best part. George had led her around for several hours, before proclaiming them lost. They stumbled across an abandoned cabin and he said that they should wait there for someone to find them. After two days nobody came, so George said he'd try to find the way back and he told Ana to wait there for him. Ana, however, has the Darcy brains and she decided to find a way on her own. She could faintly see some smoke from another campsite and decided to check it out. Just to make sure, though, she cut up some string she had and tied it around trees and bushes as she went, so she could find her way back to the cabin if necessary. The fire she saw turned out to be from the rest of Mrs. Younge's group; they weren't even a quarter of a mile away. She joined them and explained what had happened. When George returned to the cabin, he was shocked, of course, but he followed her trail to the group's campsite and claimed they had been lost the whole time. When the group returned home the next day Ana told us all about it and I was just grateful she was safe. Rich and I even thanked George for taking care of her.
"The big surprise came two days later when we received a ransom note, demanding a large amount of money in return for Ana. I realized then that he hadn't gotten lost, he had been trying to kidnap her, but since she had escaped it hadn't worked. So, I went to talk to him. Looking back I wish I had turned him in to the police, but for some reason I still felt compassion for him from the time my father was alive. And besides, Ana was safe and we didn't need the publicity. I went to him and he admitted the whole plan. He had meant to get back at me. Mrs. Younge had even been directed not to alert the park rangers when they went missing. I told him he was to have nothing to do with anyone in my family ever again, and if he did I would hand the note over to the police. He agreed, and I haven't seen him since."
"Everything all right?" Rich timidly peeked into the room.
"Yes," said Elizabeth, "Thank you so much for suggesting that I should come over. William, I am so sorry for everything that happened to Ana, and for yelling at you the other day. Thank you for telling me all this. I can't believe I ever fell for...well, I'm sorry."
"It's all right," he smiled.
"Going back now?" asked Rich, "I'll walk you home if you like."
"Oh no, that's ok," said Lizzy, "Thanks anyway."
"Well, see you later," said Rich.
"Thanks for coming," William added, "See you at dinner!"
She turned and smiled at him, "Yeah, see you at dinner."
Rich walked her to the door, then came back to the living room chuckling, "Boy, I wouldn't want to be in George's shoes about now."
"Nope," said William, "For once my own shoes are feeling pretty darn comfortable."
Ana's crumpled letter was thrown into the wastebasket as William took a clean piece of paper and wrote:
Dear Ana,You wouldn't believe it, but I am actually starting to enjoy my visit here...
Part 16
"Now we definitely can't be late for dinner tonight!" declared Maria as she rushed around getting ready, "That would just be terrible!"
"I think Mrs. De Bourgh would have us banished from the neighborhood at once!" smiled Charlotte.
"Don't laugh, I'm serious," said Maria, "I was so nervous when her nephew came to the door yesterday. Of course it didn't help that besides being wealthy he is extremely good looking."
"Ewww, you would not believe what Rev. Collins had in his car!" cried Lizzy as she came into the house, "One of his old hand bandages!"
"Gross!" exclaimed Maria.
"I'm having second thoughts about getting in that car now," laughed Charlotte, "Well don't just stand there, Lizzy, throw that disgusting thing away!"
"Your friend seems to be a genteel, pretty girl, Charlotte," Mrs. De Bourgh noted at dinner, "But she is not touching her salmon."
"I'm afraid seafood doesn't quite agree with me, Mrs. De Bourgh," said Elizabeth, wishing she didn't have to discuss such a topic at dinner.
"What? Why didn't you tell me? I'll have Mrs. Jenkinson get you some chicken or something."
"Oh no, it's all right. I'm enjoying this salad very much."
"Salad! You can't just live off salad! I'm very much against girls nowadays dieting so much and not getting the proper nutrients. I can suggest a very excellent exercise program for lowering your weight, Elizabeth."
"Thank you," muttered Elizabeth, who was now completely humiliated.
"Of course, there are some people who can maintain an ideal weight quite easily. Anne, for instance, has nothing to worry about in that respect."
All eyes turned toward Anne's stringy, long blond hair and pasty complexion. She seemed annoyed at the attention.
After dinner, Mrs. De Bourgh grilled Elizabeth about her family, schooling, and general life story. The only thing that seemed to please her was hearing about Elizabeth taking Spanish classes.
"Aah, but have you actually been to Spain? I have! I simply couldn't stay away from their fabulous architecture. I'm thinking of writing a book on it. In fact, I patterned the courtyard after the Alhambra. Rich, take Elizabeth out and show her."
They gratefully departed. The courtyard was beautiful, but Elizabeth felt it didn't fit in with the colonial style of the house.
"What do you think of our aunt?" asked Rich.
"Well, I'm now looking forward to being an old, rich woman who can say exactly what she wants," smiled Elizabeth.
"At least you have a sense of humor. Some people have left that dining room in tears."
"I believe it!" giggled Lizzy, "She practically told me I ought to look more like Anne. That would make anyone cry!"
They were laughing hysterically when William arrived.
"What's so funny?" he inquired.
"We were just discussing Aunt Catherine," smiled Rich, "And her incredible way with words."
"Oh yes," William sighed, "I'm sorry she was so rude."
"It's fine," said Elizabeth, "At the time I wanted to run away, but it gave us something to laugh about."
"It certainly did!" said Rich, "Say, Liam, why aren't you in there receiving more of Aunt Catherine's sage advice?"
William just rolled his eyes.
"In that case, I'll go back before she decides to join us," said Rich, "Besides, the Lucases may need rescuing, from Aunt Catherine or Rev. Collins."
Before either could protest, Rich darted into the house, but he did not return to the living room. Instead, he tip-toed into the study and hastily grabbed a piece of paper and a pen.
Ana,Remember how we suspected Liam liked Elizabeth Bennet? Well, I've done the dirty work. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to finish this up. Must run. More soon,
Rich
Part 17
Ana Darcy placed the two letters next to each other, one from William and the other from Rich, and compared them. It seemed that one answered the questions the other had raised in her mind.
'Ok Rich, what on earth am I supposed to do?' she thought, 'I'm not very imaginative when it comes to this stuff.'
Rich,What exactly am I supposed to "finish up?" Details please!
Ana
"Please leave a message at the beep," whined the answering machine, "Hi Elizabeth, it's George. I hadn't heard from you in a while so I thought I'd give you a call. Maybe we can do something this weekend. Well, call me later. Bye!"
"The snake!" cried Kitty, "You'd think he'd have his hands full with Mary King. Just erase that one, Lydia."
Lydia was laughing, "What a joke! Who does this guy think he's fooling?" She replayed the message and laughed even louder.
"Lydia, what are you doing? Just erase it. Lizzy won't want it."
"Well maybe I do!"
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm going to call him back," she laughed, "I can mimic Lizzy's voice pretty well. Look, I'll call him back and pretend to be Lizzy. We'll set up a date and then she won't show up. Won't that be funny?"
"I don't think it's a good idea, Lydia," Kitty frowned, "Besides, your imitation isn't as good as you think it is."
"Shut up!" cried Lydia, "It is so! Just imagine his face when he gets stood up! I wish I could be there...say, maybe I could be there."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'll set up a date at a restaurant or something and then I'll go watch him. I bet he'll get pretty upset!"
"Lydia, just drop it. It's a bad idea."
"Fine," pouted Lydia, "You don't have to have anything to do with it. I'll set it up all by myself!" She grabbed the cordless phone and ran into her room.
Kitty hurried after her, only to find the door locked, "Lydia! Open this door! Lydia!"
Ana,Sorry I left out the important parts in my last letter. I was in a hurry. And since we're coming home in two days I'll probably just wait and explain everything in person. Let's just say that things between Liam and Elizabeth are looking up. Today he actually told Aunt Catherine that he had enjoyed his visit! Now if that isn't progress I don't know what is!