Jump to new as of February 22, 1999
Jump to new as of July 12, 1999
Chapter One
Author's note: I have for a while now wondered if it were possible for a story to be written reversing the sexes in a retelling of Pride and Prejudice, and, possible or not, I have decided to attempt it. I have tried to keep the names relatively similar, e.g. Charlotte=Charley, Elizabeth=Elijah, Jane=Jake, Mary=Mark, Kitty=Keith, and Lydia=Larry. It the case of Ms. Bingley, though, I decided to simply interpose her own name.
It is not a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a husband. Not in the nineties, at any rate. So when a young woman bought the big house at the end of Netherfield Lane, it was not an event to raise undue curiosity amongst the neighborhood.
Still, as rumors tend to spread over fence posts and grocery lines, there slowly excited a general wish amongst the people of the town to get to know her better. Her name was Ms. Caroline Bingley, she had five brothers, and she had come down from Minnesota with a large inherited fortune, for her father was very high up the ladder in a competitive telecommunications company.
Soon enough this news was heard by the ears of Charley Lucas, a dependable, steady sort of man in his late twenties, who had worked hard through his life but had not much to show for it. He lived alone, which was rather sad, in a small house on Longbourn Street; but his family lived nearby, and were continually visiting him. In fact, on this occasion, his sister Maria had come by to drop off a belt sander borrowed by her husband, and with her brought the news of Ms. Bingley's purchase.
"I suppose it's a good thing," he conjectured, "Seeing as the house had stood empty for so long. We all thought that no one who could afford it would really want to live here."
Maria frowned. "I see nothing wrong with Hertford. It's a lovely little suburb!"
"Of course it is," Charley agreed in a hurry, "But it is so far out into the country. It's got that reputation of being a hick town."
"Chuck, a forty-five minute drive from San Diego is hardly an uncivilized wilderness. You exaggerate. And besides, I think that's what Caroline wanted, to get away from it all, and ride her horses. We're throwing a party for her, you know, at the country club."
Charley merely shrugged, feigning disinterestedness, but he was wanting to know why this rich woman should choose to live in Hertford, of all places. After Maria left he crossed the street and rang the bell of the house where his best friend, Elijah Bennet, was staying.
Elijah was one year older than Charley, but the two had been friends since childhood, and although their friendship was at the beginning a matter of propinquity, the two had gone through a lot together. Charley's parents had moved up to Oregon, so eight years ago he took the house as his own. Elijah, however, lived in a condo in San Diego.
Disappointing circumstances had brought Elijah Bennet and his older brother Jake back to Longbourn Street; it looked very much as if Uncle Phillips, Mrs. Bennet's brother, was displaying the early signs of Alzheimer's disease. The brothers thought it best that they should be with their parents and their uncle to provide any needed assistance. The younger Bennet boys would certainly be of no help; Mark was too busy studying calculus, and Keith and Larry were too girl-crazy to care about much else.
The Bennet house was a comfortable, sprawling ranch-style place on the corner of Longbourn. Long ago the boys used to climb up the impressive oak in the front yard, but time had gone by and now old Mrs. Bennet was considering having it removed. Charley could not think of the fact but with some remorse. He sighed and rang the doorbell again, puzzled as to why no one was answering.
Across the yard, Elijah was laughing at Charley from a distance, wondering how his friend had failed to see that he was mowing the lawn. Charley only caught on when Elijah tapped him on the shoulder. "Looking for me, Chuck?"
Charley started violently, then cleared his throat. "Ah, there you are."
"Yup. You want something? A drink? It's real hot out."
"No, no, I'm fine. I just wanted to know if you've heard anything about this woman who's moving in on the end of Netherfield."
Elijah shrugged. "Just that she's single, and rich." He paused to consider. "Hm. You know, this could have possibilities."
"I don't think of you as the marrying sort, Eli," said Charley with a smile.
Elijah grinned and showed off his white teeth. "You know me too well."
Charley had often thought that his friend should have been the marrying sort, for the man was uncommonly fine looking, if not so solidly handsome as Jake. Elijah held a desk job as a banker, but only to support himself; he had yet to find his true calling. He was of a slight build, but very strong from working outside most of his life, and had sandy brown hair that fell elegantly on each side of his face. His height was an impressive six foot two, which put him in a position of power; but it was his eyes that most attracted women. They were large, limpid deep brown pools, which fixed you right where you stood. It just didn't seem fair to Charley, who was not blessed with any extraordinary looks.
"So, will you be staying here a while?" inquired Charley.
"Yeah, I think so," replied Elijah. "My uncle needs a lot of help these days, and neither my father nor my mother will exert themselves much."
"What did the doctor say?"
Elijah looked away to answer. "It's definitely Alzheimer's. And he's only 65." He turned back to his friend. "Makes you want to enjoy your memory while you still have it, huh?"
Charley nodded. "It sure does. Speaking of enjoying yourself, are you going to the party?"
Looking up in surprise, Elijah asked, "What party?"
"You haven't heard? The neighborhood is throwing a party for Caroline Bingley when she arrives. It's on Friday at 4:00 at the country club."
Mentally, Elijah checked his calendar. "All right," he decided, "Count me in. My brothers, too."
Chapter Two
Caroline Bingley stood in the yard, eyeing her new home with satisfaction. "It is beautiful, isn't it?" she cooed to her friend Georgiana Darcy.
"I hardly know," said Georgiana. "There's no accounting for taste."
"Come on, Georgie. Can you seriously look at the sun reflecting off that heavenly gray stone, and tell me I'm a fool for buying it?"
Ms. Darcy sighed. "It's not up to me to tell you what you should do. I'm a big city person; country houses do nothing for me."
"But you will stay for a while, won't you?" Caroline pouted.
"Yes, dear, but just until you get settled. Then I must return to my job, and William."
Caroline Bingley had been friends with Georgiana since they had met ten years back, at a party for the shareholders of the telecommunications company where Mr. Bingley worked, and which the Darcy family owned. Georgiana was rumored to be a spoiled, selfish girl, but Caroline, who was blessed with a pleasing and sweet manner, saw past that. Caroline looked up to Georgiana as her superior in situation as well as knowledge of the world.
Five years ago Mr. and Mrs. Darcy were killed in a car wreck, and Georgiana took on the care of her much younger brother, William, who was but sixteen, a sophomore in high school. Actually, his name was Fitzwilliam, but he would have knocked out your eyeteeth if you so much as mentioned the fact. It had fallen upon Georgiana since that time to run the company, which was a task she accepted, but did not much enjoy.
Georgiana sighed again. "I don't know, Caroline, should I just sell the whole damned company? Make an unimaginable fortune, probably cost a lot of people their jobs, and dedicate my life to something I enjoy doing?"
Caroline took her friend's hand and smiled sympathetically. "I know you, Georgie, and you'd never do that. If by some chance you did sell the company, you'd be so bored you'd buy it back again just to have something to do. Plus, you're already filthy rich. What would you do if you didn't have the company?"
"I don't know," said Georgiana thoughtfully, standing up to stretch her arms out wide. "Write a symphony, run for senator, climb Mt. Everest!"
"All by next week, of course," interpolated Caroline dryly.
"You know what I mean. There's a whole world of opportunity out there, and I'm crammed behind a desk."
Caroline sighed. "I don't know what to tell you, Georgie."
"That's all right." Ms. Darcy smiled. "Maybe one of these days I'll meet someone who really understands me."
Caroline merely smiled, for she knew that she really didn't understand her friend, and never would. "Well, hurry up and get dressed, my welcoming party starts in two hours." She paused to giggle. "Listen to me, my welcoming party."
Making a derisive sound, Georgiana muttered, "Oh, this will be fun. Hoe-downing with a bunch of yokels."
"I have told you time and time again, you'll never get anywhere with that attitude!" laughed Caroline, and she took Georgiana's hand and pulled her inside.
Chapter Three
Elijah and Jake Bennet came early to South Oaks Country Club to help Charley set up (or, rather, came early to help him taste-test the hors d'oeuvres.)
"How are the puffed shrimp?" asked Charley.
"I don't know," said Elijah with his mouth full. "I'll have to taste a lot more before I make up my mind."
Charley shook his head and moved on, directing Jake as to the placement of the tables. "Hey," said Jake, "Why do I have move heavy furniture while he eats shrimp?"
"Because you're the one with the big muscles," replied Elijah, and it was true. Jake was 28 and a little shorter than Elijah, but thicker; with a powerful frame and a square jaw that spoke of confidence.
Still, Big Jake (as his brothers called him) was rather shy. He stammered a little when he talked to women, especially the ones he liked. And, as anyone in the neighborhood would say, you could not find a nicer guy on the planet, or one more willing to listen and sympathize. Jake was one in a million.
Promptly at 4:00 some of the party arrived, locals from the neighborhood, but by 4:15 the guest of honor was still missing. So were Elijah and Jake's brothers, but that was not unusual; Keith and Larry thought that nothing was started until they arrived.
Soon enough, however, Keith and Larry blew in like a small tornado, with Mark trailing passively behind. Mark was in his second year of college at UCSD, with his major as molecular biology. Larry was a sophomore and Keith was a junior in high school.
"I told you," said Keith loudly, "Claire is going to the Prom with me."
"Uh huh!" scoffed Larry. "Then how come she was, like, all over me at the basketball game last night?"
Elijah glared disapprovingly at his brothers. "Guys! Settle down, okay?"
Larry nodded absently then asked, "Hey, Eli, are there going to be any cheerleaders here tonight? Oh, man, I hope Amanda comes..."
Elijah shook his head and moved off to welcome his mother, who had just come through the door. "Is dad coming, mom?"
"No, your father opted to stay at home with a book," whined Mrs. Bennet in that high-pitched voice which had been annoying neighbors for years. "Where's Jake?" she asked for her favorite.
"Over there, talking with Charley," Elijah gestured, then walked over there himself. "Guys, are you sure Caroline Bingley is coming? It's 4:30."
"Sometimes these rich folk like to be fashionably late," replied Charley with a smile. "Oh, wait, is that her now?"
A small young lady with reddish-blond hair had just entered the room, smiling brightly. Charley walked up to her. "Miss Bingley, I presume?" he greeted her. "How do you do? My name is Charley."
"Please, call me Caroline!" she giggled, extending her hand, which Charley shook enthusiastically.
Mrs. Bennet watched Charley greet Caroline, and proclaimed, "She is a pretty girl, isn't she?"
"Yup, she's pretty cute." Elijah turned to his brother but was unable to attain any response; Jake was looking steadfastly at Caroline.
Ms. Bingley had brought two friends with her, one, her brother, Charles. Charley said to him cheerfully, "My name is Charles too, although people call me Chuck."
Charles Bingley smiled simperingly. "People call me Charles."
Charley didn't know quite how to look, so he moved on to Ms. Darcy, a tall lady with raven hair and crystal blue eyes. "And you are...?"
"Georgiana Darcy," she said a little too haughtily.
"Ah! Well, you are welcome. Come in, everybody's friendly here."
Caroline mixed eagerly with the crowd, but Charles and Georgiana held back.
Mrs. Bennet said to her sons, "That other woman, Miss Darcy, is much more beautiful than Caroline. Why does she stand to one side?"
"I don't know, mom," replied Elijah, "She looks very proud."
"She really does! And I have heard that she is very rich. Well, money does not make up for lack of a good personality."
"Don't be so quick to judge, mom," her son warned.
Meanwhile, Caroline had spotted a handsome man chatting with friends around the punch table. "Hi," she said softly to Jake. "What's your name?"
Jake reddened. "Uh... my name...is Jacob. Uh, Jake. Jake. My friends call me Jake."
Smiling sweetly at his apparent nervousness, Caroline asked him to tell her a little about what kind of a neighborhood Hertford was like. Slowly, Jake opened up, coaxed by her subtle questions and gentle voice. Caroline kept him to herself throughout the evening, and to all observers it seemed as if a very promising relationship was in the making.
Elijah walked around the groups of his friends, laughing much over little nothings, as was his style, while trying to manage his younger brothers. Larry and Keith were flying about the room, always with a group of girls following, while Mark sat in a corner with his books. Watching Jake, Elijah was much pleased that Ms. Bingley should direct her attentions to him. Jake deserved a good girl like Caroline.
Halfway through the evening, Caroline excused herself from Jake's side to fetch a glass of punch. She took the opportunity of speaking to Georgiana, who had hardly said five words to any one person the whole afternoon. "Come on Georgie, don't you want to talk to anyone? I hate to see you standing around looking stupid."
Georgiana crossed her arms. "I don't see anyone who it would be worthwhile to talk to."
"There's tons of nice guys here! And some of them very good-looking."
Looking towards Jake, Georgiana said, "You have commandeered the only handsome man here."
Caroline smiled. "Oh, isn't he fine? But he's got a brother, you know."
"Who? The little pipsqueak?" growled Georgiana in reference to Mark.
"No, I meant Elijah. He's right over there." Ms. Bingley pointed towards the side of the room. "He's very cute too, and probably very nice."
Elijah, being within earshot, became keenly interested.
Georgiana gave him a cold once-over. "He's tolerable, I guess, but I've seen much better. Go back to your knight in shining armor, I think he's getting lonely. You're just wasting your time with me."
Caroline shuffled resignedly back to Jake to enjoy more pleasant conversation. As it was, the only one who Georgiana would talk to for any length of time was Charles.
Elijah was more confused than hurt at Ms. Darcy's dismissal of him; he did not care for the likes of her. He was not a man disposed to be angry or hold grudges, and he laughed as he told the story to his brother and mother later on.
The party broke up a little before eight, and as the last of the visitors filed out, they discussed the new owners on Netherfield Lane. Everyone was impressed by Ms. Bingley's cheerful, easygoing style; and all were disgusted by Ms. Darcy's contempt of her surroundings. It was a determined fact that Georgiana Darcy was the most disagreeable woman anyone had ever met.
Chapter Four
"Frank, Frank!" cried Mrs. Bennet for her husband. "Where are you?"
A feeble voice answered, "In the study, Marianne, where you last left me."
"You are still here? How boring! You really should have come to the party, Frank, it was so opulent!"
"Was it," replied Mr. Bennet, flipping another page.
"It was, it was!" cried Marianne in ecstasy. "You'll never guess what happened. Caroline Bingley was so taken with Jake! Not that that would come as any surprise, seeing as Jake is the most handsome of all my boys. What a charming girl, and so pretty! And rich, besides!"
Frank Bennet said absently, "She sounds idyllic."
"Oh, she is! But her friend, Miss Darcy, on the other hand..." Mrs. Bennet grimaced. "She insulted Elijah!"
Looking up sharply, Mr. Bennet asked quickly, "What about Elijah?" He was quick to hear anything about his favorite son.
"She said that Elijah was only tolerably handsome, and that she had much better not talk to him! She thinks of herself, no doubt, terribly well. Such a different sort from her friend, who is all kindness. And Caroline's brother was a very fine, well-dressed man too. I can't see why such lovely people should choose to be friends with Georgiana Darcy." She spoke the name as if it were something positively loathsome.
Elijah came in to inquire after his uncle, and received the report that he was sleeping quietly. Mr. Bennet seized upon the opportunity of asking his son, "Is it true some woman insulted you this evening, Elijah?"
Smiling, Elijah answered, "Yeah, she did, dad. Did mom tell you what she said?"
"Only the part about being tolerable."
"That was about it." Mr. Bennet leaned back in his chair, an odd smile on his face. "Women are fickle creatures," he said, looking towards his wife. She scowled back. "One minute they're insulting you, the next they ask you to dance." He shook his head.
Marianne Bennet put her hands on her hips and said to Elijah, "If your father was referring to me, I can assure you that he was grossly mistaken."
Nodding, Mr. Bennet said, "Bear it in mind, all the same."
"Dance? With Georgiana Darcy?" Elijah burst out laughing, "Dad, you're hilarious."
Late that night, Jake Bennet knocked softly on Elijah's door. Having no response, he opened the door slightly, and whispered to the lump on the bed, "Psst! Eli, you awake?"
The lump groaned. "I am now."
"Oh, I'm sorry, if you were sleeping I'll leave."
"Never mind, I suppose it doesn't matter now anyway." Elijah sat up and rubbed his eyes, flicking on the lamp.
As light flooded the room, Jake burst out laughing. "Oh my god," he managed to get out, "I can't believe you still have that shirt."
Elijah looked down at his white shirt that said, in neon letters, HERTFORD PARK DAY CAMP. Below the lettering was a little picture of a bow and arrow. He sighed. "You couldn't expect me to get rid of this!! We went their every year for seven years. Don't tell me you threw yours away."
"Years ago," said Jake, to the dismay of his brother. "I remember when you got that shirt. You ordered an XXL so it would be big enough for you to wear at night, and look at you, sixteen years later, still wearing it."
Elijah threw a pillow at his older brother, smacking him in the face. "The problem with you is that you've got no sense of tradition." Jake threw the pillow back. "Why'd you come in here? You wouldn't wake me up just to laugh at my shirt."
"No, I guess I wanted to talk." Jake sat down on the end of the bed.
"Let me guess. About Caroline."
Smiling, Jake said, "Well, that among other things. We've both got problems. For God's sake, here we are, twenty-six and twenty-eight, having a pillow fight."
"I don't have a problem with that," said Elijah, reaching for his pillow again, but Jake stopped him. "All right, we'll talk. You start."
"You're lucky, you know that? You can always have fun no matter where you are."
"What do you mean? It's not like you're in any kind of bad situation. You've got a good job and a nice place to live."
"Yeah, but I hate coming home to an empty house. I wish someone would be there, waiting for me, when I got home from work." Elijah wasn't going to figure that one out. "You want to get married."
"Sorta, yeah." Jake smiled that smile which had captivated girls for years. "I envy you because you're happy the way you are. I am, but I want something more."
"Well," Elijah said briskly, "Keep smiling to Caroline and I don't think you'll have to be lonely for very long."
"She is great, isn't she?" Jake grinned. "Do you think she could be The One?"
"You're asking the wrong guy, Big Jake. After all, I sure am the one who has this romance thing all figured out. You'd better ask someone who is better than tolerable." He laughed.
"Oh, did I tell you?" Jake inquired. "Caroline's sponsoring us for membership to the country club."
Elijah was taken aback. "Us at the country club? I don't think the yuppie world is ready for this..."
"Come on, it'll be a blast. Swimming, tennis, golf, the works!"
"Oh, I can see the headlines now. 'Jake Bennet, golfer extraordinaire, wins the blue jacket in the Masters Tournament!'"
"Very funny, but the Masters gives away a green jacket."
"Well, whatever. Now, can I go back to sleep? Please?"
"Sure." Jake got up and opened the door. "And Eli? Thanks for talking with me."
Elijah waved his brother out the door. "Get out of here. You're getting mushy again."
Chapter Five
Downtown Hertford was not really downtown at all, merely a strip; but it was as quaint as it was dull. Elijah walked quickly, however unhurried, in the door of the ancient library that stood amidst other things right in the center of town. The bell tinkled as he entered.
"Eli!" called out the librarian, a motherly woman named Mrs. Gardiner. She had known Elijah since he was four years old, and he, in turn, had become good friends with both her husband and her son Peter.
He laid his book on the return table. "Hi, Edna. How are you? How is Peter? I haven't seen him in a while."
"Oh, he's just fine.... A little burned out, I think, with his engineering job."
Elijah shook his head. "I just can't believe Peter went into that field. When we were in high school, he was always the one who called me at 4:30 in the morning to go surfing. We'd ditch school all the time to go to the beach. He was always good at math, I suppose..."
"Yeah, well, I think he still surfs on company time," laughed Edna Gardiner. She picked up his book, which he had checked out not five days before. "Wow. You read The Grapes of Wrath pretty fast. It took me over a month."
Looking guilty, Elijah admitted, "Actually, I read the first two chapters and fell asleep in my chair. Wasn't my cup of tea, I guess. Boring as hell."
Edna's overactive giggle sounded again. "A better cure for insomnia I've not found yet. Who needs Unisom when you've got John Steinbeck?"
It was Elijah's turn to laugh. "Well, Of Mice and Men was pretty good..."
Mrs. Gardiner had always been proud of Elijah because he was interested in literature. He wasn't a bookworm like Mark was, but he had a taste for Herman Melville and Robert Frost, which did him credit.
Elijah walked back out the door after checking out one of his favorites, The Shipping News. He thumbed through the pages as he left, not looking where he was going, until he ran headlong into something in his way.
"Hey, watch it!" he exclaimed, and looked angrily into the pristine blue eyes of Georgiana Darcy.
She made no effort to pick up his book, which had dropped on impact, so he stooped to retrieve it. "Sorry," he said as he stood back up. "I wasn't watching where I was going." There was a slight iciness in his voice.
"Entirely my fault," said Georgiana archly. She would have said something else, had she not begun to be mesmerized by his eyes.
After a bit of an awkward silence, Elijah moved off back in the direction of Longbourn Street, and Georgiana was obliged to follow him for a short period of time to get to her destination, the sporting goods store. She had been meaning for some time to get a new tennis racket.
However, it wasn't tennis on her mind as she walked a few paces behind Elijah on the street. She had for some time been sorry for the remark that she had made at the welcoming party, about being tolerable. Her patience had been tried, she'd been in a bad mood. The previous night she had lain awake for awhile thinking of how to apologize, no easy task for Georgiana Darcy. She had come up with no definitive answers. Now he hates me more, she thought, and the idea surprised her by being painful. She shook herself awake. You don't care about him, Georgiana, she told herself.
This resolution might have had a little more effect had she not suddenly realized that the entire time she had been walking, her eyes had been fastened on... how shall we put this? the back of Elijah's jeans. Not only that, but she had missed the sporting goods store entirely.
Turning abruptly, she squared her shoulders and headed towards her destination, resolving to think about him no more.
When Elijah returned home, he was greeted by Charley, and the news that the Gardiners were to have a dinner party the next night.
"Huh," said Elijah thoughtfully, "I was just at the library talking to Edna, and she didn't even mention it."
Charley shrugged. "Probably slipped her mind. Oh! Guess who I got a call from today?"
"I have absolutely no idea."
"It's someone who used to have a crush on you," continued Charley cryptically.
Elijah laughed. "Oh, well, considering the numerous masses of women who are just begging to date me, I can't say that I know."
"No? Wilma Collins."
Elijah cringed. He would have given the world to never again hear that name again in his presence, but it seemed as if she would continue to invade is life even when she was not around. As it was, Wilma was a short, pudgy girl with frizzy brown pigtails and thick glasses, who used to follow him around the elementary school playground, imploring him to allow her to join in his activities. Not that she wasn't nice, in an annoying sort of a way, but the facts remained...
It continued through junior high, but the explosion came in Hertford High. Wilma had asked him, in front of his entire class, to Prom; she wouldn't even believe him when he turned her down, trying to be gentle. Thanks to her, he had missed Prom that year, for he hadn't the courage to ask anyone else since that awful day. The last he'd heard, Wilma had gone to a school on the East Coast. She had always wanted to be a teacher.
Trying to regain his countenance, Elijah mustered the strength to say, "Wilma? What in the world did she call for?"
"Just to say that she's coming back to San Diego to take a job. She'll be visiting here, of course, in about a month..."
Elijah visibly flinched. "I think I'll be out of town," he decided aloud.
"Oh, come on. She's not that bad."
Shaking his head in disgust, Elijah warned his friend, "You don't know her like I do, Chuck."
"Now, Eli, you know that those bed-wetting stories were just cruel rumors."
"All the same, I want to be as far away as possible. I never forgave her for the junior Prom."
Charley thought back. "I thought it took a lot of courage for her to ask you."
Elijah added flippantly, "No, just a lot of pompous stupidity."
Drawing his breath in sharply, Charley looked like he found fault with the comment; but whatever he felt, he kept it inside. Charley never got mad, never raised his voice. He just smiled. "Well, maybe you'll be gone by then. How long is the bank giving you a leave of absence?"
"Two months max. But if Wilma's coming, I'll find an excuse to go back sooner."
"And Jake?"
"I don't know," Elijah said truthfully.
"All right then. See you at the Gardiners' tommorow?"
"Yup. Bye, Chuck."
Chapter Six
Caroline Bingley, her brother, and Georgiana Darcy were to attend the Gardiner's party as well, of course. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner had not been able to attend the welcome gathering at the country club, and thus had not yet set eyes on the new arrivals.
Caroline, giggling and blushing over the opportunity of seeing Jake tonight, had been in the bathroom for over two hours doing her hair and makeup. When she finally emerged, she appealed to Georgiana for advice.
"Oh, Georgie, tell me what I should do. Do you like the flowered slip dress"-- she held it up to her body-"Or the red satin?"
Georgiana shook her head in despair at her friend. "I don't know, dear. Jake will love you in whatever you wear. Just put on something, and let's go!! We're late." Unlike Caroline, Georgiana was low-maintenance. She had been ready for a while now, after throwing on something lavender and brushing her hair once, and sticking some barrettes in it.
Looking pained, Caroline looked back and forth between the two dresses, finally sighing and placing the red satin back in the closet, running into the bathroom with the flowered chiffon.
Charles appeared in classic preppy-rich-guy ensemble, looking boredly at his watch and expressing his wish that the night were already over.
"How can you say that, Charles?" chastised Caroline as she donned some gold earrings. "I have never lived in a place that I liked more than this. The people are so charming! Much better than big-city society."
Charles smiled and rolled his eyes expressively at Georgiana, who pretended not to notice.
Georgiana drove, in her sleek, elegant silver Mercedes, going only a little past the speed limit.
"Slow down, Georgie," cautioned Caroline, "You're going 47 in a 45 mile per hour zone."
Georgiana gave her friend a scathing look.
They pulled into the driveway and parked, closely followed by a large brown truck, whose engine could drown out a sonic boom.
"My God, that guy's louder than World War II," remarked Charles, trying to be witty. "Who can it be?"
The answer was soon forthcoming as Elijah Bennet and Jake descended from the chassy, their brothers climbing out of the flatbed.
Charles chuckled to himself a little bit as he approached Elijah. He looked the truck over disapprovingly, then began, "Uh, where did you acquire this, um, fine automobile?"
If he expected Elijah to look embarrassed he was disappointed. Eli only remarked, "From Burns Auto, over on Fourth. Why? You interested in buying a car?"
Charles merely smiled and moved off.
"I don't care for that guy, Jake," Eli remarked to his brother.
"You're jumping to conclusions again. I've met him, and he seems like a nice guy."
This was an unusual party in that both of the Bennet parents had come, and they were welcomed more effusively by Edna and Ted Gardiner, who ushered them towards the food table. Edna had clearly been baking all day, and Elijah was nothing loath to oblige her.
Meanwhile, Caroline had again hunted up and sequestered Jake, leading him out to the back patio for, as she told him, "a more private conversation." He most eagerly accepted, and the two exited the room to be by themselves.
Larry Bennet was doing some hunting of his own in the back of the room, where he had spotted a girl with long golden hair and a short skirt. He approached her, smiling seductively, and saying in his most suave voice, "If I told you you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?"
A quick flip of the girl's wrist and Larry's cheek was stinging. As she flounced away in the opposite direction, Larry remarked to his brother, "Keith, I think I'm in love."
Charley Lucas joined Elijah at the buffet table, where Elijah had made quick work of the mini-quiches. "Hey, how's it going? You're not still upset that Wilma's coming, are you?"
Elijah, with his mouth full, said thickly, "Nah, that was childish of me. After all, I've got a whole month to figure out how I'm going to avoid her."
Chuck scanned his eyes about the room, and noticed Georgiana standing alone, looking bored and elegant. He remarked, "I see that Miss Darcy is in her usual non-talkative form."
Elijah glanced at the woman and turned back to Charley. "Did you really expect anything else?"
Looking sly, Charley whispered in Eli's ear, "Don't look now, but she's staring at you."
A quick look revealed the truth of such a claim. "It's very rude to stare, doesn't she know that? We already know that she can't stand me," Elijah said in a tone bordering on laughter. Georgiana, catching his eye, nodded ever so slightly, but Elijah archly turned his back on her and walked over to where his mother was talking with Mrs. Gardiner.
"Oh, it is, it is," Edna was exclaiming. "An absolutely top-notch instrument and in such good shape! You can barely even tell it was used before we bought it."
"What is?" inquired Elijah, who hated to be left out of anything.
"The Gardiners have recently purchased a grand piano, Eli," explained Mrs. Bennet. "You know, Edna, Elijah plays. So does Mark."
Edna turned in surprise to Elijah. "I didn't know that! Well, in this event, you must try it out for us. Give us your expert opinion."
Elijah reddened. "Expert opinion?! I've taken a couple of lessons, but I'm really not very good. Why don't you ask someone else"
Charley, taking advantage of the pause in Elijah's refusal, blurted out, "No, he's just modest. He'll play something for you, he's really good."
"Great!" cried Ted Gardiner. "Right this way, if you will, Eli," he directed him towards the living room.
With a menacing glance at Charley, Eli reluctantly sat down at the piano bench. Members of the party began to gather around, and to his immediate mortification, he noticed Georgiana enter the room and choose a spot quite close to the piano. Jake and Caroline stood in the back, their hands entwined.
Clearing his throat, Elijah began to play a song he had known so long, he had it memorized. Those musically inclined guests recognized it as Scott Joplin's Maple Leaf Rag.
He played the whole piece through, short as it was, making it light and swingy, with only two or three minor note errors. The party applauded, and he made a clumsy bow, embarrassed. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Georgiana clapping slowly and thoughtfully, still looking in his direction.
He made his way back to the group. "You played beautifully, Eli," complimented Mrs. Gardiner.
"No, no, I made too many mistakes. I could never do justice to an instrument like that," he said, running his hand along the oak panels of the piano.
Mark, who had just joined the party, cleared his throat, hoping for attention. Mrs. Bennet ingnored him, but the indulgent Edna prompted, "Yes, Mark? Would you like to play?"
Delighted with an opportunity of exhibiting his skills, Mark sat down eagerly at the piano before Elijah could get a word in edgewise. Mark practiced an hour a day, but nobody could tell; the Bennet boys, and occasionally the parents, were frequently devising ways to charm Mark away from his favorite hobby.
He began to play Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata rather too heavily, and hit almost every third note wrong. He tried to pick himself up after every falter but it only succeeded in making him more confused, and more note errors followed. None of the party was enjoying the performance, but Georgiana Darcy had the arrogance to stand up and walk out of the room when he was only through the first page.
However, Larry was the rudest of all when he rushed up to Mark about halfway through the piece, and said, "Shove off, Mark, nobody likes to listen to that boring stuff."
Looking up in surprise, Mark said slowly, "But this is classic musical literature."
Larry rolled his eyes and sat down at the bench, forcibly pushing Mark off. "Come on, Keith," he shouted, "Let's play." The two of them broke into a banging, crashing version of Heart & Soul, probably doing the keyboard some serious harm.
"Oh, Mrs. Bennet," called out Edna Gardiner, "Would you please tell your boys to stop banging like that? I'm sorry, but I don't want the piano to get hurt"
"Nonsense, Edna, they won't hurt it. They're just boys having fun."
Edna looked troubled, and might have been forced with the task of asking them to stop herself if Mr. Bennet, who had been invisible almost all of the evening, hadn't stepped up and pulled the boys off the bench by their shirt collars.
The rest of the evening passed most uneventfully except for when Mark got his tie soaked in the punch bowl, or when Mrs. Gardiner accidentally dropped a cup of soup in Charles Bingley's lap. He had made a bigger deal about it than it ought to have been, but the results were the same; Charles had to endure the night with a most inconveniently placed wet spot on the front of his pants.
"Look at this!!" he exclaimed to his sister. "Brand-new Jil Sander pants. This is an outrage!"
"I'm sorry, Charles. But at least I now know what to get you for your birthday."
"What?" asked Charles, wiping his pants.
"Depends!" Caroline exclaimed, doubled over in laughter.
Charles, who was already on edge from the fact that Georgiana seemed to be paying a little too much attention to Elijah, found this seriously less than amusing, and walked off in a huff.
Edna, while making a reconnaissance of the buffet table, suddenly cried out in surprise, "Hey! What happened to all my quiches!" Many pairs of eyes turned towards Elijah, who coloured bright red for the second time that evening.
When it was time to leave, the whole party was brimming with gossip, not just about Charles' "accident", but mostly most about Jake and Caroline. It was a well-known fact that she had invited him, and him only, to have dinner at her new house on Friday night, and he had accepted.
Chapter Seven
That one dinner that Jake spent with Caroline over on Netherfield Lane had grown into many more, so that there was scarcely a week in which Jake was not invited over there for some reason or another, and it wasn't always dinner. Sometimes it was lunch on the terrace, or swimming in the pool-one time his presence was requested to help Caroline decide on new wallpaper for the bathroom.
"What's the news, Jake?" asked Elijah after his brother came home that evening.
"I think we'll go with the light green design, it goes well with the faucets."
"That's not what I meant, and did you hear what you just said? We'll go with the light green? God, Jake, she's got you designing her house! I'd turn tail and run, if I were you."
"I don't mind, you know. I like it," said Jake with a secret smile. "Besides, the Mist Veil is a beautiful color. Or do you think we'd be better off with the Raspberry Truffle?" he inquired, holding up a paint chip.
Elijah looked reproachful. "Well, I've always said that you just can't get a more manly color than Raspberry Truffle."
Sometimes Elijah was invited to these little gatherings over at Netherfield, but he always ended up feeling like a third wheel. Jake and Caroline would go out and sit in the gazebo to gaze at the moonlight, and Elijah would be left either to play games on Caroline's laptop computer or flip through some of her books. Neither Georgiana nor Charles, who flitted in and out, ever contributed much to his amusement. Because of this, he was not too pleased when Caroline invited him and Jake to dinner the following night.
"You've got to go, Eli. We always have fun over there," pleaded Jake.
"No, we don't. You do. The only good part about having dinner over there is the food."
"Well, then, you shouldn't have any regrets. In high school, didn't they call you the Walking Stomach?"
Elijah had a convenient talent of not remembering things when he didn't want to; but listening to Jake describe the succulent prime rib that was on the menu for that evening won him over.
"With béarnaise sauce?" asked Elijah cautiously.
"You bet."
After a short internal battle, steak triumphed, and Jake called Caroline back to tell her to prepare for two extra.
Caroline's house was a split-level, Spanish-style villa with outdoor stairways, balconies, a courtyard, and the works. Jake had to stand on tiptoe to reach the doorbell, while Elijah shifted uncomfortably behind him.
They were welcomed inside by an enthusiastic Caroline, whose curly reddish hair bounced up and down as she laughed. She took both of them by the arm, explaining loudly, "We're going to have dinner outside tonight, if you don't mind. It's a beautiful evening, and a lovely view from the balcony."
She led them out the sliding-glass doors and out onto the terrace, where appetizers were already on the table. They sat, and ate a little bit, and although Caroline did try to include Elijah in the conversation, she found that three really was a crowd. She liked Elijah very much, but he just wasn't Jake.
But Elijah did not feel included. He nodded and smiled wherever it was necessary, but half of their conversation he did not understand, and the other half consisted of discussions about paint and tile. Jake wore a three-piece suit and tie, Caroline a skirt and blouse, so Elijah in his khaki pants and untucked shirt didn't even belong at this costume party. He only wished he could have told Caroline that.
Soon, Romeo and Juliet excused themselves under the pretense of comparing tile patterns, and Elijah was left alone on the terrace. This was a better state of affairs for him, and he stood up, walked over to the edge of the balcony, and gazed at the stars that shone so clearly. For the first time in many years, he almost wished he weren't alone, that there was someone standing beside him, leaning her head on his shoulder.
Down below, by the pool house, Elijah could see Georgiana Darcy step out and wrap a towel around her wet hair. Swimming? At night? he thought, hoping against hope that she wouldn't be dining with them tonight.
He returned to the table, and picked up a cracker from the cutting board. Scooping up some of the creamed crab and placing it on top, he said out loud, "Hello there, Crab. How are you doing this evening?"
He paused to give the crab time to answer, then philosophized, "Poor crab. Captured from the water, cooked, and creamed. And here I am feeling sorry for myself, when you're about to be eaten." He took a bite of the cracker. "Nobody ever asked you if you would like to be eaten. Nobody ever said, 'wouldn't you rather stay at home?' No, it's not your fault."
A deep voice cleared its throat behind him, and said, "Uh, Eli, are you all right?"
Elijah whirled around to see Jake, and said amidst a shower of cracker crumbs, "Sure. Why wouldn't I be?"
"Um, you're talking to your crab."
Elijah looked back and forth between Jake and the creamed crab. "You say that like it's a bad thing."
The meal was fabulous, and Elijah began to feel more as if the night's engagement had not been such a tedious outing after all, when Charles and Georgiana joined the dinner party. Charles had just returned from a dentist appointment, and therefore was more irritable than usual. Georgiana's hair was still wet, and although Elijah scowled automatically when he saw her coming, he was rather glad; the old, gray T-shirt and black shorts that she wore made him feel better about his own casual attire.
"How was the water, Georgie?" inquired Caroline, helping herself to some more mashed potatoes. "I can't understand why you swim at night. Normal people swim when the sun is still up."
Georgiana shrugged. "I just like it better, that's all. The water's really warm," she said briefly.
At almost the same time, Charles blurted out, "Well, Georgiana is not a normal swimmer, is she? She was on the team in high school. She is an uncommonly fast swimmer."
"You are mistaken, I swim rather slowly," said Georgiana, her mouth full.
"But your form is so good; your strokes are so even," Charles complimented her.
Georgiana rolled her eyes and looked the other way, right at Elijah. She gave him a little smile, and he returned it, wondering afterwards why he had done so.
She continued to look at him more often than he would wish, and in time, he became a little fed up. He excused himself, saying that he needed to use the restroom.
"Oh, when you do," prompted Caroline, "Tell me which wallpaper do you think would go best with the faucets?"
Elijah said that he would, and hurried off, only too aware that the minute he was out of sight, Charles would begin to make scathing comments about him. Oh, well.
"You know, I really could use a gardener," remarked Caroline, looking out onto her backyard with a troubled expression. "The lawn really needs a good trim, and the hedges are all out of line."
"I used to know a guy who did gardening work-another of Mrs. Gardiner's boys," said Jake. "His name's Sam Gardiner, and he called his business Gardiner's Gardening-kinda cute, you know-but he moved about a year ago."
"Hm. That was helpful," said Charles under his breath.
However, Caroline went into a fit of laughter over the clever name, so Elijah, who had just returned, asked, "What did I miss?"
"Not much," explained Jake. "But Caroline needs a gardener."
"Not for any heavy work, you know, just for a little lawn-mowing and hedge-trimming," Caroline clarified Jake's statement.
Elijah thought for a moment. "Well, if that's all you need, I wouldn't mind coming over here every once in a while and doing a little yard work."
"Oh, no, I couldn't ask you to do that."
"No, it's no trouble at all. I love working outside, and it'll give me something to do before I go back to work in San Diego."
Caroline smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you, Eli! You're wonderful. That'll be an excuse for both you and Jake to come over here more often."
Jake grinned at this proposal, Charles looked like he was about to be sick, but Georgiana showed no trace of emotion on her face. Elijah began to wonder if she was actually made of stone, as many of the people around Hertford had begun to describe her.
Georgiana presently left to shower, her damp T-shirt clinging to the curves on her body, which Elijah, for all his efforts, could not fail to notice. He wondered how someone so nasty could look so good.
After the last of the wine had been drunk, and the last slice of steak eaten, Jake and Elijah took their leave. One, at least, was sure of coming back there with regularity; as to how the situation agreed with him, he could not himself tell.
Chapter Eight
Quietly so as not to disturb their sleeping family, Elijah and Jake entered the house and took a seat in the living room.
"I don't know about you, but I need some coffee," whispered Elijah on his way to the kitchen.
"Coffee?" Jake laughed softly. "Now?"
Younger brother shrugged and pressed the button on the electric coffeemaker, setting it to Extra Strong.
"I'll tell you, Eli," began Jake again, "I was pretty surprised by your volunteering to be Caroline's gardener."
"Hey, I never said anything about being her gardener," said Elijah on his way back to his seat. "I'm doing some light yard work, that's all. I like it." He picked up a National Geographic magazine from the coffee table and thumbed through it.
"I know, but after you complained about how much you hate going over there.... It wouldn't have anything to do with a certain blue-eyed beauty, would it?"
"No way! She's a witch. I haven't even noticed her since that party at the country club."
"Yeah, and I saw you 'not notice' her legs tonight."
"So she's got nice legs," said Elijah absently, flipping another page. "That doesn't change the facts."
Jake shrugged. "Anyway, I'm tired. I'm going to hit the sack."
"Why? Has it been a bad sack?"
Jake groaned and made gagging noises. "Go to bed and get some sleep, please! I can tell you're tired when you start making dumb comments like that."
Elijah rose, disclaimed, and went to fetch his coffee. "I'm going to be over at the Bingley House at 6:30 a.m., you want to join me?"
"Six-thirty! That's only four hours away! You're crazy."
"So?"
"Count me out."
The bright, dewy morning was peaceful enough for Elijah to almost completely enjoy himself. He trimmed the Japanese boxwood, uprooted an errant wild artichoke plant, and even got the lawnmower to start on the first try. All would have passed off for delightful if it weren't for a little mud mishap; looking up at the sky, Elijah failed to notice a slightly boggy patch until he was up to his knee in the sludge. Getting out was even more difficult, and by the time he succeeded in removing himself from the mess, his arms and his shirt were thoroughly muddied.
He was quick in deciding that this would not do; he set off for the house to clean off a bit, and hopefully borrow a new shirt. Caroline met him at the back door, emitting screams of laughter upon seeing his condition.
"Oh, you dear boy," she said after catching her breath, "What have you done to yourself?"
"I encountered a little mud, that's all. Do you have a place where I could hose off?"
"Yes, we have a poolside shower. Oh dear, you'll need a new shirt now, won't you? I'll get Charles to loan you one of his. Charles! Charles, where are you?" she shouted, and soon he appeared, tennis racket in hand.
"Can it wait, Caroline?" Charles said impatiently. "I'm off to the club"-he stopped short when he saw Elijah, and looked him up and down. "Oh, it's you. For a minute there, I thought a pig had wandered into the house."
Elijah looked like he wasn't going to let that one get away, but before he could spit out a proper retort, Caroline asked calmly, "Charles, Elijah found the boggy patch on the north side of the house. Be a dear, and let him borrow one of your shirts."
Staring at her as if she were crazy, Charles sputtered, "Loan out one of my tailor-made, monogrammed polos? Do you know how much those cost?"
Elijah, whose pride could stand nothing further, said loudly, "No, it's okay. I don't need you to do me any favors." Coldly, he turned his back on the proceeding until Caroline stopped him.
"Please, I insist," she pleaded.
Charles sighed and checked his watch. "Oh, all right, I suppose I can find an old ratty shirt somewhere."
Elijah bristled still further at this, finally throwing up his arms in disgust. "You know what? I'm going home, mud or no mud."
"Oh, no you're not," insisted Caroline, tugging at his arm.
As if to add further pain to the morning, Georgiana Darcy had just come down the stairs to see what the scuffle was all about. She saw Elijah, (or what there was of him), and concluded that he must have done a little mowing on the north side. Meaning to say something polite and comforting, yet humorous, she put on her nicest smile; but all she could say was, "What happened to you?"
"What does it look like?" he spat out.
Georgiana searched, but found that she had nothing further to say, and removed to a corner of the room with a magazine. Try as she might to keep her mind on the articles, her eyes and ears kept wandering to the conversation between Elijah and Caroline.
"You poor thing, I should have warned you about that area. Our pool man fell in much the same way as you did." Caroline brushed a bit of dirt from his hair. "Here, let's get you out of that dirty shirt."
Georgiana's eyes left the latest In Style permanently as Elijah peeled off the dirty white T-shirt. Part of her hoped that he wouldn't have a nice body, so that she could end this ridiculous obsession, but no such luck. He was lean and tanned, without that incredibly chiseled look of a bodybuilder, but looking like he got his muscles from pitching hay than from working out at a gym.
She sat transfixed as he swept a strand of hair clear of his eye, lifting up his head so that his beautiful brown eyes were in clear view. Slowly Georgiana's consciousness came back to her. Avert your eyes, you fool! her instinct told her. He's looking right at you!
Quickly she turned her eyes back to the magazine pages, but it was too late. Damn it! she thought. I didn't mean to do that! Now he thinks I was looking at him the whole time.
"Weren't you?" Conscience inquired. "Don't you know by now that you're infatuated with him?"
"I am not," she muttered back to the prying inner voice. "He's just handsome, and smart, and funny, and sexy, and..."
"Ah, is that all?" Conscience said nastily.
Georgiana shook head, trying to clear her thoughts. She didn't need any comments from that snooping hussy, anyway.
Elijah returned and walked out the door, down to the pool shower, carrying a gray and white Rugby shirt. She watched him leave, but was not sorry that he did so; she needed some time to think and sort things out.
Thoughtfully, she walked into the kitchen for a cup of tea, running her hands along the line of copper pots and kettles next to the stove. Finally, some time to myself, she thought, burying her face in the comforting Earl Grey.
A knock on the side panel interrupted her, and she groaned when she realized it was Charles. He asked her if she wanted to join him for a few matches, bandying his racket about, but she refused.
Charles looked at her worriedly, and inquired, "What's wrong, Georgie? You haven't been yourself these past few days."
Georgiana's mouth made excuses while her mind was thinking totally unrelated thoughts. Why is it, she wondered, that those who prefer solitude are always so intruded upon? Take Caroline, she hates being left out of anything, and gets unpleasant when she has no one to talk to. Now she has Jake, who is a really sweet, handsome guy. And me? I get the Idiot Charles. She then left her inner monologue and tuned back to what he was saying.
"And then," he was explaining, "I birdied the ninth hole. It would have been an eagle, but that hacksaw Soames distracted me and my drive went way over to the right. But still, I managed to pull up and set a course record, even with those crappy titanium alloy Lynx clubs.... Hey, are you listening?"
Georgiana held up her hand in apology. "I'm sorry, Charles, you'll have to excuse me. A sudden headache." She got up quickly and went to her room to get some aspirin. She wasn't lying; talking to Charles really did give her a headache.
Washing it down with the rest of her tea, she turned and looked out her window at the grounds below. She could see Elijah down at the pool, washing off his hair and rubbing the dirt off his arms. Sighing heavily, she wished that Elijah Bennet would pay her just one-tenth the attention that Charles so unwillingly bestowed.
Too late, she realized that Charles had followed her to her room. "What are you looking at?" he asked, looking out the window and seeing Elijah. Scowling, he continued, "Can you believe that guy? Who would be so dumb as to wander into a bog hole?"
"I don't know," replied Georgiana, turning away, "I guess it takes real talent."
"You can say that again. Could you imagine your brother doing something like that?"
Georgiana's short laugh was a little forced, and she said absently, "No, I suppose not."
"His eyes might seem not quite so fine after this incident, huh?"
"Not at all! In fact, they were brightened by the exercise."
Finally, she managed a genuine smile, and turned away from him smugly. He stood at the window for quite some time, muttering to himself softly, until he finally left for the country club.
Chapter Nine
Posted on Saturday, 20 June 1998
Not part of the story: Now that I have no more Business to attend to, *sniff!* and school's out, hopefully I'll be able to post more frequently. Hope you like this bit, it's been a while in the making.
Unluckily for Elijah, when he returned home, he found that Caroline had already called and spread the news to Jake about the little mud incident this morning.
"How's the Mud Man?" Jake greeted him.
"That's not funny, Jake."
"Are those Charles' clothes?"
"Yes! Get them off me now!" Elijah tore off the shirt as if it were something positively loathsome. "Why does that guy always wear orange? Horrible color!"
"True. But I've got some news so great that you'll forget mud and orange altogether," Jake grinned.
Elijah looked up disinterestedly. "And what could that possibly be?"
"The Bennets are now members of South Oaks Country Club!" Jake announced triumphantly, his arms held up in exultation.
However, Elijah was less that enthusiastic. "Huh? Why would we want to belong to the Country Club?"
Jake looked at him as if he were the village idiot. "To see Caroline, of course!"
Elijah couldn't help but smile at Jake's devotion. "All right, so she sponsored you for membership, but you've got to go back to work one of these days. What are you going to do, commute forty-five minutes just to play a little tennis with a cute redhead?"
"I guess so," Jake shrugged, completely missing the point. "I need to work on my backhand."
Pulling on one of his own shirts, Elijah said flippantly, "Well, as long as I don't have to do anything, I suppose it doesn't really matter."
"All you have to do is go to the initiation party, and we're all set."
Elijah froze. "Party? I don't recall you ever saying anything about a party."
"Sorry. Seven o clock, Saturday the fourteenth. And wear a tuxedo, for god's sake." Jake was continually admonishing his brother for his lack of a fashionable wardrobe.
Elijah stepped lethargically upstairs, wondering whether the tux he wore to Senior Prom still fit. He could feel a headache coming on.
Still, the next day he was back at Caroline's, trimming a climbing vine which he had missed the day before, due to mud. He stepped back to admire his work, as he heard a sweet voice behind him.
"I declare, Elijah, you are a magician with horticulture." Caroline had come up behind him, bearing a tray with frosty glasses of lemonade.
Smugly, Elijah replied, "I do what I can."
Placing a glass in his hand, Caroline continued, "How did I ever manage without you? You will come to the Country Club for your initiation, won't you?" she added with a giggle.
"Oh, of course. Jake told me the good news last night, and we all think it's fabulous," Elijah lied.
"Yes, so do Charles and Georgiana. Oh, Charles!" she called, hailing her brother form behind. "Aren't you excited about the Bennets joining us at the Club?"
"Ecstatic," Charles said flatly, and promptly left.
Caroline looked a little embarrassed as she turned back to Elijah. "Well, dear, I'll let you get back to your work now. Don't forget, I am paying you for your time."
"Don't be silly!" Elijah dissuaded her. "It's a pleasure, really."
"Well, we'll discuss it later. Ta ta!"
She walked away with her bouncy gait, and as soon as she did, Georgiana Darcy appeared from the hedges on the west side, almost as if on cue. Elijah groaned inwardly.
"Hi," she began, a little forcefully, then cleared her throat. "Lovely plant, isn't it?" she tried again, motioning towards the purple trumpet vine.
"Very much so," said Elijah absently, trimmimg off another branch, wishing she would leave. It was annoying to have those piercing eyes fixed on the back of his head. An awkward silence followed, so Elijah felt it incumbent on him to make a remark such as: "Doing anything special this week?"
"Um, well, the LA Philharmonic is coming to San Diego, and I'm going to Copley Symphony Hall with a few friends on Wednesday," she said hurriedly.
"Really?" Elijah asked, interested in spite of himself. "What's the program?"
"One of my favorites: Dvorak Ninth."
"No kidding? The New World Symphony? I've always loved that one."
Georgiana paused for a moment before adding, "Would you like to go?"
Taken by surprise, Elijah coughed, and didn't know what to say. If he said yes, she would undoubtedly despise his musical taste. If he said no, she would despise his taste in rejecting her. However, to his relief, he remembered he had an infallible alibi.
"Actually, that's the night I have to drive my uncle into the medical center for treatment." This was the truth, and he knew no one could dispute with it.
"Oh," she said sympathetically, actually showing a trace of emotion. "How is he doing?"
They conversed for some time, Georgiana making herself moderately agreeable, and Elijah determined to be civil to her. After all, all signs pointed to the fact that he and Georgiana would be seeing a lot more of each other once Jake and Caroline got engaged.
After a few minutes, however, conversation grew slack, and Elijah excused himself, saying that he must go to pick up his brothers from school. Georgiana watched him leave, noticing the soft way that the hair grew on the back of his neck.
She sighed in spite of herself. Being a fairly regular watcher of "The X-Files" (about which Charles continually teased her), she had previously thought that David Duchovny was the sexiest man on Earth. Now she wasn't so sure.
Elijah pulled his truck into the high school parking lot, and Larry and Keith climbed into the flatbed, swinging their backpacks down on the steel floor.
"Man! I'm so tired," complained Larry. "Can you believe that Mrs. Jennings gave me a 'C' in algebra? I worked my butt off in that class! That old witch..."
"I've seen you work your butt off to get her to switch your seat so you could sit next to Danielle, but I've never seen you open your algebra book," countered Keith sarcastically.
"So? She's worth watching. Last time she passed my desk I took my ruler and flipped up the back of her cheerleader skirt. Woooo!" Larry raised his eyebrows significantly.
"Oh yeah? What did she do?"
"She hit me in the arm and said, 'Stop it!' But you could tell she liked it. She must have sharpened her pencil thirteen times today just so she could pass by my desk." He leaned back and smiled smugly.
By that time, the brothers were at home again, and Elijah let down the tailgate. "Hey, Larry," he called out, "I heard your little success story on the way over here. Try to keep it under wraps, okay? Don't flatter yourself; she was probably just sharpening her pencil because she was actually working on some algebra." He slapped the back of Larry's head playfully.
"Hey! No fair!" Larry ran up to Elijah and punched him in the arm. "I'm telling you, she wants me."
Elijah shook his head as they walked towards the door. "Don't you see why Dad won't let you go to Brightville this summer?"
"But I have to go! That's where all the cheerleaders are going for a summer retreat!" Larry looked panicked. "Dad's just got to change him mind, that's all."
Keith, feeling left out, called to his brothers, "Don't forget me! I'm going to Brightville too!"
"Oh, no you're not," countered Elijah as he unlocked the door and ushered his brothers inside. "You two aren't going anywhere."
Chapter 10
Saturday came sooner than expected, as is usually the case, followed by the distressing news that Wilma Collins would arrive the following week. Elijah dressed for the country club party a little lethargically. Jake was already downstairs, tapping his watch, when Elijah finally located his bow tie (in the file cabinet, God knows why) and they set off.
The younger brothers were there, of course, riding in the back of the elder Bennets' Suburban. Larry had given Mark a wedgie and had started telling gross jokes before the end of the driveway.
"What is that subtle voice in my head telling me that it's going to be a long night?" Elijah asked Jake as he stopped at a traffic light.
Jake smiled pleasantly. "It better be long," he said, looking complacently out the window.
The sound of violin music accosted the Bennets' ears as Elijah was turning over the Suburban to a youthful valet in one of those ridiculous red suits. "Give it a nice space," Eli said, stuffing a bill into the valet's breast pocket. However, the humor was lost on the boy.
The entrance to the main hall of South Oaks was decorated with white wisteria and ivy, with marble columns lining the door. Jake and Eli weren't fast enough to catch Keith and Larry from ripping off pieces of the flower and tucking them into their breast pockets.
"That was smooth," said Elijah to the boys. "Give flowers to me. Now."
Reluctantly, they handed over the mashed petals into their brother's hand. "Now behave," Eli warned them, "Or else."
Keith and Larry would have dismissed an "or else" as an empty threat from anybody else but Elijah, but they both had lively recollections of dunkings in a freezing lake or being hung upside-down from the banister. Eli had always been the voice of order in the family, Mr. and Mrs. Bennet being to indolent and Jake too gentle.
Thus admonished, the Bennets entered the room alive with Mozart concertos and swimming with champagne. Caroline Bingley, her pretty eyes honing in on Jake, soon joined them and led the family to the front of the hall. There they were met by the head of the country club, a pompous man named Mr. Eliot, and given their membership certificate.
"Congratulations," he said, shaking each by the hand. "I know this must be an honor."
Most people would have raised their eyebrows at that, but Jake went on smiling in grateful appreciation. "Thank you so much. We're all so glad to be members," he said wholeheartedly, nodding towards the retreating figure of Elijah on his way to the buffet table.
Jake was still engaged in small talk with Mr. Eliot when Charles Bingley appeared by his side. "Hey pal," Charles said to Jake, grinning with a smile that could have been taken from the ice bucket. "Been working on your swing? Now that you can come to the club, I'm dying to take you out on the course. I shot an eagle at green four that would blow your mind."
"Thanks," said Jake with unaffected sincerity, "but I don't have any clubs. I haven't played since high school."
Charles smiled for real this time. "Even better!" he exclaimed.
The sight of Elijah Bennet in a tuxedo was enough to catch many a wandering female eye, and Georgiana Darcy knew it. Halfway through the evening, she decided that she had had enough of seeing him walk around and look sexy. She was fed up with watching him dance with all the pretty girls in the room. It was time for action.
In between songs Georgiana tripped gracefully up to the champagne tray and landed next to Elijah. "Want to dance?" she blurted out.
Unfortunately, she had popped the question just as Elijah was swallowing a sip of champagne, and the surprise was enough to send him into a coughing fit. "I'm sorry," she stammered when he was sensible again. "I didn't know..."
"Oh, it's okay," he said, smiling anemically, his face still red. "You just came out of nowhere."
"Yeah." Right now, it seemed pretty dumb to ask him again, but Georgiana was not used to being put off. "Let's dance," she said with decision. Taking him by the wrist, she led him into the crowd of dancers and placed one arm firmly on his back, as if to prevent any escape on his part.
The song was Maybe I'm Amazed by the Beatles, and the couples moved slowly around the room. Elijah, still not fully comprehending how he came to be in Georgiana Darcy's arms, moved a little hesitantly at first. However, they were blessed by the choice of song, and as soon as he realized that the subtle scent of her perfume was not thoroughly disagreeable, he began to dance with more grace.
Georgiana could not remember a time in her recent past when she had felt so...what was the word? Happy. It came on her as she was spinning around, her left hand gripping the back of her partner's neck. I am happy, she thought. The realization left her a little flustered, unaccustomed as she was to the emotion.
On the other side, Elijah's thoughts were not so elated. I am dancing with the most beautiful woman in the room, he thought, but the words had an empty ring. Georgiana danced well, but Eli still thought he could feel that icy coldness that lay under the smooth velvet dress. Is she having fun? he wondered. Her face is blank. Her face is always blank. At the moment, the chill visage was making Elijah uncomfortable.
As the song came to a close, Elijah escorted his partner over to the buffet table, made hurried comments, and rushed away to find Jake. It wasn't that he had not enjoyed the dance, he just felt that he could never be comfortable in the presence of Ms. Darcy.
Older brother greeted him with, "That was unexpected."
"No kidding. I almost choked when I saw her."
"You do realize that any other guy in the room would kill to dance with her, don't you?"
"Well then, they can be my guest. I mean, you know how most people have even a sliver of human warmth in them? Georgiana doesn't. I think she's an alien. Call Mulder," Elijah said cryptically, and Jake, who had never seen the show, fell silent at the last remark.
Finally, Jake shrugged and replied "Caroline likes her."
"That's the most mysterious part," Eli remarked absently, and slowly walked away to check on the younger brothers.
The rest of the evening passed by smoothly enough. Jake, warmed by Caroline's affection, virtually floated on air. To everyone with eyes, he seemed several feet taller that night. Everyone, that is, except Ms. Darcy, who watched their embraces with chill disfavor.
Sick of dancing, Elijah spent most of his time talking with Chuck, discussing the manifold failings of the female sex, as well as last week's Pistons game. The night grew long, and soon enough he began to collect his family preparatory to go home.
First he rounded up Keith and Larry, who were trying to convince the waiter that they were both twenty-five and could thus have a glass of champagne. With a firm hand on each elbow, Elijah escorted them off.
"I wasn't going to drink it!" protested Larry.
"Oh, what a mistake I just made," said Elijah acerbically, hitting his forehead with the palm of his hand in awful irony. "I see now you just wanted to stand around and look distinguished. Terribly sorry," and he tightened his grip.
The jailer and the two captives walked haltingly up to Jake and Caroline, who were dancing thoroughly entwined. "Come on, Jake, time to go," he said briskly.
"Hm?" said Jake, as if coming out of a dream world.
"Earth to Jake! You. Home. Now."
Jake looked absently from Elijah to Caroline. "Go?" he asked as if the word was completely new to him.
Luckily Caroline released her hold and told him gently "I think Elijah's right. You can go now and I'll call you tomorrow."
This cleared up the concept for Jake, and the brothers were soon on their way out. Elijah hailed a valet, who went in search of the Bennets' Suburban.
Georgiana was outside, apparently in search of some fresh air. Upon seeing the brothers, she walked over, asking Elijah if he was leaving.
"Yes," he replied, for there seemed very little to say on the subject.
The valet drove up with the truck, and Elijah ushered everyone in. "Well, good night," he said to Georgiana. He prepared to climb into the driver's seat when he was drawn back by a hand on his arm.
"One more thing," Ms. Darcy interpolated. As Elijah turned around, Georgiana's lips met his in one swift motion. She kept them there for a few seconds, then slowly drew back to gauge his reaction.
Elijah hadn't moved, but rather stood rooted to the ground with bewildered eyes warily searching her face to see if maybe the incident had not really happened. He seemed incapable of speech, however. Georgiana smiled a bit, squeezed his hand, and walked away.
Jake stepped out of the car and took the keys from Elijah's hand. "I'll drive," he said softly. Having still obtained no sign of life, he waved his hand in front of his brother's face. "Eli?"
Elijah raised his hand in a gesture of blocking whatever Jake had to say. "Let no one speak to me," he said in a flat monotone. "I shall no doubt recover in time." Slowly he climbed into the passenger's seat, and Jake started the car. They drove home in silence.
To be continued...
Chapter 11
The Bennets' life had settled more or less into its previous pattern, Jake living more at Caroline's place than his own, younger brothers tormenting each other, Elijah doing his best to avoid Georgiana Darcy at any cost. He had the uncomfortable feeling that he was a new speck on her horizon, a new challenge for her to seduce. Well, he would never let that happen! But with every fresh burst of assertiveness came unease and doubt as to his own stance of antipathy towards her. He never remembered being this confused over anything before; not over a woman, at any rate.
Jake, meanwhile, was living in seventh heaven. Not being one to crow over success, Jake showed his happiness in other ways, and Elijah knew and was pleased. The only dark cloud was the fact that his leave of absence from work wouldn't last forever: soon he would have to leave his country club paradise and return to the city and the office.
And then came The Letter. No warning, no sign of it being a joke. When Elijah returned from running errands one afternoon, Jake was sitting, head in hands, on the overstuffed armchair beside a pile of mail. He wore sweatpants, his hair uncombed, a crumpled piece of paper on his lap.
Eli stopped short when he saw his brother. "You okay?" he asked. Obtaining no response, he tried again. "Jake?"
Jake snapped briefly into action, crumpling up the paper and hurling it at his brother, then sinking back into the chair.
Elijah's puzzled eyes read:
Jake-Sorry I can't hit the links with you next Tuesday. Carrie and George and I are going back to LA for a while. I don't exactly know how long we'll be there, but Carrie's already left. Something to do with TCD Com., and George wants to see her brother. Sorry again, pal, but I'll just have to beat you some other time. Ha ha! Come up if you get the chance.
--Charles
Throwing the letter back onto Jake's inert form, Elijah said, "So what's the big deal? She's up there for a couple of weeks, she comes back down, you guys play tennis. You have to get back to work anyway."
Jake's voice sounded hoarse. "Not a word, Eli-not a call, not anything." He closed his eyes for a moment, as if to muster his strength, before saying forcefully, "We've been together for almost two months. Maybe that's not much, but I loved her! She loved me! And then she leaves, for God knows how long, and I hear it from her brother."
"Well, it's not like she went to Spain!" Elijah remarked, trying to sound upbeat. "She's two hours away. Go up there. Pay her a surprise visit."
Unfolding the letter, slowly as if it gave him pain, Jake pointed to the empty spots on the page. "Do you see an address here? Phone number? Charles doesn't want me up there. It's perfectly clear." He sighed lightly as the last of his strength left him.
Elijah took a seat and placed his hand on Jake's shoulder. "I'm sorry, man, but I still say it's not as bad as you make it out to be. It's strange, though."
"I know!" Jake replied, his eyes flickering in the bright of the afternoon sunlight. "It's like all of a sudden something happened-did I scare her off? Did her parents find out about me and not approve or something?" He began to pace the room in agitation.
Trying to conceal a smile, Elijah said "Um, buddy, Caroline's an adult, and this is the late 1900s? Not the late 1700s?"
"I scared her off, then," Jake said quietly.
"No. No, you couldn't have. If she really just left like this, she doesn't deserve you-" Jake waved his hand distractedly at Elijah, as if to silence him, and headed up the stairs.
Stung by this injustice to his brother, Elijah spent the day moping and doing anything but what was useful, either to himself or Jake, who seemed inclined to being left alone. He flipped on the TV, but nothing was on, and picked up a book, but the words made no sense. He finally decided on taking a long walk in the twilight, and went to put on a jacket, when the front doorbell rang.
Charley was there, smiling benevolently, with a guest. Elijah looked at the frizzy brown hair and let out at inward scream. Wilma.
Oh God, he thought. I can't take this now. I simply can't take it.
"There he is!" Wilma whined. "Looking as cute as ever. Sorry I couldn't make it in time for your little country-club party, but the planes, you know!"
"Right. The planes," said Elijah absently, his mind racing for an adequate excuse for not inviting them in. He drew a blank, however, so when Charley finally asked if they could come in for a cup of coffee, he had to say yes.
In the short time that Elijah had to ready the coffeemaker in the kitchen, he decided that tomorrow was an excellent time for going back to the city and his job. His uncle was under the care of a licensed nurse, he reasoned, and it would also be advantageous to Jake to get him out of the countryside where everything reminded him of Caroline. An excellent plan, indeed.
The next hour felt like four. Wilma did most of the talking, about her time in college, her friends and relatives, and her new job in town. A lot of her time was spent talking about the Bourghs, the family of a child in her class, who had donated to the school an amount of money that financed the building of a new auditorium. Wilma was quite overcome on this subject.
As she talked, Elijah was struck by how little eight years had done to improve her, in any way. Her appearance was somewhat softened by contact lenses that replaced the old coke-bottle glasses, but she had put on more weight, and her drop-waisted dress was extremely unbecoming. Her language had been broadened by a college education, but the lack of sense remained the same. Elijah was grateful that Charley humored her, because he was in no condition to do so.
Poor Jake made a brave effort to come down and socialize, for it was against his nature to slight a guest, even in the midst of pain. He was not himself, however, and Elijah made his excuses, saying that Jake was ill and should go early to bed. Jake gave his brother a look of extreme thanks as he again mounted the stairs.
"Bye bye Jake," Wilma waved him out of the room, then turned to Elijah. "So what's been happening to you these past weeks and months and years?"
Another inward scream, this one more piercing. Elijah recited a brief play-by-play of what had been going on in Hertford, mentioning the Bingleys' stay but omitting Jake's part in the recent events. Wilma kept interrupting at various intervals which scraps of annoying "remember whens" that Elijah either didn't or had no wish to recall.
Finally she rose to take leave, hoping to come by again soon. Nothing gave Elijah more pleasure that evening than saying, with affected sorrow, "Actually, I have to get back to town tomorrow. Sorry we couldn't have talked more, but maybe we'll run into each other some other time." Over my cold, dead body, he added silently.