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Re: P&P: The Time Slip (part one of 5)

March 25, 2015 11:32PM
Visually PAINFUL. I'm not opposed to time travel stories and it's compelling tha you want to include BOTH Jane and Lizzy. But, may I suggest a Beta and reformatting.

I stopped reading pretty quickly because it's essentially unreadable. Even presuming you're trying to set a technical sci-fi vibe, your writing is burried under your formatting issues.

Regroup and repost.

P&P: The Time Slip (part one of 5)

Rae ElaineMarch 23, 2015 12:11AM

Re: P&P: The Time Slip (part one of 5)

LPMarch 25, 2015 11:32PM

Re: P&P: The Time Slip (part one of 5)

KatieJMarch 25, 2015 01:49AM

Couldn't read due to wierd line endings?

TashaMarch 25, 2015 05:48PM


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