Beginning, Section II, Next Section

Part 7

Thursday, 9 July 1998

Nantucket Island, Mass. June 13, 1998

hea slept in very late the next morning. This was due to the fact that she had spent most of the late evening and the early morning hours attempting to cajole the bit of ivory into revealing its purpose. Thea fervently hoped that this purpose might be to transport her far away from modern-day Nantucket and the problems that she had discovered there. None of her efforts were successful and, in the light of morning, all of them seemed ridiculous. She was embarrassed to recall how she had tried closing her eyes and rubbing the etching slowly with her finger, rocking back and forth while intoning different syllables in an attempt to create a mind-altering chant. She had spent at least an hour staring intently at the picture of the ship to see if she could view it three-dimensionally, just like a "MagicEye" picture. She had even snuck into the kitchen in an attempt to find candles and matches in order to give the room an Old-World ambience. After thirty minutes of rifling through drawers and cupboards, she came to the conclusion that Diana and David did not have any candles.

In the end, too sleepy to continue her efforts, she tried putting the piece of scrimshaw under her pillow, in the hopes that she might be able to dream herself away from the modern world and Andrew Carroll.

She woke up extremely disappointed, put the piece of scrimshaw into its box, and resolved not to look at it ever again.

The day didn't get much better. Thea was filled with apprehension about seeing Drew and Crystal Sloane at his parent's party that night. She couldn't enjoy playing with Little David because she kept imagining how difficult that evening would be. She was barely able to attend to Diana's attempts at conversation because she kept on trying to come up with an excuse for staying home with Little David. Diana refused to accept any of Thea's arguments. Diana was not going to allow the Carrolls to think that she treated her sister like an unpaid nanny. She had hired a perfectly wonderful au pair for that purpose! Diana had flatly refused to let her 'hide from society' as she put it.

Thea wondered on several occasions how Diana could be so unconcerned about Thea's feelings on seeing Andrew again, until she remembered that Diana had never known about their relationship. Diana and David had been honeymooning in Europe at the time. By the time they had returned home, Drew had moved to Los Angeles. No one had ever known but her parents. She realized that he had not even told his parents when they did not remember her name last night.

"Good Lord, is that what your wearing to the Carroll's party?" Diana did not bother to disguise her dismay at the outfit her sister decided to wear that night at the party.

Thea looked down at her dress, "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" she asked, a note of frustration creeping into her voice. Thea could not see anything wrong with her selection. It was a light green shift with a pattern of small roses and a lace collar around the neck. It was made out of cotton and therefore comfortable enough to wear on a summer evening.

Diana's eyes slid down from Thea's long hair which had been pulled back into a clip to the tennis shoes on her feet. "Where would you like me to start?" she asked disdainfully. "Thea, you aren't eighty-four, why do you have to dress as if you are?"

"I've worn this dress to school many times!" Thea defended.

"Which should give you a clue right there," Diana interjected. "Have you no idea what is suitable for an evening party?" "No, but I'm sure that you are going to tell me," Thea huffed.

"Someone needs to and it might as well be me!" Diana shouted.

Thea turned away from her sister and felt the teardrops forming at her eyes. A barbecue over at Andrew Carroll's parents bungalow held only the promise of punishment for Thea. And now, to have Diana criticize her choice of outfit! She had taken all that she could handle. She felt the tears begin to splash down onto her cheeks.

Thea's distress seemed to have an effect on her sister. "There now," Diana came over to her talking soothingly, as if Thea was as young as Little David. "Thea, don't cry. I didn't mean anything by it." She placed her hands on her sister's shoulders and began kneading her muscles comfortingly. "It's just that I hate to see you going on like this!"

"Going on like this?" Thea echoed, crying in earnest. "What do you mean?"

Diana took Thea's face in her hand and pulled it around to her. "Do you really not know what I mean?" she asked, looking earnestly at her sister.

"No!" Thea blubbered.

Diana shook her head slowly and sighed. She pulled her sister over to the couch and made her sit. "Thea, you're very pretty and, I'm sure that men would consider you attractive if you would stop attempting to look like some school marm from the nineteenth century."

"I don't look like a school marm," Thea defended.

"Yes, you do!" Diana said forcefully. "And you're too interesting for that. Men should be pounding down your door to get to know you better."

"You think that I should dress trampily in order to score a man," Thea retorted.

"No!" Diana exclaimed, "Just a little more appealingly. You have a wonderful figure, why shouldn't you show it off a little. At least you aren't recovering from childbirth." Diana smiled wryly.

Thea looked at her sister and attempted to smile back. She didn't want to embarrass Diana in front of her friends. But she also hadn't packed any outfits specifically designed to appeal. "I don't think that I have anything in my suitcase that you'd like." she whimpered.

Diana nodded sympathetically. "Why don't we see what's in my closet?" she asked. "I kept a lot of outfits here from last summer and I won't be wearing any of them very soon."

She led Thea into her bedroom and was soon fishing around in her closet for something appropriate to wear. Thea sat on the edge of the bed, tearing a soggy kleenex to shreds. She had to admit that what Diana said was true. Most of the pieces in her wardrobe back home were bought because they looked comfortable or sensible or because they made her seem older and more capable of controlling a classroom full of unruly fifth graders. She couldn't think of anything that she had purchased in the last four years that was flattering or made her look more attractive.

"How about this?" Diana pulled a tiny dress from the rack. "The essential black dress! No wardrobe is complete without one." she commented.

"It looks awfully short." Thea squeaked.

"It is awfully short!" Diana nodded significantly. "But you have the legs to pull it off and I have just the right pair of shoes for you to wear with it." Diana threw the dress onto the bed next to Thea and began looking through the shoes scattered around the floor of the closet.

"What do you wear over it?" Thea asked as she took in the fact that the dress had no sleeves. "Is there a blazer or a sweater that goes with it?"

Diana whirled around and looked at her sister incredulously. "No," she began to giggle. "Putting something over it would spoil the whole effect!"

"What if you get cold?" Thea put her arms around herself, already feeling chilly.

"Then you suffer pleasantly and move closer to someone warm!" Diana was beginning to laugh in earnest now. "Thea, when did you become such a prude!"

"I'm not a prude!" Thea exclaimed.

"Then, prove it," Diana challenged, throwing a pair of dangerously tall slingbacked heels onto the bed with the dress.

Thea gasped. Could she actually go tottering around in those?

"Go ahead and put it on and when you're finished, I'll help you with your hair." Diana called as she walked towards the door, "And, Thea--" she said as she reached for the doorknob. "Don't say anything about the length. I'm two inches taller than you and I felt comfortable in it! You wouldn't want to offend me now, would you?"

There were more people at the party than Thea had imagined, which was something of a blessing because the extra bodies acted as a buffer between herself and Andrew and Crystal. Thea found herself circling the room in opposition to that couple, always keeping them as far away from herself as possible. The problem with her avoidance strategy was that it meant that Thea spent most of her time watching them from a distance. She had to admit to being crushed by what she saw. For all of her bravado in the weeks leading up to her arrival in Nantucket, the fact that she was not yet completely over him was shocked into stark relief. She watched helplessly as Andrew danced attendance around Crystal, bringing her a glass of wine and going to refill it whenever she became thirsty. Thea's ears picked up the tones of his voice as he proudly introduced her to his Nantucket friends and the few members of his famiy that had made the trip over from Boston to see him again. It was evident to all just how much in love he was with her. She watched him as he guided her through the crowd posessively. His hand seemed as if it were surgically implanted on the small of her back. He rarely took his eyes off of her, even when refilling her drink. He caused it to overflow and spill on the carpet once because he was too busy smiling at her to notice what he was doing.

Thea would have considered this sort of besottedness very amusing if it had been anyone else but Drew.

Crystal was just as lovely in person as she was on screen. Her honey-blond hair was long and thick and she had it swept back from her face with the aid of two jeweled combs. Her smile seemed to light up the room and her laughter charmed the group around her into laughing as well. Thea noted, with some disappointment, that Diana had been one of the first people to insist on being introduced to her and had acted almost like a 12-year-old in expressing her appreciation for Crystal's work. Thea was almost surprised that her sister hadn't brought a napkin and pen with her for Crystal to sign like some pathetic autograph hound.

Thea had to admit that her own predicament would have been hilarious if it were happening to anyone but herself. Didn't something just like this once happen to Lucy Ricardo? Or maybe it was Laverne from 'Laverne and Shirley'? Thea couldn't remember the specifics but knew that her attempt to appear as if she were enjoying herself tremendously was probably completely transparent. She felt as if everyone in the crowd knew that she was pathetically still in love with the 'man of the hour' regardless of the fact that he had left her four years ago and was currently dating one of the most beautiful women in Hollywood.

Thea felt like curling up into the fetal position on one of the couches and forgetting about everyone around. The only thing stopping her from running out of the doorway and back to the other cottage was the fact that Diana had worked so hard to make her appear elegant and attractive. She didn't want to let her sister down. She remembered Diana's instructions to her and was doing her best to carry them out. Diana had cautioned her not to fiddle with her ridiculously small dress because it would make people realize how uncomfortable she was in it. She revealed that the trick to pulling off a dress like that was to act completely at ease in it, even if that was not the case. Thea had disappeared into the bathroom twice in order to readjust herself, pulling the straps of the dress up and the hem of the dress down.

Diana had also reminded her to walk slowly and to lean into the balls of her feet more than the heel. Thea found this balancing act to be extremely difficult. She realized her wobblyness was due to the fact that she never wore high heels. Being a schoolteacher certainly did not give a person enough practice in the fine art of walking in stilletos! The shoes that Diana had lent her were also a size too large. Thea felt as if they were about to fall off at every step. She kept to the perimeter of the room and tried discreetly leaning up against the wall whenever possible. She was in agony after an hour of standing up in them, attempting to look natural.

When Diana put Thea's hair up into an elegant French twist, she begged her not to fuss with it either. She remembered that her sister had a habit of raking her hands through her hair whenever she became nervous. "We don't want it to come crashing down on you tonight!" Diana said as she put a few more pins into the roll and laquered it completely with hair spray.

Thea mingled with the party guests, trying desperately to appear poised and at ease. Many of the people from Andrew's film crew had been invited to the party and she found herself listening in on many interesting conversations between the focus pullers and the boom operators. Thea was not quite sure what a boom operator did, but they certainly had quite a few enlightening Hollywood stories.

She even managed to start a conversation with one of the make-up artists as they were both re-filling their glasses.

"Great earring," Thea attempted, smiling appreciatively at a short woman with curly blond hair and an entire charm bracelet dangling from one large, gold hoop.

"Thanks," the blond woman smiled back and emptied a bottle of merlot into her glass. "It's my good-luck earring. Much more visible than a bracelet. I buy a charm that reminds me of every film I've done."

"Really," Thea appeared intrigued.

"Yep," the woman replied and took off the hoop so that Thea could get a better look. She put it in her palm and spread the miniatures out. "This one's from 'Titanic' " she said, pointing to a replica of an ocean liner.

"You worked on that one?"

"Hundreds of us worked on that one," she said, "There were so many extras and they all needed make-up."

"That must have been very hard. Especially with all of those scenes in the water." Thea commiserated.

"Yeah, the make-up kept on washing off," the woman took a sip of wine, "My name's Roslyn."

"I'm Thea."

"Do you live here?" Roslyn asked, "on the Island?"

"No, I'm visiting my sister who has a cottage next door to the Carrolls." Thea said. "I'm actually from New Jersey."

Roslyn nodded. "So you know Drew, then," she assumed.

Thea was taken aback by that question at first, until she realized that it was perfectly natural for her to admit to knowing him slightly. "Yes, a little." she sighed, "He was the best man at my sister's wedding, but I haven't seen him since he's become --" she stopped. How was one to describe what Drew had become?

"Since he's become famous?" Roslyn supplied.

Thea nodded sheepishly.

"It's funny how people become famous on you," Roslyn sympathized. "I can't tell you how many people I've worked with before their big break."

"Does it change people?" Thea asked.

"Sometimes," Roslyn said. "But then, they're almost always nice to we make-up artists, or they are if they know what's good for them."

"Why is that?" Thea was confused.

"Because we control how they look," Roslyn admitted darkly. "I could tell you stories of make-up artists who were snubbed and went on to exact their own brand of revenge." Roslyn cackled wickedly.

"I guess that I'll stay on your good side," Thea laughed with her.

"Do," Roslyn agreed. "Come down and visit the trailer sometime if you get bored here on Nantucket."

Thea smiled and promised that she would try.

They moved away from one another in perfect 'working the crowd' fashion and Thea decided to go place herself near the sliding glass door that led to the porch. She knew that Andrew and Crystal were sitting down on a couch located at the other side ofthe room and appeared to be engaged in feeding each other mini-carrots. If it were anyone other than Drew, Thea would have rolled her eyes in disgust.

Thea leaned against the glass door and attempted to look cool, calm, elegant, and interesting. This was a look that was not easily achieved and Thea had to eventually admit was unsuccessful. The only man who passed her way was a member of the catering staff, proffering a tray of jumbo shrimp and cocktail sauce. Thea snagged one as he passed and, in doing so, accidentally rocked back on her left heel. She felt it snap under her.

Thea dropped the shrimp on the floor and had to put her hand on the handle of the sliding glass door in order to gain her balance. She looked down. The heel had broken off.

"Oh no!" Thea hissed under her breath. She bent to pick it up. What was Diana going to say now? Thea wondered if it could be repaired.

She looked up and around at the crowd, trying to see if anyone had witnessed her mishap. They all seemed to have continued talking. Thea sighed and began to open the door that led to the porch, almost glad to have an excuse for going back to the other cottage. She couldn't continue to walk around on one heel, could she?

Limping out the door, she turned back to see if anyone was witnessing her sneak away. There, in the middle of the crowd, she saw Andrew looking at her, uneaten mini-carrot in one hand. His expression was unreadable, but the length of his stare left little doubt. He must have seen Thea's entire heel breaking accident.

Thea looked away quickly. She didn't want to see whatever played upon his face next. Would it be pity? Revulsion? Amusement? The thought of him laughing at her was too much too bear. Thea shut the door quickly and limped down the wooden stairs that led to the sand, kicking off the other shoe in digust. "What sort of an evil creature invented high heels anyway," Thea seethed as her feet found the sand. The beach had cooled in the evening and the pliancy of the sand felt almost soothing. "Ahhhh --" she began, sinking down onto the bottom step and pushing her feet out in front of her.

"It must have been a man," said a voice quite near.

Thea jerked her feet back. "What?" she asked, looking around. She thought that she was alone. "A man?"

"Yes," the voice said again, "A man must have invented high heels."

Thea turned to her right and made out the figure of a very tall person sitting between the pilings that held up the porch. He sat hunched in the darkness but the book that he held in his hands was illuminated from above by the porchlight. He appeared to have been reading.

"A very short man," he filled.

Thea stared at him further.

"Either that or a very sadistic man," he seemed to fumble around for additional conversation and Thea realized that he had been waiting for her to acknowlege him in some way.

Thea shook her head, "I'm sorry. I didn't think that there was anyone out here."

"I'm sorry if I scared you," the man looked back down at his book, using his thumb as a bookmark. "I just wanted to finish reading this. My sister recommended it to me. She likes Jane Austen."

Thea looked over at the cover and recognized the illustration a paperback copy of Persuasion. She inhaled in shock.

"Have you read it?" the man asked.

"It's one of my favorites," Thea admitted, looking over at his copy longingly. Last week, she had made a choice not to take her own copy of Persuasion with her on the trip to Nantucket. That decision now seemed painfully rash, one that had belonged to her aborted attempt to leave Andrew Carroll in the past and become a new person. Sitting on the steps of Drew's parents' porch wishing that she could find a way to steal this strange man's copy of Persuasion, Thea came to the realization that she would never really change.

"It's a good story," the man conceeded. "I didn't expect to like it as much as I did."

"You liked it?" she echoed, pulling her knees up to her chest and hugging them. It was getting cold outside.

"You really start to feel for Anne Elliot," the man elaborated. "At least I did."

"You don't have to tell me about that," Thea shook her head sadly.

The man looked over at her and smiled, "My sister tricked me into reading it," he revealed. "She told me that it was about a naval captain --"

"It is!"

The man held up his hand, "Yes, but she lead me to believe that at least part of the story would take place aboard ship!"

Thea opened her mouth to refute his statement but realized that no part of the story did. It was all English countryside and crowded Bath meeting rooms. "Well, Jane Austen wasn't a sailor --" she began.

"No, it's fine. It was a great story and I even became so interested that I skipped out of the party to finish it. But I was expecting something a bit different." the man put the book to one side and began to explain, "I'm with the film crew and my sister said that this might be a good book to read considering that we're filming about a female pirate from about the same period. I thought that it might give me a better sense of life aboard ship."

"Oh," Thea nodded her head in agreement. "Have you finished it?"

"Just as you walked out," the man admitted, "But I was planning on reading Wentworth's letter over again."

Thea exhaled as she recalled the words. She almost thought that she could recite it from memory. "I can listen no longer in silence..." she began quietly.

"You know it,"

"I know it." Thea said, shaking her head and feeling a lump form in her throat. The letter always brought a rise of emotion in Thea, feelings that were better left under the surface if she were to keep from dissolving into tears in front of this strange man. She tried to think of a way to change te subject. "I'm Thea," she chose to introduce herself.

"I'm Scott."

"What do you do on the film crew?" she asked, trying to sound interested.

"I'm one of the assistant directors."

"It must be very exciting to work on movie," Thea tried to enthuse, but heard herself sound half hearted.

"It can be, but it's mainly a great deal of waiting around for the right conditions. Perfect sunlight, perfect weather--" he trailed off.

"Still, filming in Ireland must have been nice!"

"It was. I had never been to Ireland." Scott looked over at Thea. He must have realized that she was shivering, something that she herself hadn't yet discerned. He stood up and walked over to her. "You're freezing," he stated.

"It's a little cold," Thea admitted rubbing her hands up and down the sides of her arms. "But I'm not going back into the party."

"Why not?" he asked.

Thea looked up at him. He seemed much taller standing up than he appeared hunched over the book a few moments ago. With his scruffy goatee and long blond hair pulled back in a rubber band, Thea could almost imagine him to be a person she would be fearful of meeting on a darkened street. But his eyes seemed to be full of concern for her.

"I broke my heel," Thea said, holding up the mangled stilleto. "I can't walk around on one heel."

"You could go barefoot," Scott reasoned. "No one would mind."

"My sister might," Thea shot back a little bitterly.

"No!" Scott scoffed, "she won't mind either, I'm sure." Then he thought further. "Unless it was her shoe?"

Thea nodded sheepishly. "It was her shoe."

"Well, I'm not in the habit of forcing people to do what they don't want to do, but are you just going to wait out here until they're ready to go home?" he asked.

"No!" Thea stood up now. She pointed down the beach to David and Diana's cottage. "I'm just going to limp back to their place."

"Do you need any help?"

Thea shook her head quickly. "No! I'll be fine!"

Scott looked down at her as if trying to figure out whether or not he should trust her on this. He smiled wanly and nodded his head. "Well then, it was nice meeting you." Scott held out his hand.

Thea shook it. "It was nice meeting you as well," she returned and found herself unconsiously glancing down at his copy of Persuasion.

Scott seemed to take the hint. "Would you like to take my copy?" he asked.

"Oh, I couldn't --" Thea negatived.

"No," Scott countered, placing the copy in her free hand. "You can. I think that you need it."

Part 8

Posted on Friday, July 17, 1998

Montclair, New Jersey. June 6, 1994

The wedding reception had progressed quickly after the tarragon chicken course. Thea soon found herself conversing easily with Drew and enjoying their discussion immensely. It was hard to believe that she had just met this man. It was almost as if they had managed to scale a wall together and found themselves at the top, looking down at the ground below and congratulating each other on their success. It was more reminiscent of a companionship founded over a period of time than a recent acquaintanceship.

By the time that the dessert plates had been cleared away, she had learned a great deal about David and his friendship with Drew, which seemed to stretch over many summers and almost as many sleepaway camps. Drew even revealed that he and David had been expelled from one camp for encouraging their bunk into a midnight raid of the candy stand and subsequent naked swim in the lake. Drew also appeared to be very interested in herself and Diana, asking as many questions as she.

By the time that the groom led the bride onto the dance floor, Thea was almost sure that she was starting to fall in love. Andrew was like no man Thea had ever met. He was funny without being sarcastic, cheerful without being insipid, and attractive without being vain. She was even learning to appreciate his forthright way of speaking and his quiet confidence. Drew seemed completely genuine and sincere, qualities that Thea had not seen before.

When the band leader asked the rest of the wedding party to join Diana and David on the dance floor, Thea was more than ready to let Drew escort her. Her heart began to skip beats as he took her hand in his. She could hardly bear to look at him but she couldn't bear to look anywhere else. She was starting to love his slow way of grinning that seemed to start as a light in his eyes and spread down to the corners of his mouth. He caught her into an embrace and pulled her towards him. She felt her arms fold around his neck as his arms encircled her. Her left hand rested below his shock of hair and she found herself pulling her fingers through it, caressing each separate curl.

She closed her eyes and let herself experience the sensation of being in his arms.

She opened her eyes only after the song ended and saw that he had been watching her. He smiled at her and she watched the corners of his eyes crinkle, seemingly pleased that she had enjoyed herself. Thea felt suddenly shy and looked away to regain her composure. It was then that she realized that several people were watching her from the side of the dance floor. She had been oblivious to them all.

She shuddered slightly at the thought of all those eyes upon her and Drew pulled her closer. "How is it that I feel so conspicuous when I'm with you?" Thea whispered to him.

"Why shouldn't you be conspicuous?" he replied teasingly. "Why shouldn't you be the center of attention?"

Part 9

Nantucket, Mass. June 14, 1998

Thea went to find her sister the next morning and located her alone on the porch sipping orange juice and watching Little David go back and forth in his swing. She walked over to her table, holding out the broken high heel sheepishly.

"Oh Thea," Diana said sadly, taking it in her hands and examining it.

"I'm sorry, Diana." Thea apologized. "I think that it can be fixed."

"There's a shoe repair shop in town," Diana nodded. "We can drive there after breakfast today." She put the shoe down on the table and motioned for her sister to sit down in a chair. "Is that why you left so early?" she glared at her sister in what Thea hoped was mock anger.

"I stayed for an hour." Thea replied cautiously, attempting to gauge her sister's mood. Was she really angry about the broken heel?

"I still don't understand why it was so difficult for you, Thea!" Diana shook her head in confusion. "You looked great in that dress!"

"I felt very uncomfortable in that dress!" Thea said evenly, trying to keep her composure.

"You'll become comfortable in time, you just need practice." Diana began to soothe, "Remember what I told you about feeling poised and confident." She looked down at the ruined shoe on the table. "You know, you really should wear these things more often in order to get used to them. Maybe we should find you a shorter heel to start with."

"I don't think that heels are really me," Thea started to hedge.

"Well, you have to suffer a little!" Diana retorted, "That's part of it."

"That's part of what?" Thea asked.

"Oh the game, the rules, the chase, the --" Diana began to elaborate.

"Trying to get a man to like you," Thea felt her eyes begin to roll.

"Yes," Diana said. "You have to dress the part."

"But what if the part is not me?"

"It will become you --" Diana began.

"No!" Thea nearly shouted, stopping Diana from going any further.

Thea sighed and looked over at her silenced sister. She wondered if attemting to explain herself was worth the argument that it would almost certainly create. Last night after she had left the party, Thea had reached a few conclusions. The first one was that she was not going to continue to imitate Diana. She realized that Diana had her own special charm that seemed to help her to carry off the high heeled she-devil look. Unlike her sister, Thea knew that she was not cut out to be a high heeled slayer of men. Diana's ability to look perfectly comfortable in miniscule dresses and stilletos had not rubbed off on her and it might be better if she attempted to find her own special appeal.

Thea also decided that her own special appeal didn't necessarily have anything to do with dressing like a school marm from the nineteenth century. She had to admit that Diana was right, she was far too "interesting" for that, and men should be pounding down doors in order to get to know her better!

But they would have to learn to like the real Thea instead of some cheap imitation copy of her sister.

And, even though Andrew Carroll happened to be living on the same small island for the next few weeks, she was definitely going to stop waiting for him. He was not going to come back. His behavior at last night's party made that only too brutally apparent. But he was not the only man on Nantucket and Thea was going to learn just how many potential fish there were in that deep blue sea.

After waking up that morning, Thea had spent the better part of an hour going through the clothes that she had brought with her, only hanging up those items that she liked herself and thought might be somewhat appealing to the opposite sex. There were not many that fit that description. Last night's green dress with roses was left in the suitcase along with a few other outfits that could be called "dowdy." The suitcase was placed at the back of the closet. Then, she picked out the best dress of the ones that had passed muster and put it on. It was a sleeveless light cotton shift made out of a blue and purple plaid. It was not that interesting but at least It was short enough to show off her legs and long enough to sit down in with ease. She put on her favorite pair of low-heeled sandals and started to brush out her light brown hair. She walked over to the mirror as she did so and looked at herself critically. Her hair, she had to admit, was a disaster. It was so long that she never knew what to do with it and frequently just pulled it back into a ponytail in order to keep it from whipping into her face. She gathered it up and held it back at the nape of her neck. The style did nothing to enhance her features. She raised her eyebrows skeptically and wondered if her nose was too large for her face. It had never seemed so before, but maybe it had grown in the last few years. She poked it with her finger in disgust. She didn't want to change her nose.

She looked at her dark brown eyes and allowed that they were large and attractive. She had to remember not to reduce them to slits by squinting in the sunlight She would need to purchase a good pair of sunglasses. Squinting also wrinkled up her forehead, which also looked very large in the glaring morning light. Had her forehead always been so tall?

This, she realized, could be camoflagued by hair.

But now, sitting across the table from Diana, she wasn't sure if she knew how to explain that morning's resolutions. Perhaps it would be better to be subversive. She didn't have to tell Diana that she had decided not to imitate her any longer or to take her fashion suggestions to heart. That might sound cruel. "I was wondering if you knew a good hair stylist?" Thea asked Diana, changing the subject abruptly. She helped herself to a glass of orange juice and attempted to sound nonchalant.

"A hair stylist?" Diana asked, looking at her sister questioningly.

"Yes," Thea said, "Is there one in town?"

"There is one in town," Diana affirmed, sounding mystified.

"Can you help me get an appointment?" Thea pressed. "For today? We can go in and get your shoe fixed as well."

Diana looked over at Thea's earnest face and took in the somewhat attractive purple dress. Thea watched as realization seemed to dawn in her sister's eyes. She seemed to understand.

"I think that can be arranged." Diana said, her smile widening.

Four hours later Diana and Thea left the salon and walked down Main Street towards the shoe repairers pushing Little David in the stroller. Thea could hardly imagine from where she had called up the nerve to let the stylist do what she did, but was on the verge of being very pleased that it had happened. It would take her a little longer to get used to the change. Even as they walked away from the salon, she pulled at a lock of her now auburn colored hair forward so that she could look at it further.

"It's a good color," Diana said, smiling.

Thea was almost ready to admit that it was. When the hair stylist had suggested that she go red, Thea was positive that she was going to turn out looking like Lucille Ball at best or Cyndi Lauper at worst. She had never colored her hair before and was almost too frightened to try it. But, with her sister looking on encouragingly and reminding her that she wanted to make a change and could always dye it back before school started, she had agreed. In the end, Thea was relieved to see that the reality was not nearly as brassy as she had imagined. It seemed actually very soft; richer, deeper in shade than her own mouse brown and much more interesting. Thea ran her fingers through it, appreciating the color and the texture.

"It's also a good length," Diana critiqued further.

Thea had to admit that the cut had also been successful. The stylist had shortened it considerably, layering it to curl right above her shoulders and frame her face. Her forehead and nose no longer looked so overwhelming. She raked her hand through it and realized that she wouldn't have to worry about ruining the style if she ran her fingers through it nervously. She whipped out her new pair of sunglasses and put them on, eyeing her sister playfully. "So, am I now stylish enough to be your sister?" she asked.

Diang giggled back, "Maybe you're too glamorous to be my sister." She bumped Thea with her hip. "I'm sure that all these people walking down the street are wondering why a Hollywood starlet like yourself is walking around with a mommy pushing a stroller."

Thea grinned wickedly and felt pleased. Diana's reaction was exactly what she needed to hear from her sister. She felt like skipping over the cobbled walk like a little child, undeniably happy for the first time since she had arrived on Nantucket.

"Oh look!" Diana said, pointing in the direction of the harbor. "There's the film crew."

Thea looked over and took in the unmistakable row of lights and tangle of cables that littered the other side of the street. Several small canopies had been set up and there were a few trailers and recreational vehicles parked near. A cluster of men appeared to be standing around a camera. A few others stood under one of the awnings, next to a large table of catered food.

"Let's go over and watch!" Diana squealed and began to push the stroller across the street.

Thea had no choice but to follow her lead, feeling less blissful and more apprehensive. She didn't feel like seeing Andrew again or Crystal.

But it might be nice to see Roslyn or Scott. She began scanning the crowd for either one and eventually spied Scott leaning over a clipboard and talkng to another person also carrying a clipboard. He had a headset on and she watched as Scott pulled his mouthpiece closer and began talking into it. He seemed to listen to the voice coming through the earpiece, nodding his head occasionally. Then, he seemed to relay the information to the other man who sped away writing vigorously on his clipboard as he went.

Thea watched the scene, completely confused. There seemed to be no filming going on at all. None of the people on the set were in what she might consider pirate costume either. In fact, most of the people on the set appeared to be either engaged in talking into their headsets or standing around looking bored.

She looked back at Scott and realized that he now fit into the bored category. He looked at his clipboard and began shaking his head in disgust. Then he placed the clipboard on the wall next to him and folded his arms. Thea decided to take a chance and see if he had time to talk to them.

"Scott!" she raised her voice and called.

Scott turned in her direction and looked at her, raising his dark sunglasses for a better look. He smiled in recognition, "Thea!" he said, walking over to her. "Good to see you again."

He was taller than she remembered, she had to crane her neck up to see him. "Did you meet my sister Diana last night?" Thea asked, gesturing to Diana.

"No, I didn't" Scott admitted.

"That's right, you were reading!" Thea recalled cheerfully. "His sister forced him to read Persuasion." Thea explained to Diana. Diana, for her part, seemed perplexed. Thea must have made more acquaintances at that party than she realized. Who was this person towering over them?

Thea introduced Little David and Scott bent down to look closer at the sleeping baby.

"What's going on right now?" Thea asked as he straightened.

"Absolutely nothing!" Scott said with some disgust. "Crystal's still in makeup and the other actors are in their trailers trying to keep their makeup from melting off. Andrew is about ready to have a fit and he is trying to hide his frustration by making last minute adjustments to the shot. He becomes a perfectionist whenever he has to wait."

Thea looked over at the huddle of people around the camera and thought that she could make out Drew's dark head in the middle of the group.

"What are you doing?" Thea asked.

"I'm holding up that wall over there," Scott deadpanned. "Very difficult business as I'm sure you can tell."

"Oh yes, a very difficult job, I'm sure," Thea smiled wryly.

"To make matters worse the executive producer has flown in from L.A." Scott furthered. "He's the suit standing over there talking to Skippy."

Thea looked over and saw the only man wearing a sports jacket and tie talking to the voracious clipboard writer from a few minutes before. "So that's Skippy." Thea commented. "Is that his real name?"

"No," Scott admitted, cracking a grin. "I just like to call him that. He's too eager."

Thea nearly snorted and looked back over at Skippy and the producer. Skippy was nodding his head vigorously, appearing to take every word to heart. Skippy nodded one last time and darted away probably to do whatever that man had suggested.

"It's always like this on the first day at a new location," Scott said sagely. "Hopefully, we'll pick up speed."

Thea attempted to look sympathetic while Diana squinted and looked in the direction of the knot of people around the camera. "Doesn't look like they're doing anything at all," Diana muttered.

The crowd of people near the camera seemed to agree with Diana's assumption and began to break apart, striding off in different directions, some to the trailers set up along the street. Thea watched as Drew emerged from the group. She saw him grimace unhappily and began walking over to the canopy where the producer from Los Angeles had seated himself. Thea noticed that Skippy had returned with a plate of fresh fruit from the catering van. This was placed on a stool next to the producer along with a bottle of Pellegrino and a glass.

"Only the best for the man who foots the bill," Scott whispered to Thea, commenting on Skippy's unctuous behavior. "I think that Skippy would bend down and lick the dirt off the man's boots if he thought that it would lead to faster career advancement."

Thea didn't bother to supress a giggle this time. She laughed openly at Scott's comment which was apparently loud enough to carry over to the canopy. Andrew and the other two men looked in their direction, in some confusion. Thea stopped quickly and bit her lip. She hadn't meant to draw attention to herself and felt her face grow hot. Diana took that opportunity to wave at Andrew. He seemed to recognize her and waved back.

"What's he doing over there?" Diana asked Scott.

"Trying to convince Connor Douglas to allow an extra week or two of filming." Scott revealed. "Andrew has this ridiculous idea about actually shooting one of the ship scenes during a rain storm. In order to do so, he has to have the flexibility to wait on the weather. He may be a great director, but he isn't God. Even he can't make it rain on cue."

"What ship?" Thea asked, looking at the harbor. She didn't see anything that would qualify as a ship.

"It isn't here yet." Scott said. "The HMS Rose. It's sailing up after a tall ship regatta in Glen Cove. It should be here next week. Once it gets here, there's at least a week of filming in fair weather and rehearsing the rain storm scene. After that, we'll just be waiting for some sort of squall to put out in."

"You mean that you'd be leaving the harbor in the rain?" Thea raised her voice, incredulous. She looked over at Scott in surprise.

Scott looked over in the direction of the two men under the canopy. Thea's comment seemed to have caught their attention again. Thea felt herself color as she realized it. "Not any kind of rain," Scott admitted. "A storm."

"That sounds really dangerous," Thea whispered, turning towards Scott. "Do you think that it's necessary?"

"No," Scott shook his head. "I don't. We'd be much better off attempting this on a sound stage, but Drew wants to go for something authentic and real."

"Authentic and real," Thea echoed, feeling a shiver of worry run up her spine.

"Oh! Here they come!" Diana hissed, pleased that Andrew appeared to be walking over to them with the producer from Los Angeles. Thea's eyes grew wide behind her dark sunglasses. She wondered why he was coming over. Was it just to be friendly to his best friend's wife or was he offended by what she had just let slip?

It was the producer who spoke first. "Scott!" he greeted the assistant director, clapping him on the back. "Frankie tells me that you've been showing him the ropes."

Scott straightened himself up and attempted to smile pleasantly at the man. "Of course Mr Douglas, anything for Skip -- I mean young Frank."

Andrew looked at Scott sternly. He didn't seem to like Scott's pet name for the boy. "In fact, I think that he could use a little help in the prop van." Drew didn't make it sound like a suggestion.

"Aye, Aye Captain," Scott agreed irreverantly and gave Thea a parting smile. It seemed that Scott wasn't easily intimidated by Andrew and Thea had to admit that she liked that about him. His bravado was quite impressive. She watched him walk away before turning back to Andrew and the producer.

The producer gave the two ladies a toothy smile, his gaze lingering a little bit longer on Thea than on her sister, although he directed his comment to Diana. "Andrew tells me that he grew up with your husband," the man said charmingly.

"That's right," Diana returned, looking thrilled to be meeting someone so apparently important.

Andrew seemed to realize that this was his cue to introduce them, "Diana, this is Connor Douglas. Connor, this is Diana Sullivan and her friend --" he trailed off, looking over at Thea and waiting for Diana to supply her friend's name.

Thea's mouth dropped open in shock. Did Andrew really not know who she was? Could it be that didn't recognize her again?

Thea pulled her sunglasses off and took over the introduction. "I'm her sister, Thea." she said sweetly, holding out her hand to Connor.

Connor shook it enthusiastically, "Lovely to meet you," he said, more to Thea than to Diana.

Thea avoided looking at Andrew but heard him attempt to recover the situation, "Of course," he spluttered, "Her sister Thea. Thea Moore."

Thea continued to look at Connor even as she noticed that Andrew at least managed to remember her last name. He appeared not to have forgotten her completely, just what she looked like. She would have shaken her head in disgust if she hadn't been more occupied in being more than civil to his executive producer. "So you're the producer of this film?" Thea said, smiling winningly.

"Yes," Connor returned with equal interest. "I sign Andrew's paycheck."

Part 10

Posted Monday, 20-Jul-98

Nantucket Island, MA: June 22, 1998

Thea spent the rest of the afternoon at the cottage alternately fussing over Baby David and mulling over what had occured at the film shoot. Confusion ruled in Thea's mind, barely checked by momentary instances of anger towards Drew for not recognizing her again and a dawning interest in both his assistant director and executive producer.

It was this relatively new and exciting feeling that Thea's mind strayed towards. Both Scott and Connor Douglas were very attractive men who, her sister Diana assured, seemed to appreciate her as well. Connor, Diana observed, had been very open about his admiration during the time they spent together. He hardly glanced at anyone else and completely ignored Andrew when he tried to reclaim his attention and talk about the shoot.

Of course, Diana rationalized, Thea had given him quite enough encouragement. Thea found it almost embarrassing to hear her sister describe how shamelessly she had flirted with the man, flattering him slightly with questions about the film and others that he had done. She had even accepted his invitation to sit with him under his canopy and allowed him to send Skippy for more mineral water and fruit.

In short, Thea was luring him in like an old pro and Diana could hardly believe that her shy little sister had managed it.

Thea could hardly believe it herself. She thought about attributing her new-found ability to the bottle of red dye that must have penetrated her scalp and began mutating brain cells. She had to admit that it was amazing what confidence a new hairstyle could give a person.

In her heart, though, she knew that her ability to impress and interest Connor Douglas had less to do with a change in appearance and more with her need to prove to Drew that she had also moved on. She couldn't care less about Andrew Carroll. To her, he was just another Hollywood wonk who dated young starlets to make himself feel younger.

He certainly was not the man she thought he was and was almost angry at herself for having spent the last four years pining over him. The new Thea no longer pined for any man. She would be a better judge of character. The new Thea would not give her heart away so easily! Connor Douglas, Scott (what was his name? -- she didn't know), or any other man would have to prove themselves worthy to walk away with her love!

But that didn't mean that she couldn't have a little fun with them first. After all, she did have four lonely years to make up for.

Connor Douglas seemed to be on the same hasty wave length as Thea. He drove up to the cottage that evening before it was even dark. Diana answered the door and invited him into the kitchen where Thea was busy attempting to make David smile by pulling every silly face she could imagine.

She looked up in mid grimace just as Diana led Connor into the room. Thea's eyes widened in surprise and she quickly wiped the ridiculous expression off her face. For all her confidence in his interest earlier that day, she hadn't expected that he would actually attempt to find her so soon.

He greeted her from the doorway and issued his invitation with an almost theatrical charm. "If Little David could spare his Aunt Thea, I should be pleased to have her as my dinner companion for the evening," he said cracking a wicked grin.

"Oh! Aunt Thea can be spared!" Diana answered for her quickly, crossing the room to take Little David off her hands. "David won't mind one bit."

Thea's empty hands flew to hair as she realized how messy she must look. Little David had been spitting up on the t-shirt that she had changed into after their trip to town. Diana had also helped her pull her hair into a clip so that Little David wouldn't continue to pull it into his tight little fingers. David had been partially successful: a few tendrils of hair had escaped and were left curling around her face. It was actually very attractive, more so than Thea realized.

Diana sidled up to her sister and poked her with her free elbow. It was all the prodding that she needed to accept. Thea took her hands away from her hair and put on what she hoped was a somewhat elegant smile. "That would be lovely," she purred. "Just give me a moment to change."

With that, she left the kitchen and headed for her room, mentally going through her wardrobe and quickly realizing that she had nothing in her closet that would be appropriate for what she hoped could be a very romantic evening.

Panic started to set in as she flipped through the hangers and could find nothing that could even be termed acceptable. Even though there was nothing truly elegant enough for dinner at what she assumed would be an expensive restaurant, a look out the window at the rented Lexus in the driveway confirmed that supposition, Thea had hoped that there might be something scandalous enought to warrant his attraction to her. Thea momentarily forgot that she never purchased anything too racy.

She was almost ready to pull out the suitcase and put on the horrid green dress with the pink roses when Diana rushed into the room.

"I know that you hated the little black number yesterday," Diana began, holding up another dress from her closet. "But I think that you might like this."

Thea silently thanked God for her sister's sensitivity and seemingly limitless closet. She grabbed it and began to put it on without another thought. Diana was right, she did like it. While it was somewhat short and definitely low-cut, it had a matching jacket cut from a sheer, silky material. It was midnight blue and was cut impeccably well. Thea almost sighed with relief.

"And you can wear these," Diana announced, brandishing a pair of low heeled sandals. "These are hip enough to wear with that, yet stable enough to dance in."

"I don't think that we'll be doing any dancing," Thea commmented as she placed the shoes on her feet. "But at least these look sturdy enough for me not to destroy."

Diana helped Thea take her hair down from the clip and style it quickly when Thea attempted to brush on enough mascara and lipstick to make herself look dangerous.

She was out of the room within ten minutes, which Diana believed was record time for any woman with an important date ahead. She herself would have taken at least thirty regardless of how long the man had been waiting or what time reservations were scheduled.

The gravity of what she was doing didn't dawn on Thea until she was seated in his car and travelling into town. This realization made her instantly shy around him. It was one thing to flirt and act charming during the adrenalin rush of anger towards a former boyfriend, it was completely different in the quiet, intimate seating of a car. Thea was not sure if she had what it took to be interesting through the entire drive, let alone dinner. This was a very sobering thought.

Connor seemed to take no notice of Thea's change in spirits and began the conversation easily. "I had the worst time getting your address," he revealed.

Thea was perplexed. "How did you find it?" she asked.

"I eventually weaseled it out of Scott." Connor grinned, "And he was only able to give me directions to your neighbor's house, not even a phone number. So I couldn't call you before taking my chances and presumptiously showing up on your doorstep."

Thea wondered momentarily why Scott would be so willing to give Connor her address. She pushed it out of her mind, deciding to think on that later. She needed her full attention for a conversation with Connor.

She looked over at him and began to admire his profile. He had a very strong jawline, with the kind of chin that always gives the impression of courage and spirit. Thea also liked the way that his dark, thick hair was parted on the side and swept away from his forehead. He appeared to be in his thirties, very young for such an important position. Thea assumed that this should be taken as a testament to his skill and intelligence.

Connor looked over and caught Thea in a gaze of open admiration. He smiled at her and looked pleased.

"Drew flat out refused to give me your number," Connor said.

"Really?" Thea asked surprised. She was completely flummoxed by this piece of information. Why would Andrew care?

"Yes," Connor affirmed. "Did you and he grow up together or something?"

"No," Thea shook her head. "He did grow up with my brother-in-law, but I actually only met him four years ago at my sister's wedding."

"That's odd," Connor commented, "Because he seemed very protective of you, in a big brother sort of way."

"He acted like that?"

"Yes, definitely." Connor shook his head and looked over at her. "It's almost as he thought I was a danger to you," he said darkly.

Thea looked back at him, confused by his revelation, but determined not to let it show. "And are you?" she asked playfully.

"Maybe," Connor drew out the word into two long syllables. "Maybe not."

"I'll just have to wait and see," Thea said lightly, turning her attention back to the road.

"Yes, wait and see," Connor chuckled as they drove into town.

Thea was not mistaken, Connor did take her to what appeared to be the most expensive restaurant in town, the kind where only one menu listed the prices. Thea sat straight in her chair and pretended to study the entree selections on her own price-silent one, but was really gazing at Connor over the top of her menu. He was really very handsome, almost in a "silver screen" way. Connor, Thea suspected, would have fit in perfectly with the likes of Cary Grant, Humphrey Bogart, and Clark Gable. He had the good looks to play the romantic hero, yet he also seemed to have an unaffected sense of humor and humility that Thea found irresistable. It was a lethal combination in a man.

Fortunately for Thea, Connor also never seemed at a loss for conversation. He elaborated on the script of 'The Pirate Queen,' revealing himself to be quite an expert on the subject of little-known female pirates like Anne Bonney. He talked about the cost and difficulties of hiring a working reproduction of a Revolutionary War ship like the HMS Rose. He even spoke about the frustrations of working with prima donna directors and casts.

"And, would you consider Andrew to be such a difficult director?" Thea asked candidly, not exactly sure what she wished the answer to be.

"Well, he's certainly not in the same league as James Cameron, Connor qualified, "But this scheme of his to take the Rose out during a thunderstorm doesn't seem rational."

"Why do you think that he's insisting upon it?" Thea mused out loud.

"I can tell you why," Connor returned. "Competition. These directors are always pushing one another to greater feats of cinematic daring. They all want to go down in the annals of movie making as the only one who attempted to do this or the first one to do that. Cameron had to build a ship and sink it. Carroll has to put a crew and vessel in jeporady by getting a few shots during a wicked nor'easter. They're all a bunch of babies."

"So, you don't believe that it has anything to do with wanting to make it look more authentic." Thea asked.

Connor shook his head, "Authentic? You've seen what these special effects guys are capable of. Heck, they've destroyed New York City three times this summer. He could have made it look authentic without it having to be authentic."

Thea felt a twinge of embarrassment for Andrew rise. His producer didn't seem to have the greatest opinion of him.

"Don't get me wrong, I love the guy," Connor said, "But I can't have a set full of crew members waiting around for a thunderstorm." They didn't even do that on 'Twister'."

"So, you aren't going to let him wait for a storm?" Thea asked.

Connor shook his head. "We comprimised. I told him that he could have one extra week but not two. If a storm blows in during that week, then he's a lucky man. If not --" he let the question hang in the air.

"How does Crystal Sloane feel about this?" Thea asked, wondering if that actress would really want to put her life in danger in the name of authenticity.

Connor looked surprised. "You don't know much about her, do you?"

Thea shook her head. She had never paid much attention to the personal lives of movie stars, and tried to avoid learning more about Crystal once she had learned that she was dating Drew.

Connor swallowed a bite of lobster salad and leaned closer to Thea, "She's a daredevil herself," he whispered conspiratorily. "She always does her own stunts. She's fearless when it comes to them. You can't talk her into using a stand-in. One day, I tried to convince her that something might eventually happen to that pretty face of hers, but she just laughed it off," he shook his head sadly. "She really thinks that she's invincible. It wouldn't surprise me to learn that she was really behind this thunderstorm scheme, not Drew."

Thea's mouth dropped in surprise. "She seems so --" she searched for an appropriate word. "So dainty."

Connor guffawed loudly. "Dainty? Hardly." He paused and seemed to reflect on Crystal. "She is the Pirate Queen, you know. Andrew wrote the script for her."

"He did?"

"Yes," Connor said, "Choosing to use Anne Bonney as a real life model was an after thought. This film has always been hers."

Thea swallowed, "They must have been involved for quite some time," she concluded, trying not to look as if this information pained her. Thea wasn't sure why it still stung. Surely everything that had occured in the last two days should have created an immunity in her.

"Long by Hollywood standards, I guess," Connor considered, "About six months. Drew started working on the idea before they became intimate."

"But he's admired her for quite some time," Thea tried to thrust the dagger into her heart further.

Connor laughed openly, "Darling, everyone in Hollywood has admired her for 'quite some time'!"

Thea smiled wanly, trying to grab some of Connor's spirit while reminding herself that she was not in competition with Crystal Sloane. Crystal was completely out of her league and Thea was determined to no longer care about Drew. She let that thought roll around in her head, trying to find a place where it would fasten securely.

After dinner, Connor suggested that they walk down towards the wharf. The lights from the sailboats flickered on the harbor and Thea, enchanted by the beauty of the sight before her, couldn't be bothered to glance at the other people walking the street. She almost walked into another person, a mistake that seemed to humor Connor. He laughed quietly and used it as an excuse to grab onto her hand. "I'm going to have to help you keep from being run over, aren't I?"

Thea felt a surge of happiness tickle her stomach and wondered if she should attribute her giddy unconcern for the others on the street to the three glasses of wine Connor had encouraged her to consume. But Connor didn't seem to be waiting for an explanation.

They walked along farther, Thea silently appreciating the sensation of her hand in his, when she heard him curse under his breath. "Is he following us?" he questioned, causing Thea to look around.

Walking on the other side of the street was Drew. Thea momentarily wondered what he was doing there and if Crystal was not far behind.

"Here," Connor stopped in front of a bar called the Rose and Crown. "Let's lose him."

Connor opened the door, allowing a blast of music to pour out onto the street. Connor shrugged and pulled her inside.

Thea looked around the bar as Connor led her over to a discreet table in the corner as far away from the door as possible. The music continued to pound at Thea's ears and she glanced around to find its source as Connor attempted to shout a drink order at the waitress who appeared at their table. A juke box was lit up at the center of the room and a small cluster of people surrounded it, happily feeding it quarters.

Connor turned back to Thea and started speaking. She couldn't hear a word he said.

"What?" Thea shouted back, glancing over at the juke box. The Rose and Crown certainly was not the place for an intimate discussion.

Connor seemed to realize that as well and shook his head, a slow grin playing on his face. Thea wished that they were still walking towards the wharf.

There was a brief respite from the attack of sound between the end of one song and the beginning of another. Thea opened her mouth, wanting to take advantage of the relative silence, but not knowing exactly what to say.

The next song began and Thea watched as Connor's eyes lit up. It was obviously familiar to him and that he liked it. Either that or he was struck with an immediately brilliant idea. Thea couldn't tell which had occured but it seemed to induce Connor to stand up. He turned around to Thea and held out his hands, mouthing the words, "Would you care to dance?"

Thea's eyes widened, incredulous. "Dance?" she mouthed back, suddenly shy again. Thea had never been much of a dancer.

Connor nodded his head approvingly and grabbed one of her hands, pulling her from behind the table. Thea looked over towards the juke box and saw that there were two other couples dancing around with inebriated abandon.

Thea closed her eyes and began to wish that she had accepted that fourth glass of wine. She wasn't used to making a conscious decision to act like a fool. Ridiculous behavior for Thea was either by accident or due to large quantities of sangria.

Connor was already in motion, though, and Thea couldn't figure out how to refuse him without causing a scene. She certainly couldn't explain herself by shouting above the din.

Thea closed her eyes and allowed herself to be guided by him. Soon, she was concentrating not on her predicament, but on the song itself and how the relentless pulse made her feel. "It's called 'The Way' by Fastball." Connor shouted in her ear.

It was a fun song. Thea felt her feet moving and opened her eyes and looked down to see Connor's doing the same. She imitated his steps in reverse, combining with him into a sort of two-stepped shuffle, hands together, pushing and pulling each other across the floor.

Then the music changed subtly and Thea followed Connor as he started moving his arms to the beat. The juke box blared, "Anyone can see the road that they walk on is paved in gold --" as Thea watched her partner, attempting to figure out how he managed to make such ridiculous movements look natural and almost sexy. "It's always summer, they'll never get cold --" Out of the corner of her eyes, Thea watched another dancer shake her finger teasingly at her partner. "They'll never get hungry, they'll never get old and gray --" whistled the juke box. "You can see the shadows wandering off somewhere --" Connor synched the words along with the singer, putting his hands on Thea's hips and moving her with him. "They won't make it home, but they really don't care." Thea tentatively placed her own hands on Connor's shoulders. "They won't leave the highway. They're happier there today -- Today!"

The singer held onto a long note and Connor took advantage of the musical opportunity to spin himself around with Thea, dizzying her completely.

The verse started over and Thea found herself going back into their two-stepped shuffle, but this time she felt less inhibited, less self-conscious. As the verse wound to the familiar chorus, Thea felt herself loosen up, shaking her finger at Connor seductively when the singer repeated the phrase, "They won't make it home, but they really don't care."

Connor shook his head and raised his eyebrows in disbelief, obviously pleased that she was beginning to enjoy herself. He reached out for her with both hands and pulled her close. Thea felt her knee forcing itself between his legs.

With a momentary lapse of all sanity, Thea took her other leg and wrapped it daringly around his. Then she allowed herself to fall back into a chest exposing dip. She gasped audibly, hardly able to control the wave of feeling washing over her as he lifted her back towards him. It was an absolutely divine, heady feeling that could not be attributed to dizzyness or having drunk too much wine. It had everything to do with being in the arms of a powerfully attractive man.

The music ended, but it didn't matter, Thea remained locked in Connor's strong embrace. She looked into his eyes and felt herself grow weak.

Connor placed his hand on the back of her neck and pulled her closer towards him. Thea realized what was going to happen a moment before their lips met in a hot and satisfying kiss.

Eventually, Thea pulled away, almost numb and completely exhausted. She looked away from Connor in order to recover some degree of composure. When her eyes began to focus again, she saw someone glaring at them from the entryway.

It was Andrew Carroll.

Part XI

Posted on Saturday, 25-Jul-98

New York City: June 11, 1994.

Before the bride and groom had left for their honeymoon, Andrew had asked Thea out. One of his projects was to be presented in a film festival at NYU and, while he wasn't quite sure if Thea would enjoy seeing his documentary or any of the others being screened on that day, he attempted to bribe her with a good dinner and an evening in New York City.

The bribe wasn't necessary. Thea was very interested in seeing Andrew again, regardless of the conditions, although she imagined that spending a few hours watching the mind numbing creations of earnest film school students ranked somewhat below a visit to the dentist. Thea was a woman not easily impressed.

She drove herself into the city so that Drew wouldn't have the difficulty of an hour long commute to Montclair and back in order to pick her up. Surprisingly, traffic into the city was very light. The drive was easy and she even managed to find a decent spot to park near Washington Square.

Drew was waiting for her in front of the theater and Thea experienced a momentary twinge of anxiety. What if they felt awkward around each other? Would Drew still be as interested as he appeared at the wedding?

She shouldn't have worried, as soon as he noticed her walking down the street, he smiled broadly and started towards her, greeting her with a comfortably unassuming kiss on the cheek. Thea's heart calmed down. He was the same warm, interesting man that she had met at the wedding.

He directed her into the theater and helped her into a seat in the rear of the theater. He handed her his presentation list as they had sat down. There were to be three films, all documentaries shot around New York City. Andrew's was first.

"What's it about?" Thea asked, reading the title off the bill -- 'Times Square Underground'.

"Oh, well --" Drew began, sounding uncharacteristically embarrassed. "I filmed lots of subway performers at the Times Square station."

Thea nodded her head, wondering if he would go on with his explanation if she waited for it. She was surprised at how unsure he sounded and how uncomfortable he suddenly looked. It was a far cry from the man who had casually informed her that he was in line to win an Academy Award. She didn't know how to account for his change in demeanor. "That must have taken a great deal of time," Thea commented, hoping that he would continue.

Drew grimaced. "I didn't see the sun for a full month."

"Really?"

"Well, I wanted to get a range of performers and --" Drew let his explanation drift off as the lights began to dim.

The film began and Thea gave it her full attention, wanting to find it interesting. She really wanted to appreciate his work and sensed that this film might mean something to him.

Thea was quickly amazed by the diversity of performers that Andrew had filmed. There was everything from a woman dressed in a long black skirt, white blouse and gloves, and broad brimmed hat moving so slowly that it appeared as if she was the "Living Doll" she had billed herself to be, to steel drummers, to a lone violinist playing 'Ave Maria'.

Thea really appreciated the ingenuity of a trio of young girls dancing to Janet Jackson songs in front of a hand-lettered poster that asked people to help them buy tickets to their first concert and adored a quartet of jazz musicians fronted by an amazing blues guitarist.

She began to notice that Drew liked to pay as much attention to the spectators as he did to the performers. His camera followed business women in sneakers and panty hose rummaging through large bags for pieces of change and men in suits and ties barging past with a look of irritation flickering through their eyes.

Then Thea noticed that there was one particular spectator that Andrew had filmed more than once. It was an old woman. Her dark skin was wrinkled, and Thea could tell that she was missing quite a few teeth. She wore her hair tied up in a red kerchief and carried several filled grocery bags. Thea watched as she shuffled to the music, a rapt look on her face. She was the only one who clapped at the end of the lone violinist's solo and the only one besides Andrew who seemed to watch the entire dance of the Janet Jackson wannabes.

Thea started to watch for her in the milling crowds surrounding the other acts. It was almost like the documentary version of 'Where's Waldo?" Thea could pick her out easily, her red kerchief making her distinctive and conspicuous.

Thea began to wonder about her as the film progressed. Did she live in the station or go to a shelter at night? Did she beg for money or go to soup kitchens? How did she manage to survive? She started to worry for her and almost began to wish that she wasn't there. Her presence offended Thea as much as it intrigued her. The woman made her feel guilty for having such a comfortable life.

As the film progressed, Thea noticed that the woman seemed to be more listless and tired. She leaned against posts near the performers instead of bopping around happily within the crowds.

Thea camera cut to the inside of a subway car and the filming became jerky, unlike what had come before. Thea sensed that the camera was no longer on a tripod. Was Andrew holding it in his hand? The shot spun around and eventually focused down the length of the car, coming to rest on the red kerchiefed woman. She was holding onto the pole of the swinging subway car with one hand, her grocery bags with the other. Thea noticed that the people sitting in the car were avoiding looking directly at the woman. This was painfully obvious in some cases -- a woman stared almost too intently at the paperback in her hand but did not turn the page. A man kept on glancing at his wristwatch every few seconds.

The woman in red shuffled closer to the camera, oblivious to the fact that it was the only thing actively following her. Thea could tell that she was singing, but her song wasn't discernible over the roar of the subway. Eventually, a thin, light melody began to sound above the noise. It sounded as if it had been recorded at a different time and dubbed in during the editing. It wasn't in sync with the words that the woman was mouthing, but it was very apparent that it was her song. It could belong to no one else, yet it was so unlike what Thea expected from the woman. Thea had imagined that she would have a rough, deep voice. One made gravelly with age. This was an almost ethereal soprano, tuneful and lovely.

The camera watched as a few people grudgingly handed her a few coins and followed her onto the platform at the next station. The woman's song continued, even as she walked onto the next car, doors closing behind her.

There was only one performer after that, a Indian man playing the tabla near a newsstand. The camera watched as the man calmly spinned out his rhythmic repetition. Thea listened to it with little patience. She couldn't find the woman and wanted to know where she was. Then, the camera began to focus on a spot of red laying on the concrete platform near a large garbage bin. The camera zoomed in on it until it became recognizable as the woman's kerchief.

Thea gripped the armrests of her seat as she heard the woman's song begin to intermingle with the Indian raga. It unnerved her completely. That was her kerchief but where was she?

The high, light song grew louder as the camera began searching through the station, looking for the woman in the crowds. The camera picked up speed, frantic, rushing around as the melody resonated and added to the frenzy.

Just as quickly, the film ended and the words 'In memory of Etta Mae Fowler' flashed white on the screen. Thea gasped and felt like sobbing. Her name must have been Etta Mae. She couldn't believe that the woman had died. She had grown so attached to her in the span of one hour and there were so many things that she wished that she had learned about her. She wished that someone had helped her.

Thea looked over and saw that Drew was similarly affected. For a moment his emotion surprised Thea, but then she realized that he had spent a month watching the woman only to have her die in the end. It must have been infinitely worse for him, discovering the kerchief and having to figure out what had happened.

She wondered if they could leave the theater without watching the other two documentaries. She didn't have the heart to watch anything else. All she wanted to do was leave.

In the darkness, Drew looked over at her and tried to smile. It was a painful, half-hearted effort. "I wasn't sure what you would think of it," Drew whispered to her.

"It was amazing," she breathed.

He exhaled and looked relieved. "That means a great deal to me," he said, putting his hand over her own.

Thea barely watched the other two documentaries, her mind filled with all the questions that she wanted to ask him. Did he ever meet Etta Mae? What had he learned about her? How did she die?

But those questions didn't seem as important at the end of the evening. She looked over at Drew as the lights came on in the theater and people began to pick up their bags and exit. He looked heartsick, and she realized how inappropriate it would be to prod him about Etta Mae. There would be time for that later. He needed to be comforted right now. Without further thought, Thea sat on the armrest next to him and placed her arm on his shoulders.

"Sorry," Andrew said huskily, looking embarrassed but unable to control his grief. "I made it half a year ago. I had forgotten how," he searched for a word, "upsetting it was to lose her."

"Don't be," Thea whispered back. "It was a beautiful tribute to her. It must have taken time to get it just right."

He nodded sadly.

"And you're right," Thea continued, kneeling down to look into his face, "You do have talent."

Part XII

Nantucket Island, MA: June 23, 1998

The twenty-four long stemmed roses were delivered to the cottage the next afternoon, just as Diana and Thea were setting off for town. The flowers were from Connor Douglas and managed to give Diana a better idea of how Thea's date the evening before had gone. Diana had been plumbing her for just that kind of information all morning, but had little success. Thea was not forthcoming with any particulars other than that she had a very nice time and did not break her sister's shoes while dancing.

"Well, he must have had a nice time as well," Diana commented dryly as her sister transferred the flowers from the box to a vase. "Men always send roses after they have had a nice time."

Thea ignored her, smiling inwardly at her sister's attempt to elicit information from her, but her mind was much too unsettled to feel comfortable divulging many details. And it was not that those details were so sordid, little happened beyond that one, amazing kiss on the dance floor, but she had not yet figured out how she felt about it. She was almost glad that Connor had left for L.A. that morning and wasn't scheduled to return for an entire week. She needed the time to think.

But it was thrilling to receive the flowers, especially when she realized that he must have had to go out of his way to order them before he boarded his plane.

"Won't you at least show me the card?" Diana whined further.

"Is it addressed to you?" Thea teased, holding the card close to her chest.

"Are you ever going to tell me anything?"

"Maybe later," She placed the last stem in the vase and put the arrangement on the table.

"When?" Diana continued, following close on her heels.

Thea turned around and tried to think of something ridiculously flip to say, but couldn't. "When I've thought of what it is I want to tell you," she said with uncharacteristic honesty, then getting her purse and pushing her sister out the door.

Diana had created an excuse to go into town that afternoon, but Thea suspected that her real reason was to visit the film shoot again. Diana had turned out to be a real Hollywood groupie, completely fascinated with anything that had to do with making movies. She had been full of questions yesterday afternoon and began spouting off film terms like a pro half an hour later. Thea sensed that this was just one of many trips to the film shoot that she would be making in the next few weeks.

Thea didn't know how she felt about that either. Part of her wanted to see Andrew again, if only to see how he would react to her today. She still wondered if she had imagined that he had been standing in the doorway to the Rose and Crown last night, watching her kiss Connor. He had disappeared in the moment that she had looked away and Connor had not seen him at all.

Had he been there last night? Why?

Thea placed this mystery out of her head on the drive into town and focused on Connor Douglas. She found herself trying to recall his face, but could only commit to outlines of it, dark hair falling on his forehead and a cleft in his chin. She wished that she could call up the wicked grin that she knew he possessed, or his eyes which she believed were dark and deep. Was she remembering them incorrectly, though? She couldn't be sure.

All that she knew with any degree of certainty was that he was intriguing and interesting. He fascinated her and Thea did not mind being fascinated.

The drive into town was shorter than she had remembered, and soon Diana was helping Thea to find a parking space one block away from where they both knew the film crew was shooting. Diana had still not mentioned her desire to go to visit it, still attempting to be coy. Thea almost thought about suggesting that they forget the errand and go directly there.

But neither mentioned that thought, and it was a half an hour before they arrived at the cluster of trailers along Main Street. Like the day before, Thea could not tell that any filming was occurring. The same cluster of people grouped around the camera, although Scott was with them this time. She saw Skippy pouring a can of soda into a glass under the catering tent and, again, there were no actors on the set.

The door to one of the trailers was open and Thea could see Roslyn inside.

"I'm going to say hello to Roslyn," Thea whispered to Diana, who was intent upon the camera and only nodded.

Thea knocked on the door before she mounted the stairs. Roslyn stopped working long enough to turn around, recognize Thea, comment on the change in hair color, and welcome her into the trailer. Roslyn pushed her towards a seat along a wall.

"I'm just getting ready to work on Crystal again," Roslyn explained, gesturing to a door at one end of the narrow room. "She's in there with the dresser right now, sewing up another tear in her petticoat. Crystal ruins costumes."

"I heard that, Roslyn!" shouted an annoyed voice from the other side of the door.

Roslyn smirked. "If you'd be more careful about the costumes or your make-up, we wouldn't be waiting through all of this downtime," she called back, not amused.

Roslyn turned back to Thea and explained, "This is the third time today that we've had to stop filming and fix Crystal back up."

The door opened and Crystal emerged from the other room, wearing a period costume with a heavy skirt and woolen shawl. She looked hot, uncomfortable, and annoyed. Nothing like the demure actress that she had watched from a distance at the party.

"Roslyn," Crystal began, "the script has me being chased down the cobblestone street and diving behind a row of barrels. It's a very physical scene! And you expect me to preserve my dress and make-up so that I won't make more work for you?"

"You could allow a stand-in --" Roslyn began tiredly but was quickly silenced by Crystal's loud huff. It sounded like an old argument, one that was never to be settled between them.

Crystal looked over and noticed Thea sitting along the wall. She seemed to add the next part for her benefit. "I always do my own stunts," she said imperiously. With that, she sat down in front of the mirror. "I'm ready," she signaled to Roslyn. "And this time don't put so much dirt on my nose."

Roslyn stood up and calmly walked over to the actress. She began to open up jars of powder and paint with deliberate hesitation. "All right," Roslyn purred dangerously.

Thea watched Roslyn carefully, remembering what she had said at the party about make-up artists having the upper hand. She was pretty sure that Crystal was not going to like the result of crossing Roslyn.

Roslyn ignored Crystal and continued to talk to Thea. "So, what have you being doing with yourself?" she asked.

"Mainly spending time with my sister and nephew," Thea admitted. "Pretty dull but fun."

"There's nothing to do on this island at night," Crystal interjected, sighing for effect. "I went to sleep early last night because I was so bored."

"Where was Andrew?" Roslyn asked suggestively.

"Oh, Andy said that he had to scout around for more locations." Crystal replied. "He asked me to go, but there's nothing I hate more than location scouting."

Andy? Drew hated to be called Andy! Thea listened closely. So he was scouting for locations last night. That might explain his presence on the street, but not in the doorway of the Rose and Crown. Its cable televisions and juke box weren't exactly in keeping with the film's eighteenth century setting.

"Do you know if he found anything?" Thea heard herself ask.

"I have no idea," Crystal sighed heavily. "I didn't care to ask."

Thea leaned back in her chair, thoughtful. Didn't film crews generally choose their locations before filming began?

Scott poked his head into the trailer to ask Roslyn when Crystal might be ready.

"A few minutes," Roslyn said, without looking up.

"Thea!" Scott said, seeming to notice her out of the corner of his eye. He looked at her closely. "How are you?"

She was about to reply when Crystal interrupted her. "Oh Scott darling!" she exclaimed, turning her head away from Roslyn's careful brush. "Would you be so kind as to bring me an iced tea with lemon?"

Scott turned towards her and acquiesced quickly, "Of course, Crystal," he almost whispered, as she gave him one of her trademark smiles.

Thea watched closely. It was obvious that Scott was in love with Crystal Sloane! Thea, by now, was an old pro at knowing the look of a heartsick individual and Scott appeared to be awash in his own besottedness. Scott left to do her bidding and Thea began to realize just how impossible his situation was and how difficult it must be to bear. She no longer wondered why he responded so sarcastically to Andrew the day before or even why he had snuck away from the party in order to finish the final chapter of Persuasion. He couldn't stand to be around his rival.

Thea felt an even greater kinship with the unfortunate assistant director. It was an emotional bond that went beyond interest or even sympathy.

She looked back at the object of his affection and shook her head sadly. Crystal didn't deserve such pure affection and disinterested devotion. What was she other than a beautiful face and a reckless spirit? It was true that she could be charming when she wished to be, but it would always be on the surface. Thea doubted Crystal's ability to feel deeper emotion.

How could Andrew love such a shallow creature? Thea blushed deeply as she recalled this fact. Could it be that Thea's past interest in him colored her opinion of Crystal? Was she being more critical than was necessary?

Thea pushed the idea away. No, her judgment was not impaired. She was no longer interested in Andrew. He hardly mattered to her at all.

But still it was surprising that a man who had been affected by the death of a homeless woman who sang in subway cars for her subsistence should be so easily content with the surface charms of Crystal Sloane.

Thea watched Roslyn as she worked on Crystal. Thea was impressed by the artist's amount of concentration and didn't interfere by speaking. Crystal didn't talk either, but sat staring into the mirror, a blank, almost vacuous expression on her face.

Scott returned with the iced tea and Roslyn pronounced Crystal finished. Crystal stood up from the chair and turned away from the mirror. Just as she was getting ready to walk down the stairs, Roslyn stopped her. "One last thing," she said, reaching out with one finger and rubbing a smudge of dirt above her left eye and onto the eyelid. The effect was not attractive. It made her look as if she had been punched in the face. Crystal didn't bother to check in the mirror, but walked out the door, rolling her eyes in disgust. "Get it right the first time, Roslyn," she said haughtily.

Roslyn looked over at Thea, who had raised an eyebrow knowingly.

"Well, it wasn't her nose!" she defended.

"Nope," Thea smiled.

Roslyn shook her head, "Ah, well, you've gotta have a little fun."

Continued In Next Section