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Chapter 30
New York City
William stared at Melissa blankly, "I'm sorry...what'd you say?" He couldn't believe his ears and didn't trust himself enough to be sure he'd heard right.
"I said...Georgiana is waking up!" Melissa repeated emphatically. "I just got a call from the house. It's true! She really is."
William still looked at her doubtfully, then stole a glance at Liz, who was looking at them curiously. "Are you sure?"
"Of course I am!!!" Melissa said excitedly. "Oh Will! It's so exciting!" And she jumped into his arms for an embrace.
Now fully convinced, William was too happy to care about Melissa's behavior. He felt giddy, just like a teenager. He wanted to sing and dance and jump. Most of all, he wanted to see his sister. "Let's go then...what're we waiting for?" He looked hopefully at Liz, "Can you come?"
Liz wished she could, she really did, but... "I'm sorry, William...It's Rachel's bed time, I can't leave her here alone. But I really want to see Georgie too. I'll visit her soon." She looked at him as if to express her feelings. "I'm so happy for you."
"Thanks," he said, smilingly. "I'll tell her you'll come later."
"Yes, please...do that."
William left the kitchen with Melissa hanging on his arms. Everybody in the house left for William's to visit Georgiana, leaving Liz alone with Rachel and a lot of time to think. She was very, very happy about Georgiana. There was no doubt about that. Now they'd be able to find out more about what exactly happened that night. Like William, Liz believed that George Wickham was involved in it, but as a lawyer, she knew that she'd need more than her instincts...she needed facts. And that's what Georgiana could probably give.
Liz couldn't help but wonder about William's behavior towards her. He had been more than friendly...attentive was more like it. He'd been nice to Rachel and she adored him. And of course, Liz couldn't forget what he'd said right before the "witch" came in. He'd said that he'd be happy to be Rachel's father if she'd let him. Let him! Ha! If he only knew!
She couldn't bring herself to take his words seriously. No, that would not do. He'd only said that to make Rachel feel better. She was pretty sure of that. No, he couldn't possibly mean that...Liz knew better than that. She'd not hold him to it. Now that his sister was out of coma, he'd probably spend all his time with her till she fully recovered. And besides, what right did she have on him anyway...having rejected him.
And there was always her... 'condition', as Liz preferred to call it. The thought of that made her remember that she'd have to tell Jane pretty soon. It wasn't a pleasant prospect, but it would have to be done. Liz was still coming in terms with it herself...but she figured that having someone to share it with would not be so bad. However, she'd have to swear Jane to secrecy...she didn't want the whole world to know...especially William...not yet.
Meanwhile, at William's house
Georgiana's room was like a mini-clinic with numerous medical instruments, etc for constant monitoring of her condition. It had an air of a hospital about it. For William, it was the worst room of the house because it symbolized his sister's mortality. He never entered it without a hope of her improved situation and never left without despair. It was his library and office because he spent almost all of his free time at home there. That was his only comfort...being close to his beloved Georgie.
And now entering the room again, he couldn't help but thank god for returning his sister back to him. For indeed, siting propped up in the bed, was Georgiana. William positively beamed. "Georgie?"
She looked up and for a moment, stared at him blankly. And William's heart sank as he feared the worst. Amnesia? Or permanent brain damage even? But then, she smiled, "William!"
William sighed and laughed slightly at his paranoia. But then, who could blame him...after all he'd been through. He sat next to Georgie and hugged her for several minutes, just holding her close, being protective. "Oh Georgie!" Was all that he could utter. He looked over her shoulder at Dr. Lumberton, who'd been coming regularly to monitor Georgie. Dr. Lumberton smiled encouragingly.
William smiled back. He said to Georgie, "Glad to have you back, Georgie."
Georgie just smiled, "What day is it William?"
"February 7, 1999."
"It's been that long!" she exclaimed. "Darn! I missed the New Year."
William grinned at her, "Hey, there'll be others...I'm just glad you're alright...which is more than I can say about those who did this to you."
Georgie's face darkened and her smile disappeared, "Who do you mean?"
William looked at her, "You tell me..."
"I...ah...I don't know," stammered poor Georgie. "I don't even know what happened." She looked helplessly at Dr. Lumberton.
Dr. Lumberton said, "William...it seems that Georgiana remembers all the events of her life up to about Christmas...and then it's a blank. She can't recall her concert or any of the subsequent events. So, she has no idea what happened to her. It's what we call a partial amnesia. It's kind of like her brain is purposefully trying to forget certain traumatic experiences."
William looked concernedly at Georgie, "But will she ever remember?"
Dr. Lumberton, "I don't know. It's quite possible...and it's not. A look or word might trigger the memory. Or she might never remember. It just varies from case to case."
William said, "But she has to remember! How will we ever find her assailants...!"
Dr. Lumberton shrugged his shoulders, "I'm sorry William. But at this point, we should just be happy that she's back with us." William nodded. Dr. Lumberton continued, "I'll give you two time alone...can I send in the others soon?"
"Yes," replied William. "Just give us 5 minutes." He watched him leave the room, then turned to Georgie. "You don't remember anything?"
Georgie shook her head, "No...I don't. It makes me so mad, but I can't remember anything about that...all I know is that it was something bad..." She sighed, "I'm sorry, Will..."
William cut her off, "No, no Georgie...no need to be sorry. It's okay. You don't need to be sorry...no...the people who hurt you...they'll be sorry. Really sorry! Sorry they ever messed with my sister. I'll hunt them down and personally see that justice is served. They're not getting off easy. No way!"
Georgie smiled, "Now, it's at times like these that I rejoice at the fact that I'm your sister and not the bad guy. I can imagine what'd happen if I ticked you off!"
William laughed, "Well, laugh about it all you want, but I was worried sick about you, Georgie. You don't know what it's like sitting here day after day, seeing you lifeless, and wondering whether you'd survive. Sometimes I almost gave hope, but then I gathered all my courage and had faith."
Georgie held out her hand, "I know what you've been through Will, and am very sorry to have caused so much trouble and pain."
William smiled, "Pain yes, but no trouble Georgie. I'm just glad it's all over...you know all that time I just wished you'd wake up so I could tell you --- I love you very much, Georgiana Darcy. You mean the world to me, and if anything ever happened to you, I could never forgive myself for not taking better care of you. Ever. I could never live with myself knowing that I'd let you down..."
"Oh William!" cried Georgiana, hugging her brother. "You haven't let me down...how can you even say that! I also love you very much and owe you so much for being there for me after mom and dad died."
The brother and sister talked a little more, catching up on lost time. Then William said, "Well...I can't just hog you like this. I guess it's time to let the others come in."
"Who else is here?" asked Georgiana.
"Caroline, Richard, Jane, Charles and Melissa..."
"Melissa!!!" cried Georgiana. "What's that witch doing here?!"
"Georgie!" a very shocked William exclaimed. "She was your nurse when you were sick. Be kind to her."
"I hate her," said Georgie. "But you knew that already. And I bet the only reason she came to nurse me was so that she could be close to you."
William shook his head at his sister. Georgie had never been close to Melissa and had later come to deeply dislike her, especially after his break-up with Liz which had been partially instigated by Melissa's antics. But still... He sighed, "Ok, Georgie, I'm going to call them in. Please be a little nice to Melissa...for my sake?"
Georgie sighed, "Oh alright...but only for you."
William smiled, "There's my good girl!"
Later that night; at the Bingleys'
Rachel was fast asleep and Liz finally decided to go down and wait up for Jane and Charles to come home. She couldn't sleep anyway. The thoughts of William and Georgie plagued her and she only wished she could have gone with them. But of course, Rachel's needs came first. Liz also found that she was hungry, having not eaten much since lunch. So, she got some milk and cookies and settled on the couch in front of the TV. There was nothing much on, except one of the countless showings of 'Casablanca'. Even though that movie always made her cry, Liz figured she could use some Humphry Bogart right about then.
A little later, the sound of the front door opening alerted Liz that Jane and Charles were coming home. Few moments later they appeared.
Liz had tears flowing down, "Oh...he's letting her go....no! Go after her Rick! Don't do this!"
Jane smiled, "Watching 'Casablanca' for the thousandth time Liz? And still trying to change the ending!"
Liz looked up at her sister, "Well...it doesn't hurt a girl to try!"
"And god knows you've tried!" exclaimed Jane.
"Hey! I sense some mocking here!" cried Liz. "Just because I'm addicted to sappy romances and know all the lines and keep trying to make them change the ending, doesn't mean I'm weird!"
"No, you're not, Liz," Charles remarked. "You just joined 99% of the female population." He laughed, "Now if you girls will excuse me, I'm tired. I'll be off to bed" He kissed Jane, "Good night, Jane. I assume you'll be with Liz for a while."
"Yes dear," Jane smiled. "Good night!"
Jane watched her husband leave, then turned to Liz.
Liz asked, "So how is she doing?"
Jane sat down next to her and picked up a cookie, "Pretty well, considering the situation. But there's a catch...she doesn't remember anything about the accident and never might."
Liz exclaimed, "But that way we might never find out what Lydia was doing there! Argh!"
Jane nodded, "It's tough."
"William must be very happy," commented Liz, switching channels to watch 'Gone with the Wind' or more specifically Clark Gable.
"Yes he is," Jane agreed. "In fact, I've not seen him smile so much for a long time. He looks so adorable when he smiles."
Tell me about it! "Yeah, I guess," Liz said, trying to appear indifferent.
Both sisters munched on cookies and watched the movie.
Liz said, "I wonder how they used to get into those dresses." She was referring, of course, to the 18-inch-waist dresses worn by Scarlet O'Hara. "I couldn't fit into one of those for a million dollars!"
Jane laughed, "That's why they hired Vivian Leigh, not you!"
Liz gave Jane a nasty look. "Hey! Are you saying that I'm fat?"
"No," replied Jane, in the same vein. "You're just pleasantly plump!"
"Hey! No fair!" cried Liz, in mock-hurt. "You get to pick on me like that and I can't so anything since you're just so perfect!"
Jane laughed, "I was just kidding...you know that, right?!"
"Of course, Jane," Liz laughed. "Don't let me fool you...I'm not as dumb as I seem!"
The sisters just watched the movie in companionable silence. All the time, Liz was making a resolution. She'd have to tell Jane about...herself. This was it. She had a doctor's appointment for the next day and Jane would have to know. There was no point postponing it. It had to be done. The sooner, the better. Liz made up her mind.
"Jane?" she said, turning off the TV.
"Wait! That was my favorite part!" exclaimed Jane, wanting to watch more of Rhett Butler. But then seeing Liz's serious demeanor, she asked. "Lizzy? What is it?"
"Jane, there's something I have to tell you," said Liz. "I didn't come to New York by accident."
"What do you mean?" asked Jane.
"Um...I asked particularly to be given an assignment here."
"Really?! But I thought you loved Boston...what happened?"
Liz shuffled her feet, uncomfortably, "Well...there was something I wanted to tell you and I just thought it'd be better to say it in person rather than over the phone."
Now Jane was absolutely mystified, "I have no clue what you're talking about. But it sounds so important..."
"It is," said Liz. "I went to Dr. Santora's the other day. He had some results of a test I'd got done a while ago. And the results say..." She continued to explain the whole thing to Jane who just listened dumbfounded.
After Liz was done talking, Jane got up from the couch and walked a few feet away...completely silent. Not a sound. Then she turned around, "How long have you known?"
"About 6 days," said Liz, quietly.
"Oh." Silence.
"This is just a joke right," Jane said, finally. "You're just pulling my leg to tease me, right?"
Liz looked at her sister and shook her head. Boy, this was harder than she'd imagined.
Jane said, "But Lizzy! This can't be right...no!"
"It is."
Jane broke down and started crying next to her. The sisters held onto and comforted each other. Finally, Jane quieted down, "But it's not very bad?"
"Yet," said Liz, pessimistically.
"Lizzy!" admonished Jane. "I don't want you saying that. You're going to win this. We both are."
"I sure hope so, Jane," said Liz. "I sure do...for Rachel's sake."
Jane nodded. She felt her heart break as she watched her brave, little sister. There were no words to describe what she was feeling at that moment...pain, hurt, anguish, anger...This was such a big blow. She hadn't been expecting it, at all. This was so sudden, so decidedly unwelcome. Jane just wished she'd wake up and find out it was a nightmare.
"Jane," Liz said, breaking the silence. "There's one thing, though."
"What?"
"I don't want you to tell anybody, not even Charles."
"But Lizzy!" exclaimed Jane. "I can't keep anything from Charles...he'll see right through me. I can't lie to him."
"Well...only Charles then," said Liz. "But you have to swear him to secrecy. I don't want to advertise my problems to the world...I don't want any sympathy from anyone."
"Not even William?" ventured Jane.
"Especially William," said Liz, determinedly. "Please Jane? Will you do that for me?"
Jane thought for a second, "Of course. I don't understand it, but I will."
"Thank you, Jane," said Liz, with tears brimming in her eyes.
The sisters hugged and talked a little more before each decided it was time to go to bed. As they were gathering their stuff, Liz suddenly said, "Jane, if something happens to me, you will take care of Rachel, won't you?"
Jane almost dropped her cups, "Lizzy! I won't hear it...I don't want you talking like that. Enough with that nonsense...nothing's going to happen to you. You're going to see your daughter grow up."
"Yes, Jane...but just in case..."
"You know I love her very much and will take care of her," said Jane. "But it's never going to come to that."
Liz simply nodded and followed her sister. She was glad it was all over. This secret had been tormenting her for a long time and now she'd finally told someone. It felt like a big relief. But Lizzy was sure, she didn't want William to know. Ever! Maybe that was impossible, but she sure wanted it that way. She knew why, too. If she couldn't have William's love, she sure didn't want his sympathy. He'd feel sorry for her and would be nice just out of pity. And that was a fate Liz didn't want. She'd die, if she have to, but she'd die with dignity. Her only regret was that she might never be able to tell William about her everlasting love for him. But that was one reality she'd just learned to live-or die-with.
Chapter 31
The next morning; February 8; at the Bingleys'
Elizabeth came down for breakfast with Rachel. Jane and Charles were already there. And from the look of things, Jane had told Charles.
"Good morning," greeted Liz brightly, pretending as if nothing was different. "Is it going to snow again today?"
Charles replied in the affirmative. He talked with Rachel a little. Then he addressed Liz, "When's your appointment?"
"At 10," said Liz.
Charles nodded, "At Ramsgate?"
"Yes, Charles...with a Dr. Peterson...do you know him?"
"A little," said Charles. "I cross him the halls, and had lunch with him once. But are you taking Rachel with you?"
"I guess so," said Liz, buttering her toast. "I haven't talked with a child care center or anything yet."
Jane said, "I'm coming too, Liz. Rachel will stay with me."
Liz looked at her sister, "But Jane, you took yesterday off too...don't you have to go back to work?"
"No," Jane shook her head. "I told them I'd be late. You are not going through this alone."
Liz smiled affectionately, "Thanks, Jane. That's why I came to New York in the first place. I didn't want to go through this alone. And besides, Dr. Peterson is considered the best in his field."
"Yes," agreed Charles. "He's pretty good. And I'll talk to him today. You'll get the very best."
"That's okay, Charles," said Liz. "I don't want any kind of special treatment."
"No special treatment," said Charles. "I promise."
The adults ate breakfast in silence, while Rachel chatted and watched her favorite cartoons.
Then, breaking the silence, Charles said, "I understand you want to keep this private Liz, but what about your very close friends?"
Liz shook her head, "No...you have to understand...not a soul...not anyone. Word travels fast and they all will know soon enough. I don't a big mourning ceremony. The last thing I need right now is for everyone to feel sorry for me. I can't stand that!"
"Okay, fine," said Charles. "Rest assured, I will not utter a word about this to anyone."
"Thanks guys," said Liz, her voice filled with emotion. "I knew I could count on you."
Jane and Charles looked at each other in silent comprehension. They knew what a tough time Liz was going through. She not only had to come in terms with her condition, but she also had to be strong for Rachel's sake. It was not easy for any of them, but it was not meant to be. This was probably another test of their strength and integrity. And they were all more than ready to face it.
11:30 a.m.; Ramsgate Hospital
Jane and Rachel were seated in the waiting room, as they awaited for Liz to come back from her appointment. Jane tried to take Rachel's mind away from her mother as she played little games with her. Rachel was quite content and did cause too much of a fuss. Jane was grateful for that. She had had too many experiences with little Rachel getting out of hand.
Suddenly, a figure approached them. "Why Jane?! What are you doing here? And Rachel too!"
Jane looked up to see William smiling at them.
"Wiuam!" cried an overjoyed Rachel as she held on to his legs.
William laughed as he picked her up. He asked Jane again, "I assume Liz is around here somewhere...are you waiting for her?"
Jane nodded uncomfortably, thinking of a reason Liz would be there. "Yeah, she needed some regular check-up."
William bought the story without suspicion, "Oh alright!" He talked to Rachel asking her all sorts of questions. Rachel giggled and laughed. Jane watched them in surprise. Knowing about William's insignificant dealings with little children, he was handling Rachel remarkably well. And Rachel appeared to think that being in William's arms were the most natural thing in the world. Anyone who saw them at that particular moment would have sworn that they were father and daughter.
Even as all that was going through Jane's mind, a figure approached them.
"William!" cried Liz. "What a surprise! I didn't expect to see you here."
William put down Rachel who went to her Aunt Jane. For her part, Jane observed Will and Liz very closely. This was getting very interesting indeed. She could feel the electricity between them and wished that she was somewhere else so that they could have more privacy. But Jane knew that if she left now, Liz would never forgive her. She was way too vulnerable to be alone with William right now.
"Yes, neither did I," said William. After a brief pause, "I came to sign some papers about Georgie."
"Speaking of Georgie," said Liz. "She doing okay?"
"Yes," said William. "Though she was dying to see you."
"Really?" asked Liz, very touched. "I hope you told her why I couldn't come."
"Yes I did," said William. "But I remember hearing you say that you would come later."
Liz nodded, "Yes, I was thinking of coming in to see her today...if that is not too inconvenient."
"No, no! Of course not!" said William. "No inconvenience. Georgie will be very happy! In fact, I was heading home right now...why not come with me?"
Liz looked at Jane, who said, "Go ahead, Liz. I'll go to work, I suppose."
Liz thought for a moment. She didn't want to be alone with him in the car, but then again, there would be Rachel. "Okay, Jane. Thanks for coming!" She kissed her sister on the cheeks. She whispered in her ears, "I'll talk to you later."
Jane nodded slightly, understanding that Liz wanted to talk about her appointment with Dr. Peterson. She said goodbye to Will and Rachel and left. William turned to Liz, "So...shall we go?"
"Sure," said Liz, with a slight smile. "But...I must warn you...Rachel is getting hungry. She becomes quite a menace when she's hungry. Maybe we should stop somewhere on the way to grab a bite?"
"Sounds like a good idea!" smiled Will. "And I can never imagine Rachel being a menace."
Liz laughed, "Wait till you know her long enough. I'm sure you'll change your view then."
"No," Will said softly, shaking his head. "I don't think anything will change my view of Rachel..." Or her mother, he added mentally.
Liz didn't say anything as she sensed her resolve weakening. William's soft voice and dark eyes mesmerized her and she felt like telling him everything. Telling him about why she was there and what was wrong with her. Most of all, telling him that she loved him. But of course, that wouldn't do. So, she turned away her head to prevent herself to falling for the temptations. She knew that she'd forever regret it if she did.
They walked on to William's car. Liz secured Rachel on the child safety seat, as she sat on the passenger seat herself. The ride was uneventful as such. William was very cheerful and optimistic, filled with hopes for Georgie. Though he didn't say so directly, he made several veiled hints to their conversation in the kitchen the previous night; hints that Liz chose to ignore. As far as she was concerned, he was just being nice and friendly. And that was the end of that. Of course, any third person would have scoffed at the idea, but both Liz and Will were famous, or more specifically notorious, for their blindness and obtuseness in the matters of the heart. Maybe it was just a curse, but those two were perhaps the only couple in the world, who in spite of being madly in love with each other, failed to accept and express it.
They arrived at William's house after a brief stop for lunch. It was a very petty house, each brick spelling affluence. It had been made in the late 19th century when William's ancestors had moved to New York from a small town in England. Hence, this house was called Pemberley - named after its original model in Derbyshire. It was, by no means, as grand or vast as the one in England, which had since been demolished. But it was still grand enough to announce to any new arrivals or mere observers that the opulence and wealth of the Darcys' was intact. In the age and times, the Pemberley of New York City would be considered a mansion.
Liz had always been fond of this house, ever since she'd first seen it. That had been a long time ago, but Liz still could recall every tiny detail...viewing the house with her Aunt and Uncle Gardiner, feeling like an intruder, meeting with old Mrs. Reynolds, Melissa's mom, and then bumping into William...literally, unexpectedly. What a surprise that had been! A pleasant surprise, in many ways. He had just come out of his pool, with his wet, disheveled clothes and damp hair. What a sight! And all polite and nervous...he had been simply irresistible! So cute and adorable! Of course, she had been too disconcerted to pay much attention then.
Suddenly, something shook her elbow to break Liz out of her reverie. Will said, "Liz! Where are you? I swear, you were smiling so strangely...!! What were you thinking?"
Liz blushed, embarrassed at her thoughts. "I'm sorry...I was just thinking about something." And then, she smiled enigmatically and proceeded inside the house.
They made their way to Georgie's room, through the well decorated rooms and hallways. The inside of Pemberley was as awe-inspiring, if not more, than the outside. With its beautiful paintings, statuettes and other priceless ornaments, Pemberley stood as a remnant of the days past and the glory forgotten.
Liz sighed, "It's so beautiful in here. I can't imagine how you ever bring yourself to leave this place...I know I wouldn't!"
Will smiled, "Thank you...but I believe there is a lot that the world can offer that Pemberley lacks..." Primary example...you!
"Yes, I guess," said Liz. "But with money like yours, I would just buy all that was worth buying and bring it here!"
Will shook his head, "But you forget, the best things in the world can't be bought..."
"Like peace of mind?" said Liz.
"Or love..." added William softly, then blushed, afraid he might have said too much.
Liz fell silent, contemplating his words and trying to figure out whether they had any deeper meanings. But then, she shook her head, laughing at her own stupidity and inability to come in terms with the truth...whatever that might be.
They came to Georgie's room, and stopped.
Will said, "I'll go in and tell her that you're here."
Liz nodded, as she held Rachel's hand, who was a little shy in the big, strange house. Within moments, Will emerged from the room, smiling. "Come in, Liz. Georgie will be thrilled to see you."
Liz returned his smile, as she entered the room. Georgie was sitting on the bed with a magazine on her lap, grinning.
"Look who's finally here," she said, cheekily.
"Georgie!" exclaimed Liz, hurrying to her side. "It's so wonderful to see you again."
"Me too, Liz!" said Georgie, hugging her. "And who's that hiding behind Will's leg? Come here, Rachel..."
Rachel approached the bed, "Goggy?"
"Yes, precious," laughed Georgie at hearing her name thus said. "Gee! There's only one Rachel!" Then turning to Liz, "Whatever made you think you needed permission to come in! I'm disappointed Liz! I thought you were the sister I never had!"
Will cut in, "Don't be so difficult Georgie!"
Liz smiled, "I can handle it, Will! It's okay." Addressing Georgie, "Even sisters can be a little polite, you know. No harm in that."
"I guess," said Georgie. "But not that formal... 'May I come in, Miss?'... 'Yes, why thank you!'... 'That would be delightful'... ha!"
Liz laughed at that, "Georgie! All my worries for your health are gone! If you can be that wicked, rest assured, you are back in full form! Glad to see that, sister."
Georgie smiled a little, "I missed you, Liz...I haven't seen you for so long." Then touching a more delicate topic, "I didn't even know about John...I'm sorry."
Liz nodded, "Thanks." Then changing the subject, "So...I hear you can't remember anything about your accident."
"Yes," frowned Georgie. "And it's so frustrating. I have this feeling about it, but I can't put a finger on it. Argh!"
"It's okay...it'll all come back to you in good time," said Liz. "Meanwhile, when are you returning to school?"
"I don't know," sighed Georgie. "I want to go soon, but William over there thinks I'm strong enough to do that." This was said with a reproachful glance at her brother.
William crossed his hands over his chest in mock protest, "Wait a minute...I can't have you girls teaming up on me."
"Who said I was on her side?" said Liz, with a mischievous glint in her eyes.
"Well, aren't you?" asked Will.
"Yes, but that's besides the point," she said. "You should never assume!" And she winked at Georgie, who just smiled.
"Oh no!" cried Will. "I know this is a loosing battle, but I'll try anyway. I think Georgie should stay out of school for another month at least."
"A month!" exclaimed Liz. "Good heavens! I could never sit at home for that amount of time with nothing better to do than look pretty."
"I knew it," muttered Will. "I knew I was going to be outnumbered. So what do you think?" He asked Liz.
Liz responded, "I think that she should probably rest for a couple of days...a week perhaps, then go back to work...easily at first. But what's the doctor's opinion?"
Georgie cut in, "He said that I was doing great and that nothing was wrong."
"Ah-ha!" cried Liz. "There you go. I rest my case."
William groaned, "And who is to be the judge, then?"
"Why me of course," said Liz, laughingly.
"But you're on her side!" exclaimed Will.
"Too bad for you, huh?" laughed Georgie. "Or should I say...lucky me!"
"Not fair!" Will cried.
"But then again Mr. Darcy," said Liz, impishly. "Whoever said that life was fair?"
"That means, I win?" asked Georgie.
Liz nodded, "Case closed!" Both Liz and Georgie giggled like schoolgirls, while Will just groaned, saying, "I knew it was a bad idea to bring Liz here."
"Hey! You invited me!" said Liz.
"Who says I can't regret that," returned Will. He was amazed at himself. He'd thought that it might be very awkward to bring Liz to Pemberley and here she was...laughing and teasing him like the old days. He would never have thought that he'd get a chance to see her there again. It was such a joy to see her and Georgie such good friends. It really took him back...way back.
Georgie sighed, "I haven't laughed so much for so long! If only you'd come here more often, Liz."
Liz smiled, "I would, but you see...your brother is regretting his invitation already. Who is to say how he'd be tortured if I came regularly?!"
William shook his head, "You can twist my words more than a road in the jungle...that's why you're a lawyer!"
"As are you!" returned Liz, in the same vein.
There was more friendly laughter and William felt very comfortable in Liz's company. And that had not happened in a long time. This was truly a surprise.
Georgie, "So, it's settled, then? I go back to school in a week?" She looked at Will.
Will looked from Georgie to Liz, and back. He sighed, "I can tell when I'm outnumbered and defeated. Okay, Georgie, you win!"
"Thank you, William!" exclaimed Georgie. "You're the best, Liz!" She winked at Liz, who just smiled good-naturedly. "You know, Liz...I think we really need you here at Pemberley...that ought to keep everyone in good spirits and William in check!"
Liz blushed and was about to answer when Melissa walked into the room.
"Georgiana, I...," she started to say, then stopped on seeing Liz. "Oh! I didn't know we had visitors. How are you, Liz?"
"I'm fine, and how are you?" returned Liz, with equal brevity.
"I'm doing pretty good," said Melissa. "And so is Georgiana. In fact, she's recovering very well. I'm so glad."
Liz and Georgie exchanged glances. Liz said, "Yeah, me too. But of course, Georgie's recovery means you won't be needed here anymore, doesn't it?"
Melissa glared at her. "Well...I don't know about that. Georgie is still not that recovered."
"Oh, I'll do fine, Melissa," Georgie joined in. "I'm sure you have other more important things to do. I wouldn't want to take up all your time, would I?"
"Oh, no, no!" exclaimed Melissa hurriedly. "No problem at all! I just love working here. I can stay as long as you want!" She looked pleadingly at William as if urging him to stay.
"Um..." said William. "I'm sure we have plenty of time to decide about that."
Liz admired the way Will handled the situation. He showed a lot of tact. It really impressed her, though she would have much rather had him tell Melissa off. But hey... some fantasies are just not meant to be. After staying and chatting with Georgie for a little longer (with frequent interruptions from Melissa), Liz got up to leave.
"Do you have to go, Liz?" asked Georgie with a little pout.
"Yes, Georgie, I really do," said Liz. "I have tons of things to take care of."
"Yeah!" sneered Melissa. "I'm sure she's very busy."
"Unlike some other people," snapped Georgie. Then addressing Liz, "I'll call you later, okay?"
"Sure...I'm at Jane's for the time being," said Liz. Then collecting her things and Rachel, she started to leave. Will said, "I'll drop you off..."
"No, that's okay," said Liz. "I'll take a cab. I don't want to cause any more trouble."
But Will insisted, "No way! It's no trouble at all."
But Liz was firm, "No, Will...it's fine. I've been on cabs before. I don't want to waste anymore of your time."
William sighed, "Okay. Have it your way. At least let me walk you to the door."
Liz and Rachel said their good byes and left the room with William, who walked them to the door. As Liz was stepping out, Will said, "When will I see you again?" His tone had some urgency, causing Liz to look at him earnestly.
"I don't know," replied Liz.
"Soon, I hope," said William.
"Yeah...maybe," said Liz, smiling faintly.
"I'll miss Rachel, you know," Will said hurriedly, trying not to give away any of his real feelings.
Just Rachel? Not me! Liz's face fell. "Yes, well...you can always come and visit her."
Yes! "Is that invitation?" he asked. She's only concerned about Rachel, but at least she's asking me.
"Do you want it to be?" countered Liz, with a glint in her eyes.
"Maybe I do," replied William, with a smile.
"Then, maybe it is."
"Then, I'll come," said William.
"Rachel will be happy," smiled Liz. And so will her mother.
"It's settled then," said William. "Rachel's happiness comes first..."
"I wouldn't have it any other way," Liz returned. A cab pulled up. "I'll be going now...bye William."
"Bye Liz! Rachel!" William watched them leave. He smiled to himself. He'd gotten an invitation to visit her, even though he used poor Rachel as an excuse. Meanwhile, Liz got into the cab and waved to William. He looked so adorable. She was so glad that he'd promised to visit her, even thought she'd used Rachel as an excuse.
William walked back into the house and into Georgie's room. Melissa was gone, for which Will was thankful. He'd had enough of her for one day.
"Is she gone?" asked Georgie.
"Yes," muttered William.
"I wish she could've stayed."
"Me too," said William, with a huge sigh.
"Then marry her," stated Georgie simply.
"Excuse me?" William was surprised. "What do you mean?"
"Come on, Will!" said Georgie exasperated. "I'm not blind and I'm not stupid! And I was here for the last hour. I know what's going on!"
"I'm not sure I know what you mean," William said trying to appear innocent.
"Quit being all superior, Will and listen to me," said Georgie. "You have a chance and I, for one, would hate to see you waste it...you know, it's Valentine's Day in 5 days. Do something cute, something special. It's bound to work!"
William looked at his sister, "Do you think so?"
"YES!" cried Georgie. "Trust me...I'm a girl, I know. Go for it, Will!"
William thought about it, "Maybe you're right..."
"I know I am!" exclaimed Georgie, glad that she'd finally made her point. "Just follow my advice, Will...it'll take you places!"
But William wasn't listening. He had his own ideas, and he left the room, in deep reflection. Georgie shook her head, with a smile. There goes a man deeply stricken by the arrow of love...god help the poor saps who find themselves around him!
As she was thinking on those lines and laughing to herself, she phone rang. She had an extension next to her bed, so she picked it up. "Hello?"
"Hello?" said the voice on the other end.
Georgiana couldn't quite place it, but it seemed so familiar. "Who is this?"
The caller obviously was confused, as he/she hung up without another word. Georgie put the receiver down, thinking that it was strange. Why did that voice seem so familiar? It bugged her. But she simply shrug her shoulders and thought no more about it.
Meanwhile, Wellington Apartments, Edison, New Jersey
George Wickham hung up the phone swearing to himself. Georgiana Darcy had picked up the phone. Damn her! What did it take to get rid of that girl?! All his work and Lydia's sacrifice came to nothing. Melissa assured him that Georgie remembered nothing, but what if her memory came back? What if she remembered everything? What if she recognized that it was him?
No, George couldn't have that. No way! He had to act, and act fast. There was no other way. Self preservation had precedence over everything else. And George knew what he had to do, what would have to be done...Georgiana Darcy had to go. And this time...for good.
Chapter 32
Evening; February 8
Elizabeth had spent chief of the day, after coming home from Pemberley, getting her affairs settled. Moving from one place to another was undoubtedly a hassle, be it temporary or permanent. But it was something that simply had to be done...time and again. Liz knew that she couldn't stay on with Jane too long, even though Jane insisted it was no trouble. But the last thing Liz wanted was to be any kind of a burden. It was just not her style. And besides, she she'd be starting work soon anyway. So she had a little 'condition'...that did not mean she was ready to give up on life and become a recluse. She was a fighter and would wage this battle...whether she won or not...that was for time to tell.
Rachel was tired and she went to bed after an early dinner. Liz relaxed in front of the TV waiting for Jane. As she sat there all alone, Liz could not help but think about how her life had changed and evolved...especially her relationship with William. It was all too confusing and Liz no longer knew her own heart. Rather, she knew her heart but was too influenced by her brain to follow it.
Liz lay on the couch trying to figure out her own life. Many people have been very philosophic and asked many such questions as 'Who am I?' and 'What is my purpose?'. But Liz just had very basic questions about her life to figure out... 'Who am I' and 'What do I do with my heart?'. Thinking such dark and heavy thoughts, she slowly drifted off to sleep, dreaming of someone in particular...someone she cared about very deeply...someone with ocean blue eyes and dirty blond hair.
Meanwhile, at Pemberley
William had taken Georgie's advice to heart. She was right! He'd wasted too much time being cautious and waiting for the right time. That was what was wrong with him...he was way too careful. He'd lost the chance and the nerve way too many times. And William was resolved that this wouldn't be another one of those times. This time he would bare everything for Liz again . She could either accept him and make him the happiest man alive...or...she could reject him and they'd go their separate ways. Needless to say, William would much rather have the former occur, but this was not in his hands. Strangely though, William had a good feeling about it. He felt that he'd finally gotten it right. If fortune favored him, he might know what happiness was once again.
St. Valentine's Day was only 5 days away. That was when he'd make his move, as Georgie had already suggested. Now all he had to do was to take care of the little detail and god willing, Liz would have the time of her life...assuming of course that she wanted to be his Valentine. William smiled. This could be fun. He turned on the radio in his room as he began making his initial plans.
It's tearing up my heart when I'm with you
But when we are apart I feel it too
And no matter what I do I feel the pain
With or without you.
Ah...thought William. Never has this song struck such a cord with me as it has now. He instantly thought of Elizabeth and his feelings for her.
Baby I don't understand
Just why we can't be lovers
Things are getting out of hand
Trying too much, but baby we can't win
But no! We can win, Lizzy...William sighed. At least, there is still hope...
Let it go
If you want me, girl let me know
I am down
On my knees
I can't take it anymore
That's true...William mused. I really can't take it anymore. All this uncertainty and seeing you without knowing what you think of me...it's killing me!
It's tearing up my heart when I'm with you
But when we are apart I feel it too
And no matter what I do I feel the pain
With or without you
Without you...??? William felt terrorized at the idea of life without Liz...once again.
Baby don't misunderstand
What I'm trying to tell you
In the corner of my mind
Baby it feels like we're running out of timeLet it go
If you want me, girl let me know
I am down
On my knees
I can't take it anymore
We are running out of time...thought William. But I'll get down on my knees for you, Liz...if that's all it'll take...
It's tearing up my heart when I'm with you
But when we are apart I feel it too
And no matter what I do I feel the pain
With or without youTearing up my heart and soul
When we're apart I feel it too
And no matter what I do I feel the pain
With or without you*
William sighed...This really is tearing up my heart, Lizzy...you probably don't know what it's like...maybe if you had any feelings for me still...if you'd only understand.
William had decided what he was going to do for Valentine's Day. He had it all planned out. But first, of course, he had to ask her. That would be critical in deciding his future with Liz. If she accepted him, fine and dandy...and if she didn't...well, William just hoped and prayed that it wouldn't come to that. But he was resolved not to give into any of his fears or negative thoughts...yet.
Meanwhile, in Duke's Bar, Edison, New Jersey
Melissa was whining, "Well...you know what, George...sometimes using you brain isn't such a bad idea. In fact, it might even prove useful once in awhile."
George winced, as he said sharply, "Now, now don't get all personal. What's the matter?!"
"What's the matter?! He says. Bah!" Melissa cried. "Why in the world would you keep calling in the home line, I don't understand."
"Maybe if you had a cell phone..." sneered George. "But anyway, enough with the whining already. You sound like a spoiled brat. We have greater problems at hand...Georgiana."
"What about her?" asked Melissa suspiciously.
"We have to get rid of her," stated George, matter-of-factly. "There's no other way."
"But, but..." Melissa tried to say.
"No buts," said George firmly. "Maybe she doesn't remember anything now but that's no guarantee...it might all come back to her. I can't risk that and neither can you. You don't want all your bitchy, scheming ways exposed to William, do you?"
Melissa said nothing.
George smiled, "I knew you'd concur. After all, you are a very smart young woman, Melissa. You know what works for you and what doesn't. There's not much difference between us, really."
"Except that I am not wanted by 5 states," Melissa muttered.
"What was that?" George said sharply. "One more smart word from that pretty face of yours and even your dear William won't be able to recognize it. Get it?"
Melissa nodded meekly.
"Okay," smiled George again. "Glad we got that all straight. Now as for business...when is she going back to school?"
"Next week," replied Melissa.
"Good," said George. "Now as for my plans for her..." He laughed an evil laugh and told Melissa of his plans.
"But George!" cried Melissa after the narration. "That is insane! It's too dangerous...what if it doesn't work?"
"Do you have any bright ideas?" Melissa shook her head and George continued, "Okay then...shut up and listen...this is what you have to do."
"Now don't I feel important?!" she muttered.
George gave her a testy look, but made no comment. He explained to her the role she would play in the 'operations'. Melissa listened closely, even though she was a little reluctant. Not because of her concern for Georgie, but because of her feelings of self-preservation. But she had come this far, she would have to take it all the way...no matter what the consequences or repercussions.
A little later; at the Bingleys'
Jane shook Liz, trying to wake her up. "Lizzy! I'm home! Wake up!"
"Wha--?! Lizzy said, groggily. Then looking up to see her smiling sister. "Jane?"
"Yep, that's me!" Jane smiled. "You looked so cute, sleeping on the couch. I almost didn't want to wake you but then, I thought maybe you'd like me to wake you. So? How was your day?"
"Fine," said Liz. "Oh...I arranged for my apartment. I'll be moving tomorrow."
"Oh Lizzy!" cried Jane. "What's the rush? You could have stayed with us for a while."
"No, Jane," replied Liz. "It's okay. My company had it all arranged...it's a pre-furnished, 2 bedroom apartment. It's just right for me. And it's right next to one of the best day-care centers. What else do I need?"
Jane resigned herself. "Oh, okay...if you must. But that really was quick."
"What'd I tell you?!" smiled Liz. "I had it all figured out."
"So you did," said Jane. "Now...tell me...what did Dr. Peterson say?" She sat down next to Liz and looked at her earnestly. Liz could see that Jane was worried and rightly so.
"Well..." began Liz, and she told her everything.
Jane listened intently, giving few comments. After Liz was done, "So...when do you start the therapy?"
"In one week, probably," said Liz. "But I'm going back to see him soon." Liz paused, then she said, "Jane, I'm scared..."
"Oh!" said Jane as she hugged her sister. "It'll be alright, Lizzy...I promise. You'll be just fine." The sisters just held onto each other as they each thought about the situation.
Then, Liz released herself from the embrace and said, "Btw, Georgie is doing quite well!"
"Really?" said Jane, with interest. "Speaking of which, how was your visit to Pemberley today?"
"Okay."
"Just okay?" Jane raised here eyebrows. "Is that all the answer I am to have the honor to expect?"
Liz laughed, "Oh Jane! That sounds so weird! What do you want me to say? Yes, it was great...beautiful. I loved it."
"Yes, that's more like it," smiled Jane. "And William? How was he?"
"Nice."
"Just nice?" laughed Jane. "Here we go again..."
"Very funny, Jane," said Liz. "But you're not getting me to say anything that I might regret later." She yawned. "I'm sleepy. I think I'll skip dinner and just go to bed. Good night, Jane."
"God night, Lizzy. Sweet dreams."
Liz smiled at her and left. Speaking of dreams, Lizzy remembered the dream she'd been having right when Jane woke her. It had been something about John, though she couldn't remember what. It had been a pleasant dream and Lizzy could recall the feeling she'd had...as if it was all real. But it was strange. She hadn't dreamed about John at all lately. Why now? Maybe she was thinking too much...or maybe the dream was a sign, a message?
Liz trudged to her room, feeling excessively tired. Perhaps it was just a normal exhaustion after a day of busy work. Or maybe it was one of the side effects Dr. Peterson had warned her about. She didn't know. It was better that way. Sometimes ignorance is the best thing. Rachel was sleeping quietly. Liz smiled and kissed her on the cheeks. She was such a dear.
Liz got into her PJs feeling much more comfortable. She slid under the covers next to Rachel and tried to sleep. But she couldn't. Her mind was wandering. She found herself thinking of Valentine's Day...and William. She wondered what he would be doing that day. Going out on a date maybe? With Melissa? Liz was shocked to feel a wave of jealousy at that thought. But she shook that feeling away. But she couldn't help but wonder what Valentine's Day with William would be like. Nice... Suddenly a scene flashed in front of her from a long time ago. And she remembered everything clear as a bell.
Valentine's Day, 1994
The snow coated earth and the mountain slopes gave the skiing lodge a definite romantic atmosphere. The newlyweds sat close by each other next to the roaring fire. Liz rested her head on John's shoulders as she sighed.
"There's nowhere else I'd rather be right now," she said.
"Me too," said John, stroking her hair gently. "I always want to be with you...but you knew that."
Liz smiled, "Yes...you've mentioned that once or twice but it doesn't hurt to hear it."
"I always want to be with you," repeated John.
"And I, you," said Liz, softly. She looked into his clear, blue eyes, but found herself inevitably thinking of a pair of dark eyes...
"Lizzy?" said John.
"Hmm..."
"Do you love me?"
Lizzy sat up, "Of course I do?! What a question to ask?!"
"More than William?" John said softly.
Lizzy was very uncomfortable. "Wha--...what do you mean?"
"Look," said John. "I'm not stupid. I know you love William, even though you deny it. If I was a nobler man, I would not have married you at all. But the truth is that I just love you too much. I know you love him and I can understand that. But I just wish...I hope that you can learn to love me just as well..."
"John!" exclaimed Liz. "I love you. You know I do. And I married you, remember?"
John just nodded, "I know I'm being silly. But I just can't get rid of the awful feeling that one day I'll wake up and you'll leave me...for William. It frightens me because I know I can't live without you..."
"Oh John!" cried Liz as she moved into his embrace. "You know I'll never do that!"
"I know," said John. "At least...I think I do. But remember this, no one in this world can love you more than I can...not even William. And if one day you decide to leave, I'll still be there for you."
Liz shook her head, "John, you're not listening to me. I'll never leave...and that's simply because I love you! No ifs and buts about it. It's as easy as that. You just have to trust me."
John smiled at her, "Gee...now I feel like an insecure jerk!"
Lizzy laughed, "Well, I love you anyway."
"You just made my day...my life. I love you too," John said, and he kissed her. "Happy Valentine's Day!"
"Happy Valentine's Day!"
Back to the present
Thinking about that, Lizzy felt all her doubts melt away as she made up her mind. Now she remembered all the reasons she had married John in the first place. And now, she knew what she had to do...with regards to William...if he ever approached her, that is.
* Tearing up my heart -- N Sync
Chapter 33
Morning; February 9; at the Bingleys'
Jane and Charles were just getting ready to leave for work. They had been very eager to stay home and help Liz move, but she insisted that she would be fine. After all, she told them, it wasn't as if she really had to move anything...just her travel bags. Her new apartment was pre-furnished. There was a purpose for that too. Even though Liz didn't tell Jane and Charles, she had accepted that apartment for a reason. She felt deep inside her, this fear that she wouldn't be living in her house for long...that her condition would take its toll on her. And of course, she already had a beautiful house in Boston...this was just a temporary arrangement.
"Bye, Liz," Jane kissed her on the cheeks. "I'll call you later."
Liz nodded and smiled. Charles hugged her and said, "Maybe we can stop by your place this evening and see how you're doing?"
Liz laughed, "Sure, Charles! No problem! But don't feel obliged to do that. I'll be fine."
"I know you will," smiled Charles. "But you can't stop me from visiting my favorite niece!" And he kissed Rachel.
"Your only niece!" Jane said, slyly.
Charles laughed, and shook his head. And after a few more good-byes, they were off. Liz had her own set of keys, so she'd be locking the house when she left. She watched Jane and Charles leave with a tiny smile playing on her lips. They were so good, so kind, so perfectly suited for each other. She'd never seen them fight or disagree about anything. Maybe that was a rather boring way of going through life. After all, most of us take pleasure from a good debate once in a while. But at any rate, Jane and Charles were happy. And that was all that mattered in the long run.
Liz sighed as she closed the door and went into the kitchen to finish her breakfast. She still remembered her dream from the previous night. She'd seen John again, and she couldn't figure out why. After all this time even. The emotions it evoked, frightened her. But on the brighter side, at least she wasn't so darn confused anymore. She had figured out what she wanted to do. And even though it would take a lot of will power to do it, she was ready...ready to sacrifice her heart for the benefit of both her and William.
1 p.m.; At Messieurs Darcy & Fitzwilliam
Richard came into William's office with a huge smile. William looked up, smiled at him, and then went back to work. "So," he said. "Set a wedding date yet?"
Richard said, "Not exactly...I'm impatient, but Caroline wants me to wait a little. Maybe in two months, she says." He sighed. "I don't know if I can wait that long, but I guess I'll have to." He broke off, then laughed, "It's just that every time I see her I can't help but think how lucky I am!"
William smiled at his cousin, making no comment.
Richard continued, "Oh...there was one thing I wanted to ask you, though. Will you be my best man?"
William looked up, "Of course, I will! What do you think?!"
Richard said, "Good..." He smiled again, "Oh! I'm just so happy!"
"You really do love her," observed William. No duh!
"Yeah, I do," Richard admitted. "Can't you tell?!"
"I've never seen you smile so much, that's true!" said William. "And I've known you all your life. So that is proof enough for me."
"And it's all because of that reunion, too!" said Richard. "If I'd not been to that, there's no saying what would have happened?"
"Speaking of the reunion," said William. "I want to ask your advice about something..."
This caught Richard's attention, since William never asked his advice for anything. "Really?! Shoot..."
"Um...it's about Liz..." William began to say.
Ah-ha! Just as I suspected! Thought Richard, but said nothing.
"You know it's Valentine's Day in 4 days, and I want to do something special..."
Now it's getting interesting, thought Richard. "Special as in...?"
William shrug his shoulders, "I don't know...I just want her to know that I care about her. No pressure...just an offer of love, so to speak. I don't want her to feel obliged to commit to anything, but I do want no doubts left in her mind as to the nature of my feelings for her."
"And you want my advice for...?" Richard asked.
"What do I do?" William said, helplessly. "I thought of taking her out to dinner...but that's too predictable...and I don't want to leave Rachel with babysitters. After all if we're going to be a family Rachel has to be a part of it."
"Family, huh?" Richard raised his eyebrows. "Really William, you move too fast for me!"
William blushed, "Okay...so now you know. Anyway what do you think I should do?"
"First off," said Richard. "Have you asked her yet? I mean before you spend a lot of money on stuff you should at least know whether she'll even go with you..."
William shook his head, "I haven't actually asked her yet, but..."
"No buts William," interrupted Richard. "You have to do that. What if you get everything all figured out and then she doesn't come?! That would not be good...worse than asking her now and being rejected."
"Why are you assuming she won't come with me!" William cried. "Do you know something I don't?!"
"No, no!" Richard exclaimed. "That was a purely hypothetical situation. I'm not implying anything! I was just considering all possibilities. Okay?"
William nodded, "That does make sense,I suppose. Alright...I'll ask her first."
"Good!" said Richard. "And I do have tons of romantic ideas, too..."
"Okay!" said William. "Fire away!"
Meanwhile, at Liz's apartment; 4:00 p.m.
Liz was setting up her living room, when the front bell rang. "Coming..." she said, as she made her way to the door. She opened it and, "Carrie!"
Caroline hugged her friend and exclaimed, "Can I come in, Lizzy? Or are you busy?"
"Of course, you can!" Liz replied, letting Caroline in. "I was just putting some things together. Rachel is taking a nap." Then looking around the apartment, "So...what do you think?"
"Very nice," said Caroline, appreciatively. And it was quite pretty and well done. Caroline was no interior decorator but she could tell that the apartment was very well done...the colors and furniture, etc.
"Of course, I take no credit," said Liz. "It was like this when I came."
"But you do have good taste," said Caroline, smilingly, as she sat down on the couch. "I was passing by and I wanted to see how you were doing. Jane gave me your address, you know."
Liz sat down beside her, "I'm doing fine, I think."
"Lizzy...you have dark circles around your eyes," said Caroline. "Do you get enough sleep, honey?"
Liz said, "Um...actually...no, well...sort of."
"Well, then start today," said Caroline. "You know how you get without sleep."
"Okay, mommy!" laughed Liz. "Anyway, you never told me...how does it feel to be engaged?!"
"Pretty exciting," smiled Caroline. "Especially when I love Richard so much! We are so happy. And he's so sweet. Every day I feel like I could fall in love all over again!"
Liz just smiled, identifying with the feeling. "So, when's the big day?"
Caroline said, "I haven't fixed the exact date, but it's in about 2 months. Speaking of which...Lizzy...will you be my maid of honor?"
Lizzy grinned, "You know I will!" And then she added, "Of course you must promise me not to pick out a horrendous dress that I'll suffer in!"
Caroline giggled, "Lizzy! I'm a model! Don't you trust my taste in clothes!"
"I do!" Lizzy returned. "But I don't trust your sense of humor or revenge...who knows! You might decide to get me back for all the little tricks I played on you in college!"
The two friends giggled and laughed like a bunch of schoolgirls, teasing and talking about nothing of importance. Then Caroline asked, "Oh, btw, Lizzy, you never told me...what prompted you to come here all of a sudden. I thought you hated New York. Changed your mind about the old city, eh?"
Liz's face darkened visibly, "No, I didn't change my mind. There's some work that's got to be done in the New York branch of my form. And my boss picked me. That's all there's to it."
"So, how's it going with William?" asked Caroline, slyly.
"What do you mean?" Liz feigned ignorance.
"Oh c'mon! I thought we were over that game!" Caroline exclaimed. "There are no secrets between you and me...even if you wish there was."
Liz sighed, "Seriously Carrie...there is nothing going on between William and me. You'd better believe it. It's the truth."
Something in Liz's eyes convinced Caroline, as she nodded, "Oh, I see. Well! This really is a surprise. But I should have known better...you two were always so obstinate."
"What is that supposed to mean?!" demanded Liz.
"Exactly what it sounds like," said Caroline. "You may deny it to yourself, but you know that you love him. And I know for a fact that he loves you. So what in the world is keeping you apart, is beyond me!"
Liz got up from the couch and walked away. Caroline knew she had upset Liz unwittingly. But there was no other way. Someone had to talk to those two and it might as well be her. She got up and followed Liz to the kitchen. Liz had her back turned towards her, and Caroline could see she was crying. She put her arms on Liz's shoulders attempting to bring her to face her. Liz complied. Her face was stained with tears.
Caroline was guilty, "I'm sorry, Liz. I didn't mean to - "
Liz shook her head and cut her off, "It's okay. I'm alright." She moved away and got a box of Kleenex. "It's just hurts me to hear that all you guys think that I'm being selfish and obstinate. I wish you could see it my way..."
Caroline nodded, "Okay, let's start there. What is your way of seeing it?"
Liz shook her head, and sighed. "No, Carrie...it's too hard to explain. You won't understand, you can't! But just try and remember...Will and I have too much history behind us. It's hard to overcome that. And there is little possibility that we're ever getting back together."
This was said with a finality which told Caroline that the discussion was closed. And Caroline knew that she should respect Liz's wishes. She looked at the time and said, "Oh, it's getting late. I should be going. Bye Lizzy! Take care!" She hugged her friend and started to leave.
As she was at the door, she turned around and said, "Lizzy...sometimes it's best to ignore your brain and follow your heart." She smiled, and then she was gone, leaving Lizzy to reflect on those words.
7:00 p.m.; at Pemberley
Georgiana was in her room, reading a book on music when her brother entered. She looked up, smiled and said, "Boy, someone looks nice today! What's the occasion?"
William blushed self-consciously. "Do I look okay? Not overdone?"
Georgiana studied at his casual, but elegant look and smiled, "You look great! She is will love it!"
William smiled, "You sure?"
"Positive!" said Georgiana. "So, it's the big night, huh?!"
William nodded. Georgiana asked, "Nervous?"
"You bet I am," said William. "What if she says no?! How will I bear that?!"
"First off," said Georgiana. "She won't say no, and even if she did, at least you tried your best. Don't be nervous. You know how that affects you."
William laughed, "Yeah, we definitely don't want sweaty palms and stuttering speeches!"
"That's the spirit!" exclaimed Georgie. "Now get out there and win her heart!"
William smiled, kissed her sister, and said, "I'd be lost without you, Georgie! Thanks!"
Georgie beamed, "Anytime, Will!" As she watched her brother leave, she said slyly, "Don't hurry back!" William just grinned and she gave him a 'thumbs-up' sign. Georgie had a good feeling about this. If William just avoided being a complete jerk, she felt like he could win Lizzy this time around. She was positive that Lizzy still loved her brother. So if he played all his cards right, she might soon have a new sister. That thought excited Georgie, as she settled in her bed, making plans for the future.
8:00 p.m.; at Liz's apartment
The front doorbell rang and Liz thought, Who now?! "Coming..." she called as she dusted her hands and made her way to the door. She opened the door and gasped!
For there at her door was a huge bouquet with at least 4 dozen, long stemmed, exquisite, red roses.
"Oh my gosh!" she exclaimed, peeking behind the roses to see the owner, though she had made some guesses as to who it could be. And sure enough, her guess was right.
William's voice said, "These are for you...can I come in?"
NO! Please! Liz said, "Um...sure." She led him inside, carrying the flowers. "These are beautiful, William. Thank you so much!"
"I, ah...thought that you might like them," he said awkwardly.
"Won't you sit down," said Liz, hurriedly, trying to delay the inevitable.
William sat down on the couch. "Would you like something to drink?" she asked.
"Oh, water's fine," he said, looking around. "This is a nice place you got here." Liz came back with the water.
"Thank you," she said. And then, "William...I'm terribly sorry...but it's Rachel's bedtime and she doesn't go to bed without me..."
"Oh, of course," said William. "I understand...maybe I can come and say 'hello'?"
"Um..." said Liz. "Sure!"
They went down to Rachel's room, where she was lying in her bed. Seeing them come in, she exclaimed, "Mommy! Wiaum!"
"Hello, Rachel," said William, smilingly.
"Will you read me a bedtime story?" Rachel asked William.
Liz said, "Honey, don't bother William...I'll - "
But William cut her off, "No bother at all. I'd love to read you a bedtime story, Rachel." And he picked up a copy of 'Beauty and the Beast' and started to read. His smooth, modulated voice and dramatic reading proved just right and surprised Liz. Slowly, Rachel started falling asleep, and by the time the terrible beast turned into Prince Charming, she was fast asleep.
William stopped reading, and whispered, "Is she asleep?"
Liz nodded and motioned him to quietly exit the room. She tucked Rachel in and followed him. Once outside, she said to him, "That was very nice, William. I didn't know you were an expert at bedtime stories!"
"I didn't know either," smiled William. "But I guess you never find out till you try!"
Liz didn't say anything as she felt uncomfortable holding his gaze. She walked on towards the living room. William followed her there. Liz turned around and said, "How is Georgiana doing?"
"Great!" exclaimed William. "She remembers you all the time."
Liz said nothing, just smiled a little. "Would you like some wine?"
William said, "Sure, thanks." He sat down as she left, thinking of an opening to say what he'd come to say. He'd have to do it soon or else he'd lose his nerve. She just looked so vulnerable, so beautiful. William was shaking with nervousness and he was scared he might forget his "lines".
Liz returned with the wine. They quietly sipped it for a while in uncomfortable silence. Each had thoughts of the other in their mind. The hiatus in the conversation bothered them not. They were too busy trying to sort out their inner turmoil to think much of that.
Suddenly, William got up, put down his wine, and walked about the room. Liz observed him in silence trying to think what he might say next. She didn't have to wait long. William turned to face her, and said, "Liz...as you might tell, there's something on my mind, and I - "
Liz interrupted him with, "William...please don't say anything that you might regret later..."
William shook his head, "No, Liz, I won't regret this...ever. No matter what the outcome. But let me finish...please?"
Liz could say nothing, which William took as an assent. He said, "Expressing my feelings and emotions has never been a strong point with me, I might say. I have the knack of always saying things the wrong way and always end up offending people. I am determined not to do so now. So, now, Elizabeth, I have for you, a poem..."
He approached where she was sitting, got down on his knees and said:
"When once have I been so very blessed,
To have loved you dearly and never any less.
That feeling has never been so very great,
As I feel right now, and have done as of late.And because I fear that I can go no more,
Without assurance of your heart's open door.
My dear, Elizabeth; dearest angel of mine,
Accept this poem, and be my Valentine."*
All through the poem, William stared directly into Liz's eyes. But as he was done, Liz's emotions overwhelmed her and she ran from her chair to the corner of the room, crying.
William had no idea what he'd done wrong, and was very bewildered and concerned. He approached Liz, and said, "Lizzy? Did I upset you? Talk to me?"
Liz refused to look up, and continued to cry. William tried once again. He was standing next to her. "Lizzy. Please...you're breaking my heart. I can't see you cry. Tell me it's not because of me? Please, look at me..."
At length, Lizzy looked up. Her tear-stained, puffy face appeared to William, more beautiful than ever. He said, "Lizzy? Please...what's the matter...?"
"Oh William!" exclaimed Liz. "That was such a beautiful poem, but I'm afraid, I can't..."
"Can't...what?" William had a sinking feeling in his stomach. "Lizzy, you're scaring me now..."
"William, I can't go out with you," said Liz, through her tears. "Please don't ask why..."
"But Lizzy!" exclaimed William. "You can't do that. There can be no reason why you can't, unless you don't want to, which I would understand..."
Liz turned away from him. His eyes were hypnotic, in a way and she was mesmerized. "William...someday, you'll understand what I'm talking about. Please don't make this any harder for me..."
William grabbed her by the shoulders and spun her around to face him. His eyes were ablaze. He said, "Lizzy...you don't understand...I love you. I always have. I accept everything that happened in the past. But I still love you. If you say no to me again, I'll never bother you. But you have to answer a question...honestly...do you love me?"
Liz said nothing, she couldn't. She couldn't lie or say the truth. It was just too painful. She tried to free herself from his grasp, but couldn't.
"Do you?" he repeated the question.
"I do! I do! I do!" cried Lizzy, breaking down. "Dammed! I DO!!! Do you even have to ask? Haven't I always loved you, no matter what? Oh god, why are you doing this to me?"
"Why am I doing this to you?" asked William, incredulously of the woman who was playing with his heart. "Oh g-d!" He could take her proximity no longer. He bent forward and sought her lips. And then he kissed her.
At first, he could feel Liz fight him, but then she surrendered to his passion and kissed him back with equal fervor. They stood there clasped to each other, their passions and love united. It had been so long since they had last kissed and the force of so many years' separation played upon them. If there had been any doubt in their minds, it was now dispelled...they truly did love each other. It was strange, but true.
Then, Lizzy broke off, and pushed him back.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that," said William. "You don't know how long I've dreamed about that..."
Lizzy looked at him quietly.
William said, "Will you change your mind?"
"No," Lizzy shook her head. Then moving away from him, said, "Please, Will...please leave before we do anything that would prove fatal to our relationship..."
"What relationship?" said William, bitterly, as he picked up his coat and started to leave. When at the door, he said, "I'll always love you...never forget that."
And then, he left.
* The poem is written by yours truly.